The Choices We Make
by cathrineoriginal
Summary: "It is a long story, child. And it is about time that you got to know it." I closed my eyes for a second. This was it, this was my choice yet again. The choice I make now, will change the life of my family forever. It is about time I told them about falling in love with Jackson Nathaniel Teller
1. Chapter 1

**I have fallen in love with "Sons of Anarchy"**

 **I know that the series ended in 2014, and I know it's been there, but it hasn't appealed to me before now. I've seen almost every episode in the matter of days. (Yes I know, I don't have a life).**

 **Please tell me what you think and I hope you'll enjoy the story!**

 **P.s: That speech in the beginning of this chapter is borrowed from a website. I do not take credit for writing it.**

 **I got this idea in my head the other night and I just wanted to try it out to see if it would work.**

 _ **I do not own "Sons of Anarchy" Only my OC's and other characters I may create later on.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

" _Every one of us runs into a situation where you have to MAKE YOUR OWN CHOICE. And the choices one makes depend on how you view life and the HABITS you adopt, and from there one everything is touched as if we touch it with a Magic Wand._

 _Most of us have a big PROBLEM on how to approach PROBLEMS. Most of us get CONFUSED when we are faced by a problem, whereas the least of us learn how to MASTER LIFE after handling problems successfully._

 _LIFE situations TURNED OUT BAD because one was unable to handle PROBLEMS and adopted the wrong HABITS._

 _When we you look at all of these LIFE SITUATIONS, we see two groups of people. Those who chose a PRO-SURVIVAL route and those who chose the route of DESTRUCTION and DEATH._

 _Our current society is our product. That shows how well we handle problems._

 _We are walking around BLIND with our eyes wide open. Just ask anyone walking around us WHO are we? What are our CAPABILITIES? What is LIFE? MIND? SPIRIT? … You'll get a blank stare and a shrug. They have acquired the HABIT of IGNORANCE, the habit of not wanting to know._

 _One piece of wisdom I learned from L. Ron Hubbard is that TRUE LIFE starts with the ability to CONFRONT our problems, as opposed to flinching, avoiding, destroying. And he makes it clear that when you flinch, avoid or destroy you are going to make that thing stronger and more powerfully working against you._

 _So we have CHOICES TO MAKE and those choices become HABITS. You can choose to use force or ability, choose the material or the spiritual._

 _TWO CHOICES, you can be or not to be, to know or not to know, to be cause or to be effect, to make it negative or positive, to destroy it or to create it._

 _Because LIFE IN THE END… either at the end of the day, at the end of a period of time or at the end of this life is what you MADE IT TO BE."_

* * *

This was my word to myself… So that I didn't forget the choices I made.

I had taken them out of my journal. Inspired by old memories, to give it intensity.

I think back on my own choices I made growing up. If I could've gone back in time, would I have changed them, avoided them?

No, not a chance…

Otherwise, I wouldn't have had the thing we all want most in this world.

Danger…

Excitement…

Adventure….

Undying love…

By making my choices, I experienced the adventure of my life. I found out how much in love one person could be. The one thing I craved from a young age. Finding the love of your life, fighting tooth and nail to hold onto that, only let the bond grow stronger. A love you only find once in a lifetime and at the same time. Bless with kids, three charming kids that means the world to me.

Time sure does fly.

I can't believe it's been almost 50 years, 50 years without him but even though my heart's aching for him, I never regret the choices I made back then. We were living in a dangerous world and we promised each other to get out. Grow old together, having more children and having grandchildren.

He would always be the love of my life, no matter what….

* * *

"Grandma, We're here!" I hear voices from the hallway. I know those voices anywhere. My darling grandchildren. I have 10 of them and I love them all the same. They are the reason I am still alive and kicking. Only two of them stayed in town though.

"Up here sweethearts." I call as loud as I can.

"Grandma… Why are you up here in the attic? How did you even get up here?" My oldest grandchild Donna asked as they dodged the beams and cobwebs.

"I'm 85 stupid, not invalid." I said with humor as I greeted each grandchild with the same amount of love.

"Hi grandma." My youngest, Harry said.

"Hi, sweetheart." I said and patted his cheek.

"So, do you mind telling us why you wanted us to come?" Donna asked looking around.

"I need your help to bring down some boxes. I'm looking for something but I don't know which boxes so I need your help to bring them down.

"Grandma… there's a shitload of boxes up here. How the hell are we going to do this?" Harry exclaimed.

"Watch your mouth before I wash it with bleach! Anyway, I was kind of hoping your Aunts and your father would have turned up to help us." I answered with a sigh.

"And that's why we're here." My son said as he popped his head up through the hatch.

"Ah! Wonderful!" Please help me take these boxes down stairs." I said after kissing my three children and giving them hugs.

* * *

"You know how I feel about you coming up here by yourself, ma. You could seriously hurt yourself." My youngest Jackie said as she helped me down the latter.

"I know sweetheart, but I wanted to do it." I said with a smile. "Now, help your brother, sisters and your niece and nephew with the boxes. I will make us something to eat and drink."

The noises that filled the house soothed me. This was how life was supposed to be like.

I was an old woman now, I've lived my life, I only wished that he would've been here for this. I bet he would've loved it.

"Ok, grandma! All the boxes are down now!" Harry yelled from the living room. With help from Jackie and my other daughter Emma, we brought the beverages to them.

"What are we looking for, Ma?" My son asked me.

"Some old memories." I said approaching the first box. I hadn't looked at these boxes for years. I hadn't touched them in what seemed like forever. I don't think I've opened them since I packed it all away 50 years ago. This was harder than I thought, but I had to do it.

"Why now, grandma?" Donna asked as she opened one box.

"Because it's time, sweetheart." I answered with a kind smile.

We opened box after box but I couldn't seem to find what I was looking for. I had start to believe that I misplaced it and it crushed my soul.

"Woah! Check this out!" Harry exclaimed as he took out some sort of clothing. "This is so cool!"

I made my way over to them in hope that Harry had found it. And there it was…

The thing Harry held in his hand, was a cut. A black cut.

The back was covered with the grim reaper and over it was a name.

 ** _Sons of Anarchy_**

I could feel my eyes starting to water, but I suppressed it.

"Wow. I haven't seen this since I was a kid." My son exclaimed. "I thought this got lost back then."

"I know, and I'm sorry, Abel. I'm sorry I hid it away from you all these years. It was just hard and we've been through so much." I said with a quivering lip.

"I know, ma… I know." He said hugging me tightly.

"Wait… what is this?" Donna asked and I could tell that my daughter has also had a hard time following this.

"It's a long story, child. And it's about time that you got to know it." I said as I sat down with the cut in my hands, tracing the patterns on the back and front where the label **_President_** screamed at me.

"Would you mind telling us?" Harry asked. I closed my eyes for a second. This was it, this was my choice yet again. The choice I make now, will change the life of my family forever.

But then again, it's my choice. My choice to let them know about their heritage.

It was about time I told them the story of how I fell in love with their grandfather…

 **Jackson Nathaniel Teller**

* * *

 **So, what do you think? Is it worth** **pursuing? Do you want me to continue?**

 **Please let me know.**

 **Until next time (hopefully) xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***


	2. Early Days

**I am so sorry about the wait! It only took me about 6 months to get my butt into gear. I kind of fell off the SOA boat, after I watched all seven seasons but I've picked it up again now, hopefully, I will be able to continue this time around.**

 **Read, review and enjoy the next chapter!**

 _ **I do not own "SOA" only my OC.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 **Early Days **

_"It's about time I tell you about your grandfather." I said mostly looking at Abel. I knew that he remembered his father._

 _"What do you mean, Grandma Sophie?" Donna asked puzzled. "I thought that Grandpa Chibs was the real deal. I looked at my oldest grandchild with a smile._

 _"Oh, my sweet child. There's so much you don't know." I said with tears threatening to fall._

 _"Yes, Grandpa Chibs was a huge part of your lives but he wasn't your real grandpa." I looked at my grandchildren with hope. I wanted them to feel loved._

 _I looked over at Abel and I could tell that he felt the way I did. Chibs had promised me from day one to look out for me._

 _"Could you tell us the story about our real grandpa?" Donna asked me and I looked at her with tears in my eyes._

 _"Of course, darlin'" I said, kissing Donna's forehead before she sat down._

* * *

Growing up in a small town like Charming, California in the 80's and 90's was not that boring, as you would think. We had the music, the fabulous clothes, everything kids today would see as totally boring and tacky, but that's the way we lived.

We were in our own kind of world, Jax, Opie and me. We did everything together. The two boys were born in the same year of 1978 and I the following year of 1979.

We had been the best of friends since I was born. I was Jackson's friend Harry's foster sister. My mom died when I was born and we never knew who my father was, so Harry's parents took me in.

I remember the summer things changed for me. The summer we chose to be there for each other, always.

* * *

 ** _Charming, California August 1988._**

This is where our story start, or not really. Jackson and I have known each other since birth and this year he finally turned ten, making me jealous, I was a year younger.

Jax's parents, Gemma and John, invited my foster parents, Mary and Piney and their best friends, Otto and Luanne to a cabin just about an hour away from Charming.

It surprised me that Mary wanted me to join them. Somehow, for no apparent reason, she seemed to hate me. I didn't really understand her behavior; I was only nine.

I was in my room playing with my new 'Superstar Barbie' I got from Gemma for my birthday a few weeks ago. Jax and Opie couldn't understand my fascination with these kinds of girl stuff but they still liked to play with me but not right now. Now, the boys were outside playing, pretending they're badass bikers, just like our fathers. Jax's little brother Thomas couldn't play outside like the other kids, so he stayed inside with me. He was a sick four-year-old and he was more than happy to play with me.

I was completely lost in my own little world, using the doll to dream about what I want to be when I grow up. I want to help people. Maybe become a nurse, that was what my mother was before she died, that's what they told me. I used the doll and Thomas, pretending to be in the hospital, taking care of them, patching them up like I've seen the doctors doing to Thomas at the hospital.

Thomas began to giggle as I wrapped his chest with bandages and it irritated me.

"Now, Thomas, you shouldn't laugh. Your wounds are serious." I said, trying to keep a straight face.

"But it tickles, Sophie..." Little Thomas argued with a smug look on his face.

"I know, but it's the only way for you to not be sick anymore." I told him and he tried his best not to laugh anymore. Thomas waited patiently for me to finish, and stayed perfectly still.

"I feel better." Thomas said, as he removed his thumb from his mouth and it made me happy that he did.

The bedroom door opened, and a woman entered, with a teary smile. She was pretty, I always thought she was pretty. This was Gemma, Jax and Thomas' mother. She was the one to tuck me in at night, made sure that I felt safe. I was her little princess and I love her.

"Hey mama Gem." I said, before going back to helping Thomas.

"Hey, sweetheart." Gemma said and kissed the top of my head. "What are you doing?"

"I'm fixing Thomas, so he doesn't have to go back to the hospital." I said with all seriousness in my voice. This was very important to me. I could tell that Gemma was sad. I didn't want her to be.

"Oh, you sweet, wonderful girl." Gemma said and hugged me. "Never change, okay?"

"Okay." I said and hugged her back, not understanding why Gemma was so sad.

"Now, if you're ready with what the two of you are doing, lunch is ready and if we don't go now, I'm afraid that John and the boys will eat everything and we can't have that, can we?" Gemma said, making me shake my head. John would always try and do things like that to me, but not this time. I sprinted out of the room, only to find John putting a lot of food on his plate.

"Uncle John! Don't eat it all! You're going to get fat." I said, stopping to poke him in the belly.

"Why, you little." John said, raising his voice, chasing me around the room. I couldn't help but laugh. We always did this. Jax and Harry came in just as John finally caught up with me and grabbed me. I started screaming with laughter, when he twirled me around in the air. I caught my foster mom staring at us in disgust. Why did she hate me so much?

"Alright, everybody. Dig in, or I'll eat this shit all by myself." My foster dad, told us. John kissed my cheek and placed me down on a chair next to him. Jax sat down across the table from me, next to Harry. Mary decided that she would sit close to me, because she didn't trust that I would behave.

"Sophie, sweetheart, please pass me the salt." Mama Gem told me. I nodded and reached for it, knocking over my glass of soda in the process, all over Mary's lap.

"Look what you did, you stupid piece of shit!" Mary yelled, jumping up from her chair. "You can't seem to do anything right!"

I felt my lip starting to tremble and I tried not to let my tears spill.

"That's enough, Mary!" Piney snapped at his wife. "The girl made an accident."

"Well, then. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it? You're mother made an accident, getting pregnant with you." Mary hissed at me.

"Shut up, crazy bitch!" Gemma said, but I couldn't stay there anymore. I jumped out of my chair and ran outside, ignoring Thomas crying for me and Gemma yelling at Piney for not controlling his wife.

* * *

I ran until I reached the treehouse John built for us a few summer's ago. I wasn't allowed to climb it by myself, but right now, I didn't think about it and climbed it anyway. When I finally reached the top, I sat down with my favorite bear and cried my eyes out. I couldn't understand why Mary hated me so much.

After about half an hour, I heard Mama Gem, Jax, Harry and John calling my name, searching for me.

"Sophie, sweetheart. Where are you?" I heard Mama Gem yell.

"She couldn't have gotten far." John said, trying to reassure his wife.

"I think I know where she is, dad." Jax said, running towards the treehouse.

"Jax, she's not up there, she would never go up there alone." Gemma said, following her oldest son.

"Trust me, Ma. I know my best friend." Jax told his mother, starting to climb the three. I sat there, not saying anything. I just wanted to be alone.

"Jax, be careful!" Gemma said, feeling overprotective.

"Calm down, Gem, Jax knows what he's doing." John told her. Jax poked his head seeing me sitting in the far corner, crying into my bear.

"I found her." Jax yelled down to his parents.

"Oh, thank God!" Gemma exclaimed. "I'm coming up!"

"Don't. Let Jax talk to his best friend for a while." I heard John tell her and I was glad. I didn't want to see the sad look on Mama Gem's face.

"How you doing Sophie?" Jax asked as he finally managed to climb through the door. I didn't answer him and continued to cry. He noticed me shaking, so he took the blanket laying on the little table and wrapped it around the two of us, sitting down next to me.

"Why does she hate me, Jax?" I asked, my voice muffled by my bear.

"I don't know, Soph. I don't know why she's saying all those bad words to you." Jax answered with a sigh.

"I don't know what I did wrong. I didn't mean to spill my soda." I said, finally looking up at him. Jax gave me a pitied look.

"I know you didn't." Jax said, placing an arm around my shoulder. We could tell that someone was climbing the tree, thinking it was Jax's parents, but it was Harry, stumbling into the treehouse.

"Hey. Sophie, I'm so sorry mom was such a bitch to you." Harry said and I gasped from his use of language.

"What? My dad calls her that all the time." Harry said innocently.

"You're an idiot, Harry." Jax told his best friend.

"No, you are." Harry argued back. "But are you okay, Sophie? I know my mom is hard on you."

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I just don't want to see her right now." I answered, playing with my bear.

"You know what. I don't care what mom says about you. You are my sister, and I love you. Mom can go to hell for all I care." Harry said, crawling under the blanket on my other side.

"Yes, and we will always be your family, Soph, no matter what." Jax agreed.

"We will always be family, won't we?" I stated, looking at the two boys that I considered to be the best friends a girl could ever ask for.

"Always." The two boys replied and sandwiched me into a hug.

I sat there in between the boys talking about how we would run the club when we were grown up. How we would stick together, making the club a safe place to be.

* * *

After what felt like forever, Jax and Harry finally convinced me to come down from the treehouse. I didn't want to see Mary again, though, but I was hungry and I wanted to see Thomas. When we reached the cabin, we could tell something was different. One of the cars was missing, but we thought that maybe someone had gone to the store or something.

Mama Gem opened the door, feeling relieved that I finally came down from the tree.

"Oh, sweetheart. Are you okay?" Gemma asked, getting down on her knees in front of me, kissing my forehead.

"I'm okay, Mama Gem." I whispered. Gemma only smiled and ruffled my hair.

"Come on, let's get you some food." Gemma said and followed me inside, and it was good to have her there, knowing that Mary would be there.

But I couldn't find her anywhere.

I sat down at the table as Gemma gave me something to eat.

"Thank you, Mama." I said, digging into the food, glad that John saved something for me.

"You're welcome, baby." She said softly, stroking my cheek.

* * *

Gemma and I sat there talking, when Piney suddenly came into the room.

"Hey, Gemma. Could I have a moment alone with Sophie for a minute?" Piney asked. Gemma eyed him for a few seconds, before nodding and leaving the room. I thought I would be yelled at and stopped eating and didn't dare to look at him.

"I'm sorry for spilling my soda." I said with a small voice. "Please don't be mad."

I could hear Piney taking a deep breath.

"No, honey, don't apologize. What Mary said to you, wasn't fair. You're not an accident, not at all. You're family and I'll always love you." Piney told me and I couldn't help but cry a little.

"Why is she always mean to me, and why is she saying bad things about my mom?" I asked, finally looking up at him. Piney didn't know what to say, how to answer my question.

He placed me up his lap, hugging me tightly.

"I don't know, baby. But always know, that you'll forever be my little girl." Piney whispered into my hair. "And you don't need to worry about Mary, I sent her home. I would rather have you here."

I was glad that Piney wanted me to stay.

"I love you, Piney." I said, closing my eyes.

"Love you too, kiddo. Love you too." Piney answered, kissing the top of my head.

* * *

That night, Thomas wanted me to share his bed with him, and I couldn't say no. I loved that little guy. But he's not easy to sleep next to. Thomas kept hitting me in the face and kicking me in the leg, making me uncomfortable.

I was thirsty, and wanted something to drink, so I tiptoed my way into the kitchen, getting me some water. The grownups sat outside talking and smoking, so I didn't want to bother them. When I walked back to the room, I stopped, hearing my name. I thought that Gemma had seen me but that wasn't it.

"This whole thing with Sophie is fucking messed up." Gemma said, firing up another cigarette. I could hear Piney groan.

"Gem… don't." John warned her.

"Don't what? I don't understand why it should be like this. I don't understand why this dumb piece of shit isn't telling Sophie the truth." Gemma fired back. The truth about what? I thought to myself. Daring to creep a little closer to listen more.

"Gemma, this is none of your business." Piney hissed, feeling as if he was backed up into a corner.

"It is my business. I love that little girl, my Goddaughter. This mess is all your fault, Piney." Gemma fired back at him.

"That's enough, Gem. We don't want to wake the kids. We've all done things we're not proud of." John said, trying to calm the two of them down.

"Well, I'm not the one that couldn't keep my dick in my pants, knocking up a fucking no good stripper, leaving an innocent girl on your doorstep. And you don't even have the balls to tell her that you're her father. Feeding her crap about being a foster kid. It's disgusting." Gemma huffed.

Wait. What's a stripper? I asked myself. Is Piney my real dad? Why would he lie? I noticed that Piney stood up.

"I'm going to bed." He growled and I hurried back to the room, closing it quietly behind me. I looked over at Thomas, who had moved lying like a starfish, taking over the entire bed. I looked over at Jax, sleeping like a baby in his own bed. I quietly tiptoed over to him, shaking him softly.

"Jax." I whispered. "Jax, wake up!"

"What?" I asked tiredly.

"Can I stay here with you? Thomas is kicking me out of bed." I whispered. Jax groaned but allowed me to jump in with him.

"Why are you crying?" He whispered, and I didn't even know I was.

"It's a long story, I'll tell you tomorrow." I said.

"Oh, okay." Jax said and closed his eyes again.

"Hey Jax? Never break my heart, okay?" I whispered before closing my eyes.

"I promise I will never break your heart, Sophie." I heard Jax whispered back before finally falling asleep.

* * *

 ** _Oberlin, Ohio, Year 2064._**

 _I looked at my family, clutching onto Jax' Sons of Anarchy Cut, waiting for reactions from them._

 _"Wow… That Mary woman sure sounds like a real bitch." Harry exclaimed, earning a slap on the back of the head from his father._

 _"Don't talk like that in front of your grandmother." Abel told his son with a warning._

 _"Sorry, grandma." Harry mumbled under his breath._

 _"It's okay, sweetheart." I said, trying not to laugh at his expression._

 _"So, how did it go when you told Piney that you overheard their conversation?" Donna asked, intrigued by my story._

 _"Oh, it would be a few more years before I finally told him that I knew, sweetheart." I told her and she seemed disappointed._

 _"But what about, grandpa? Did he break his promise about not breaking your heart?"_

 _I looked down at Jax's Cut again, thinking about all the times I cried over him. How many bumps in the road we had, how many fights and breakups._

 _"Oh, yeah. Your grandfather broke my heart a few times over the years. And my heart wasn't the only one that broke. Jax broke a lot of hearts during his years."_

 _"How many?" Donna asked eagerly._

 _"Now, now, Donna. Let's not get ahead of ourselves. I told you, it's a long story. We'll get to that, but to do that, you'll need to hear it all." I said, with a sigh._

 _"Starting with what's to become the three toughest years of our lives… with the loss of loved ones._

* * *

 **What did you think?**

 **Again, I am so, so sorry about the wait.**

 **I will do another chapter, covering the funerals of Thomas and John before catching up with the seasons.**

 **That will also be the last time I will go back to the older Sophie. She will come back towards the end.**

 **Until next time!**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***MissTeller-Ortiz-Dixon: Thank you so much! Sorry it took this long to get it going again. I will try and continue this as much as I can.**

 ***Guest: Thank you!**

 ***decadenceofmysoul: Thank you! Sorry for the wait!**

 ***beth626: Thank you. Hope you're still there, wanting to read more.**

 *** 18: Here's the next chapter!**

 ***xxcuriousmexx: Here's the next one! Sorry for the wait.**

 ***india-guest: Awe to you too!**

 ***Black Dragon 42: Here it is!**

 ***bethie86: Thank you!**

 ***ayarian88: Here's the next chapter!**


	3. I will Try To Fix You

**Thank you all for you comments on the last chapter! It really means a lot to me.**

 **I am proud to give you the next chapter in my story.**

 **A lot of things happens in this chapter, and I am sorry for that. I just wanted to get the story going.**

 **Let me know what you think!**

 _ **I do not own SOA, only my OC**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 **I Will Try To Fix You**

 _Donna was going through one of the many boxes as the others went into the kitchen to make us something to eat. I observed her every movement and expression. She reminded me so much of myself when I was at that age. She picked up an old photograph, studying it intently._

 _"What you got there, sweetheart?" I asked putting my glasses on._

 _"Grandma, who are these kids?" Donna asked, handing me the photo. It was a photo of Jax, Opie, Thomas and me. From Thomas' last stay at the hospital, just about a week before he died. Tears welled up in my eyes, thinking about that time._

 _"This is me with Jax, Opie and little Thomas." I said, stroking the picture._

 _"How old were you here?" Donna asked, sitting down next to me._

 _"This was March 28th, 1990. It was my 11th birthday." I answered._

 _"Are you continuing the story without us?" Emma asked as she came back with a tray of food and coffee._

 _"No, not at all." I told her. "I was just… never mind. Is everybody ready? I want to continue this story while I still can."_

 _My family gathered around me in the living room, wanting to hear more about the story._

 _"So, after that summer two years before, I was acting out more, knowing that my own father lied to me, that Mama Gem and Uncle John, lied to me. I was giving them attitude, and didn't want to follow their rules, but the truth was, I was heartbroken about it and Jax was the only one that new the truth. I told him everything. He wanted me to tell that I knew, but I made him swear he wouldn't tell anyone._

 _But I promised myself that I would confront them one day, but then Thomas took a hit for the worse. His heart was getting weaker." I said, thinking back on the day at the hospital._

* * *

 ** _March, 28th 1990._**

I always thought that if I just prayed hard enough and did my best for Thomas, he would be all right, that he would magically become better. But that wasn't the case. Just about a week ago, he collapsed at school when he was playing with his classmates. He was rushed to the hospital, but I wasn't allowed to see him. Only mediate family, and John and Mama Gem, wanted to spare me, seeing Thomas weak and vulnerable.

I woke up this morning, knowing what day it was, I was finally turning 11, but I couldn't be bothered to feel happy about it. I only had one wish.

I could hear voices outside my door. I just rolled my eyes, knowing it was Opie and Jax whispering about how they should surprise me with gifts and cake in bed.

"Oh, get going boys! She isn't getting any younger." I heard Piney say, or should I say my father?

They all opened the door busting through it at the same time.

"Happy birthday, Sophie!" They all yelled at the same time. Jax and Opie jumped into my bed, hugging me tightly.

"Thank you." I mumbled.

"Happy birthday, Soph." Piney said, also giving me a hug.

What really surprised me, was to see Gemma and John standing in the doorway with the rest of the club. Clay, Chibs, Bobby, Tig. Everyone was there.

"Hi, Mama Gem." I said, trying to show her a smile. Gemma sat down next to me in bed, moving my hair away from my face.

"Hi, baby girl. Happy birthday." Gemma told me and kissed my forehead.

Everyone put their gifts on my bed, but I just sat there staring at them. No one said anything, just looked at each other.

"Something wrong, Sweetheart?" Gemma asked. "Don't you like your gifts?"

"No, that's not it. I love them all, thank you so much. But there's only one thing I want for my birthday." I told them honestly.

"And what's that, lass?" Chibs asked with that heavy Scottish voice of his.

"I want to go see Thomas at the hospital." I answered quietly and everyone held their breath, not daring to speak, all looking at Gemma.

"Sweetie, I don't know." Gemma started to say.

"But he needs me. I need to make him feel better." I argued, wanting to see little Thomas.

"Maybe it's a good idea, Gem. You know how much she loves that kid." Clay said, taking a step forward. He kind of scared me, something didn't feel right about him.

"I'm just trying to protect her." Gemma argued.

"You are trying to protect yourself." John muttered under his breath.

"Please, I really want to see him." I pleaded. Gemma looked down at me, and she could tell that this was something I really wanted to do.

"Okay, baby girl. We'll go to the hospital. All of us." Gemma said and I hugged her tightly.

"Thank you, Mama Gem." I whispered.

"Go, get dressed kiddo." Piney said and I jumped out of the bed. I couldn't wait to see Thomas. Even though Jax was my best friend, Tommy was like my baby brother. I put on my best dress and brought my bear with me. I've decided that Thomas should get it. It always made me feel better.

When I walked out of the bathroom, the grownups stopped talking, taking in my appearance.

"You look wonderful, baby girl." Mama Gem said and smiled at me.

"Can we bring my birthday cake? I really want to share it with him." I asked hopefully.

"Of course, sweetheart." John said and picked up my cake. I was so glad that I was finally getting to see Thomas again.

I jumped into the car next to Jax, and he smiled and laughed for a change. He had been so serious since his brother was rushed to the hospital. Who can blame him?

"Are you okay?" I asked him quietly, trying not to caught the attention of Gemma and John.

"Yeah. At least I'm trying, you know…" Jax said with a shrug. "I'm afraid of what will happen to him."

I looked at my best friend, and it broke my heart that he felt this way. I grabbed his hand without thinking and laced our fingers together. Jax looked down at me in shock, and I think I saw him blushing, but he didn't remove his hand and we sat like that the whole way to the hospital. It felt good to sit like this, his touch was familiar and yet, completely new.

* * *

As the car stopped outside St. Thomas' Hospital, I eagerly jumped out of the car, at the same time as the club came to a holt on their bikes.

I bolted off into a run and was gone before anyone could even notice that I was missing. I ran through the doors of the hospital and I was in awe of the intensity of it.

"May I help you?" A woman asked me, knowing that I didn't belong here all by myself.

"Can you tell me where Thomas is?" I asked, thinking that it's all I need to say.

"Thomas, who?" The woman asked.

"Sophie!" I heard someone yell from behind me and I saw Gemma running through the doors. "Don't just take off like that."

"Sorry." I mumbled, feeling embarrassed.

"Oh, she's with you, Mrs. Teller." The woman stated, a little mean I thought.

"Yes. Is that a problem?" She asked in an intimidating voice.

"No, not at all." The woman said hastily.

"That's what I thought." Gemma spat, and I couldn't help but grin at the woman's face. It's so funny that others think that Mama Gem is so scary… she's like the nicest lady I know! I felt a little guilty about leaving them all behind.

"I'm sorry, Mama Gem." I said sadly.

"It's okay, sweetheart. But not again." Gemma said and I nodded. She grabbed my hand and we walked together towards Thomas' room. Just before Gemma opened the door, she looked down on me.

"What I need for you to remember now, baby, is that Tommy is really sick and he will have tubes sticking into him. It won't be pretty." Gemma told me.

I frowned at what she said.

"Well, can he talk?" I asked and Gemma looked strangely at me.

"Of course."

"Then, he's still Thomas to me." I told her firmly. I may only be 11 years old, but I do know how it works.

"Sometimes I wonder where you got that brain of yours." Gemma mumbled.

"Clearly, not from my father." I answered without thinking. Both Gemma and I froze. It's like Gemma understood that I already knew the truth, but I focused on the door. I wanted to see Tommy.

When the door opened, my eyes zoomed in on all the wires connected a machine. It was kind of scary.

"Sophie?" I heard from the bed in the middle of the room, surrounded by teddy bears and drawings. M drawings Mama Gem brought to him from me.

"Thomas!" I exclaimed and hurried over to him. I jumped onto the bed and hugged him tightly.

"I made this for you." Thomas said as he showed me a drawing he made.

"Pretty." I said.

"Happy birthday, Sophie." Thomas said and I couldn't help but smile.

"Thank you, Tommy." I answered, feeling much better about my birthday. Jax and Opie came in a few minutes later, and we talked and played with the action figures Opie brought with him. I thought it was a little boring. They could be such boys sometimes. Opie and Thomas had a little argument about which ninja turtle they were, Jax tapped my shoulder.

"I thought maybe you would want this." Jax whispered to me and showed me my 'Superstar Barbie.' I couldn't help but smile and feel something entirely different. My best friend in the whole world actually thought of me, and touched a girly toy.

"Thank you Jax." I said in a low voice.

"Anytime, Soph. Anytime." Jax said, caressing my back.

"Say cheese!" Mama Gem said and held up a camera. Thomas crawled over to me and wrapped his arms around me, giving us all a tired smile. Gemma snapped a few photos, promising she would bring one to have in Thomas' room.

"I think that it's time for us to give Thomas some peace and quiet." Gemma said, getting protests from the kids.

"Nooo, it's a few more minutes." Jax and Opie said with a groan.

"Sorry guys, we can come back a little while later." John said and the boys obeyed, jumping off the bed. I tried to leave, but Thomas wouldn't let go of me.

"No, don't leave yet!" Thomas cried and it broke my heart. Gemma wanted to argue but John stopped her.

"Why don't we go out and get ice cream with the boys, and when we come back, Sophie has to leave with us." John said.

"Yes, please Mama Gem, please!" I pleaded. I could tell she wanted to say no, but finally caved.

"Fine. You can stay." Gemma finally said and it made both of us so happy.

The others left and the room fell silent, the only sound was the beeping from the machine that helped his heart beating. I was so young; I didn't understand why it had to be like this. But I understood that this was bad.

"I want you to have this." I said, giving him my bear. Thomas wrapped his fragile hands around it and brought it to his chest.

"Thank you, Sophie. I love it." Thomas said and it pained me that he was this sick and that I couldn't fix him.

"I'm so sorry I couldn't fix you. I broke my promise to you." I said, trying not to cry.

"You made me feel better." Thomas said, laying down on his bed. "I feel better now, maybe it's not so bad. Maybe I won't get badder."

This little boy was so brave, and he was one of my best friends. I couldn't see my life without him.

"Yeah, maybe you won't." I whispered.

"Hey, Sophie? Promise me you'll always be friends with my brother and come visit me again?" Thomas asked starting to get tired.

"I promise you I will." I answered intent on keeping that promise.

* * *

I broke that promise about visit him again….

Just a week later, little Thomas Teller died of heart failure, clutching my teddy bear and with his parents by his side. It was a huge mess from then on out.

Jax was inconsolable. I have never seen anyone crying as much as he did and it broke my heart. I was sad too, but I needed to be there for Jax and stay strong for him. He needed his best friend right now, not a complete mess.

John and Gemma had a very hard time, after losing Thomas. I guess it must be very hard, losing a child.

Jax stayed with me, most of the time. His parents argued a lot and he couldn't stand being in the same room as them and I would listen and not judge him for lashing out, getting angry.

Opie also stepped up, and the three of us, tried to get through this together. I haven't even shed a tear since they told me about it. It's not that I'm not sad, but I'm in shock, so I shut down, and decided to do my best to help those around me.

It was the night before Thomas' funeral, and I couldn't sleep and kept tossing and turning. Suddenly, a tap on my window, scared me half to death. Jax stood there in the three outside my window and I jumped out of bed to let him in.

"What are you doing here? It's the middle of the night." I whispered under my breath as he stepped into my room. He looked so broken, his eyes were swollen from crying and he looked so fragile. I wrapped my arms around him, to give him a hug.

"Ma and dad are fighting again. They've done nothing but fight ever since…" Jax started to say, but he couldn't say his name right now.

"Oh, Jax. I'm so sorry." I said feeling sad for him. "Do you want me to get Opie?"

Jax only shook his head.

"No, I want to stay here with you." He whispered and I let him stay. We laid in bed together, no one saying anything, just looking at each other.

"Have you thought about when you'll let Opie and Piney know that you know the truth about Piney being your real dad?" Jax asked suddenly. I knew he wanted me to tell them soon.

"No. I don't know how to bring it up. But I know I need to do it soon." I answered with a sigh.

"You're my best friend, you know that right?" Jax asked with a whisper.

"And you're my best friend and you'll always will be." I said back before taking his hand. We fell asleep like that. And when we woke up in the morning, we had a difficult day in front of us. The day we dreaded the most.

* * *

The thing that woke me in the morning, was someone's hushed voices.

"He came here during the night." Opie said in a whisper. I heard them talking but I didn't go in here. I turned my head and looked directly at Gemma.

"Hi, baby. How is he?" Gemma asked gently. I turned to look at the sleeping boy next to me, still clutching onto my hand.

"I think he's ok. He cried a lot but…" I said with a yawn.

"Sophie, what's going on?" We heard Jax said tiredly.

"Your mom is here." I said looking over at Gemma.

"Hey, Ma." Jax said, stretching out in bed.

"Hi, baby. You scared me when I didn't find you in bed this morning." Gemma said softly, walking towards my bed.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to, I just needed to get out, you know." Jax told his mother.

"It's okay, sweetheart. I'm glad you came here." Gemma reassured him. Jax got out of bed and hugged his mother. I think they both needed that.

Let's get some breakfast and then go to the clubhouse. We're staying there tonight, everybody." Gemma said and we just nodded.

After my shower, I joined the others in the kitchen. Mary was making food for everyone, with the help from Gemma. Mary came over to me and slammed the plate right in front of me.

"Try not to make a mess of your clothes." She hissed at me. She still disliked me very much. If what I heard a few years ago was true, that could be the reason to why I was never good enough for her.

"Would it kill you to be a little nice to her today of all days? She loved that little boy." Piney said to her, but I didn't want any arguing today.

"It's okay, Piney. She has a point." I said quickly.

Piney looked like he wanted to say something, but stopped himself. At this point, they were starting to get scared for me. They know I haven't cried and that eventually, I would snap. I was careful with my food and finished as quickly as I could.

"Can I drive with you to the club house?" I asked Mama Gem and she just smiled at me.

"Of course, baby. Let's go."

The car ride over the club house seemed longer than usual. In some way, it was. Jax didn't speak or anything, but he never let go of my hand though. I loved coming to the club. The Sons of Anarchy was my family and I would do anything for them. I was closest to Gemma and John, but I never got too old to sit on Chibs' lap. He was like my uncle and I loved him very much.

When the car came to a holt, Chibs and the others waited for us outside the clubhouse.

"Hey lassie, how are you?" Chibs asked and gave me a hug.

"I've been better, but I'm okay, I guess." I said with a sigh. Chibs wrapped an arm around my shoulders and walked with me inside the clubhouse.

"You know, I think I saw an ice cream Sunday with your name on it." Bobby said from the bar.

"Thank you, Bobby." I said, not wanting to turn it down. Everyone looked so serious and it was suffocating me.

Jax, Opie and I stayed close together, trying to keep the talk light but it was rather difficult. We just wanted this day over with.

"Let's go." John said with an unspoken authority and we all followed him. I grabbed onto Jax's hand again as we walked out of the clubhouse and headed for the cemetery.

* * *

When we finally arrived, I noticed that Mama Gem barely held it together. It was so much sorrow and I hated it. When we reached his coffin and it looked so small. Too small for someone to be buried in. Thomas never liked small spaces. Something that made me a little calmer, was the thought of my old teddy bear being in the coffin with him. The bear was with him when he died and I wanted them to rest together. It made me feel a little better. Jax and I looked at each other and I could see the tears in his eyes. We both looked over at Gemma and she was shaking. Without saying anything, both Jax and I walked up to Gemma and grabbed onto her hands. She looked down at the both of us and brought us closer to her side.

The ceremony was beautiful in its own way. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful spring day. Thomas would've loved it.

Gemma motioned for me to step forward and place my rose on his coffin. I tried not to make my hands shake too bad. I kissed the rose and closed my eyes.

"I'm sorry I couldn't make you better." I whispered under my breath before placing the rose on his coffin. "I miss you."

I turned to walk back to the others and Chibs waited there with his arms open. I think it broke Piney's heart that I would turn to Chibs instead of him, but I didn't care.

* * *

When the ceremony was over, we all returned to the clubhouse to have the wake for Tommy. I mainly kept myself close to Jax, because he was a mess. We mostly stayed in one of the small apartments in the back of the club, wanting to be alone.

"How are you doing, Jax?" I asked quietly after a while.

"I'll be alright. It's just hard, you know." Jax answered. "But how are you holding up? I haven't seen you cry once since it happened."

At first, I didn't know what to say.

"It's just… If I start to cry, I don't think I'll be able to stop, and the last thing you need, is me falling apart and all of you have to comfort me." I told him honestly.

"Sophie… it's okay to grieve." Opie said and I could slowly felt myself falling apart. Loud voices snapped me out of it, and I recognized the voices of Piney and Mary, fighting about something. My guess is that they've been drinking.

We opened the door, only to hear the voices even louder.

"I don't care about her! Ship her back to that whore of a mother for all I care!" Mary shouted.

"Shut up, Mary." Piney yelled back at her.

"Why should I?" Mary asked narrowing her eyes. "I should never have said yes to keeping her in the first place! She's nothing but a liability, because you couldn't keep it in your pants!"

I could feel the anger, sadness, the pain in my chest became worse by the second. I knew that I would burst at any second, and when I did, no one would imagine what I would say.

"Stop it!" I finally yelled, making everyone stop talking and yelling at each other. "Just stop, both of you!"

"Why can't you just stop fighting!" I asked them, finally feeling the tears burn in my eyes. "If me being Piney's daughter is too much for you, then send me away. I don't want to stay with you anymore! We just buried Tommy, and still, you can't show respect to that. Even I know better, and I'm only 11!"

"I hate all of you!" I screamed and ran away from all of them. No one said anything, and I think it's because everyone was in shock. I finally told everyone that I knew about Piney being my father. I ran back towards the apartments but instead of going in there, I stopped at the latter, going up to the roof. John once told me that it was a great place to think. I sat down on the roof, finally letting my tears fall freely. For the first time in over a week, I cried. I cried about my messed up family, I cried about feeling unwanted and I cried because of Tommy.

Little Tommy Teller who was only 6 years old. No one should die that young.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I chanted over and over again. "I'm so sorry I couldn't fix you."

There was no stopping the tears, not anymore.

I don't know how long I sat there, but I tensed up when I finally felt huge arms wrap around

me. I looked up and saw Piney sitting there next to me.

"I am so sorry, kiddo. I never meant for this to happen." Piney told me and he was on the verge of tears himself.

"Why couldn't you just be honest with me? Telling me that I'm your daughter, and not someone you took in." I cried, letting all my frustration go.

"I don't know, sweetheart. I freaked out when she told me that she was pregnant with you. And she told me that she didn't want me to have anything to do with you. But after you were born, she had second thoughts and she came over one day, saying that she couldn't take care of a baby and left." Piney told me and I cried even harder.

"The second I saw your face; I fell in love with you. You were the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. I couldn't send you away." Piney told me as he stroked my hair.

"But why didn't you tell me the truth?" I asked through my sobs.

"Mary… I begged her to forgive me, and the only way she would allow you to stay, was that she would never act like your mother. She never liked you. At the time, I was desperate, and I did as she asked. But not anymore. You are my daughter and I love you with all of my heart and I will not let anyone convince you otherwise." Piney said, hugging me tighter. I didn't even answer him. I just cried and hoped that things would get better from now on.

* * *

After a while, the two of us walked down the latter only to be met by the entire club. Everyone was worried about me and it warmed my heart. I looked at the crowd and finally, my eyes landed on Gemma and John. I felt that my outburst had hurt them the most.

"Are you alright, sweetheart?" Mama Gem asked me.

"I'm sorry for yelling at everyone." I said with a small voice.

"No, baby. Don't do this to yourself. You had every right. And it's okay to be sad." Gemma told me and I ran over to her and hugged her tightly, not being able to stop crying.

"I'm so sorry." I said, only the word to be muffled by me pressing my face into her neck. I needed this, I needed to cry with her. Mama Gem was right; it is okay to cry. You don't have to be strong and tough all the time.

After everyone calmed down a little, things became better. Jax stayed with me and Opie and we had a lot to talk about. It was a shock for Opie to finally learn the truth about me being Piney's real daughter, but he thought it was cool as well. Opie fell asleep on the floor of all things, so Jax and I couldn't help but laugh at him. He looked so corny. It felt good to laugh, even though it was a sad day.

"Hey, Sophie? I'm really glad I had you today and I love you for it." Jax whispered and gave me that Teller-killing smile. It actually made my heart skip a beat and it made me blush. We just sat there, staring at each other for a minute without saying anything to each other.

"Would it be okay if I kissed you? I've always wanted you to be my first kiss." Jax said suddenly and I wasn't sure if I heard him correctly.

"Why would you want to kiss me?" I asked nervously.

"Well, because you're my best friend, and I love you." Jax argued and cocked his eyebrow at me.

"Oh… yeah. O…okay then." I answered not quite sure why I said yes. It was kind of awkward. I didn't know how to do this.

"On the count of three?" Jax suggested and all I could to was nod.

"One, two, three!" We said at the same time, and we connected our lips in a quick, awkward kiss. But it didn't stop me from seeing firework in my mind. We couldn't help but laugh quietly from what we just did.

"I am going to marry you one day." Jax said but I just called him stupid. We would never get married.

From that day on, we both knew that things would change between us, we just didn't want to admit it to each other, for a long time to come.

* * *

 ** _Oberlin, Ohio, Year 2064._**

 _"Wow, grandma. You kissed grandpa when you were only 11? Gross… it's like my age. I would never kiss a girl!" Harry exclaimed. Harry really was the baby of the group, being a happy surprise for Abel and his wife when she was 40 and Abel 44. Harry is now 12 and Donna, she wasn't that happy about being 13 when he was born. The middle child, Macy, was 8 at the time, but is now away at college, studying art._

 _"Oh grow up, will you, you little snot-monster!" Donna snapped, wiping away a few tears after the story of how Thomas died and that made me tear up as well. That girl was too much like me, it was scary._

 _"I think it's romantic, falling in love with your best friend at that early age." She said, daydreaming away for some time._

 _"Ah, yes. But it wasn't like a fairytale. It would still be a long time, before we would actually confess our feelings for each other, Jax and I, but let's not get ahead of ourselves. First, there's sadly someone else we need to say goodbye to before we get to that part."_

 _"Wait, Emma, my second oldest child interrupted. "Are you saying that Thomas' passing isn't the only sad part?"_

 _"I wish I could tell you yes, Emma, but sadly, the next part in this story isn't much better. Like I said; it was the worst three years of our lives." I told them, thinking about the next thing to happen, that would change our lives forever._

* * *

 ** _November 11th, 1993._**

I wish I could say that things got better after Thomas died, three and a half years ago. But by saying that, I would be lying. Things got worse. John and Gemma was falling apart, John was depressed and it was a hard time for all of us.

I could sense something was up with the Teller family. Gemma and Clay grew closer to each other, everyone could see that, John could see that, but it was as if he didn't even care that his wife was cheating on him with Clay. I'm not sure if Jax knew. I couldn't tell him without being sure. John came to me a few nights ago, telling me he had a special gift for me. He told me that he wanted me to take care of something for him, and show it to Jax when the time was right, if I felt as if he had lost his way or if the club was in trouble somehow. It turned out to be a book of some sorts.

"I know it's a huge burden for you, Sophie, but you're the only one I can trust to do right by Jax, because I know how much you love him." John told me the day he gave me that. I wanted to deny the love part, but John wouldn't fall for it. He could tell that I was head over heels for my best friend.

"I promise you, I will take care of it." I told John. If I had only known that it would've been the last time I would ever speak to him. I would have said more.

* * *

Jax and Opie was now 15, and gets more and more handsome by the day. He and I was as close as ever, but he clearly forgot his comment to me from three years back, about marrying me someday. He just told me a few months ago, about this girl he met when he started High School and her name was Tara. I couldn't tell him what I felt about him now. He was too caught up in Tara-land. But I still loved him and I would be there for him as a friend. I promised Thomas I would.

Jax, Opie and I was working on an old car together. I thought it was fun to get my hands dirty and help the boys at the Auto Shop. It was a day like any other days. Everyone was working, John and Gemma arguing in the office, nothing new.

I watched as John stormed out of the office, saying something about picking something up in Lodi, and left on his bike without saying anything else. Something about watching him leave like that, made my heart pound a little. Something told me that something bad was about to happen. I just didn't know what.

"Hey, Soph… Are you okay, doll?" Jax asked, he could sense me being distracted even though he was working on the undercarriage of the car, not seeing my face.

"Yeah, I guess. I just have that feeling, you know." I said with a shrug.

"Ah, come on sis. You can't just have a bad feeling. It doesn't work that way." Opie said, popping the hood of the car.

"If you say so." I said with a sigh.

Things between me and my family, was a little different now. Piney and Mary was going through a divorce but his relationship with me, is getting better. Mary still don't like me very much, and her relationship with Opie, is strained because of it. So all in all, I couldn't complain. It was good to know that my family had my back. I just wanted to know more about my biological mother. Did she live in Charming? Did she ever try to look me up? Was she even alive?

The sound of sirens brought me out of my thoughts. At least three police cars and two ambulances hurried past our front gates, speeding away.

We all looked at each other, not knowing what could've happened, but we didn't think much of it. Not until about two hours later, when Mama Gem came running out of the office with Clay. No doubt about them fucking each other's brains out.

"Jackson!" Gemma called, and we all knew it was serious, because no one called Jax by his full name.

"What, Ma?" Jax said, standing up from under the car.

"It's your father. He's in the hospital." Gemma explained and everything froze. Jax looked back at me with a horrid look on his face.

"We need to get to St. Thomas' Hospital, right now." Clay said and we all dropped everything. This couldn't be happening; John couldn't be hurt. John never gets hurt.

Gemma jumped into the car, with me Opie and Jax who wasn't old enough to ride a bike yet, and rushed to the hospital. Jax clutched onto my hand, wanting to feel me near him. I felt my heart flutter and cheeks flush, but I suppressed it and thought about what would meet us when we arrived at the hospital.

All of us, rushed inside the hospital, making a lot of noise as we went. Everyone in Charming knew who The Sons of Anarchy was.

Gemma was the one to go talk to the doctors, and Jax felt helpless. This was his father and he couldn't do anything about it. I tried my best to help him at the same time as I battled my tears.

"He's going to be okay, Jax." I tried to reassure him. "He's John fucking Teller. He won't die from a biker accident."

Jax looked at me and tried to smile, but I knew it was hard for him. Gemma came back a little while later, tears pouring down her face and we braced ourselves for the news.

"He's in pretty bad shape. He hit a semi-truck head on and was dragged under it." Gemma explained and everyone either gasped, cursed or yelled. Or did everything at once.

"He's in surgery right now, but I don't know if he'll make it. They'll let us know in a few hours." Gemma told us and I was in complete shock.

Jax looked as if he would collapse, so I did my best to support him. This wasn't happening again. Somehow, I managed to get Jax to sit down, keeping my arms around him.

"How did this happen? He's such a good biker. How could he just crash like that?" Jax said, not understanding how this happened to his father.

"I don't know Jax, I don't know." I answered, not knowing what else to say.

"We'll figure it out, sweetheart." Gemma said, sitting down on the other side of him.

* * *

We sat there, waiting for what felt like hours. Jax didn't say anything but stayed close to me. He looked so tired.

"Hey. Maybe you should try and get some sleep." I said softly.

"I'm not leaving the hospital." Jax shot back at me. I know he didn't mean it, so it didn't affect me.

"I know that. I'm not saying you should leave. I'm saying you should get some sleep." I told him. "We're probably going to be here all night anyway. I'll wake you up if there's any news?"

Jax suddenly looked exhausted and he looked grateful.

"Thank you, Sophie." Jax said.

"You're welcome." I said softly as he settled himself with his head in my lap and his feet propped up on his mother's lap. I couldn't help but comb my fingers through his blond locks, trying to give him some kind of comfort.

It didn't take long for Jax to fall asleep but I didn't stop absentmindedly playing with his hair.

I didn't even notice Mama Gem observing me.

"You know. Sometimes, it's easy to forget how young you really are." Gemma said with a hoarse voice and I turned to look at her.

"I mean, you're barely teenagers and you've been through so much, and you've been force to grow up sooner than others. And sometimes, you forget that." Gemma told me, smiling sadly as she did.

"That's life, I guess and it's our way of living. All I know that this is my family, and if that means I must grow up sooner than others, then so be it." I said softly, not wanting to wake Jax up. "Besides, Jax need me, so I would never abandon that."

"You really love him, don't you?" Gemma stated more than asked.

"Of course, I love him. He's my best friend." I answered as if it wasn't a big deal. Gemma looked at me intently for what felt like forever, before breaking into a smile.

"Of course you do." Gemma looked smug, like she knew something I didn't.

Opie came over to me with something to drink, sitting down next to us.

"How's he doing?" Opie whispered, looking down at his best friend.

"Honestly, I don't know, but no matter what happens, we'll be there for him." I said, drinking a little.

"Yeah. We're a family, all of us." Opie said and we looked over the entire waiting area. Club members from all over the states had shown up to show their support to the injured President of the first 9 of Sons of Anarchy.

"Yes, we are. But I'm afraid what will come of this club, if John doesn't make it." I whispered to my brother.

"That won't happen. I won't allow it." Opie whispered back to me.

We sat there a few more hours, before the surgeon finally came through the doors towards the waiting room. I figured it was time to wake Jax up.

"Jax, the surgeon is coming." I said softly, waking Jax up. He jolted awake, looking at me with a surprised expression.

"What?" He asked sitting up.

"The surgeon is on his way." I repeated gesturing to the tired doctor coming our way. Jax jumped onto his feet at the same time as his mother and rushed over to the doctor to get the news. Opie and I followed in their tracks, wanting to get to know what's going on.

The news the doctor gave us was not good. The injuries were so severe; his brain had stopped functioning. He was declared braindead. The machines were breathing for him, but the man we knew as John Teller, was gone.

I was completely in shock. He couldn't be gone; John Teller couldn't die. Gemma broke down in hysterical sobs and the others just stood there, not knowing what to do. Jax held onto his mother tightly as he let his tears fall freely. Opie brought me in for a hug, and it felt nice to be in the arms of my brother.

Clay came over and took care of Gemma, showing her comfort. Jax looked over at me and I walked over to him, telling him how sorry I was about everything. Jax held onto me like I was some sort of lifeline, squeezing me so tightly, I thought I would suffocate.

I don't know how long I was standing there like that with him, but we were interrupted by a high screeching voice. We both knew it was Tara, and she came running towards us. Jax looked up but still didn't let me go.

"I came as soon as I heard." Tara said and practically pushed me away from Jax's arms to replace me. It was no secret that Tara didn't like me being this close with Jax. She basically hated me. Opie had to steady me so I wouldn't fall to the floor.

Gemma saw this and she narrowed her eyes it. She thought Tara was a conniving little bitch. Even though the girl was only 15 years old.

I tried not be affected by it and moved over to Gemma to show her that she wasn't alone.

* * *

Two days, it took two days for John's body to give up. After two days, Gemma and Jax decided that they would take him off life-support.

It was a hard time for everyone, especially the Teller family. The funeral was just a few days later and the club was packed with people, never a time to spend time alone.

Tara was all over Jax, making it difficult for me to help Jax, being there for him. I didn't want to try and make this about myself, but it was hard, not being helpful.

I did my best though. I helped Gemma the best way I could. Helped her with laundry, grocery shopping, or whatever she needed help with.

That night, after the funeral, people were drinking, in the honor of John Teller. I couldn't see Jax anywhere and Tara had already left for the night, not wanting to disobey her parents by staying out too late.

I walked back to the apartments, looking for Jax. I found him sitting on the bed, with his face in his hands.

"Jax? Are you okay?" I asked softly. He looked up at me, feeling relieved that it was me.

"Honestly, no." He said, tears stinging his eyes.

I sat down next to him, looking down at my lap.

"I'm sorry all of this has happened Jax. I never wanted this for you. For you to lose your brother and your father." I said, not being able to look at him.

"I love you for being here for me, though." Jax said tilting my chin up so he could look into my eyes.

"I love you too, Jax. Always." I whispered.

Without hesitation, he kissed me again. The last time he did, was when I was 11, after Thomas' funeral.

"What are you doing, Jax?" I whispered, breaking the kiss.

"I just… I don't want to be alone tonight." Jax said, his eyes never leaving mine. He looked so broken, so misplaced, like he needed someone to forget the pain. And let's face it, I loved him. So, before I could even comprehend what I did, I said:

"Okay, Jax. I'll stay." I whispered and I let him kiss me again. It felt like I was in heaven, having him giving me the attention I so desperately craved. When he removed my shirt, my mind went completely blank.

* * *

I don't think I knew what was happening until it was over. I laid in bed, looking up at the ceiling, thinking about that I'd just lost my virginity to my best friend, at the age of 14. We were each other's first. I looked over at Jax, who had already fallen asleep, keeping his arm over my waist. I was afraid to move, afraid to breath. I didn't understand what just happened. It all felt weird. My body ached, especially my lady parts. I am pretty sure I was bleeding but I didn't dare to move. In his sleep, Jax brought me closer to me, as if he was protecting me. I finally relaxed more and drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, I woke up alone in bed. Jax was long gone, and I don't know what to feel. My body was incredibly sore and like I suspected, there was blood on the sheets. I panicked and ripped the sheets off the bed. I didn't want anyone to see them, at least not my dad.

I stuffed them in a bag before jumping into the shower. How was I supposed to even look at Jax ever again?

After my shower, I got dressed and walked out of the room, trying to hide the bag with the bloody sheets. People were either still sleeping, or gone to work.

I cursed myself that I had to walk across the yard to get to the dumpster. Everyone looked like they were busy with their own things and luckily didn't notice me. I managed to reach the dumpster and open the lid.

"Hey sweetheart. Whatcha doing?" I heard a voice from behind me, and I froze. I turned around and looked straight at Gemma.

"I uh… just throwing away some trash, that's all." I said stuttering a little.

"Now why don't I believe you." Gemma said and took the bag away from me.

"No, Gemma. Please don't." I begged her. When she saw the sheets, her whole expression changed.

"Oh, Sophie. What did you do?" Gemma asked me under her breath.

"I, uh… I'm so sorry. Jax wanted me to stay and I didn't know what was happening." I said and started to cry. Gemma saw how torn up about this I was.

"Oh, sweetheart. Everything will be okay, I promise." Gemma said and hugged me tightly. I was glad that Gemma wasn't angry with me, instead, she helped me. Gemma brought me into her office, so we could talk and it made me feel a lot better.

"So, what does this mean for Jax and you?" Gemma asked, thinking of Tara.

"I don't know. I don't know anything anymore." I said with a sigh, still feeling a little sore.

"Well, let's take it one step of the time, yes?" Gemma suggested and I agreed.

I walked out of the office, wanting to find something to eat. As I reached the club house, I could hear voices. I walked in and found Jax and Tara, sitting by the bar, eating lunch, laughing and kissing each other. I could feel my heart break and it didn't look like Jax didn't think twice about what happened between us last night. I slowly walked out of the clubhouse and walked towards the Auto shop again, trying not to shed anymore tears. It was my choice to sleep with Jax. I shouldn't be all this upset. I unlocked the garage no one had used since they brought back the parts of John's old bike. The parts looked useless but John had taught me a thing or two about fixing bikes so I decided I wanted to rebuilt it in John's honor. I started with mapping out the pieces of it and scattered them all over the floors.

The others must have heard the noises and came through the door soon enough.

"What are you doing, lassie?" Chibs asked, looking at me with concern.

I'm rebuilding John's bike. I want to do something nice in his honor." I said through my tears. The others looked at each other and before I knew it, they all joined in to help me.

This was our way to pay our last respect to our fallen President.

As for Jax and myself, things were about to get even more complicated.

* * *

 ** _Oberlin, Ohio, Year 2064._**

 _"Jesus, Ma… I did not need to know when you lost your virginity!" Abel groaned after hearing about his parents having sex._

 _"Stop being such a baby!" I said._

 _"14 is a very young age, grandma." Donna said, feeling bad for me._

 _"Yes, baby, I know, but that's how it was. Nothing I would do could change that." I told her._

 _"You didn't get pregnant, did you?" Jackie asked, worried that I might have been._

 _"Oh, no. I was lucky enough that I didn't. But I could've been." I told her reassuringly._

 _"What about Tara. She sure sounds like a bitch." Harry said, but this time, no one said anything about it._

 _"Well, Jax went into a spiral after John's death. He and Tara would get into all sorts of problems, getting arrested for minor things. Jax got more involved with the club, and by the time he turned 19, Tara left town, because she had enough of this life. And that made things even worse for Jax. We never talked about what happened between us, but I still stayed as his friend." I told them._

 _"So, what happened after that?" Emma asked._

 _"Well, my dear…" I said, taking a deep breath._

 _This is where our story actually starts._

* * *

 **Wow, there it is.**

 **So I place both funerals in one chapter instead of two. I think it works that way.**

 **I know 14 is young to lose your virginity, but that happens sometimes. And so I chose to do it like this in this story. I know Sophie doesn't seem like a strong character at the moment, but she'll get out of her shell, and just keep in mind that she no older than 14 in this chapter. She will get older and bolder as the time goes on.**

 **And to be honest, I don't know much about Auto shops, cars or bikes. I'm just trying my best.**

 **Until next time!**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***india-guest: I am doing fine, thank you. Hope you're enjoying this story.**

 ***SOAROCKS: That's good to know, hope you enjoyed this!**

 *** : Thank yo so much! Here's the update for you!**

 ***bethie86: Thank you so much. So glad you didn't have to wait too long to read another one!**

 ***cbrienza: Thank you! Here it is!**

 ***RisingPhoenix75: Thank you for stumbling onto this story. Hope you liked the chapter!**

 ***naviskyy: Here is another update. I surprised myself with how quickly I wrote this.**

 ***Mookey0410: Thank you so much! Glad you liked it.**


	4. I will Always Return

**Here's the newest chapter of the story.**

 **It's now the story truly begin. I went a little overboard with the lenght of this chapter, but it didn't feel right to cut it in half.**

 **So, a lot of things happens in this chapter, and I hope you'll enjoy this. Like I said in the last chapter; I will not writing the time jump between Sophie as young and old. That will return when the story comes to an end.**

 ** _I do not own "SOA" only my OC._**

 **Read, review and enjoy!**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 **I Will Always Return**

I wish I could tell you that things got better during the years after John's death. That would be a lie.

Clay was vote as the new President of the Sons, and he had his own vision about the club and I wasn't entirely on board with it, but if Gemma was happy, I was okay with things.

I decided after high school to stay in town, and go to college one town away, so I could stay in Charming. Ever since I felt helpless with not being able to fix Thomas, I wanted to do something in his honor. So, I managed to start my own organization that mainly co-worked with a team of doctors who dedicated their lives to research heart diseases related to children. I decided to call it

 **'A Heart for Children'.**

And I worked closely with the local hospital, had a few charity events every year with the help from Gemma and the Sons. It was a lot of work, but I had good workers, and volunteers. In my spare time, I read to the children that's currently living in the hospital due to different diseases. I also had a medical degree, so occasionally, I get called up by the club to come down to the clubhouse to patch up some of the members. Mainly Tig.

I swear, that man only thinks with the wrong head and gets himself into situations you really don't want to know anything about.

In the last 15 years, things changed. Jax and I never talked much about what happened between us, losing our virginities to each other. But still, we remained friends, even after Tara ran out of town when Jax was 19. She wanted more in life and wanted Jax with him, but he didn't want to leave Charming. I stayed his friend but it was hard. I loved the club and I loved him, but I kept a distance between us, mainly to protect my heart.

Jax went in and out of jail at minor charges, but he always got out after a few months, and as the VP of the club, his loyalty stayed within the club.

* * *

Opie and I grew even closer over the years and I met his future wife and my future best friend, Donna in college. I played matchmaker and they got married when Donna and I graduated college in 2001. The twins where two at the time. I love Kenny and Ellie with all my heart and they mean everything to me. And all creds to Donna, having twins when she was twenty and finishing college at the same time.

And right after the twins turned 4, a run went bad and Opie took the fall for that, leaving Donna alone with the kids for the next 5 years. I couldn't stand watching this happen to my sister-in-law, so I promised my brother that I would be there for her and the kids. So I moved in with them, and for the next five years, I stayed away from the club, knowing that Donna didn't need me running around for the club. Gemma understood my place and helped occasionally.

Jax, on the other hand, didn't agree with me stepping down from being their personal doctor/ nurse and stay out of the family for so long. Like he said, he needed his best friend and Donna and the kids are family, but Jax didn't understand that Donna needed some time away from the club with her children.

I did hear from him from time to time though. Maybe he stopped by so he could see how we held up, with Opie in jail, and he went with me when I went to visit him. But it wasn't like it used to, but I think, that's what I needed.

Especially after I found out he married some girl, who turned out to be a junkie and then he divorced her, only to reconcile with her again… And what do you know, he got her pregnant. That put even a bigger strain on our relationship, and I was beginning to feel that the promise I made to Thomas 18 years ago, was harder and harder to keep.

A few weeks after Opie got out of jail, he made it clear that he would respect Donna's wishes and stayed out of the club and got a legit job, instead of doing dirty work for the club, I supported him in doing so, but I still kept in touch with the club. They needed their medicine woman. And they never let me forget it.

After college, I bought my own little house with the help from my father. I was so proud to own something by myself and when I moved in with Donna and the kids, I rented it out to a small family, struggling to keep a home, so I offered the man of the house a job within my organization, and the wife, I got her a job as a receptionist at St. Thomas' Hospital. Now that I'm all done with living with Opie and Donna, I got my house back, and the residents finally had the money to buy their own house, meaning, I could get mine back.

I really missed my house. It was close to everything. The hospital, the club, the center of our small town.

* * *

I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. I looked at the clock seeing it's only midnight. I know, I'm an early sleeper. I groan and flip my phone open.

 _"Whoever this is, I am going to kneecap for bringing me out of my slumber_!" I growled into the phone.

 ** _"Is that really how you talk to your father?"_** The voice on the other line said with a laugh.

 _"Sorry, dad. What's up?"_ I asked, yawning as loud as I could.

 ** _"We need your assistance down at the club. A few minor injuries."_**

 ** _"What the fuck did Tig do this time?"_** I asked, getting out of bed.

 ** _"Oh, you know… fighting in the ring gone wrong. His opponent needs some stiches."_** My dad answered and I couldn't help but let out a sigh.

 _"Fine. I'll be there in about 30 minutes."_ I told him.

 ** _"Thank you, sweetheart. I love you."_**

 _"Love you too, dad."_ I said, hanging up the phone.

It's been a while since I went to the clubhouse like this. I really kept my word to Donna and declined all club business.

The town of Charming was calm this time of night. Or, it wasn't that late. I fell asleep around 9pm, it's hard working as much as I do. With the organization and the volunteering with the children in the hospital.

I drove down the familiar roads towards the clubhouse, knowing that they would be full on partying by now. I could hear music before I even stopped my car, and I let out a sigh.

"They never change." I muttered under my breath. I was suddenly nervous that I would see Jax. I haven't seen him in a few months, not after I found out that he knocked up Wendy.

As I stepped out of the car, I could hear them cheering for me.

"Heads up, boys! SAMCRO's Princess is finally returning home!" Chibs cheered for me and gave me a big hug.

"How are you, lassie?" Chibs asked me, smelling like alcohol.

"Tired. Been staying in the NICU all day. Helping parents who needs it, having conversations with them." I said, thinking back on those scared parents, not knowing what to do with their situation.

That's rough, lass." Chibs said and wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"Yeah… Now, where's the injured?" I asked, wanting to get this over with and that's when I saw it. The poor prospect, sitting there with a spilt open fist.

"How on earth did he managed that?" I asked, examining the prospect's hand.

"I kinda went for it blindly and smashed my hand against the wall." The boy in front of me said and I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

"Really, Tig? You had to duck." I said, looking at the man leaning against the wall with a smug smile on his face.

"Anything to see you in here again, doll." Tig told me and it hit me that they've all missed me being around here.

"So, are you a croweater or something?" The prospect asked and it hit me how new he really was. Tig slapped the back of his head.

"No, you fucking idiot! That's Piney's daughter, you Jackass!" Tig told him.

"How could I know that!" the prospect argued back.

"Okay, Chibs, take Tig away from here, I work better alone." I told him and Chibs nodded.

"Whatever you say, lassie." Chibs answered and pushed Tig in front of him into the clubhouse. "Oh… and don't go without saying goodbye, Princess. We haven't seen you for a long time, and we've missed you."

"Okay." I replied without turning around. I wiped the prospect's hand with an alcohol-free wipe, to clean his wound. I could tell he flinched a little.

"Don't be such a baby. I need to clean it to see if you in fact need stiches." I told him firmly.

"Sorry. Sorry for calling you a croweater by the way. You totally don't look like one." The prospect said.

"It's okay. I'm Sophie." I said with a smile.

"Half-sack. My name's Half-sack." The boy said quickly and it made me look up at him.

"Half-sack? How did you earn that nickname?" I asked but quickly spoke again. "Never mind, I don't want to know. What's your real name?"

"Kip. You can call me Kip."

"Well, nice to meet you, Kip, and the good news is that you don't need stiches, but you'll need to be careful and not get an infection. So I will be back tomorrow to replace your dressings. And just a heads up… when Tig gets too tried, he'll always duck left, so you be sure to give him a right hook instead." I told Kip, ruffling his hair. For some reason, I just had to do it. Kip started to blush and laugh.

"Hey, Kip. I know Chibs told me to come inside, but cover for me and say that I had to leave?" I asked him and Kip nodded.

"Good. I'll see you tomorrow, Kip and keep that hand clean!" I said firmly before reaching my car.

* * *

I drove down the road and decided to stop and get something to drink. The little shop on the street corner was still open so it wouldn't be a problem.

I walked into the store, with a ding and a tumble. Yes, I am a little clumsy sometimes.

"Hey, Louise." I said with a wave. She was a beautiful girl in her early twenties. Oh, how I wish to be that age and not almost 30.

"Hey, Sophie. Out late today?" The girl asked with a smile.

"Yeah. Had to take care of something for my father. Do you still have any sodas left?" I asked.

"There should be more in the fridge in the back of the store. I saved a bag of chips for you as well. I had a feeling I might run into you soon." Louise told me.

"Ah! You're an angel, sweetheart!" I said, moving back into the store. I found a magazine and couldn't help but go through it, and that when I heard the door opened. I looked up and saw the one person I wasn't too keen on meeting tonight.

His blond hair waved backwards due to riding without a helmet, those blue eyes twinkled with playfulness and spunk. He was a lady's man, he had a killer smile that made every girl swoon, including me. He was my best friend, I would do everything for him, I love him.

Jax Teller.

He hadn't seen me yet though and I had to go past him to get out. I was fucked. It didn't get any better when Louise started to flirt with Jax. I don't blame her for trying though. He is very handsome and I missed him.

I debated it for a while, and concluded that I should at least try and talk to him. I saw him picking up a pack of condoms and I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

"You know, you can buy those by the case." I started to say and I could see that he started to smile and turned towards me. "Be a lot cheaper."

"Nah. A box at a time keeps me humble." Jax answered and walked towards me.

"Hey, Sophie." He said with that smile I fell in love with.

"Hey, Jax. I've missed you." I said letting him hug me tightly.

"Missed you too, Doll. More than you know." He whispered in my ear. I noticed that Louise put a children's book into Jax's bag and that made me pull away a little.

"So… how is the mother to be?" I asked, addressing the big elephant in the room.

"Eh… you know how it is." Jax said with a shrug, knowing that this is a sore object for the two of us.

He was about to say something, when we heard strange things in the distance.

"What the hell was that?" Louise asked and both Jax and I walked over to the window. A huge explosion could be heard and a huge ball of light moved across the sky.

"Oh, shit!" Jax and I said at the same time and ran through the door. We both knew what had happened and we saw the rival gang Mayans, drive by, cursing at us and threw a bottle of some sort, hitting me straight in the head. I fell with a groan, feeling the blood oozing from my forehead.

"Whoa, Sophie! Are you okay?" Jax asked, kneeling by my side.

"Fuck!" I exclaimed, groaning from the pain. "I'm fine, Jax."

Jax looked worried but helped me to stand up. He moved hair out of my face, letting his hands linger on my face, forcing me to look straight into those eyes of his. I felt a little woozy, and had to focus very hard.

"You're kind of beautiful, do you know that?" I said in a daze. Jax couldn't help but laugh at me.

"I think that proves that you hit your head pretty hard." Jax said. "Let's get you checked out."

"No, I'm fine." I argued, not wanting to be a problem.

"Sophie, you could've gotten a concussion." Jax told me, he was worried about me.

"I'll be fine. I just need to get home." I said, trying to open my car door.

"You shouldn't be driving, and you shouldn't be alone." Jax said and found my medical bag in the front seat. I had to admit that I liked the attention he gave me and I was squealing like a teenage girl on the inside.

"I will be fine. I can take care of myself." I said, waving him away.

"You don't have a choice. I will drive you back to the clubhouse, and you'll stay there with me tonight, so I can keep an eye on you." Jax argued with me. It made me feel good to know that he took such good care of me. Maybe he did it out of guilt after drifting apart the last five years?

"I don't want to cause you any trouble." I argued. "You can drop me off at Donna and Opie's."

"Would you please let me take care of my best friend?" Jax said firmly and I didn't want us to fight about this anymore.

"Fine. If you want too so badly." I said as he cleaned my headwound. I hissed at the discomfort but Jax didn't flinch. I couldn't help but stare at him, and I loved the tingling feeling I felt down my spine.

"Are you good?" Jax asked, bringing me out of my own head.

"Yes… yes, everything's good." I said quickly.

"Good. Now, move over and let me drive." Jax demanded and practically lifted me off the driver's seat over to the passenger side.

"What about your bike?" I asked, thinking of his beloved 2003 Harley-Davidson Dyna Super Glide Sport.

"Don't worry about it. I'll get someone to pick it up. You're more important to me than some bike." Jax said as he drove my car out of the store's parking lot.

I was so glad it was dark outside, so he couldn't see me blush. I loved the fact that I was more important than his bike. Nothing was more important than his bike.

* * *

My head was pounding and I could feel my eyelids getting heavier. I knew I had a concussion and that I shouldn't fall asleep. But I really wanted to sleep.

"Hey, Soph. Are you still with me?" Jax asked, shaking my shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah. I just want to sleep for a little bit." I yawned.

"No, no, Sophie! Don't fall asleep just yet. We're just about to park at the clubhouse." Jax told me and shook my shoulder a little bit harder. I struggled with keeping my eyes open but tried my best to obey him.

I felt my car come to a holt and that Jax quickly got out of the car. He came over to my side and helped me out, supporting me as we went.

"What happened?" Chibs asked, suddenly sobering up.

"Mayans. They hit her with something as they drove by. She has a concussion." Jax said, steading me a little better.

"Is she alright?" Mama Gem said as she touched my forehead, making me hiss.

"I'm fine Gemma. I just need to sleep." I said, leaning into Jax.

"Someone should sit with her tonight." Gemma said.

"I got it." Jax said and ushered me inside the clubhouse, towards the apartment. He placed me gently on the bed, not wanting to hurt me and wrapped me up in a blanket. I haven't spent a night here in almost five years, and it felt good.

"Okay, Sophie. I will check on you in about 30 minutes, and I'll wake you up." Jax told me and caressed my cheek.

"Thank you, Jax. I love you." I mumbled half asleep, not completely sure what I said. I felt a kiss on my forehead and I was out like a light.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

After a rather exhausting night, looking after Sophie, Jax had finally gotten his bike back and was ready to join Clay, Bobby and Tig out to the warehouse right outside town, that blew up during the night. He was tired, but it was worth it, hearing Sophie saying 'I love you.' Even if it was while she was basically unconscious.

Jax and the Sons rode their bikes out to the warehouse they stocked their guns, that they sold on the black market, and they suspected Mayans to be behind this, considering they rode through town yesterday.

As they arrived, the fire department was already there, including the Sheriff.

"What the hell happened?" Clay asked the Sheriff in that county.

"Propane tanks caught fire. Ammo was there. The place just blew." He answered.

"Shit!" Clay exclaimed in frustration.

"Yeah, the fire dick says it was arson. Saw a lot of boot prints." Sheriff Trammel said.

"Cowboy boots?"

"Yeah, I think so." Trammel confirmed.

"Shit-eatin' Mayans, man." Tig said annoyed.

"Where the hell was Rodrigo?" Jax asked a little annoyed. No sleep really got to him.

"No sign of your watchman."

"What's the exposure?" Clay asked.

"Officially? Me and the fire department. The fire captain can be convinced to rethink his report." Sheriff Trammel told them.

"Unofficially?" Jax asked, knowing that this was bad.

"Unofficially, this blast was seen in two counties. This location is dead." Trammel confirmed for the gang.

"Jesus Christ! The M4's?" Clay was mostly concerned about that.

"Gone, as are most of the Glocks." Trammel told him and that made Clay lose it a little. Jax tried to calm the situation down and grabbed the sheriff's shoulder.

"Get the firemen on board. Don't want this shit hittin' A.T. F's radar." Jax said and paid the man off. "Let's get out of here."

"Hold on. You gotta see something else." Trammel stopped them.

"Do we really?" Clay asked sarcastically, but showed them anyway. Down in what used to be a basement, two bodies were found, wrapped up in each other. Clearly two workers, trying to get away from whatever danger it was.

"Goddamn. Fried and refried." Clay said, a little disgusted by the corpses.

"They're illegals. Part of our assembly crew." Tig confirmed a little on edge.

"We found them before the F.D. went through." Trammel said.

"Well, after the smoke clears, get rid of the bodies." Clay ordered.

"What am I supposed to tell our boys up in Oaktown? I'm supposed to deliver five cases to Leroy and his crew before tomorrow morning." Trammel told them.

"Call the gangster hotline, set a meetin'." Clay said, and Jax offered him more money.

"It ain't easy being King." Jax said under his breath.

"Yeah, you remember that." Clay said, before they walked back to their bikes.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I woke up when the sunlight hit my face. I could've sworn someone kissed me, but I woke up alone in my room. I knew that Jax stayed up with me all night, checking on me, just to see if I were okay. I can't remember much, but something told me that I told him that I love him. I can't be sure but…

I yawned and stretched in bed, thinking about how it was to be back in the club like this. I missed it, sure. But I loved taking care of the twins and living with Donna. I want to be a mom myself, one day. Maybe that's why I miss them.

Someone knocked on the door, and I sat up quickly.

"Uhm… come in?" I said with a question, as I tried to ignore the raging headache I have going on.

Gemma opened the door and I felt relieved.

"Hey, Mama Gem. What's going on?" I asked Gemma, trying to make it look good.

"Oh, you know. Checking on my sweet baby girl." Gemma said, handing me some painkillers for my head. "How are you feeling?"

"I feel okay. Only I manage to be hit by a fucking bottle made of glass." I said with a groan, feeling the bump forming on my forehead.

"That's going to be sore for a couple of days. Are you scheduled to work today?" Gemma asked with worry.

"I'm just going to the hospital, working the voluntary shift. It's my turn to sit with the babies in the NICU, I had conversations with some of the parents last night. There's this one family that have an older daughter, and they feel like they've been neglecting her. So I told them to take her out for the day, and I would stay with the little one. I have to get going soon." I answered her.

"Are you sure that you're up to it?" Gemma asked me as I rose from bed.

"Yeah, I'll mostly be sitting around in there all day anyway." I said with a shrug. "Bah! I need a shower."

"You go do that, I'll find you some clean clothes." Gemma told me and kissed my cheek.

"I've missed you around here, Sophie. Things just aren't the same without you." Gemma called to me as I stepped into the shower.

"Yeah, I know. But Donna and the kids needed me. I'm sorry for not being here." I yelled back at her.

"Yeah, well. Maybe if you hadn't left, Jax would not have jumped into a relationship with the train wreck, Wendy." Gemma mumbled, and it made my stomach turn.

"You and I both know that Jax would've been in this shit with or without me." I told her, but I knew I was lying to myself.

"Now, that's not true and you know it." Gemma shot back. I jumped out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel.

"Look at it this way… In 10 weeks, you'll get something so precious out of it, grandma." I said with a smile, and it made Gemma brighten up.

"That's true. But never call me grandma again." Gemma told me, halfheartedly.

"I won't, grandma." I said with a giggle. Gemma started to laugh herself and gave me a hug.

"I have a few things to take care of, and I'll talk to you later." Gemma said before walking to the door.

"Hey, Sophie… Welcome home, Princess."

I couldn't help but smile at her. It sounded like I left town or something, but I understood where she came from, it felt good to be back at the club.

* * *

I got dressed and found my father at the bar. He looked a little more fragile now that he's constantly hooked onto an oxygen tank. All the years of heavy drinking and smoking, had its toll on him. Dad didn't care much about his health, even though I tried to help him, he didn't listen. He is just as stubborn as I am.

"Isn't it a little early in the morning for you to start drinking?" I asked, kissing my old man on the cheek.

"Hey, sweetheart. I never stopped drinking." My dad said and it pained me to see him like this.

"Dad. We talked about this. It's not good for you." I said with a sigh. It's no use getting angry at him, he'll just get angry back and all hell breaks loose.

"It's my life kiddo, let me live it how I want." Dad told me, and I just shook my head and grabbed the bottle away from him.

"Hey! That's mine!" Dad called after me.

"You're not killing yourself, not on my watch!" I yelled back. I threw the bottle of scotch away, feeling disgusted as I did.

"Hey, Sophie." I heard a voice behind me say. I turned around and saw Kip.

"Kip! How's the hand?" I asked, looking at his injured hand.

"It hurts like a mother, but I've been careful." Kip told me.

"That's good, let's change the dressing." I said, getting my bag out of the car. Kip was a really nice guy and he was easy to talk to. As I cleaned his wound, he told me about his life and how he got to the club. It was good for me to laugh, even though my head hurt.

"I heard you got into it with the Mayans last night." Kip told me. "How's the head?"

"Well, it hurts like a fucking bitch, but… that how it is." I said with a sigh.

"This looks good, to be this new, I mean." I told him, redressing his wound. "Keep this up, and you'll be good as new in a couple of days."

"Thanks Sophie." Kip said, at the same time as Chibs came in with a messed-up car. Someone had a collision head on with a deer. It grossed me out and I felt sorry for the fucker that had to clean up that mess.

At the same time, Jax came back from whatever he had to do early in the morning, and parked his bike just a few feet away. I tried my best to act all cool.

"Some days you're the Beamer, some days you're the goddamn deer." Jax said, looking at the cadaver stuck to the front shield.

"Some yuppie creamed her up at the streams." Chibs told him.

"He run into it, or hit a tree while it was giving him head?" Jax asked and I couldn't help but laugh. He was so vulgar sometimes.

"How the hell you want me to get it out of there?" Kip asked a little sick to his stomach. Jax smiled evilly and found a chainsaw they kept in the truck. Now, I felt sick to my stomach.

"Come on. Jesus, man!" Kip exclaimed.

"Just pretend its's 'carve your own steak' night at Sizzler. Jax said with a grin.

"I don't eat meat, man." I felt so bad for Kip. He really felt uncomfortable.

"Figure it out, grunt." Jax told him and fired up a smoke. I watched as Kip did what he was told, and I followed Jax and Chibs.

"What the hell happened?" Chibs asked, referring to the explosion that happened last night.

"Mayans torched the warehouse, and hurt Sophie." Jax told him. "They stole the Niners' M4s."

"Holy shit." Chibs exclaimed and I couldn't agree more. This was bad, even I knew that.

"Clay's gone to sit down with Leroy, try and buy some time." Jax told us and I wished they could get out of this business.

"Niners already paid for that hardware." Chibs argued.

"That's the tricky part." Jax sighed.

I figured it was time for me to leave, so I walked towards my car.

"Hey, Sophie!" I heard Jax call after me. I tried my best to act cool before turning towards him.

"What's up, Jax?" I asked, mentally slapping myself for sounding like a complete moron.

"How's the head holding up?" He asked, touching my forehead. I felt my pulse rising, my arms and legs go all numb and I had some trouble finding my words.

"Uhm… It's still a little sore, but everything is fine. I need to get going." I said, opening the door.

"Soph… Are you okay?" Jax asked, stopping me from leaving.

"Why wouldn't I be?" I answered with a high-pitch voice.

"You're acting funny." Jax mumbled. "Hey… about what you told me last night."

Luckily for me, Jax's phone started to ring, and I could tell it was Gemma. They were talking about Wendy. I broke my heart and I saw that as my cue to get the fuck out of here. Jax turned away from me and I drove out of the yard without him being able to stop me. I needed to get to the hospital anyway.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax wanted to talk to Sophie about what she had said last night. The way she said 'I love you' felt more intimate than the other times she had said it and when she got into the car, it felt like the best way to ask her about it.

But when he was interrupted by his phone, the thoughts flew out of his head. He groaned and knew he had to take the call from his mother.

 _"Hey, Ma."_

 ** _"Did you go to storage?"_**

 _"Not yet."_

 ** _"Well if there's something in there you can use…. I haven't looked at that baby stuff in years, not since Sophie so kindly packed everything away after I wasn't able to do it."_**

 _"I'm sure anything will help."_

 ** _"Still coming to dinner tomorrow night? I'm picking up steaks from the German."_**

 _"Oh, you know it."_

 ** _"You should bring Chibs, Sophie and that new kid."_**

 _"The new kid doesn't eat meat. And Sophie was acting weird today."_

 ** _"Don't patch him in. Can't trust anyone doesn't eat meat. As for Sophie, she'll be alright. She's just overwhelmed by being back, that's all."_**

 _"Hey, you hear from my crazy ex-wife at all? Never answer her goddamn phone."_

 ** _"That's because she knows it's you."_**

 _"Yeah, well, she's supposed to be sending me the doctor bills. I haven't seen one in weeks."_

 ** _"I'll go by on my way home. I'll check in on her. And you better invite Sophie over for dinner, do not mess that up. We just got our Princess back. Do not lose her again."_**

 _"I won't, I promise. Thanks, grandma."_

 ** _"Asshole."_**

Jax hung up the phone, turning to where he left Sophie, only to find the parking space empty.

"Shit!" He said under his breath, before turning towards Chibs.

"When did she leave?"

"Right after hearing you talk about your ex-wife. You idiot." Chibs answered in annoyance. For everyone else but Jax, it was obvious how much Sophie loved him and that she would do whatever it took for him to be happy. Why couldn't Jax see that himself?

* * *

Jax finally pulled himself together enough to go the storage unit, Sophie got for them when his father died. It amazed him how smart and organized Sophie was back then. She was only 14 and still managed to make sure everything was okay, and even though his mother wanted to get rid of it all, Sophie was smart enough to make sure that nothing got lost.

The storage unit was filled with Thomas' old baby stuff and a lot of old boxes. Probably done by Soph. He found his old car seat, old toys that meant a lot to his little brother. The only teddy bear missing, was the one he was buried with. Sophie's old teddy. The one Gemma bought for her when she was born.

Jax looked at everything in the storage and then stumbled over a box, hidden under all sorts of crap. A box labeled 'John Misc.'

Jax opened it and found all kinds of pictures from the early days. From the days, he, Opie and Sophie did everything together, and pictures from around the time his parents first got together. At the bottom of the box, he found a thick envelope with the title; Original 3-15-93

Jax got curious and opened the envelope. The first thing he noticed, was a note that fell out. He picked it up recognized the handwriting to be Sophie's.

 ** _Jackson. Your father told me to keep this safe from you until you were ready to read it, read about what John wanted the club to be. I just hope by the time you find this; you'll be able to understand why I didn't give it to you when he passed away. I love you with all my heart._**

 ** _Sophie._**

Jax furrowed his eyebrows, not understanding what he was holding in his hand. It kind of looked like an unpublished book and the title almost screamed at him.

 ** _THE LIFE AND DEATH OF SAM CROW. HOW THE SONS OF ANARCHY LOST THEIR WAY. BY JOHN THOMAS TELLER._**

Jax flipped the page and found a dedication.

 _For my sons Thomas, who is already at peace. And Jackson, may Sophie make sure he never knows this life of chaos._

Jax looked at this script in awe. He knew that Sophie never wanted to hurt him by not showing him this sooner. Like she had written; She did what his father wanted and she hoped that in time, he was ready to read it. Maybe that time… was now.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I arrived at the hospital right on time. I still had a slight headache but it's nothing I can't cope with. I parked my car and headed for the NICU, where the parents of 8 weeks premature, Lily, was waiting for me. The mother, Lucy, was anxiously waiting for me, pacing back and forth. I knew this was hard for her.

"Hey, Lucy." I said, walking up to here. Lucy was freaking out and it took a long time before I managed to calm her down enough to assure her that I would take good care of Lily.

Lily was a good girl. She was now about 10 weeks old, meaning, she would originally be around two weeks, and she's going to be just fine. She had some severe lung problems and it was a little touch and go for a while. She was one of the happy cases, but I've had a few cases that ended badly. I can't tell you how much I hate seeing the babies without a fighting chance, but that's why I do this. I want to save as many as I can, and every day, I learn something new.

After some time, I needed a coffee break and told the nurse I would be right back. I hated leaving the kids alone but I needed my daily intake of caffeine.

My mind kept spinning on how things had changed the last 24 hours. Being close to Jax and how it felt to be looked after by him again. I hoped that for once, he would see me, and take his chance on me. Nothing would stand in our way now, right?

I didn't see where I was going, and bumped into someone.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" I exclaimed before finally seeing who it was. My inside froze again, but not in a good way. Right in front of me, stood the one person I never wanted to see again, the one person I was afraid would take Jax away from me again.

"Tara." I whispered in shock.

"Oh, it's you." Tara said rudely, giving me the stink eye. "You never got your stupid ass out of Charming, I see."

I could feel my anger rise even more.

"What are you doing here, Tara?" I asked, trying to keep my anger in check.

"I've moved back home, gotten a transfer here as a resident." Tara answered smugly.

"Why?" I asked quickly.

"Oh, you know… I missed my home town and… other things. Tell me, how's it going with Jax?" Tara asked smugly.

"Don't talk to me about Jax." I spat at her, hating the fact that she was back.

"Still a sore spot I see." She said with that laugh that made you want to rip your ears off.

"Know this, Tara. I will never forgive you for leaving Jax like you did, all those years ago." I spat at her. "Jax doesn't need your shit right now, and if you so much as try to fuck him up, I will fuck you up so badly, you wished you stayed out of town."

With that, I walked away. I was not the same girl I was a decade ago; I was not going to watch Tara screw Jax all over again. It's not right.

* * *

I walked back to NICU and sat down next to Lily's incubator, feeling the hatred I feel for Tara slowly going away.

I used my day going over the upcoming charity event. Gemma and I worked on this together every year, raising money for my organization and the research. Lily slept soundly in her bed, and every time the doctor came in, I had to step out. I was talking to one of the nurses when the paramedics rushed through the doors, causing panic everywhere.

"32-year-old female, Wendy Case, suffers from a drug overdose, about 30 weeks pregnant. BP is dropping!" I heard the paramedics yell at one another, and I just froze. This was Jax's ex-wife. This was Jax's son. I knew that this would be a premature baby and I intended to be there for that child, as much as possible. Dr. Namid looked at me with an apologetic look, before rushing through the doors.

I tried to call Gemma, Jax, everyone at the club. Even Clay. Gemma finally answered, telling me that they were on their way to the hospital. I tried my best to get information, but they wouldn't give me any answers since I wasn't family. I waited nervously for the club to arrive at the hospital, and it felt a little better when I heard them pulling up.

I ran towards the entrance and I could tell that Jax was scared shitless. When he saw me, he instantly wrapped his arms around me, hugging me tightly. I felt at ease here. I love him.

"It's okay, Jax. Everything is going to be okay." I whispered in his ear. Jax grabbed my hand as we all walked in to the ICU. Gemma filled us in on what happened.

"I found these matches next to a bunch of her empty thumb bags." Gemma told us. "Hairy Dog."

We all knew where that came from.

"Shit." Jax exclaimed, squeezing my hand even tighter.

"It's gotta be the Nords dealing out of the Dog again." Clay said as we walked through the corridor.

"Darby got out of Chino two weeks ago." I heard Bobby say but my main focus was on Jax. He looked absolutely terrified.

"Yeah, well, call the Nazi prick. Set a meeting." Clay demanded.

As we walked closer to the room Wendy was assigned for, I could feel Jax tense up even more. He was suddenly staring at an old girlfriend, he didn't even know Tara was back in town. I was afraid that he would drop me like a piece of shit and not look back, or at least ask why she had returned. But that didn't happen. He approached Tara with only one thing on his mind; His son.

Tara walked towards us, noticing that Jax kept his hand in mine. And as always, she played the role of sweet innocence.

"What the hell happened?" Jax asked her.

"When was the last time you saw her?" Tara asked softly.

"Couple of weeks." Jax told her honestly.

"Her hands and feet were full of tracks. Toxicology reports aren't back yet, but it's most likely crank." Tara told us, and Jax's grip on my hand just got even tighter.

"The baby?"

"We had to do an emergency C-section. He's ten weeks premature." Tara answered something I knew would already happen.

"Holy shit!" Jax exclaimed and for some reason wrapped me into a hug, trying to disguise his tears. But I could feel him trembling against my form. I knew Tara didn't like it and it made me so happy, knowing this pained her, but I was here for Jax now, not anyone else.

"Come on. Let's sit down, and I'll talk you through it. With the family." Tara said, giving me the stink eye again.

"Just tell me…" Jax demanded.

"He's got a congenital heart defect... and gastroschisis – a tear in his abdomen. The gastro and the early birth are the drugs. But the C.H.D is probably." Tara said..

"The family flaw." Gemma finished, and all I could think about was Thomas.

"Yes, it's genetic. Either one would be serious, but not life-threatening. However, the two of them together… Dr. Namid gives him a 20 % chance, and I'm afraid that's being optimistic." Tara said, and I could stop the tears from forming in my eyes.

"She never wanted to talk to me. I didn't know." Jax told us, and I knew this was hard for him.

"Her O.B. said she missed her last three appointments. No one knew. Dr. Namid wants to fix his belly first. Then if he stabilizes, he'll go and try to repair his heart. I'm sorry, Jax." Tara said but he kept his gaze on me, trying to figure out what to do next. I knew that we could go and see his son and tried to reason with Jax.

"Hey… I can come with you and see your son now. You can go and see Abel." I said, feeling the need to whisper.

"It's a good name." Tara said professionally, and I knew this was just bullshit from Tara's end. Jax looked at me one more time, and I could see the torment in his eyes.

"Soph, stay with my mom and go and see Abel. I will be here soon. I need to take care of some shit." Jax said, and I knew what he wanted to do.

"Watch his back." Clay ordered Chibs and Bobby. I stood there frozen to the floor, not quite sure what to do.

"Sophie, sweetheart." Gemma said softly, touching my shoulder. "Let's go see Abel before he goes into surgery."

I nodded at Gemma, following her. Tara still looked pissed and stopped me.

"You may work as a volunteer at this hospital, but this is a family matter, and you're not Abel's family." Tara hissed at me.

"Get your hands off me before I rip them off and shove them up your ass." I growled with a warning. Gemma looked equally pissed.

"Sophie is family, and family stick together. She's allowed to see my grandson, a hell of a lot more than I could say about you." Gemma told Tara and she knew she wouldn't stand a chance against Mama Gem. Tara didn't say anything for a long time, just stood there eyeing all of us.

"Fine, follow me." Tara said in defeat. Gemma grabbed my hand and we walked together towards the room they held Abel. I had seen my fair share of sick babies, but nothing prepared me for what I was about to see.

When Tara opened the door, I took a deep breath. I walked in with Gemma and she looked just as scared and sad like I did.

I gasped at the sight in front of me. In the little incubator in the middle of the room, connected to all kind of wires, was a tiny little baby, fighting for his life. This little baby was fighting as hell to stay alive. Tara was right, his chances were small, but she forgot that the Teller family never gave up that easily. He was going to survive this.

Gemma was talking to Dr. Namid and I walked closer to the incubator, not caring that my eyes filled with tears. I pressed the palm of my hand against the glass, wanting to protect this boy so badly. I already felt a connection to this boy, and I would do whatever it takes to keep him safe.

"Hi, Abel. I am your Aunt Sophie. Please survive this. Your daddy needs you. I promise I will protect you, just get well. Fight this with all you have." I whispered to him, hoping that he would hear me.

"Sophie." Dr. Namid said, putting a hand on my shoulder. "We need to do some tests right now; you can come back later.

I wiped my eyes clean of tears and nodded my head.

"Okay." I agreed and stepped away from the incubator. Gemma grabbed my hand again as we watched they take Abel away for his tests. It was heartbreaking, but we knew that he was in the best of hands. I just hoped that Jax wouldn't shut down again and walk away from his little boy.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

After almost killing that Nords drug dealer, Jax went to talk to Opie. He needed his friend, and he needed his help. When Opie saw him, he walked right up to him.

"So I got a call from my sister this morning, telling me that it was a gun factory that blew up out by the streams last night." Opie said as he reached his friend.

"Mayans hit us. Stole our M4s. We need you." Jax told him and he could tell that Opie was between a rock and a hard place.

"For what?" Opie asked.

"Bobby's got a gig this weekend." Jax told him, even though Opie could read between the lines.

"No way man!"

"We gotta get in and out fast. You're the only guy that can pull it off." Jax argued.

"You think I wanna be here, chippin' wood for shit pay? I made a promise to Donna and my sister. Sophie would seriously kill me and chop me up into little pieces, go all Dexter on my ass for not respecting Donna's wishes. I'm earning straight." Opie said, more terrified of his sister than anything else.

"Come on, Opie. We all earn straight. I spend 40 hours a week with a goddamn power tool in my hand." Jax said, trying to win him over.

"When you're on Clay's payroll, everything in your hand is a power tool." Opie said, rolling his eyes.

"Are you saying no to the club?" Jax asked.

"Everything turned to shit since I got out. I'm in debt up to my eyeballs. My kids hardly know me. I even mention Sam Crow to Donna, she's gonna bust out crying." Opie told him as he took out a pack of cigarettes.

"Look man, if you need money…" Jax started to say.

I don't want to borrow. I want to earn." Opie cut him off.

"What about asking Sophie? She would do whatever it takes for those kids." Jax said, trying to make things easier on him.

"Sophie dropped everything when I went to jail. She provided for my family for five years, no questions asked. I can't ask her for money anymore. She's done so much." Opie told him and it pained him that he wasn't able to pay his own sister back.

"Your family's just gotta get used to you being around again. Kids gotta get used to how ugly their dad is." Jax said, earning a laugh from Opie.

"Donna knows what the life is."

"You leave a woman alone for five years, two kids, and my feisty sister, the only thing she knows is that it doesn't want it to happen again." Opie explained.

"The Mayans hurt your sister last night. She was in town when they came by." Jax used Sophie as a last resort for Opie to join them.

"Breaks over, let's go!" Opie heard his boss call out. Jax could see the wheels turning in his head, debating on what to do.

"Let me know when you need me." Opie told him and Jax knew that Opie was back.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I knew it would do me no good, sitting in the waiting room with Gemma. Abel would be in surgery for at least a few more hours, and I still had a duty concerning Lily.

Lucy and her husband came by the hospital when they said they would and it made me happy to see them so much more refreshed. I tried to act as professional as I could, not showing any signs of falling apart.

"How did it go today?" I asked, trying to smile. Their oldest daughter smiled and jumped up on my lap.

"I got to ride a pony, and a lady made me a butterfly." She said, pointing at her face paint.

"I can see that. It's very nice, Emma." I said to the little girl on my lap. Emma turned her little body around, wrapping her tiny arms around my neck tightly.

"Thank you for looking out for my sister." She whispered in my ear. This little girl was so precious, and I made up my mind that if I ever have a girl of my own, I will name her Emma. It was hard for me to stay here any longer. I needed to get out of here, and have some time by myself.

The family thanked me again, and I walked out of their room quickly.

I ran into Gemma in the corridor, and she looked just as shitty as I did.

"Hey. Any news about Abel?" I asked, steadying my breath.

"No news yet, but we should hear something soon." Gemma said.

"How are you holding up?" Gemma asked me, and it didn't feel right that she asked me that.

"I'm okay, I guess." I answered with a shrug. "How are you?"

"Angry, sad, scared shitless." Gemma said honestly.

"Yeah, me too." I agreed.

"I'm going to get some coffee; do you want some?" Gemma asked.

"No, thanks." I said with a smile and tried to call Jax. He should be here for his kid.

 _"Hey, Jax. It's me._

 _Uhm. The doctor's will be done with Abel's tests soon and you should come see him. He needs his father here._

 _You know what's strange? I feel so terrible by the fact that I got to see your son before you. He's so beautiful, Jax. He's so beautiful it hurts. Looks like you._

 _Please come by the hospital soon. Abel needs his father._

 _Bye."_

I disconnected the call and rested my head against the wall, closing my eyes.

When I opened them again, I looked right at Wendy's room. I don't know what got over me, but I opened the door and walked in.

She was still sleeping, looking like crap. When you go through what she went through today, it's no wonder.

I sat down on a chair next to her bed, not knowing why I did so. I was in my own head, not seeing her waking up.

"Sophie, what are you doing here?" A weak voice asked. I looked up and saw Wendy staring at me with tears in her eyes.

"I wanted to see how you're doing." I said, trying not to show how angry I was at her.

"Why would you care about me?" Wendy asked me suspiciously.

"Actually, I don't. But no matter how much I wanted for you not to be that little boy's mother, you are, and you owe it to Abel to get better." I snapped at her.

"I know. I will get better." Wendy said quickly, but I couldn't help but question that.

"Why, Wendy? Why did you do this?" I asked, trying not to cry. "Why would you hurt Jax like that, hurt Abel like that?"

"I don't know. I just snapped, not being what Jax wanted all along. Not living up to what he needed in his life. At some point, I decided that I didn't care anymore. All I cared about, was myself." Wendy told me honestly.

"That's the lamest excuse I've ever heard!" I huffed before getting up to leave her room.

"Do you know how painful it is?" Wendy asked, making me stop. "Do you know how painful it is, being with someone, and knowing that, this person wished you were someone else, watching him comparing you to someone else? Hearing him screaming out someone else's name during sex."

"I've done that, for the last few years. I watched my husband, wishing I was someone else. I hated the fact that I could never be the one he wanted to be with. And for that, I hated myself, I hated you… I hated everything."

"Why would you hate me? You don't even know me." I argued, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Who do you think Jax compared me to?" Wendy asked, taking a deep breath. "No matter what other woman Jax has in his life, he'll always compare them to you."

When Wendy told me that, I completely froze. She had to be wrong, still stoned or something.

Jax didn't compare all his conquests to me. She's delusional. I couldn't find anything clever to say, so I just walked out of her room. I needed to get out of here, I needed fresh air, something else to do. I walked quickly towards the hospital's exit, not wanting to talk to anyone.

"Sophie, sweetheart… where are you…" Gemma started to say but I didn't stop, I just kept on walking out.

* * *

I ran towards my car and sped out of the parking lot before something made me stop and turn around.

I don't know why, but I stopped outside Jax's house, where Wendy lived. I sat there in the driveway, leaning my head against the steering wheel, taking deep breaths, trying not to cry, ignoring every call on my phone.

Opening the door to the house a few minutes later, met me with a shock. The smell was the worst part of it all. It smelled like booze, crank and shit. It smelled like something had died in here. Walking around the house, I found that each room was worse than the last. When I reached the kitchen, I stopped dead in my tracks. The floor was covered in blood, I guess this is where Wendy finally collapsed. I couldn't stand to look at it and pulled my long golden blonde hair up in a bun.

I found some old cleaning supplies in one of the closets and decided to start cleaning. I wanted the blood off the floor and on the counter where she probably latched on before she collapsed.

I sat down next to the pool of blood and started scrubbing. The blood was in every crack of the tiled floor. I needed to get rid of it all.

Everything that's happened today, raced through my mind. This day was fucked up, it shouldn't have been like this. I was scrubbing so hard, I thought I might break the floor or something. I wasn't even paying attention to anything around me, so when a hand came down on my shoulder, I freaked out.

"Jesus fucking Christ!" I yelled, seeing Gemma standing there behind me with a shocked expression on her face.

"Don't do that, Gemma! Fuck!" I exclaimed before going back to scrubbing.

"What are you doing here, Sophie?" Gemma asked, trying to get me to stop.

"What does it look like? I'm cleaning this fucking house." I said without looking at her.

"Why, sweetheart?"

"Because I need to feel useful. I need to do something!" I told her. Gemma put her hand on my shoulder again, trying to get me to stop once again.

"Sophie..." Was the only thing she said.

"I can't do anything else, Gemma." I said in a whisper. "I don't know what else to do."

Gemma looked so sad and hugged me tightly. For the first time in what seemed like forever, I cried, more like full on sobbed. I haven't cried like this since Thomas died.

"You are not useless, baby. We'd be lost without you." Gemma said with her soothing voice.

"Sometimes, it just don't feel like it." I said and Gemma knew what I meant.

"Why don't I help you clean up the place a little, and then we'll see how it will turn out?" Gemma asked, knowing that this was something I needed to do. After getting rid of that awful bloodstain in the kitchen, Gemma and I started on the living room. It looked like a dumpsite.

"So, I bumped ugly with Tara earlier today…" I said, breaking the silence between us.

"What did that bitch say to you?" Gemma asked angrily.

"Well, she tried to tease me with Jax. How I stilled pined after him, making her think that we weren't together because he loved her and still does." I said with a sigh.

"Don't listen to that prissy bitch, Sophie. She's no match to you." Gemma told me.

"I know. I told her that if she ever tried to screw things up for Jax again, I would fuck her up. And to be honest, I cannot wait until she does, so I can kick her boney ass." I said, making Gemma laugh.

"Well, look at that… The SAMCRO Princess finally came out of her shell." Gemma said proudly. "You've been missed, Sophie Winston."

I only smiled and continued cleaning. It was the only thing to keep my mind clear from all the things Wendy had told me today. I walked into the kitchen to get clean water when I heard the door opened, it surprised me at first, but then it dawned on me whom it was…

Jax.

I was not ready for this.

"It's almost midnight." I heard Jax say to his mother.

"This place is a goddamn pigsty." Gemma answered him.

"Cleaning was never her strong suit." Jax said with a sigh.

"What are you doing here?" Gemma asked him.

"It's my house."

"You know what I mean. We don't want you to see it this way." Gemma said without thinking.

"We?"

I stepped out of the kitchen and Jax's posture change drastically.

"Sophie…"

"I needed to do something to help." I said cutting it short. I didn't want to look directly at him.

"You two don't have to do this." Jax told us.

"Look, we just want to get it livable. Buying some new things. That's what's my company is for." I rambled on. "So you can live here, with your son."

"Sophie, stop cleaning right now!" Jax yelled at me, making me stop dead in my tracks. Jax never yells at me. Not ever.

"Can't you get through your head, he's not going to make it." Jax told the both of us.

"What are you talking about? What happened?" Gemma asked frantically, scared that something happened to her grandson.

"He was born with half a stomach and a hole in his heart. He's gonna die." Jax told us, and I just lost it.

I slapped him hard across the face.

"Don't you dare say that, Jackson!" I yelled with tears in my eyes. I only called him Jackson when I was pissed at him.

"That's your son and you're all he has in this world. Don't come in here and say that he won't make it, he's strong. Strong enough to beat this! All he needs is a father that believes in him. If you don't believe in him, then by all means; go down to the hospital and kill him yourself!" I said, taking off my rubber gloves, throwing them across the room. I walked hastily towards the door, wanting to get away from him.

"I won't allow you to give up, Jax. Not when there's a family that needs you." I said before leaving the house. I couldn't understand why Jax would just give up on his son like this. Why wouldn't he fight for him?

I drove my car back to the hospital. I didn't want to leave Abel there alone, so I decided to stay the night, watching over him. It was dead silent around the NICU and it surprised me that no one stopped me from going in to see Abel.

The sounds of the machines, hit me in the face, but it was good to see that it helped him somewhat. I sat down in the rocking chair next to him, watching his every move. I wanted to watch over him the entire night, but I had to give into sleep after some time. I wanted to be here, every step of the way.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

"I won't allow you to give up, Jax. Not when there's a family that needs you."

Jax just stared at the closed door after he heard a car driving away.

"Shit!" Jax exclaimed under his breath. How could he have been so stupid?

"What the hell is your problem, Jax?" Gemma hissed at him. "Why won't you fight for your son? Sophie is fighting for him, and she's doing it by choice. You don't have one!"

Gemma walked over to the table, lighting up a smoke to relax a little.

"I'm sorry… but Sophie is right… You need to go see him, Jax." Gemma said pleadingly.

"I can't."

"Why?" Gemma argued. "Because he'll break your heart? It's called being a father."

"For how long? A day, a week?" Jax asked, not knowing what else to say.

"You know, you were born with that same heart defect your little brother had. You seem pretty sturdy to me. I came through hell, landed on my feet. Your father was hit by a goddamn semi. Dragged 178 yards. And that bastard lived for two more days. Teller's do not die easy." Gemma told him.

"No. We just die bloody." Jax said with a hint of sarcasm.

"That's the Irish in us." Gemma told him.

"When you and dad hooked up, he ever talk to you about his vision? About what he wanted for the club?" Jax asked out of the blue.

"His vision was, you know, what it is." Gemma said vaguely. "A brotherhood, a family."

"And running guns? He want that?"

"He never talked about that. Why?" Gemma responded sounding a little nervous.

"I found a box of his old shit in the storage unit, that Sophie had organized. There's like, pictures and journals and… things I never knew about him." Jax said.

"What kind of things?"

"It seemed like his original idea for the M.C. was something simpler. You know, social rebellion. He called it a 'Harley commune.' It wasn't outlaw. It was real hippie shit." Jax told her, wanting to see what his mother knew.

"We had a lot of bright ideas back then. We were kids. Your father became a man. Men take care of business." Gemma said, trying to keep herself busy.

"Yeah, we do." Jax said with a sigh, looking at his tired mother.

"You should get home, Mom. Finish cleaning tomorrow. I'll lock up." Jax offered with a small smile.

"Okay darling." Gemma said, embracing her son.

"Night, mom." Jax whispered.

"Night, baby. Oh, and Jackson… You better fix things with Sophie. If you drive her away again, I don't think you'll ever be able to tell her how you feel. Don't let it pass you by." Gemma said before walking out the door.

"I'm trying, Ma… I'm trying." Jax said to himself when he was left alone in his house.

Jax looked around, trying to get some feeling off it. He found Wendy's stash and flushed it down the toilet.

He was never supposed to get this with Wendy… he should've gotten this house to share with Sophie. He just wished that he hadn't screwed everything up just yet...

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I woke up early in the morning with a stiff neck. The thing that woke me was someone kissing my forehead.

I opened my eyes, and saw Gemma crouching in front of me.

"Mama Gem? What's going on?" I asked a little disorientated.

"Hey baby girl. Have you been here all night?" Gemma asked, caressing my hair.

"Uhm, yeah… I didn't want to go home, and I didn't want Abel to go through his first night alone." I told her and tried to stretch my sore muscles. "How is he?"

"Dr. Namid is taking him in for surgery now. Come on, let's get you some coffee and something to eat." Gemma told me and helped me up. I turned towards Abel's incubator again and kissed the glass.

"I will be here when you come back to us." I said, trying not to cry again.

Gemma and I walked together towards the cafeteria, not saying anything to each other. Someone was waiting for us with food and coffee and it made me feel a lot better when I realized it was Luanne. Gemma's best friend. I've always thought of Luanne as my aunt in some way.

"Hey there, Soph…" Luanne said, giving me a hug.

"Hey, Aunt Luanne." I said with a sigh.

"Everything will be okay, Sophie." Luanne reassured me and moved a lock of hair out of my face.

"I really hope so." I told her, trying not to cry again.

"Yes, we all do." Gemma added. "All we can do now, is wait."

A few hours later, we saw the familiar figure of Tara. I hated the fact that she could help with Abel's surgery. I hated sitting here, not doing anything. Luanne held me back so I wouldn't attack her.

"Abel's stomach surgery went well. But it's putting a strain on his system. Dr. Namid doesn't want to wait. Thinks we should do the heart surgery now." Tara told us.

"That's good, right – that they're not waiting?" Luanne asked her.

"It's the best choice, yes." Tara answered and Luanne tried to pull me away from Tara.

"Can we talk?" Tara asked mostly Gemma and myself. We looked at Luanne and she just nodded before giving us our space.

"What is it?" I asked, hoping that there's something she didn't tell us about Abel.

"Wendy's in really bad shape. She's still detoxing. Can't stop crying after Sophie paid her a visit last night." Tara told us.

"And?"

"I was hoping you could talk to her. Just let her know that she's not all alone." Tara answered, mostly looking at Gemma. I had said what I needed to say to Wendy.

"Trust me. Nothing I'm gonna say to that crank whore is gonna make her feel loved." Gemma practically hissed.

"Forgot how forthright you can be." Tara said and I wanted to rip her apart.

"You forgot a lot of things, sweetheart." Gemma stated and I tried not to laugh.

"If you have a problem with me assisting on Abel's case, just say so." Tara hissed at us.

"Are you a good doctor?" I asked quickly.

"Yes."

"Then I don't have a problem… But if you make it personal; I will have no problem beating your boney ass." I told her as a warning.

"Good. You know, Sophie; People change. I'm not the same girl I was 11 years ago."

"I am." Gemma shot in. "And even though you have that tattoo on your ass; you will never take Sophie's place in the club. To us, you're nothing."

I could see that Tara wanted to argue, but walked away, trying to be professional.

"I hate her!" I hissed at Gemma.

"I know, sweetheart, but don't let this take you down, okay?" Gemma said as my phone rang.

It was my best friend...

 _"Hey best friend."_

 ** _"Hi, Aunt Sophie!"_**

 _"Ellie! How good it is to hear your voice, sweetheart."_

 ** _"My mom told me I could invite anyone I wanted for dinner. Would you like to come?"_**

 _"Well, how could I say no to that kind of invitation. I'll be over in a little bit, okay?"_

 ** _"Okay. Bye, Aunt Sophie. I love you."_**

 _"Love you too, sweetheart."_

I hung up the phone with a smile. This couldn't have come at a better time. I loved that Ellie wanted me to be with them.

"That sounded like a nice way to spend your day." Gemma said after listening in on my conversation.

"Yeah. I can't say no to that kid." I said, feeling a little better.

"Why don't you go home, take a shower, get changed and head over to the twins. They miss their aunt, you know." Gemma said, stroking my back. "I will call you if something happens with Abel."

"Okay. Thank you." I said, giving my Godmother a hug.

* * *

I walked out of the hospital into the fresh air and bright sunshine. It truly was a beautiful day.

On my way to the house, I called my second in command at the office, telling him that he would have to take the wheel for a few days and that I would be available on my phone. There's no way, I would be able to focus on work right now. Sometimes, I love being the boss.

I jumped into the shower as soon as I got home. I looked down at my body, looking at the few tattoos I had gotten over the years. I had the name Thomas on my ribcage that both Jax and I took to celebrate me getting my driver's license on my 16th birthday. That was the one I held closest to my heart. I didn't have that many, just a few, hidden on odd places. When you're working with what I do, I didn't want any tattoos that I couldn't cover up, if I had to. Not that I'm ashamed of them. I'm very proud of my tattoos.

I changed my clothes in a hurry, fixing my makeup and walk out of my house. I decided to bring some sodas and a little candy for the kids and a bottle of wine for the grownups. I haven't seen the kids or Donna in about a week and I missed them and I had no excuses, I lived like ten minutes away from them.

I parked my car in the driveway of their house, seeing the door open and two kids running outside.

"Aunt Sophie!" I heard them yell happily as I jumped out of the car.

"My babies!" I said, embracing them as tightly as I could. I couldn't believe that they were almost 9 already. I remember them being born, learning how to walk.

"We're not babies anymore, Aunt Sophie." Kenny said, rolling his eyes at my comment. Cheeky little bastard.

"No matter how old you are, you're always my little babies." I said, ruffling his hair. I looked up and saw Donna. She looked tired, dead beat.

"Hey, bestie." I said, hugging her tightly.

"Hey Soph." She answered with a sigh.

Donna and I walked out in the garden with a cup of coffee, while watching the twins play with each other.

"So, I heard about Wendy." Donna said, and I let out a shaky breath.

"Yeah. Abel is in pretty bad shape, came out of surgery right before Ellie called me and invited me over for dinner." I told her. "He's so tiny, Donna. I want to stay strong for Jax's sake, but it's hard, you know. Jax won't even go see him. He's convinced that Abel will die, just like Thomas did and he doesn't want that shit in his life again. He yelled at me yesterday, he never yells at me, ever. It's so frustrating."

"Did you tell him off?" Donna asked, knowing how hard it is to be in love with a Son.

"I kind of slapped him in the face with rubber gloves on." I said, taking a sip of my warm coffee.

"Nice. Never thought you would do that." Donna said, trying to get me to smile.

"How's things with Opie?" I asked, not wanting the spotlight on my problems anymore.

"We're struggling. We have so much debt right now, but he's set on making the money legally." Donna told me and I knew it was hard for them.

"Donna. I've told you before… if you need my help, just say so. I'm more than willing to help my brother and my best friend." I said, trying once again to help them out with money, putting down a couple of thousands on a check.

"Sophie, no. I don't want to borrow money from you. It's worse than the debt we already have." Donna said, giving me my check back.

"It's not a loan. It's my gift to you. I need to make sure that my niece and nephew is covered. Look, if you don't want to use that money to pay your debt, then at least put the money into a college fund for the kids. I want you to take the money." I said, not taking the check back.

I could tell that Donna was at the verge of tears.

"Thank you, Sophie." She said in a whispered. I grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

"All for family." I whispered back.

"Aunt Sophie! Come play with us!" Kenny yelled at me and I jumped out of my seat.

"Yes! I'm going to get you!" I said running after the twins, making them scream with laughter. We ran around in the yard, Ellie and I, trying to dodge Kenny with the water hose.

"He's gaining on us, Aunt Sophie!" Ellie screamed with laughter.

We had so much fun, splashing each other with water, I cursed myself for wearing a white top.

I suddenly saw that Donna wasn't in the yard anymore, and wondered where she went.

"Hey, kids. I'm just going to talk to your mom for second, okay?" I said, wiping my face clean of water.

"Okay." The kids said at the same time. I heard voices from the garage and I recognized my brother's voice.

"Gotta make a run." I heard my brother said and I knew it was for the club.

"What's in the bag?" Donna asked as Opie put on his cut.

"Nothing." Opie answered. I walked into the garage and took the bag out of his hand.

"Sophie, what are you doing!?" Opie exclaimed, trying to take the bag back.

"If you are attached to your nuts, don't fucking try." I growled before opening the bag.

I knew what this was. Opie was known for this shit. He was going to make explosives.

"What the fuck did Clay tell you to do?" I asked, throwing the bag on the floor.

"You promised me you were done." Donna said to her husband.

"This has nothing to do with you, Donna." Opie told her, making Donna angry.

"I'm the one who gets shit on if you get caught again." I could see where Donna came from with this. She must feel so helpless.

"It's not going to happen." Opie argued and I knew this would get out of control. I didn't want that for the kids.

"Opie. Think about what this will do to the kids. Why are you doing this?" I asked, trying to keep a low voice.

"They hurt you, Sophie and no one hurts my family." Opie told me and I knew Jax told him about the whole bottle thing.

"I don't need you to defend my honor, Opie. I can handle myself." I argued, and he looked at me.

"I know, and but I want to do this. I need to do this." Opie said and picked up his bag. I noticed the kids at the door and walked over to them, not wanting them to hear what's coming next. But I was too late.

"You sat in a cell for five years while Clay and the others got rich. They sold you out and you know that. You're just too weak to stand up to them."

Donna took the bag away from him and Opie tried to wrestle it out of her grip.

"You guys, stop it!" I tried to say, but they didn't listen.

I looked up and saw Jax coming into view, but I couldn't deal with that right now. Ellie and Kenny was my priority.

"Hey!" I yelled and finally got everyone's attention, including Jax's. Everyone stopped when they noticed the children. Both Opie and Donna looked broken when they saw the look on the twins' faces.

"Kids, why don't you go back inside and I'll join you soon. We're gonna make dinner together. The kids nodded and walked back inside the house. I looked at Opie, and the sad part, is that I could understand why he agreed to do this. It's not easy saying no to the club and he did it because he always promised that he would never let anyone hurt me. Donna didn't say anything and went after the twins. I just kept on standing there.

"Opie…" I started to say.

"I know, Sophie. I know I promised that I would stay away from this but. Those bastards didn't just blow up the warehouse. They hurt you too. And I made a promise to never let anyone hurt you. I need to do this." Opie told me. I felt a little torn and even though Donna is my best friend, Opie is my brother.

"Promise me you'll be careful. And don't get caught again, I will kill you if you do." I said, making things a little easier for him.

"Yeah. I promise." Opie said, hugging me.

Jax walked up to us.

"I didn't hear you pull up." Opie said to him.

"I parked down the block. I didn't want to tweak Donna." Jax said not taking his eyes off me for some reason.

"You catch all that?" Opie asked.

"Enough."

"I think she's already tweaked." Opie said with a sigh.

"Yeah. Stay here with Sophie and Donna. I'll handle this." Jax said, trying to take the bag away from him.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I don't show up. Clay'll chop off both our dicks." Opie exclaimed and sadly, it was true.

"Take your kid to the ER. Tell them she hit her head or something. Just get on record being there. I'll cover you with SAMCRO." Jax said. He didn't want to cause trouble for Opie at home.

"What about the boom?" Opie asked.

"I've watched you do it before. I'll call you on prepay if I need help." Jax told him and it made me warm inside.

"You sure about this?" Opie asked.

"Go face your family." Jax said. Before looking at me again. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

I really didn't want too, but for what he just did for Opie, I owed him that much.

"Go on, tell Ellie that she can start dinner. I'll be right there." I told Opie and he nodded, leaving us alone.

"What?" I asked a little harshly.

"Look, about last night…" Jax started to say, but I cut him off.

"What's done is done, Jax. I can't make you want to go see your son." I practically hissed.

"I know, but I had no right talking to you the way I did. I'm sorry. I deserved that slap." Jax told me and he was right.

"Yeah, you did. Probably should have taken off the rubber gloves first though." I said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, that kinda hurt." Jax said with the trademark grin of his. "Mom told me the surgery went well today."

"Yeah, I heard. That's good news, Jax." I said with a smile.

"I should probably get going now." Jax dragged out, waiting for a hug, so I gave him one.

"Yeah, I need to get back inside soon." I sighed, feeling content by being in his arms.

"Yeah, you probably should. I don't want other guys seeing you like this." Jax said and I couldn't understand what he was talking about.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, looking at him funny.

"Uhm. Your shirt."

That's when I remembered that my shirt is wet and you could totally see straight through it.

"Oh, dear God!" I exclaimed running towards the house, hearing Jax laugh as I ran through the door. That was so embarrassing, standing there with a see-through shirt. Idiot.

Donna peeked her head out of the kitchen. She looked so much happier now, it was all worth it.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

"Yeah… I just need to borrow a shirt from you." I answered and Donna couldn't stop laughing.

"Come on, Aunt Sophie! We are making dinner together!" I heard Ellie call happily.

I was just glad that they all could have a good night, and prayed that it would stay like this for a while.

* * *

I love the time I had with my family. Even dad came over for dinner, and we had a good time. He wasn't even angry at me for taking away his alcohol yesterday. He knew about the run the others were doing today, and it was good to have someone knowing what's going on with the hit.

Just as I helped put the kids to bed, when my phone rang.

 _"Hello?"_

* * *

 ** _"Hi, baby. It's me."_**

 _"Hey Gem. What's going on?"_

 ** _"They're almost finished with Abel's other surgery and I thought you might want to be here when Dr. Namid comes out."_**

 _"Yeah, I just put the kids to bed. I'll be there shortly."_

I hung up the phone and walked out to the living room where Opie and Donna was.

"Hey, everything go okay?" Donna asked, glad she didn't have to put the twins to bed.

"Yeah, everything went fine. They love me you know." I said, mocking their parenting skills.

"So not funny." Donna said and threw a pillow at me.

"Gemma just called me. Abel's second surgery is almost done, so I'm going back to the hospital now." I told them.

"Okay. Let us know how it goes?" Donna said, getting up to give me a hug.

"Yeah, sure."

"Hey, Sophie… thank you for today. The kids really love having you around." Opie said and I smiled a ruffled his hair.

"Yeah, it's a good thing I love being around them. Talk to you later, big brother." I said before walking out the door.

* * *

I drove towards the hospital, and my mind drifted to Jax and the others on this run. What if Jax got hurt, what if Jax died? Those were the thoughts running through my head.

Gemma was waiting for me at entrance of the hospital, and I hoped nothing had gone wrong.

"Gemma, is everything alright? Is Abel okay?" I asked in a rush.

"The doctor hasn't been here yet, I guess he'll be out here soon." Gemma said, pulling me in for a quick hug.

"That's good. I'm sure everything will be fine." I said, mostly to calm myself down for the most part. Gemma handed me a cup of coffee and we walked towards the waiting area to wait for news.

Just a few minutes later, Tara and Dr. Namid came out to talk to us.

"Is Abel okay?" Gemma asked.

"It was touch and go for a while, but the operation was successful." Dr. Namid said, and I felt myself let out a heavy breath.

"So he's okay?" I asked only to get it confirmed.

"Yes, everything is fine. He has a long way to go, but I think he's out of the woods for now." Dr. Namid confirmed, and I wanted to cry. I felt so protective of that little boy and I wanted nothing more than for him to be okay.

I looked over at Gemma and she looked just as relieved as I was.

"Can we see him?" She asked, and Dr. Namid said yes. I deliberately did not look at Tara. I didn't even acknowledge her and followed Gemma and Namid. When we reached the NICU, I felt anxious about seeing him. When I finally did, I felt this calmness over me. He already looked stronger and I know he would be okay.

I sat down in the rocking chair beside his incubator, watching over him like a hawk. Nothing was going to happen to this boy now. I'm not losing him like I lost Tommy.

"Hey… there's something I need to take care off. Are you okay here by yourself?" Gemma asked me.

"Oh, I'm not leaving his side tonight, so I'll be okay." I said, not taking my eyes off the little boy. Gemma kissed my forehead lovingly.

"Love you, baby girl." She said before leaving the room.

A little while later, the doctor came in to check on him, so I could go to the bathroom. Abel was in good hands for now. I know that I'm stepping over my boundaries with Abel, but I couldn't help myself.

As I walked out of the bathroom, I saw someone familiar coming down the hall. Jax came towards me and he looked completely exhausted.

"Is he going to be okay?" Jax asked about Abel and I couldn't help but smile.

"I've been sitting with him for a while and he looks good. The doctor said that his vitals are good and that he thinks that Abel will be just fine." I said with happy tears in my eyes.

Jax wrapped himself around me, hugging me tightly. That's when I noticed he flinched and I broke away from him, seeing him covered in blood.

"What happened to you, are you okay?" I asked, going over him frantically.

"Yes, I'm okay." He answered but I didn't really believe him.

"Come… let's clean you up before you'll meet your son, okay?" I said taking his hand. I brought him into the bathroom, bringing my bag with me. I wanted to clean up the cuts on his face properly, and give him another shirt. Luckily, I had one of Opie's in my car.

I sat on the counter in front of Jax, focusing on his cuts more than him. It felt so intimate somehow.

"There… now you look a little better." I whispered. Jax didn't move away from me and I felt a little caged in.

"Thank you for being there for Abel when I couldn't." Jax said full of emotions. "You didn't have to do that."

"Of course I did. He's your son, and that's all I need to know." I said, caressing his face softly. Jax let out a sigh and rested his forehead against mine. I could feel his breath on my lips, and this was the closest to kissing we have been since we lost our virginity to each other. I was still a little hesitant with taking that step and pulled back a little.

"Go change your shirt, your son is waiting for you." I said hoarsely, shivering from what just happened.

"Yeah." Jax stated, clearly a little frustrated. I jumped off the counter, walking towards the door as Jax took his ruined shirt off. He revealed his back tattoo, the mark of SOA and I hate how it makes me weak in the knees. That when I noticed the bruising on his skin. I let out a gasp, knowing that this was gunshot bruising.

"Jax… you promised you'd be careful." I exclaimed in a whisper, feeling my eyes water again.

"I was, I promise… besides. I had a bulletproof vest on. Everything's fine." Jax said like it was nothing and it made me angry and scared.

"It's not nothing, okay Jax. There's only one of you, and I can't lose you!" I ranted on and Jax embraced me to stop me from freaking out. His warm, shirtless body calmed me down somewhat.

"You're not going to lose me, Sophie. I'm right here." Jax said, stroking my hair. We stood like this for some time and I really didn't want to let him go. I reluctantly let him go, and looked up at him. My God, why must he be so gorgeous?

"Are you ready to see your son?" I asked and Jax took a shaky breath before nodding and putting on his shirt.

"Let's go then." I said holding my hand out for him to take. Jax intertwined our hands and we walked together out of the bathroom. I showed him the way to Abel's room, and it was getting harder and harder for Jax.

"He's in there, waiting for you." I said softly, pointing to one of the rooms. I was about to let go of his hand, when Jax stopped me.

"Come with me?" He pleaded me. "I want to share this with you."

I couldn't say no to his plead, it wouldn't be right.

"Okay, I'll come with you." I agreed.

I opened the door for us and Jax walked in first, not letting go of my hand. When he finally saw, his son laying there in the incubator, everything changed for him. Jax looked at this little creature in awe.

I could see the tears falling down his cheeks, but I didn't say anything. I just leaned against his shoulder, taking it all in.

Gemma joined us just then, happy that I finally made Jax coming to see Abel. She stood beside me, caging me in between her and Jax.

"He's perfect." Gemma whispered and it was true. This boy is perfect…

Both of them.

* * *

 **There it is!  
**

 **I hope you liked it and that it made sense for you.**

 **I couldn't figure out how old Wendy was, so I just made up something. The same with the kids. I have no idea, but that's the beauty of fanfics.**

 **It was hard, trying to figure out what Sophie would be doing for a living. There's so many stories out there about OC's being surgeons and stuff like that. I didn't want my OC to be just like that... Not that it's something wrong about the stories that do go like that. They are good stories!**

 **So I figured she would be successful with her own company/organization, working with the research team at the hospital. I know I wrote that she has a medical degree, but that's only because she wanted more knowledge about the field.**

 **Please tell me what you thought of this chapter!**

 **Until next time!**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***SOAROCKS: Thank you so much! I hope this lived up to your expectations!**

 ***MissTeller-Ortiz-Dixon: I'm glad you like the two of the together. It means I'm doing something right. I am not a very big fan of Tara's character in the series at all. I think Jax forgave her for leaving way too easily. Gemma and Sophie has a strong realtionship, with her being Sophie godmother and all.**

 ***cbrienza: I know. I was also in tears when I wrote that part.**

 ***Emmettluver: Thank you! Sophie will end up pregnant later, but she didn't get pregnant when she was 14. It didn't fit with the story, but we all know she will be pregnant eventually.**

 ***guest: Thank you so much! Here's the update!**

 ***xxcuriousmexx: Thank you! They will talk about it eventually, but it will be a huge blow out, somewhere down the line.**

 ***Foreverkee: Thank you so much! Here's the next part!**

 ***bethie86: Here you go! Good you didn't have to wait too long!**


	5. Just a Little Heartache

**I'm back with the next chapter!**

 **It took me a few weeks, but I'm switching updates between two stories, so, now that I've updated the other one, I had time to finish this.**

 **I tried to make you happy, and wrote a long chapter this time too.**

 **I have a lot of fun writing it, and I hope you'll enjoy reading.**

 **Please tell me what you think!**

 _ **I do not own "SOA" only my OC.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 **Just a Little Heartache**

I didn't spend the night at the hospital again. Jax convinced me to go home and sleep in my own bed. Not that I wanted to leave Abel, but it sounded kind of nice to sleep in my own bed. Before I left the hospital, I got the news that Wendy overdosed and almost died. I couldn't quite figure out how she got her hands on the drugs in the first place.

When I woke up in the morning, I had a message from Gemma, telling me to stop by the Auto Shop, so that we could plan the upcoming charity event. And since I've told my second in command that I'll be gone for a few days, this was a great opportunity to get some planning done.

I took a shower, and I couldn't help but think about the moment Jax and I had last night. The way we held each other, the way I was too scared to kiss him again, thinking that he would be angry with me.

* * *

Today was a warm day, so I decided on jean shorts and a simple white tank top , which fitted my curves perfectly. I put my leather jacket on along with my ballerina shoes and grabbed my sunglasses. I was ready for the day.

On my way to the club, I stopped on the local bakery to buy some coffee and something to eat.

"Well, you're a sight for sore eyes." I heard a voice behind me.

"I could say the same about you." I said, turning around to face the one talking to me.

"Hello, princess." Bobby told me.

"Hello, Bobby. I missed you yesterday." I said giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Yeah, I had a playing gig I had to do. So, where are you going this fine morning?" Bobby asked me.

"I am actually going to the shop. Gemma and I are doing some finishing touches on the charity event coming up. You're still doing the Elvis booth, right?" I said, counting on him.

"Of course, my love. Now, get out of my way, woman. Or you'll get some very hungry muffin-lovin' bikers on your ass." Bobby said and I laughed so hard.

"You're weird…" I said kissing his cheek. "I'll see you at the shop." I said before walking away.

"See you later, Princess." Bobby called after me.

I was about to jump into my car, when someone came up behind me.

"I heard you got into it with the Mayans recently." I would've recognized that voice anywhere, and I let out a groan.

"What do you want, David?" I asked turning around and saw Charming's Deputy Chief, David Hale. Oh, did I mention that I went on a date with him in High School? I was just so fed up with seeing Jax running around with Tara, breaking my heart repeatedly. So, when David asked me out on a date, I said yes. You could say that the date was a disaster, ending with Jax punching him in the face for taking me out in the first place.

After Jax did that, I froze him out for a few days, refusing to talk to him. But then Tara left Charming about two weeks later, and Jax needed his friend again, and I couldn't stand watching him hurting in such a way.

Hale stood there proudly in his uniform, making himself seem more important than he is.

"Nothing special, Sophie. Just wanted to see how you're doing." Hale said with that creepy smirk of his.

"I'm totally fine, thanks for asking." I replied, trying to open my car door, but he stopped me.

"Do you know anything about that warehouse blowing up just right outside of town?" Hale asked me as if he was questioning me in an investigation. I knew that it belonged to the club, due to their gun trafficking business, but there was no chance in hell, I would rat the club.

"I heard about it… saw it on my way home, but I don't know how it happen. Was it a gas leak?" I answered, trying to act all innocent.

"Come on now, Sophie. You and I both know the truth. That warehouse belongs to the Sons, and there's guns involved." Hale told me and I just lost it.

"Am I under arrest?" I asked quickly.

"No, of course not." Hale said, feeling a little flushed.

"Then with all due respect, deputy chief Hale." I spat, getting into his personal space, knowing he was still a little smitten with me. "I don't have to answer anything. Don't bother me again."

With that, I opened the door and got it. Why did he have to talk to me? He knew very well that I have been out of the club business for years. What the hell did I know?!

I can't believe I went on a date with him.

I tried to get the anger for Hale out of my head and turned on my radio. I secretly haven't given up on the love of the 80's and had programmed it to a station only playing good old 80's hits.

Rick Springfield's **_Jessie's Girl_** blasted through my speakers and I sang at the top of my voice, glad that no one knew about my obsession with Rick Springfield.

* * *

I pulled in at Teller-Morrow Garage, parking next to Gemma's car. It was still early in the morning and the Auto Shop had just come to life.

I walked out of my car, and the first one I saw, was Chibs.

"Hey there, lassie! How are you?" He asked, hugging me close to him.

"Hey, Chibs. I'm doing all right. I just played the deputy chief before I got here, and it was sweet as hell." I told him and Chibs started laughing.

"That's my girl! No one better than you to mess Hale up on a fine morning like this." Chibs said with a laugh.

I looked up and saw Jax working on a car inside the shop, and I didn't know what to do at first. But then I got to thinking… he's not a stranger, and I wanted to know what he thought about last night. I kissed Chibs' cheek and waved at Kip before walking up to Jax.

Jax locked his gaze on me, and it made my heart go crazy. That trademark smirk of his came forward as I stopped in front of him.

"Hey Jax." I said with a smile.

"Good morning, Sophie. How did you sleep?" Jax asked, leaning against the car.

"Honestly? I feel asleep right as I walked through the door. So thank you for talking me into going home." I told him, feeling more at ease.

"Yeah, I know you wanted to stay at the hospital with Abel, but you've done so much for him already." Jax said and I couldn't help but blush.

"Like I told you before… I'll always be there for him. For you." I said with no hesitation. Jax just stood there, looking at me. Jax brought me in for a hug. I inhaled his scent deeply, he smelled like cigarettes, motor oil and cologne. Just the way I liked it.

"Thank you." Jax whispered in my ear.

"You're welcome." I whispered back as Bobby drove into the yard. Jaxson reluctantly let me go.

"I've got the good shit!" Bobby yelled, holding up a brown paper bag. I couldn't help but laugh.

"You go, I'll go get the coffee." I said patting Jax on the shoulder. I could feel the guys eyes on me as I walked towards the clubhouse. Gemma was standing outside waiting for me.

"Damn, girl. Are you trying to make my boy have a heart attack?" She asked gesturing to my outfit.

"What? I just threw on the first thing I found in my closet this morning." I said all innocent.

"Yeah, and I'm crapping rainbows." Gemma said, rolling her eyes. I grabbed the pot of coffee and walked towards the Church where the boys were gathering around Bobby's breakfast. Or if you can call it breakfast.

* * *

"There we go, boys!" Bobby said placing the muffins on the table.

"Oh, these muffins are great with tequila, Bobby." I heard my father said as I walked through the door. I grabbed the shot and forced it out of his hand.

"Sophie!" He exclaimed.

"No,no, no, no! No booze before noon." I said, slamming the cup in front of him. "Stick to coffee."

Everyone stared at us, knowing that this was completely normal way for dad and me to act around each other. I walked over to my brother and gave him a hug. It seemed as if he and Donna had a good night yesterday and I wanted to help them as much as I could.

"Well." Chibs said to break the tension. "This shit's addictive turning me into a fat bastard."

"Turbinado sugar, organic flour, no processed shit. Not that any of you besides Sophie cares." Bobby said, knowing how difficult it was to get the boys to eat and drink healthy.

"You put hash in them?" Jax asked and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. That boy is insufferable.

"You know my rule. No bud before 9:00 a.m." Bobby told him.

"I don't have that rule." Jax said with a smirk before looking at me.

"Morning kids!" Clay boomed at he walked through the doors. "Deal with the Niners has officially closed. Spoke to Laroy, and he is giddy about his new assault rifles."

"Like we're all about radical harmony." Chibs said as he received his envelope full of cash.

"Spend it wisely, boys. Might be a while before we see any more gun green." Clay said and handed me an envelope as well for my service at the club concerning injuries.

"I love the green! All about the Benjamins!" Chibs exclaimed happily.

I looked at my brother, knowing he lost some money from not helping the club yesterday, and gave it to him, knowing he needed it.

"Here, take it. You need it more than I do." I said, putting the envelope in his front pocket. Opie looked as if he wanted to argue, but I wouldn't hear it. I wanted to help my family as much as I could. So, by giving him my share, it felt great.

"Thank you, Soph… I love you so much." Opie said hugging me tightly one more time.

"You're my brother. I'll do anything for you." I whispered back. "And I love you too."

Just then, one of the members, Juice, came in with some news.

"I just got an update from my city hall snitch. Looks like Hale's got a warrant to search our warehouse." Juice said and I let out a loud groan.

"What?" Clay said, eyeing me suspiciously.

"Hale came up to me this morning, when I went out on my caffeine run. He asked me about the warehouse, but I said nothing. But by saying nothing, I may have pissed him off instead." I answered, feeling a little guilty. I looked up at Jax and he just gave me a reassuring look. They didn't blame me for this. Clay walked over to me, placing that big cigar-smelling hand on my cheek.

"You did the best you could, Princess… Now get out of here so we can have a meeting." Clay said, kissing my cheek.

Jax looked a little troubled by me leaving but he agreed with it, when he saw his mother standing there waiting for me.

"How was the meeting?" Gemma asked, putting her arm around my shoulders.

"Well… Like you would expect, I think." I said, leaning my head against Gemma's embrace. She let out a chuckle and showed me into her office where she had all the papers for the upcoming charity event.

"You know, if my son doesn't get his head out of his ass soon, I am afraid that he will lose you forever." Gemma told me as I sat down at her desk.

"He won't lose me, Mama Gem." I said, going through some pages in front of me.

"And why is that?" Gemma asked, looking at me intently.

"Because I made a promise." I answered, looking directly into her eyes.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Sheriff Trammel was still investigating the crime scene. Not knowing how to deal with the two dead bodies. He had to wait for the Sons' to figure out how to deal with this. As he looked down at the two bodies in the basement of some sort, he heard cars pulling up. He knew it was from the Charming district.

"Shit!" Trammel said under his breath, trying to figure out what to do.

"You're a little outside your jurisdiction, aren't you, Hale?" Trammel said, trying to play it cool.

"Well, something blows up this close to your town, it would be bad law enforcement not to look into it." Hale answered him.

"Well, this is county property. 'Sanwa' sheriffs can handle this." Trammel told him.

"You know this guy, Rodrigo Carpio? Found him in the debris basin. Three bullets in his back. Bluebird Supply business card in his wallet. From his rap sheet , I' guessing he was employed as security." Hale told said.

"No kidding?" Trammel exclaimed not really meaning it.

"He died 50 yards inside Charming. Bluebird warehouse is part of my murder investigation. And that's a warrant. In case you've never actually seen one." Hale poked the warrant against Trammel's chest and started to look around.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

After working with Gemma for a while, I started to get a little anxious and needed to stretch my legs.

"Why don't you go outside while I cover up on some unfinished business?" Gemma asked and I couldn't agree more.

I stepped outside, enjoying the sunshine, taking a smoke. Yes… I occasionally had a cigarette, and I needed one today. I looked up and saw the Sons coming towards the Auto Shop.

"Glad your boy's gonna be all right." Clay said, and it made my heart clench.

"Yeah, thanks." Jax replied. "I'm sorry about last night. I should've had that place leveled before the Mayans ever got there. Made a shit call."

"Yeah, I'm the one who should've been there blowing the shit up. Should've never gone to Tahoe." Bobby shot in, and I knew he was frustrated.

"You know what? Everything happens for a reason. We hadn't hit that warehouse, we never would've known about the Nord-Mayan hookup." Clay said and I stood there like an outsider, wanting to know what was going on. Gemma came back into the office with some paperwork.

"Gotta get this shit to Rosen's guy. Need a big Jew brain to figure out these Bluebird losses." Gemma told us.

"Not this big Jew brain, baby. I can barely count my own fingers." Bobby said before exiting the office.

"Gonna go see the kid later." Jax told his mother.

"Okay, I'll be there. And I still wanna do that dinner. Maybe tomorrow night." Gemma told her son.

"Sure." Jax said and saw me standing there with a smoke in my hand.

"Are you all right, Sophie?" He asked me, but I didn't even give him a second glance. Jax brought his hand up to my chin and force me to look at him.

"I am trying my best." I said, trying not to look directly into his eyes.

"Sophie, come on… what's wrong?" Jax asked me and I wasn't sure how to deal with it.

"Nothing… I just wanted to take a smoke, that's all." I told him a lie. I wanted to tell him something else, but I didn't know how. The way Jax looked at me, told me that he knew that I was lying.

"Come on. You know you can tell me anything." Jax said, giving me that smile I can't resist.

"It's just that when Hale stopped me earlier, it felt very uncomfortable. Standing so close to me, eyeing me like a piece of meat." I said, trying to not seem affected by it. "I told him to basically go to hell, but... I'm not sure he got the hint."

"That's my girl." Jax said, kissing my forehead.

"I try." I said nonchalantly, making Jax chuckle.

"Do you want to come with me and visit Abel today?" Jax asked to get something else on my mind. I really wanted to.

"I think I will go with Gemma when she's going. I can't abandon our project, it doesn't seem fair." I said with a shrug.

"Okay. I'll see you later." Jax said, kissing my cheek. I thought that I would fall down because of my shaky legs.

"Yeah, I'll see you." I mumbled after Jax disappeared. I turned around and looked at Gemma. She only shook her head.

"Smooth, baby girl, smooth." She said, laughing a little by my behavior. "How old are you again?"

"Shut up, grandma." I said, blushing even harder.

I looked up and saw Tig standing there deep in thought. He really looked troubled, so I decided to talk to him.

"Hey, Princess." Tig said, not even commenting on my looks, nothing. Don't get me wrong. I'm not vain but Tig's a straight up pig. He always gives those sleazy comments and I've grown used to them.

"Whoa! Who fucked you over this time, Tig?" I asked, chuckling a little.

"Trust me sweetheart, you don't wanna know." Tig said.

"Who did you fuck over?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. Before Tig could answer, Clay walked our way.

"That was Unser. Got a protection run tonight." Clay said as he walked passed us. Tig didn't answer him and looked all kinds of guilty.

"What?" Clay asked, knowing what Tig could do.

"I gotta tell you something, man. I mean, it could be bad." Tig said. That didn't sound good at all.

"It already is." Clay told him with a sigh.

"Those two dead Mexicans in the warehouse hall… I was hitting them." Tig said and I couldn't help but slap my forehead.

"Jesus Christ. Both of them?"

"Oh yeah. Yeah. Kind of a taco 'twofer' thing." Tig answered and I shuttered under my breath.

"God! Tig, you jackass!" I exclaimed, not wanting to hear about it anymore.

"Tell me one of them doesn't have a bellyful of tigger juice." Clay said in a low dangerous voice.

"Afraid they both do." Tig said as it wasn't a big deal.

"You did time, shithead. You are in the DNA database. Forensic team get a hold of those bodies."

"I'll go pull them out of there." Tig argued.

"I talked to Hale earlier today…he's gonna be watching that warehouse day and night." I told the two of them.

"Well, maybe Trammel can sneak me in, you know. He's a County Sheriff. He outranks the local P.D., right?" Tig asked.

"Oh, you're just going to stroll out of there with two dead Mexican whores draped over your shoulders?"

"I'll gut them dead bitches. I'll flush their bellies with bleach. No DNA." Tig said like it was nothing. Clay just shook his head and walked away. Tig looked at me, to see if I was repulsed, which I was.

"What kind of nasty shit did your mama do to you?" I said disgusted.

"What do you mean?" Tig asked not being fazed by what he just said.

"You're sick, Tig. Completely and utterly sick." I said before walking away.

"That shouldn't come as a shock, Princess. You know how I roll!" Tig called after me and I know that it was true.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Jax hated the fact of leaving Sophie behind today. Somehow, he wanted to make sure she was safe, no matter what. When Sophie told him about Hale, he wanted to rip someone's face straight off. He knew that she didn't have anything to do with the warehouse, so it was low for Hale to seek her out.

Jax rode his bike down the street, stopping for a red light as a jeep rolled up beside him. He cursed himself when he saw Hale in the front seat.

"How you're doing, Jax? Heard about Wendy and the baby. I'm sorry." Hale told him.

"Thanks." Jax said, trying not to show any emotion.

"You know, I took a ride out to the streams today. Saw the warehouse that burned down." Hale said, and he got on Jax's nerves.

"Outside of your jurisdiction, ain't it?" Jax asked him, before speeding down the streets.

Hale had no trouble catching up with him and kept on talking to him.

"Did you ever hear of a Bluebird Supply Company? Apparently they hold the title on that parcel." Hale told him.

"Never heard of them." Jax yelled back, tried to keep his attention on the road.

"Whole area was littered with casings and gun parts. That warehouse was a weapons depot." Hale said.

"No kidding." Jax replied sarcastically.

"Chief Unser's retiring at the end of this month. I'll be stepping into those shoes. Unser always had a 'look the other way' policy with the Sons of Anarchy."

"Unser's a lazy drunk." Jax argued.

"I will not look the other way, Jax. Just a friendly heads-up." Hale told him.

"We're all free men protected by the constitution. You look any way you want, Chief. But if you as much as talk to Sophie regarding these things or anything else , I would love to give a repeat of that dating disaster a few years ago." Jax said, before speeding down the street.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I sat by the bar in the Club House, making some calls to my company, making sure that everything was going according to plan about the fundraiser next month. I loved the silence in here when the Sons were working in the garage. Some of the sweet butts, the croweater, moved around the room, trying to be useful stocking up the bar for tonight. I tried not to be affected by the stares they gave me. There's no secret that they liked it better those years I stayed away because of Donna and the kids. They hated me and the relationship I had with the Sons. As if they were extremely jealous.

Me, I didn't give a fuck about them, and luckily, they respected me enough, not to make my life a living hell.

A cup of coffee was placed in front of me. I looked up, seeing Kip standing there in front of me.

"I would've asked you if you wanted one, but I didn't want to disturb you." Kip told me a little shy. He was such a sweet little boy. I felt the urge to protect him somehow.

"Thank you, Kip. And I wouldn't have tried to bite your head off, if you had asked me." I told him with a smile.

A cough alerted me that my father was entering the clubhouse. He walked over, sitting down next to me.

"So. Any hard feelings for taking that bottle away from you this morning?" I asked, looking at my father.

"No. I know why you did it, but I'm a grown man, Sophie. I can take care of myself." Dad said, and grabbed a smoke. As he inhaled, he started coughing.

"Are you sure about that?" I asked with pity in my voice. "Dad. This lifestyle is killing you. I can't lose you yet. I'm not ready. You're the only father I have."

"I know sweetheart. But this is my life. This is how I chose to live it." Dad argued.

"I know it's your life, but I would like to see you be a part of my life a little longer. I may be almost 30, but I still need my father in my life. Don't be the reason I'll lose him too soon." I said sadly, kissing his cheek.

"I have to go. I'm going to the hospital with Gemma, to see Abel. I'll see you later." I said, before gathering my things.

"Okay, sweetheart. I'll see you later." Dad replied as I walked out of the clubhouse.

* * *

Gemma was waiting for me at her car, and she knew that I must have talked to my dad.

"Did your old man give you trouble again?" Gemma asked me.

"I guess. It's just hard to see him throwing his life away like he does. He's carrying around an oxygen tank, and smokes like a chimney, and drinks like his life depends on it. It's not good for him. But he's my dad, I still love him." I said with a sigh.

"He may be your father, sweetheart, but he's a dumbass." Gemma said, trying to make me feel better.

"Thanks, Mama Gem." I replied as I felt her kissing the side of my head.

"Let's go see that grandson of mine." Gemma said, jumping into her car.

I couldn't wait to see that little boy again. In this short time, I felt so connected to that little boy.

There ride to the hospital didn't take long. But when we got there, it was utter chaos. Cars everywhere.

"Shit. How the fuck are you going to find a damn parking space in this piece of shit?" Gemma exclaimed in the only way Gemma Teller-Morrow could. "Why don't you go on ahead and see Abel. I'll catch up with you."

"Okay, Gem." I said, jumping out of the car. I walked as quickly as I could towards the sliding doors of the hospital, anxious to see little Abel again, wondering how his night was. I reached the floor in no time, ready to see the kid. I walked around the corner, waving at the nurses as I passed by. I was about to approach the NICU, when I heard the voices of Tara and Jax. I stopped, not wanting to intrude on the two of them.

"What?" I heard Tara ask.

"Just figured you'd land a million miles from this place. You always hated it here." Jax told her.

"No, I didn't hate Charming, Jax. Just me in it at the time. And let's face it, I never got along with Sophie that well. We really got on each other's nerves, you know." Tara said, sitting down next to Jax. "Looks like Wendy's gonna be okay."

"Define okay." Jax said, rolling his eyes.

"We're taking her through sedated detox. She'll be out for a couple of days. You two, are you back together?" Tara asked him.

"No. I filed over a year ago, knowing that I went into the relationship with her for all the wrong reasons." Jax said vaguely. "She got clean about 10 months back. And for some stupid reason, we tried to reconcile. Didn't work out too well."

"Well, looks like one good thing came out of it." Tara said with a smile.

"Yeah." Jax dragged out with a sigh. Tara cleared her throat.

"So, how are things with you and Sophie?" Tara asked and I held my breath.

"It's… complicated. She's my best friend, you know. She's always there, not judging me. She's the purest person I know." Jax said honestly.

Purest person he knows? What the fuck does he mean by that? I asked myself.

"It's funny, I would've thought that she'd be your old lady by now." Tara said with a little laugh. Jax looked at Tara as if someone had burned him. He wanted to say something, but instead, he stood up.

"I have to go." Jax said without giving Tara a second glance.

"Sure… I'm late for rounds anyway." Tara mumbled. I didn't want Jax to see me, so as the coward as I was, I turned toward the nurse's station and pretended to examine some charts. The nurses looked at me oddly, not understanding what I was doing.

"What? Have you never seen someone being pathetic before?" I asked them, blushing a little as I said so.

* * *

I watched Jax walking into Wendy's bedroom down on the other side of the glass door. I decided not to go in and disturb him, so I took a deep breath and walked into Abel's room.

"Hey Rosie." I said to the nurse, looking at his chart. Rosie is a sweet and all through good woman, and a good nurse. She knows her stuff, and always has a smile on her face.

"Hey, Sophie. I thought I would see you here this morning when I got to work." Rosie said.

"No, Jax convinced me to go home and sleep in my own bed." I said, gazing at the little boy inside the incubator. "How is he?"

"He's doing all right. Dr. Knowles and Dr. Namid said that his vitals are up and that he will be taken out of the incubator in a few weeks' time." Rosie told me.

"That's good. Not that I had any doubts about him. He's a Teller after all." I said with a grin.

"And from what I've gathered, he should've been half Winston too." Rosie said, making me blush.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, feeling my pulse rising. "

Well, I'm not a fool, Sophie. That handsome boy of ours, loves you. He's just afraid to show it." Rosie said with a laugh, patting my shoulder.

"How can you be so sure?" I asked in defeat, knowing there was point denying it.

"Because that's the way my husband looks at me every time I get home from work, or simply walking into a room. And he's been looking at me like that for the last 30 years. That look that made me pregnant 5 times." Rosie said, pinching my cheeks.

"Don't be afraid to tell him how you feel, sweetheart." Rosie said, before leaving the room, and I was alone with Abel.

Maybe Rosie was right... Maybe I should just tell Jax about my feelings. If it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be, at least, then I can move on with my life.

Gemma came in just then.

"Where's Jackson?" She asked, before kissing the incubator.

"You just missed him, talking to Tara." I said with a sigh.

"That bitch will do anything to worm his way into Jax's life again." Gemma growled.

"Hey! No swearing in front of your grandson. I don't want his first words to be bitch, or fucking bastard." I said in a whisper.

Gemma couldn't help but laugh at me.

"You're a funny one." Gemma said, nudging my shoulder.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Donna was looking through the bills, trying to figure out what to do with all of them. She looked down on the check Sophie had given her the day before. The check she wrote out to use on the kids, on their education, when it came to that.

How was she going to be able to pay the bills and send her kids to college?

Opie came through the door, as she packed the bills together.

"I'm going to need the truck." Donna told him.

"Why can't you take the wagon?" Opie asked her.

"We're three months behind. I gotta lock it in the garage or they'll repo it while I'm at work." Donna said, showing him the bill for the car.

"I don't know how I'm going to get in front of this shit." Opie said, taking out the envelope with the envelope Sophie had given him earlier. Her payment from the club. "Sophie gave me this today. She told me I needed it more. I kind of wanted to save it, so we could do something together with the kids. Or buy food. We're getting buried here, Donna."

"I'll pick up some weekend work. You'll get that pay bump soon." Donna said, fishing out the check she got from Sophie.

"What's this?" Opie asked.

"Your sister gave it to me, yesterday. I told her I didn't want it but she told me to put it into a fund for Kenny and Ellie. Now, we could be bad parents and use the money and many of our troubles would go away." Donna said, feeling like crap for taking money from her kids. Opie took the check from her hands, putting it back in the drawer.

"First thing tomorrow morning, we're gonna cash those money, and put it into the kids' bank account, and not think of it again." Opie told his wife. There was no chance in hell, that he would take money from his children and in that moment, Donna saw the man she met all those years ago.

"We're gonna make it through this, baby. I promise." Donna said, kissing her husband.

"Yeah, we'll figure it out." Opie agreed, knowing that he wasn't so sure about it.

* * *

After spending some time with his wife, Opie met up with his father downtown instead of going to work.

"You look like crap." Opie told him.

"Yeah, I disappointed Sophie again, you know how it is. But shouldn't you be at the mill?" Piney asked his son.

"I'm on my way. I gotta ask a favor." Opie answered.

"Well, what's up?"

"We're three months behind on Donna's car payment. They're gonna repo it. Now I hate doing this…" Opie started but Piney cut him off.

"If you're gonna ask me for money, I can't help you. I just made the quarterly insurance payments. I'm gonna be tapped until the end of next month, okay? Look, I'm sorry, son. I know you don't like it, but talk to your sister…"

"That's all right… I don't want to ask for anything else from her. She provided for my family for five years. I can't ask for more. Thanks, Pop." Opie answered with a sigh.

"Hey. Clay… is making a protection run tonight for Unser. It's low-profile shit. You ride along, scare off the bad guys, huh?" Piney suggested to his son.

"I think I'm on Clay's shitlist. Doubt he'd put me on it." Opie told him.

"Well, then why don't you make it right?" Piney argued.

"I don't know."

"I don't know what the hell's wrong with you. Why don't you quit whining, grow a dick, and take care of your business?" Piney told him off before he rode off.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I stayed in the hospital with Gemma for a few hours, and it did us both some good. I loved seeing a difference in that little boy, this could only mean it was going in the right direction.

"We have some business to take care off back at the shop, do you want to come with me?" Gemma asked me, tearing my eyes away from Abel.

"Yeah, I might as well. I don't know what those boys are up to, but I have some unfinished calls I need to make for the benefit next month." I answered, walking after Gemma out the door.

"You know, you are doing a good job with that benefit, it feels as if you are doing all the work." Gemma said, wrapping her arm around me.

"I love doing it, and I want it to go well." I told her as we walked towards the elevator.

As we came to the waiting area, Tara made herself ready to leave. I could not catch a break! Why did I have to take the elevator with her of all people?

"Gemma." Tara said, making her way up to us.

"Abel seems better. Stronger." Gemma said as a hello to her.

"Yeah. He's a lucky kid. Both he and his mom escaped death on the same night." Tara told us in an accusing tone. Oh, I wanted to smack her.

"Yeah. I heard about Wendy. Very sad." Gemma said, and even I knew it was sarcastically. "I can't say I'm surprised."

Gemma and I tried to leave after that but Tara wouldn't let us.

"Guess you wouldn't be." Tara said rolling her eyes and I went for it.

"Something on your mind, Tara?" I asked, towering just a little over her.

"No, something weighing on yours?" She shot back, making me see red.

"Did Wendy tell you something?" I asked, trying not to put my weight on it and hit her square in the face.

"No, she's still sedated. But I talked to her after that baby was born. She was crushed. She hated herself, but she wanted to live. No, somebody else popped her with that needle." Tara said, mainly looking at me. "Or, at the very least, gave her a loaded gun."

I walked towards her, out to kill.

"You know, about the same time as Wendy may have gotten that needle, I was babysitting Abel and when I wasn't in that room, I took care of Jax in the bathroom." I said whispered in her ear, making it sounds like I was doing something more than to clean him up. I turned around and walked away.

"I'm taking the stairs." I called out before slamming the door open with great force. There was no way in fresh hell, I would take the same elevator as her.

I actually made it down faster than Gemma and I kept on pacing back and forth, taking my second cigarette for the day. Tara is messing with my nerves.

"Easy there, tiger." I heard Gemma say. "Great comeback to Tara by the way. Shit just got real."

"Was it you?" I asked bluntly, knowing that Gemma excused herself last night to go fix something. Gemma didn't say anything which meant, she didn't deny it.

"That was a risky thing to do, Mama Gem." I told her as we drove down the road from the hospital.

"Yeah, well… what's done, is done. Isn't?" Gemma said, her eyes never leaving the road.

"I talked to her, you know. That night that I went over to Jax's house to clean. She told me that she caved because she knew he was settling with her. That he always compared her to someone else." I told her, feeling I needed to tell someone about it.

"Well, yeah. We all know he compared her to you." Gemma said, as if it wasn't a big deal. "Him marrying her, was just him acting out about the fact that you decided to step away from the club when Opie was locked up. He couldn't handle that. This shouldn't surprise you."

Hearing those words from Gemma, made it all truer. And with what Rosie told me earlier, I decided that I would tell him the truth, tell him that I loved him. I decided to do it as soon as we arrived at the shop. If I didn't tell him then, I would lose my nerve.

"Thank you, Gemma." I said with a soft smile.

"All for you, sweetheart." Gemma smiled back at me and we didn't talk the rest of the way back to the shop.

* * *

As we stopped the car, I could tell that the boys were here for now, so I knew that it was now or never.

I walked into the bathroom, trying to freshen up a bit. This could be the start of something new, or something that should have started years ago, but it made the butterflies in my stomach go wild.

I looked at myself in the mirror one last time. I looked good, or I thought I did and made my way over to the clubhouse. My heart was beating so fast, but I decided to put myself out there, finally.

I walked into the house, and Dana, one of the nicest croweaters was the first I saw.

"Hey, Dana." I said almost giddy.

"Hey, Sophie." She said with a wave.

"Hey, is Jax here?" I asked, looking around.

"Yeah… he went to take a shower, but he hasn't been back for some time now." Dana answered and it couldn't get any better than this. He was alone in the apartment. I walked determent towards the apartment, knowing that my life could change forever when I finally opened that door. I took a deep breath, knocked on the door and opened it.

"Hey Jax, can I talk…." I started to say, but stopped when I saw what was happening before my eyes. There, on the bed, Jax was pounding away at some blond bimbo.

"Oh, shit! Sophie." Jax said, removing himself from croweater or whatever she was.

"I am so sorry. For barging in here." I said, turning around to not show my tears.

"Sophie." Jax said again but I just shook my head.

"I am such an idiot." I said under my breath, knowing that he could hear it. With that I walked away, tears pouring down my face.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

 _Earlier that day._

Jax had just arrived back at the clubhouse, ready for Church.

Jimmy Cacuzza called. The Italians want to place an order. I didn't know what to say." Bobby told them.

"How about, 'the store burned down, they missed the fire sale?" Clay asked sarcastically.

"Well, I talked to Otto's sister, and Lodi forensics team will be here first thing in the morning." Juice told them.

"And the shit keeps on piling on my head." Clay said with a groan, sitting down at the head of the table. Only one thing is gonna stop that Lodi forensics team from getting to our warehouse, and that's another murder in Lodi."

"I don't know." Jax said, not sure about all of this. "Hale's on red alert. Mayans, Nords. Everyone is twitchy as hell, man. It's not a good time to kill…"

"It's never a good time. We're talking about protecting Tig and staying out of A.T.F's crosshairs." Clay talked back to him. "We hit the projects. We find ourselves a scumbag, a dealer…"

"We should off a couple of Nords, Clay, is what we should do. All right?" Tig said, knowing that this mess was mostly his fault. "We should just do that, and then dump the bodies in Lodi. It buys us time to get those Mexicans out of the hole. It sends a message to Darby. Kill two birds with one Crow."

"Very clever. With the cops eyeballing the warehouse?" Chibs shot in.

"Doesn't matter."

"I'll handle that, you set it up." Clay told Tig.

"Hey!" Jax called to stop Tig from leaving.

"What if I could do this without spilling blood? Look, this isn't me tripping some guilt shit because of my kid. This is about one of us thinking straight. Brains before bullets, right?" Jax told them and got them to listen.

"Let's hear it." Clay agreed.

"All we need for a murder are bodies and a crime scene." Jax explained.

"Jackie boy, now you lost me." Chibs said, looking like a question mark.

"Skeeter – he's always got more gambling debt than he can handle. I'll make it worth his while." Jax said proudly.

"The cemetery guy?" Bobby shot in.

"Cash for cadavers. Like it." Chibs said with a smirk. This is just the right amount of fucked up he liked.

"I give Lodi a front-page murder. We don't stir up another shit storm to bite us in the ass."

"What about educating Darby?" Tig asked.

"I'll figure that out. The important thing is to keep your D.N.A out of the petri dish. Protect the club." Answered him, looking at Clay for approval.

"Path of least resistance always best, right?" Clay asked and no one argued. "We'll do it your way, V.P."

"Don't make me regret this." Clay told only for Jax's ears and he hated that Clay had so little faith that he could do this shit.

* * *

Jax brought Chibs, Juice and the new kid to the cemetery to meet with Skeeter. He was a train wreck, with no goals in life. Why else would you work in a place like this?

"They really cremate bodies in here?" Half-Sack asked looking around the place.

"Yeah, we do." Chibs answered pushing the poor bastard inside.

"Hey guys! What's… What's going on?" Skeeter asked nervously.

"We need a favor, Skeeter." Jax told him.

"Christ, man. Now is not a good time. I got a new supervisor crawling up my ass." Skeeter told them.

"Relax. Not here to make a deposit." Jax told him a little amused.

"Actually, it's a withdrawal." Chibs said, pulling Half-Sack away from the ovens.

"We need two bodies, fresh." Jax told him, gaining a surprised look from Skeeter.

"You serious? For what?"

"Well, I could tell you, but then I'd have to stuff you in the furnace." Jax said with a smile on his face.

"Two dead ones. That's… that's crazy shit, man." Skeeter said a little uncomfortable.

"I'm sure you took a beating at Golden Gate this weekend?" Jax asked and gave him a envelope filled with cash.

"No, I-I stopped the ponies, man. I stopped it all." Skeeter told them. "Gamblers Anonymous. Three months now."

"You're kidding? You don't want the money?" Jax asked amused.

"Working the program, you know?"

"Jesus Christ." Chibs exclaimed.

"There's something that you might be able to get for me." Skeeter told them nervously.

"What's that?"

"Sophie Winston. I've been trying to get with her for months, but hasn't been able to seal the deal yet." When Skeeter said that, Jax almost lost it and went for him. Chibs had to hold him back.

"There's no chance in hell I would let you have your way with Sophie. Pick another." Jax growled dangerously.

"I'm sorry, that's the one I want." Skeeter said a little more firmly. Jax looked at him with a dark look, walking a little closer, scaring the shit out of him.

"Pick. Someone. Else." He hissed between his teeth.

"Okay, okay! There is another one. Emily Duncan." Skeeter said in fear. Jax didn't know who that was and looked at Chibs for clues.

"Emily Duncan. She's one of our Friday night whores. She loves a good punch up her knickers." Chibs said with a wicked grin.

"Yeah, no kidding!" Skeeter exclaimed, relaxing a little bit more.

"You wanna hook up with that croweater, that's fine, but never under any circumstances, make advantages towards Sophie, ever again. Do you understand that?" Jax asked him and Skeeter nodded as quick as he could.

"I'm not cremating anyone until the end of the week." Skeeter told them.

"We need two bodies by tonight." Chibs explained to him.

"Well, I'm prepping a closed coffin. Some phone guy took a header off the top of the pole."

"White guy?"

"Yeah…"

"I'll take it. Need a Mexican guy too." Jax told him.

"Buried one this morning. Cheap seats. Should still be fresh." Skeeter said.

"You mean we gotta dig it up?" Half-Sack asked unsure.

"Who said anything about we?" Jax said with a cruel smile, knowing that the kid would hate this job, but when you're a prospect, you'll do whatever it takes.

* * *

When Jax arrived back at the Shop, they had already stolen Darby's suburban, wanting to use that car in the design - murder they would pull off in Lodi. He needed a shower and walked back to his apartment, waiting for Emily Duncan to arrive.

Jax thought about what he had done today, and what he needed to get done. He promised himself that he would sit down and talk to Sophie. He knew his mom was right, if he let her go again, or did something to hurt her, Sophie may leave all together, and he'd fuck it up forever.

A knock on the door brought his mind back. He hoped that, with some kind of miracle, it would be Sophie. But it wasn't.

An unknown woman stood outside his door.

"Hey Jax." The woman smiled at him.

"Hey." He said confused, not expecting anyone yet.

"Uh, Chibs said you were looking for me. I'm Emily." The woman said and Jax just realized that she was early.

"Right! Shit, sorry. Come in." Jax exclaimed, letting the woman into his apartment.

"Sit down." He said to her, taking a seat on the bed.

"Nice room." She said with that fake croweater smile.

"Yeah. So, I need you to do a favor for the club, Emily." Jax told her to get to the point.

"Really? Sure." Emily said without blinking. "I mean, what do you need? What can I do?"

You know Skeeter, right?" Jax asked her.

"Yeah. That guy has been trying to get into my pants since High School." Emily told him.

"I need to let him in." Jax told her with a serious tone.

"Are you serious? Dude, that guy burns dead bodies he creeps the shit out of me." Emily exclaimed.

"I know. But we need Skeeter to do a good deed and the only thing he wants in return, is the hand of the beautiful Emily Duncan." Jax said using all that charming Teller Mojo. The kind that made all the girls swoon at his very touch and smile.

"I'm not some whore." Emily argued halfheartedly.

"Come on, it'll be our little secret. Cross my heart. I need you Emily." Jax did everything he could to get this deal done. Before Jax knew what happened, the croweater started to take her clothes off, knowing what she wanted in return.

"You do me, I do him." She whispered seductively into his ear.

"Fair enough." Jax said, and he couldn't deny that she was hot and doable. Without second thought, he practically pounced on her, wanting to get this over with.

He had to admit, she was a good fuck. But he couldn't help but picturing someone else entirely. The only girl he ever saw, was Sophie.

Jax was too occupied with pounding into her and he didn't even hear the knock on the door. Not until he heard the voice that belonged to the person he never wanted to see him like this.

"Hey, Jax. Can I talk…" The voice of Sophie stopped. Jax suddenly got in a hurry and untangled himself from Emily.

"Oh, shit! Sophie!"

Sophie turned away from him as quickly as she could.

"I am so sorry. For barging in here." Sohpie said, trying not to show she was about to cry.

"Sophie…" Jax said as he jumped into his pants.

"I am such an idiot." She whispered for him to hear. With that, she slammed the door behind her. And Jax knew he screwed up, once again.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

Why must I be such a stupid idiot? Why do I even try? Because of what you promised Tommy, you idiot.

I walked towards Gemma's office, where I left my keys earlier. Gemma sat at her desk, jumping in surprise when I barged through her door. I frantically searched for my keys among her papers.

"Jesus Christ! Sophie, what's going on?" Gemma asked me.

"I need to find my keys, I need to get out of here." I said without stopping.

"They're right here, sweetheart." Gemma said, holding the keys in front of me. I tried to grabbed them but she held them back.

"No, no. Not until you tell me what's wrong." Gemma said.

"Not now, Gemma. I really need to get away." I said impatiently. Gemma looked up to see Jax coming out of the Clubhouse, with a croweater in tow, knowing what's going on. Gemma tossed me the keys.

"Go." She said simply and I hurried out of the office. I practically ran towards my car, getting in before Jax had the chance to catch up with me. I drove out of the yard without looking back.

I know I overreacted, but it hurts so much, knowing that he would sleep around but wanted nothing more than to be with me, even though he can't admit it. I am at a breaking point right now. I am not sure I can keep my promise any longer.

* * *

I stopped at my place, but I kept on sitting in my car for the time being. I felt my tears finally spilling over and I broke down into little sobs.

I hated feeling like this. I wasn't his Old lady. No matter what I said or did, I had no right to be upset or angry at him. I decided I needed a drink, so I jumped out of my car, and started on the short walk to town. There's a nice little bar that serves decent alcohol, and that's exactly what I need right now. I walk in and I can feel everyone's eyes on me. It's not every day, a SAMCRO Princess walks through the doors of a place like this.

The bartender looked at me with a smirk on his face. He was an old friend of my dad.

"Well, well. If it isn't little Sophie Winston." The bartender greeted me.

"Hey, Warner." I said, slumping down on the empty barstool in front of me.

"What can I serve the Princess with today?" Warner asked.

"What's the strongest you've got?" I asked back.

"Whoa! Rough day?"

"Like you wouldn't believe. Hit me please." I pleaded nodded towards the tequila bottle next to him.

Warner let out a sigh and filled a shot for me.

"You want to talk about it?" Warner asked as I downed the shot right away.

"No… I just want to erase what I saw." I mumbled. "Hit me again."

Warner did what I asked and I sat there, nursing my drinks. By my fifth shot, Warner told me to slow down and gave me a weaker drink instead. Not that I cared anyway.

After some time. my phone started to vibrate, seeing that it was Gemma calling me. I loved that woman, but I needed some time by myself. It wasn't until Jax started calling, that I shut my phone off completely. I couldn't talk to him right now.

"Wow, someone must have seriously pissed you off." Warner said with a laugh.

"No, I'm mostly pissed at myself." I said with a sigh.

"And why is that?"

"Because I can't seem to ever letting myself be happy." I said, planting my forehead against the bar.

"I'm sure it's not that bad, Sophie." Warner said as the bar started to fill up.

If it's one thing I hate about going to other bars in this town, it's the fact that Charming was filled with fucking idiots. They think they're God's gift to women, but they're not. They are immature bastards.

A group of guys came in, greeting Warner as they did. They looked to be a few years younger than me, and the way they behaved with each other, made me wanna gag.

"Hey, Warner! A round of Jack and Coke!" One of them yelled.

"Coming right up!" Warner said back and I just sat there swirling my drink, lost in my own thoughts. I kept on seeing how Jax pleasured that woman and I think the worst part is… I wished it was me.

I was in my own head, when one of the guys came up to the bar sitting next to me. I was not having those guys hitting on me, I wasn't going home with them anyway. No matter how drunk I was. I gave him a stern look, quietly saying that he should get the hell away from me, but he didn't understand that.

"Can I buy you a drink?" The guy asked me and I couldn't stop myself from rolling my eyes.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Warner said, knowing what kind of temper I could have. I did learn a thing or two from Gemma.

"What do you mean?" that stupid guy asked. And now, I couldn't help myself any longer.

"Okay, guy in need of a clue. Here's one. Women send signals. That was a brush off. Before you dip into your shallow pool of wit let me paint us a picture and save us both the trouble. Here's your evening. You are going to slink back off to your buddies, laugh this off, get wasted, go home, and make nice with yourself. But don't be thinking of me, because even your fantasy of me, isn't interested in you." I snarled, downing my drink all at once.

They guy looked completely shocked. I guess no one has ever talked to him that way before. I couldn't care less and turned back to Warner.

"Give me another drink." I demanded but Warner just looked at me.

"I know how much you can take, and you're a lightweight. Let me call you a cab to take you home." Warner said.

"I don't need a cab home. If you don't want me here, I'll find another place to drink instead." I snapped at him.

"Let me call you a cab." Warner repeated and turned to make a phone call. Warner sure is sweet, but dumb. He left the bottle of booze on the bar, and I just simply grabbed it and walked out of the bar without him knowing.

"Stupid jackass." I mumbled by myself, walking down the street. I didn't even realize I've been in there for so long, but it was dark already. Maybe I've been gone longer thought. I shook my head and poured some of the booze down my throat. Right now, it felt good not trying to remember.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Gemma watched as Sophie drove off upset. Jax nearly made it to her but rushed away before he could stop her.

"Shit!" Jax exclaimed, watching Sophie driving away.

"You know, Jackson. I may love you, but you're such a dick sometimes." Gemma told her son, knowing that the only reason Sophie was this upset, it's because she walked in on Jax doing some whore.

Jax tried to call her, but he knew she wouldn't answer. If there had been someone else walking in on him, he wouldn't have reacted like this.

"Jax! Come on, we gotta go!" Clay yelled at him. Jax knew he couldn't disobey him and looked at his mother.

"Please make sure she's all right." Jax pleaded his mother.

"Of course, someone's gotta do it." Gemma snapped back at him.

The rest of the Sons drove out of the yard, doing what needed to be done to get this shit to go away. Jax needed his head in the game, but it wasn't easy.

* * *

Jax took Chibs and Juice back to the cemetery, to see how Half-Sack was doing. He had finally dug to coffin up and they decided to mess with him.

"Aye, beware of the zombie bikers!" Chibs said, trying to freak him out.

"Jesus Christ! You scared the piss out of me!" Half-Sack exclaimed and the others couldn't help but laugh at him.

"Who's your friend?" Juice asked looking down at the man that had just been dug up.

"Hate this shit." Half-Sack said disgusted. "It's really bad karma, you know, digging up a grave, man."

"As long as it's not your grave, karma's just fine." Jax told him.

"So, how are we gonna get him out?" Juice asked, looking down at his size.

"I think we need a tow truck." Chibs said, and borrowed one from Skeeter. It was a nasty job, but it needed to be done.

They used Darby's suburban to move the dead bodies, and this made Jax occupy his mind. He couldn't help but trying to call Sophie again.

"Whatcha doing there Jackie boy?" Chibs asked, as he opened himself a beer.

"I'm trying to call Soph… She walked in om me doing that croweater, Emily. It was fucking brutal, mate." Jax said, as he once again, only got her voicemail.

"You stupid fucker!" Chibs exclaimed. "When are you going to learn?"

Jax tried to ignore him and grabbed a smoke.

"Jesus Christ! These guys stink!" Jax said, rolling down the windows of the car.

"We'll leave Darby some good old dead Mexican stench." Chibs said with a smirk on his face. Out of nowhere, two cars came up on their side, cutting them off, making Jax almost drive off the road.

"Shit!"

"Get that asshole! You know, he made me spill my beer!" Chibs yelled angrily.

Jax didn't want to make notice off themselves and kept to the original plan.

But when they passed a cop car, he knew they were screwed.

"Shit! He spotted the smashed front end." Jax said, trying not to panic as he pulled over. Chibs pulled out his gun to be prepared.

"Lodi's got a sky team. We'll never get away, not in this piece of shit." Chibs stated, starting to get worried.

"Put the gun away." Jax told him as the cop came up to them.

"What's up?" He asked as the car with Juice and Half-Sack moved in high speed, rear-ending the cop car, gaining his attention.

"Jesus Christ! Hey!" The cop yelled. "Hey! Get back here!"

Juice and Half-sack ran away from him.

"Come on, piggy, come on!" Juice taunted him. While they drove the cop away, Chibs and Jax incapacitated his car.

They moved the car around to pick the two of them up. They needed to find another way into Lodi.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I walked towards my house, but I never thought it would be this long to walk. Had I taken a wrong turn somewhere? A car drove up to me, but I didn't pay attention to it.

"Sophie, sweetheart. Is that you?" A familiar voice said. I turned around a saw Unser. Our corrupted chief.

"Unser? What are you doing here?" I slurred.

"What I am doing here? Sophie what are you doing here? Are you drunk?" Unser asked me.

"I'm on my way home, and I'm not drank!" I said. What? It all made sense to me.

"You're nowhere near your home. Let me drive you." Unser said, leading me back to his car. I wanted to protest, but I was too tired to do it.

As soon as I sat down in his car, I rested my head against the cold window. It felt so nice, and cool. And I felt nauseous.

I kept going in and out of sleep. I didn't even pay attention to where we were going. But it didn't take long before I heard some voices.

"Unser? What are you doing here? Is she okay?" I heard a voice ask.

"Sorry to come her this late, Gemma. I got a call from Warner's place. Sophie stole a bottle of booze, after sitter there for hours drinking. I didn't want to bring her home in this state, so I brought her here.

"You did a good thing, Unser. I'll take care of her." Gemma said and both of them had to help me out of the car and into the Clubhouse. Gemma brought me into the bathroom, turning on the shower, before helping me undress. I was a little more awake now, and looked at my hair.

"When did I vomit?" I asked, picking chunks out of my hair.

"I don't know, sweetheart, but please don't do that." Gemma said, before guiding me towards the shower, which was combined with a bathtub. She gently placed me sitting on the floor of the bathtub, helping me washing my hair.

"What's gotten into you, sweetheart? You hardly ever drink." Gemma said mostly to herself.

"I was going to tell him today, I said with a shiver as the water ran down my back.

"Tell him, who, what?" Gemma asked.

"Jax. I was going to tell him that I loved him, that I wanted to give us a chance. But I walked in on him screwing his brains out with some whore." I slurred, feeling overly emotional. "Why would he do this to me, Gemma?"

"I don't know, sweetheart. I don't know." Gemma told me and stroked my hair. After cleaning me up, Gemma helped me to bed.

"I don't want to sleep in that bed." I tried to protest.

"Don't worry, sweetheart. This is Opie's old room." Gemma told me and moved the covers back.

"Oh, okay." I said jumping into bed. Gemma made sure the covers was tightly around me and placing a bucket beside my bed.

"I'll go get you some water, okay?" Gemma said.

"Okay." I said with a yawn, snuggling closer to my pillow. Gemma kissed my forehead and stood up.

"Gemma? I'm sorry about tonight." I said without opening my eyes.

"That's okay, baby. We all have those days." Gemma said before leaving the room. I tried to stay awake, but my body wouldn't listen. I heard voices outside the door, but those sounds quickly disappeared when I finally gave in and fell asleep as soon as the room stopped spinning.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

As soon as the boys returned to the yard, Gemma came walking out, and she was determent.

"Hey ma." Jax said tiredly. It had been a long weird night. He just wanted to go to sleep and forget about this day. "Have you heard from Sophie at all?"

Opie was alerted when he heard his sister's name.

"Unser got a call from Warner earlier tonight. Sophie came in there, got wasted like shit, and walked out of there with a whole bottle of booze." Gemma said, making the two boys seem surprised.

"But Sophie never gets drunk." The two boys said at the same time.

"I know that shitheads! But she did tonight, she's so sad and she feel so heartbroken. She's actually apologizing to me because she was a mess." Gemma said. "Unser found her at the outskirts of town. She was trying to get home but was too drunk to know where she was going."

"What? Where is she now?" Opie asked as Jax's features paled.

"I managed to shower her, and put her to bed. She's asleep in Opie's old room. If she hasn't woken up again to throw up." Gemma answered and both Opie and Jax felt bad.

"You go home to your wife, Opie. I'll stay with your sister tonight." Jax said, wanting to make sure Sophie was okay.

"Call me if you need anything." Opie said, giving Jax a hug. Gemma followed Jax inside the Clubhouse where the Sons celebrated a job well done by having a party.

"Why didn't you put her in my room?" Jax asked without thinking.

"Do you really think that Sophie wanted to stay in the same bed you fucked that whore?" Gemma hissed at him.

"No, you're probably right." Jax said in defeat. He was feeling guilty. "I did it for the club, you know. Made a compromise, I just didn't think that I would hurt her in the process."

"Fix it, Jax." Gemma whispered to him. "Now, I'm going home and I'll see you in the morning, okay?"

"Yeah, sure, ma." Jax said, kissing her cheek. Jax stood outside the door where he knew Sophie was asleep. He was about to go in but changed his mind. He wanted to talk to her, but it wouldn't help if she was asleep. It would be better if he talked to her tomorrow.

"Fuck it." Jax swore to himself and opened the door quietly. The sight that hit him, was the sleeping form of the woman he held closest in this world. She was completely out cold. When he finally laid his eyes on her face, he felt so guilty. Jackson Teller never felt guilty, hurting girls. But harming Sophie Winston, was unheard of. Jax sat down gently next to her on the bed. She was so beautiful, he would be lucky to have her.

Jax let out a breath and carefully caressed her face.

"I'm sorry for all of this. You weren't supposed to see that. I don't want to keep screw things up between us. You're my best friend, and I love you more than anyone. I want to be the guy you deserve, you just have to let me work on becoming that person." Jax whispered, finding it easier to talk to Sophie with her being asleep.

Jax leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"I love you."

Jax quietly walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. He leaned against the door, letting out a breath.

"Fuck me, I need a drink!" Jax exclaimed, joining the party that was going on out by the bar.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

You know that feeling you have after being hit by a truck? That feeling of being repeatedly run over? Yup, that pain is brewing in my head as we speak.

I opened my eyes slowly, feeling my eyes burn from the sunshine seeping through the curtains.

"Ow! My head!" I groaned, hiding under the covers. I heard someone coming into the room but I didn't bother with checking.

"Good morning, sunshine!" Someone said loudly and grabbed my cover, throwing it off me. I looked up and saw Gemma standing there with a couple of coffees to go, an extra pair of clothes, sunglasses, and a sadistic smile on her face.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked, wanting to kick her out of the room.

"I am here to get you out for the day. Being hungover is no excuse to lay in bed all day." Gemma said, placing my fresh clothes on the bed in front of me.

"I'm not just hungover, Gemma, I am also pissed and embarrassed. I am planning on dying in this room, that way, I don't have to face anyone." I said a little too dramatic for my own taste.

"Oh, get your head out of your ass and grow up!" Gemma told me angrily. "You don't get to do this to yourself. Do you think you're the only one making a fool out of yourself?"

"Well, no. but…" I started to say, but Gemma stopped me.

"No buts, now, go take a shower, get dressed, and come out with me for the day. I am shopping for the dinner tonight, and you need a day away from the Clubhouse." Gemma told me and I knew she was right.

"Fine. Give me a few minutes." I told her and jumped out of bed. I knew that I made a complete fool of myself last night, but Gemma's right, everyone does that from time to time. It would be good for me to get out of the Clubhouse, do something with Gemma. Not that I wanted to go to this dinner tonight, but I figured Gemma would kill me if I didn't go.

When I finished my shower, and taking some painkillers, I hoped there wasn't anyone there to talk to me, but with my luck, I had been asleep for so long, the Sons were already out for the day, fixing the last part of Tig's fuck up.

I was glad I didn't see Jax yet. I didn't know what to say to him. I think I overreacted completely and I felt so embarrassed about that. I think I need to apologize to him for some reason.

"So, how's your head?" Gemma asked as we drove out of the yard.

"It's getting there. Coffee helps a lot. You know, this strongly reminded me why I don't drink that often." I answered, rubbing my forehead.

"Yeah, but we all slip up sometimes." Gemma said and we continued the ride to the market in silence.

"Have you thought about talking to Jax at all about this?" Gemma asked, and I knew that question would come eventually.

"I have been thinking about it, I just don't know if it's the best thing for me." I said, not wanting to confront him.

"What? Why?" Gemma asked me.

"Well, it's obvious that he doesn't care who he sleeps with. How can I be sure he will change if we got together?" I asked back.

"You know what kind of guy he is. You make him better, and I think that scares him. And I think that's why I screws up like he does." Gemma told me and that got me thinking. Was I expecting too much from him?

Was the problem me? I didn't want him to change who he is, because of me.

I had a lot to think about and decided not to dwell too much about that right now. Gemma stopped the car outside of the local store and we had a huge grocery list, not that it's any surprise, with the way our family ate like they did.

"So, do you mind making your famous potato salad for tonight?" Gemma asked me.

"Yeah, I think I can to that. I don't think I would live to see the day, if Bobby didn't get a taste of that." I answered with a chuckle.

We filled up two carts of food, praying that it would be enough for the family. I stood in line with Gemma, when a clerk went by me, approaching someone further down the line. That's when I noticed her… Donna.

"I'm sorry Ms. Winston. We can't take your checks anymore. The last two bounced." The clerk said, and it made my stomach turn.

"That's okay, I'll just pay cash." Donna said in defeat. I hated seeing her like this. It broke my heart even more, seeing her taking some of her groceries out, because she couldn't pay for it. I wanted to go after her and I looked at Gemma.

"Go, I have this." Gemma said, knowing that I needed to talk to my best friend. I walked out of the store, trying to catch up with her.

"Donna!" I called and she turned around looking at me.

"Sophie…" She said a little embarrassed.

"What's going on?" I asked, feeling sorry for her.

"It's nothing." She tried to act like it wasn't a big deal.

"Donna, don't lie to me." I demanded.

"It's just… Opie and I are struggling right now. With money." Donna told me.

"Donna… I've told you before. I'll help you with money." I said, touching her arm.

"No! You've already done so much." Donna said quickly.

"But what about the money I gave you the other day?" I asked.

"We did like you said… we put the money into the kind's fund. It didn't feel right to steal from them." Donna told me honestly. "And with the money you gave Opie this morning… the kids' birthday is coming up and we need something for them on their day."

I went through my purse, finding some cash, giving it to her.

"Sophie, no. You've done too much for us." Donna protested.

"Take it, or I shove it down your throat. Now, go in and buy the rest of those groceries." I demanded. Donna took them reluctantly.

"That won't be necessary." Gemma said from behind us, bringing the last of the things Donna wanted to buy.

"What's this?" Donna asked.

"The rest of your groceries." Gemma answered.

"Opie's out now. We don't need any more charity, thanks." Donna said and it broke my heart.

"It was never charity, Donna. It's what we do. You're family." Gemma said with a smile.

"I have my family. I don't need yours." Donna hissed at her.

"Donna, don't be like that." I pleaded, but Gemma stopped me.

"Look. I know what you went through. Been there, with two husbands." Gemma said and it was true. I remember a time when John was in jail. "Lose your man. Kids lose their dad. You get pissed off. Want to blame the club. But SAMCRO is not the enemy. It's the glue. The one thing that will always be there… to pull you through the ugly shit. Gotta stop fighting us, Donna. You need all of us, not just Sophie."

Gemma was right. No matter how much shit the club did, they all stood up for each other. We are a family. And maybe by being a part of that family, may make thing easier for my brother and his family.

"I married Opie. I didn't marry the club. You have no idea what I need." Donna said, taking the bag, and tried to get away.

"Hey, Donna?" I said, stopping her. "We are having a little family dinner tonight. Why don't you and Opie bring the kids and come join us."

Donna didn't answer, but stood there watching me.

"You don't have to give me an answer now, but it's at Mama Gem and Clay's home. It will be fun if you all came." I said with a smile on my face.

"Come on. I need help with the groceries." Gemma told me and I nodded. Donna promised me she would think about it but she was stubborn enough not to come.

"So, are we going over to the clubhouse, or back to your place?" I asked as we packed our things away in the car.

"We are meeting Luann back at my place in an hour. So I'm dropping you off there now, we need to start dinner." Gemma answered me. "I take it you don't want to go back to the club house with me and talk to Jax, do you?"

"No, not particularly." I said honestly. "It'll be fun to be with the girls for a change."

Gemma and I jumped back into the car, and drove to her house. I hadn't been there in a while and it was nice to be there. We unloaded out bags and Gemma left me by myself. I figured I could just start setting the table and do those things ready. I was not just sitting around doing nothing.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax was sitting on his spot up on the roof, where his father used to take him and Sophie when they were kids. He hadn't seen her all day, so he figured she was with his mother. Jax took out the journal Sophie had kept at the wishes from John, and he decided it was time to start reading it.

 _"Most of us were not violet by nature. We all had our problems with authority, but none of us were sociopaths. We came to realize that when you move your life off the social grid, you give up the safety that society provides. On the fringe, blood and bullets are the rule of law, and if you're a man with convictions, violence is inevitable."_

Jax climbed down from the roof after some time, waiting for the phone call that Bobby and Tig were back with the two Mexican bodies. His mother waited for him in his room.

"Hey, darling. Sophie and I went shopping tonight, we picked up some toiletries for you." Gemma said, giving him a bag.

"Thanks, mom." Jax said, falling on his bed.

"You okay, baby? You look exhausted." Gemma said worriedly.

"Long night. Worrying about getting everything done on time. Worrying about Sophie. How is she today anyway?" Jax asked.

"Well… She's hungover, embarrassed, angry at herself. You know the drill." Gemma answered. "Is that you dad's stuff Sophie put in storage?"

"Yeah. Some pictures, a few Harley manuals. Bunch of Nam shit." Jax said.

"You said you read something." Gemma asked hopefully.

"A few journal entries, nothing much." Jax answered, not really sure why he felt the need to lie to his mother. He wanted to talk to Sophie about it first.

"Oh. I'd love to read it. Your father… he was a real good writer. Always had a knack for it. You know, I'm the one who bought him the old Selectric." Gemma told her son.

"Didn't know that." Jax said with a smile.

"Jax! Clay need you!" He heard someone yell at him. Jax jumped up and grabbed his folder with him.

"Custom job." Jax muttered and walked out of his room.

* * *

Clay and Jax walked outside together as Hale stopped his car in front of the shop.

"Unser's not retiring. What did you do? Threaten to rape his daughter?" Hale asked Clay.

"That's a little harsh." Clay said with a smug smile. "Maybe the old man's not ready for the gold watch."

"Just got back from that bluebird warehouse. There were two dead women in the utility hatch... before my guys got pulled off. They're gone." Hale said looking at them suspiciously.

"They could've been napping." Jax suggested.

"You guys. Cruising around here like heroes. But you and I know the truth." Hale told them.

"What truth is that?"

"You're white trash thugs holding on to a dying dream." Hale practically hissed at them.

"Oh, that is so poetic, Chief. Oh! I'm sorry, I guess it's still Deputy Chief." Clay mocked him.

"It doesn't matter if I'm chief or not. You can't stop progress. It won't be long until SAMCRO is just an ugly memory in the history of Charming. So you enjoy your ride while you still can." Hale said dangerously before returning to his police car.

Clay and Jax kept on walking, talking lowly to him.

"You go get rid of those bodies." Clay told him.

"Yeah. All right." Jax said and drove off to meet the other guys at the cemetery.

Watching the bodies burn, made the whole circle come at a close. The problem they had with Tig, was out of the way, but they needed to be more careful after this. It was too close call.

"Should we say a prayer or something?" Half-Sack asked sincerely.

"You know any Bible passages about lost semen?" Juice asked with a laugh, gaining only to be hit in the back by Jax.

"Uh, may the ray… ray of sunshine warm your souls. Amen." Tig said, showing respect for the two dead Mexican. "Let's roll."

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

There was murmuring of voices all around me. I liked it this way, making dinner for everyone, with the help of the other women. Luann told us some crazy stories from her day at work as a porn film director, telling us about the bloopers from the scenes. Or gag reel if you like. I laughed so hard at it, and it felt good to do so.

The sound of motorcycles, brought me back to the reality I had to face. I hadn't seen Jax since I walked out on him yesterday and I didn't know if it would end up in an argument, or a hug.

The other old ladies, greeted their men, except for Luann and me. Otto was in jail, and let's face it… I'm no one's old lady.

"Sophie! I really hope you've made you famous potato salad, or I'm leaving!" The voice of Bobby boomed through the room.

"Of course, Bobby. No family dinner without it." I called back.

"You're my kind of woman." Bobby called.

"Hey! That's my daughter, you jackass!" Piney said, not liking the way he talked about me. What a strange man I have as a father.

* * *

I was stirring something, when I felt someone's eyes on me. I looked up and saw Jax standing there leaning against the counter. The moment I locked eyes with him, my breathing almost stopped and it felt as if I was sweating. Jax motioned for me to follow him but I didn't know if I wanted to. Gemma could see my reaction and came over to me.

"I can take over. Go, you need to talk to him." Gemma told me. I nodded and walked towards Jax. I walked past him without stopping, so he was forced to follow me.

I opened the front door and walked outside. Jax took out a cigarette and offered me one. I only shook my head.

"You wanted to talk, let's talk." I said, not beating the bush. I just wanted this over with.

"I owe you an apology." Jax said, finally looking at me.

"You don't. I was just at the wrong place at the wrong time." I told him. Jax nodded, wanting to agree with me. After that, he just stood there, smoking his cigarette and I didn't have time for this.

"Well… if that was the only thing you needed to say, I have things to do." I said, having enough of this shit. I walked passed him again and this time, he stopped me.

"Shit, Sophie. I'm sorry for hurting you over and over again. You don't deserve it." Jax told me harshly.

"Then, why do you, Jax?" I asked, finally admitting that he was hurting me. "You know I'm the only person who won't leave. Why do you give me an excuse to do exactly that?"

"Because I'm scared. I fear not being good enough for you. To not be the person you deserve to be with." Jax told me and it shocked me, that he thought that I needed him to change himself into someone else.

"When have I ever said that I wanted you to change?" I asked narrowing my eyes at him. "I've never wanted that for you. To me, you're still the same Jax I grew up with, the same guy that gave me my first kiss, who took my virginity. I would never ask for you to change. If that's what you think, then maybe you have changed. Because the Jax that I know, would not be afraid of not being good enough."

I turned around to walk away from him again. But Jax stopped me and pushed me up against the wall. Within seconds, his lips descended on mine, making me see just as much fireworks as I did when I was 11. I quickly wrapped my arms around his neck, holding on for dear life. My knees grew weak, and my heart almost jumped out of my chest. This felt right, this is how it's supposed to be.

Jax broke the kiss first, holding me close to him, resting his forehead against mine.

"I want to do this, Sophie, but I want to do this right." Jax whispered, not daring to talk any louder. "Do you want that?"

I nodded my head as I tried to catch my breath.

"What do you mean by doing it right?" I asked, finally looking into his eyes. Seeing that spark I haven't seen in a long time.

"Oh, you'll know." Jax answered with a smirk. "Now, let us go inside, because I'm starving."

I agreed and walked in with him. Jax let go of my hand and kissed his mother's cheek before sitting down at the table with the others. Gemma and I stood there, watching the mad pack of people we call family.

Gemma could understand from the look on my face that something did happen between Jax and I, and she looked so happy for us. Whatever we are. I wouldn't say that Jax and I are together, but it's a step in the right direction and he insisted on doing this right.

I sat down on the spot in between Jax and Chibs, laughing and talking with the others, having a really good time. I loved this family. The only thing missing, was Opie and the rest of our family. I looked up at Jax who grinned at me. He placed a kiss on my cheek, and it made me blush.

"Jax? Jax?" Bobby called, breaking our trance, making me blush even more. "Are you going to be hogging Sophie's potato salad all night or are you sharing?"

Jax smiled and passed it along.

We are a family, maybe something unlike any other, but that's what we are... We are a family, who will back each other up, no matter what.

* * *

 **So, did you like it?**

 **About that brush off scene in the bar with Sophie... I borrowed that from the show "One Tree Hill" and I do not take credit for writing that. I just love that line!**

 **Finally, the first kiss since they were 14 and 15 years old. But they aren't together yet. They want to take it slow, and Jax is so cute, wanting to make things right between them. But! This doesn't mean that it will be an easy ride for them...**

 **Until next time xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***bethie86: I don't think she'll ever back down to Tara. That girl stepped on her toes too many times growing up... She's much thougher now.**

 ***cbrienza: Thank you! I think it's good for Sophie to get her frustration out. She didn't fight for him 15 years ago, now, it's a different game.**

 ***guest: Thank you! Jax hasn't told her he loves her to her face yet, but he's getting there.**

 ***naviskyy: Thank you! I try my best!**

 ***SOAROCKS: I'll try my best, as of now, it's rather easy ;)**

 ***Guest(2): Thank you! Still going long and strong!**

 ***Emmettluver2010: I am not excluding that thought. But with Hale, I don't see it happening. But the story is still young ;)**

 ***Guest(3): Thank you! They aren't together yet, but it's a start.**

 ***Guest(4): Thank you so much for your kind words! It means a lot!**

 ***india-guest: I'm not sure if that "Wow" was good or bad, but I decided to think it was good and say thank you!**


	6. Fun Town

**I'm back with a new chapter!**

 **Sorry about the wait, but it's here now!**

 **Please enjoy, and tell me what you think :)**

 ***Not edited***

 _ **I do not own "The Sons of Anarchy" only my OC.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 **Fun Town**

I was smiling.

I've been doing that a lot lately. I looked around at the smiling children, running around going on rides, having the time of their lives. And by children, I mean the Sons. Fun Town was back. It was a yearly carnival in town, and about 40 % of the income went to charity and in return, my company had to help with everything. Making sure we had enough volunteers, have good enough security, and made sure that the kids had a good time.

But it meant that I had to work and not go on rides. But I loved it. I watched as Jax, Tig and Bobby, rode around on a little train, and they looked ridiculous.

Things between Jax and I… I don't know how to describe them. We're in a good place, not labeling anything. He told me those two weeks ago, that he wanted to do this right and by that, he meant taking things slow, agonizingly slow. That means... still no sex.

It frustrates me at some levels, but still, it makes me feel special. He has been really good to me lately, showing up at my work with lunch, taking me to see Abel at the hospital, and it's pissing Tara off. Another plus for me.

One of the workers gave me a form to sign as I saw Gemma and the others coming towards me. Gemma looked all giddy and almost like a teenager again, almost like I remember she was with John, before things turned to shit. And seeing her with Clay, somehow, it didn't seem right.

"Let's go in the photo booth." Gemma suggested seductively in Clay's ear. "Come on. Let me give you a quick hand job." I gave the form away and turned towards them.

"Absolutely not! There are kids here. Please don't scar them for life." I said, placing my hands on my hips.

"Don't worry, sweetheart, I already got a picture of that." Clay said and I wanted to gag.

"Yeah, but the only difference is that this time, it will be my hand." Gemma said, winking at me. Clay grabbed a hold of his wife and carried her over her shoulder. I rolled my eyes at them but quickly forgot when I felt Jax's arm around my shoulder, keeping me close to him.

"They'll never learn, sweetheart." Jax whispered in my ear.

"You got that right." I murmured, wrapping my arms around his waist. Jax did something as simple as kissing my temple, having me swooning at his feet. How was it even possible to be such a girl? I wasn't supposed to be like this… ever.

I looked up and saw someone coming our way. It was Elliot Oswald and his family, enjoying the day at the carnival. Oswald was a business man I work with from time to time, letting me have a children's day at his ranch every year. We take the kids that well enough and give them a day with the horses. It's a good way for them to get better.

"Hey Clay." Elliot said politely.

"How you doin', Elliot?" Clay asked, shaking his hand.

"Okay, Clay."

"Karen." Clay gave her his biggest smile. Their daughter Tristen, is just a thirteen-year-old girl. God! I remember how it was to be that innocent. Thirteen was my last year being a kid. Because when I was fourteen, I lost my virginity to Jax.

"Hey, mom. I'm gonna go to the Spinout." Tristen told her mother.

"Tristen, you've been on it four times already." Her mother said, not being that patient with her daughter.

"I know." Tristen said and I felt bad for her.

"Here." Jax said, taking some tickets out.

"That's not necessary." Karen protested.

"That's all right. They kicked me off, because I was screaming too loud." Jax said, smiling at the young girl. It made my heart melt.

"What do you say?" Elliot asked his daughter.

"Thanks." Tristen said, giving us a shy smile before walking towards one of the rides.

* * *

Jax ushered me away from his parents along with Tig, wanting to go on other rides. I wasn't much of a rides-person but I followed them anyway.

Jax stopped me when we reached the Farris wheel.

"Come on. Let's take a ride." Jax told me, holding my hand.

"Jax. I'm supposed to be working, and besides, that thing freaks me out." I said, looking up at the scary thing.

"Come on, Sophie! I will take care of you." Jax said with a pout and those adorable puppy eyes.

"Okay, fine! But if I die, I will come back and kill you!" I said nervously. Yes, I'm a little scared of heights.

We sat down in one of the carts, and I felt sick, grabbing onto the bar in front of me until my knuckles turned white.

"Soph, relax! We're not even moving yet." Jax told me but I just shook my head.

"Every year! Every year since I was 6, you've been dragging me onto this fucking thing." I hissed. "And every year, I'm afraid that it will stop like it did back then. We were stuck up there for hours!"

I panted, looking at Jax with panic in my eyes and the bastard laughed. He laughed!

"It's not funny, you jackass!" I yelled, squealing in terror as the wheel started up. Did it always go this fast?

"Would you relax? It's nothing to be afraid of!" Jax said, wrapping his arm around me, keeping me close.

"It's easy for you to say. I can't believe that you made me do this again." I said, closing my eyes as we moved closer to the top. Not wanting to see it if we in fact did stop.

"Sophie, you need to calm down." Jax whispered in my ear, I couldn't help but shiver, but it didn't help my fear at all.

"That's not going to work. There's nothing you could do or say to make me feel better…" I ranted but something stopped me. Ever so lightly, Jax pressed his lips to mine and it silenced me.

My eyes flew open for a second, looking straight into the eyes I know and love.

"Maybe I was wrong…" I said, mostly to myself, and connected my lips with his again, grabbing onto his neck, pulling him to me, kissing him with all my power. His lips tasted like tobacco, a hint of booze and for some reason, sugar. Jax smiled against my lips, caressing my cheek, before tangling it in my hair. He grinned at me for a second, before connecting our lips again. Jax didn't have to ask twice when he wanted to deepen the kiss even more. The moment his lips touched mine, I was lost when I felt his hand move up my thigh, hitching it over his hip, making me gasp.

I know, how can you manage to do so in a small cart? You want the simple and most obvious answer? He's Jax Teller. He can do anything. Completely lost in the moment, I didn't know if we were moving or not.

"Hey!" Someone yelled loudly, and I removed myself away from Jax, looking straight at the man working at the Ferris wheel. "This is a place for children, not adults acting like horny teenagers. Now, get off my ride before I report your company for inappropriate behavior, Ms. Winston!"

"Sorry. Won't happen again." I said, blushing like a mad man. I grabbed Jax's hand and jumped out of the cart.

"Wow. Feels like I'm sixteen again." Jax said with a laugh.

"It's not funny, Jax! This is my work." I said, knowing that if would go for deaf ears. Jax cupped my face and kissed me again.

"Seriously? You're acting like teenagers, and can I please get some?" Tig said, shoving Jax away, trying to get to me as Bobby tried not to laugh.

"Fuck off, Tig." Jax said, playfully nudging him away from me.

* * *

We walked around together, when we came across this obnoxious clown. I really hate clowns. Can't stand them. He was a real jackass to people. Bullying the kids.

"Your daddy throws like your mommy. He wears a bra and panties to your games?" The clown asked tauntingly, and I wanted to rip him off his high chair and into the water tank. "Come on. Try again, hotshot!"

I felt my anger rising and I walked towards the booth, just as some unfamiliar bikers or something walked past us. I've never seen them before, but they looked like they meant bad news.

"Darby's guys?" Bobby asked Jax.

"I don't recognize them." Jax said, keeping his arm around me tightly.

"Oooh, look at the big, bad, bikers, huh?" That nasty clown said. "Gonna get clowny all wet, before I get your girlfriend all wet, huh?"

I actually gagged into my mouth because of his statement. I knew it would piss Jax off beyond reason, and made him more determent to hit the target.

"Come on, Jax. Defend your woman's honor." Tig said, and I knew he wanted to hurt the guy. Tig was such a good friend. Jax missed his first shot, making the clown laugh.

"What's the matter, though guy? Can't put the little ball in the tight hole? How do you ever manage to please your girlfriend? Do you want a real man, sweetheart, someone that can make you scream?" The clown said, looking directly at me, blowing a kiss my way. Tig exploded right then.

"Oh, no. that's a Bozo no-no." Tig said, going for the target. The clown didn't sound all that clever anymore and started to freak out.

Tig and the others dunked the bastard in the water, holding him under for a small amount of time, scaring him a little.

I couldn't help but laugh and felt lucky to have someone that cared so much about me to defend my honor. I think I fell in love with Jax a little more in that moment.

* * *

Someone tapped on my shoulder and I turned around, only to find Tristen.

"Hey, kid." I said with a smile.

"Hey, Sophie. Do you mind taking the ride with me?" Tristen asked me. "I feel a little bad that I got yours and Jackson's tickets."

I loved the mind of this girl. She is still so young, and so considerate of others.

"I would love to go on a ride with you, Tristan. Just let me talk to Jax first, okay?" I responded, looking back at my boyfriend, or whatever he was. Jax saw us standing there and walked over to us.

"Hey there, Tristen, having fun?" Jax asked her and Tristen got all shy and blushed like crazy. Oh, how I missed that age. So, innocent.

"Hey, Jax!" We all turned our heads to see Juice running towards us. "The Irish are coming. Clay needs us."

Jax let out a sigh, knowing he really didn't want to leave.

"Sorry, darling. I have to go." Jax said in defeat.

"That's okay. Tristen here, has asked if I want to go on a ride with her." I told Jax, gesturing to the girl next to me.

"Well then. Tristen, take care of my girl here. She doesn't want to admit it, but she's terrified of the rides." Jax said, whispering the last part, making Tristen laugh.

"Stop it!" I exclaimed playfully. "Get your ass into gear."

"All right. I'll see you later and I will get your ass into gear." Jax said, winking at me. My heart almost jumped out of my chest when he said that. We haven't had sex yet and both him and I was getting frustrated. Before I could answer, Jax kissed me and walked away with Bobby, Tig and Juice. I didn't like it when they left because of business, but it's okay. I know they must do their bidding. I shook my head and turned towards Tristen, and she had the biggest smile on her face.

"Wow! You and your boyfriend are so cute together!" Tristen squealed as the thirteen-year-old she is. I only smiled as we walked towards the Spinout.

"Hey, Sophie? How old were you when you first kissed a boy?" Tristen asked me.

"Uhm… I was 11 and I only got kissed because I was sad." I told her honestly.

"I've never been kissed." Tristen said with a shrug.

"You'll have your first kiss, someday, I promise." I told her, thinking about how lucky she was. "And you'll feel like the happiest girl in the world when you do."

Tristen only smiled at me as we got into the carriage of the Spinout. We rode it together and I tried my best to be brave. It wasn't easy though. I screamed as the wind ran through my hair. I loved riding with her.

* * *

After our ride, I need some sugar. I needed something to bring me back.

"Hey, Tristen." I said, looking at the giddy girl. "I am just going to get some cotton candy and then I'll meet up with you, okay?" I asked her nicely.

Tristen nodded and stood there waiting for me.

I paid for the candy with a smile and turned around to look for Tristen. I couldn't see her and it terrified me. Without warning, I could hear a scream, coming from the woods. Every instinct in my body, told me to run like hell, but then again, someone wanted me to figure this out.

I ran towards the sound blindly, and I tried my best to see something in the dark forest.

"Tristen, are you here?" I yelled, trying to figure out what's happening. I heard a scream and then I saw a young girl running towards me. I recognized her right away, and she looked terrified.

"Tristen, what is going on?" I asked her, terrified.

"He's after me!" She screamed, and I couldn't understand it.

"Who is?" I asked frantically, but before I could do anything, someone hit me over the head, knocking me out completely.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax and the others left Fun Town and it was already dark outside. He had a good time with Sophie and he couldn't wait to see her again. He was whipped, Jax Teller never gets whipped. It simply doesn't happen. Clay had told them to go back to the Auto Shop, where the new delivery would turn up.

They all say around outside, waiting for the truck to arrive.

"You think the prospect's deep enough?" Clay asked gesturing towards half-sack, tidying up in the Shop.

"May only have one nut, but it's a big one. I trust him." Jax said, knowing what he was capable of.

"Hey, prospect!" Clay called, gaining his attention.

"Huh?"

"Come on over here, learn a thing." Clay told him.

"Hurry up, hurry up! Don't get hit." Tig said as the truck drove into the yard. "Don't screw this up, Sack."

Chibs and the Irish came out of the truck. Clay approached him and gave the man a hug.

"Good to see you Michael." Clay said to the man in front of him.

"Boys are bringing the ladies here." Michael told him.

"Russian ladies?"

"62's and AK's. fresh from the Kremlin." Michael answered and jumped up on the truck, where the barrels were.

"Got all the parts, a couple of assembled samples." Michael said, giving a gun to Clay.

"God bless Gorbachev." Clay exclaimed happily before they brought everything back to the clubhouse to assemble the weapons. Clay and Jax sat down with Michael to have a drink.

"Niners torched the warehouse where we store and assemble our weapons." Clay told him.

"Holy shite!" Michael exclaimed. "What does that do to your business?"

"Ah, we just bought nine acres on the edge of Amador County. We start rebuilding, we'll be up and running in two, three months." Clay answered.

"Can't you assemble 'em here?" Michael asked.

"We learned our lesson the hard way. We don't cross our money streams." Clay answered. "This is strictly a legit automotive business."

"So, that means you go three months without buying the weapons from us? SAMCRO's a huge piece of our income." Michael said.

"Gotta make the adjustment, right? I mean, it's part of the business." Clay told him.

"This isn't a business for us, brother. True I.R.A. We're not merchants. We're soldiers. The guns we sell fuel the cause. Without it, we lose ground." Michael argued.

"We support the cause, McKeevy. Shit like this just happens." Chibs said, joining the conversation. "We'll have our guns up and running in no time."

"That's the problem. No time." Michael argued. "Three week would cripple us. Three months, we can't wait for that."

"What the hell are you saying?" Clay asked him.

"I'm saying if you can't front us that cash in the downtime, we're gonna have to find a new buyer." Michael answered.

"I've been buying guns from you for over a decade, Michael. When you spilt from Adams, I stayed with you because of our friendship." Clay told him.

"You stayed with me because the other cowards sold out. We're the only outlaws left. Now, don't take this personal, Clay." Michael practically hissed at him. "Your warehouse burning down is a casualty of commerce. You lose our guns, that's a casualty of war."

Jax just sat there in silence, thinking. Thinking about anything else but this going down in front of him.

* * *

Back at Fun Town, Tristen's parents frantically searched for their daughter. Gemma heard that Karen was calling out for her daughter, and she knew by the way she called out for her, that something was wrong.

"What's going on?" Gemma asked her.

"We can't find Tristen." Karen said quickly.

"Oh, Jesus." Gemma said under her breath. "Well, she must be here somewhere."

"No, we've looked everywhere." Karen said terrified.

"She's not on any of the rides." Elliot said when he reached them.

"Wait. I saw her with Sophie on one of the rides. Maybe she's with her somewhere." Gemma tried to calm the scared parents down a little. "I'll call her right now."

Gemma picked up her phone, dialing Sophie's number.

"Damit. She didn't pick up." Gemma said frustrated.

"Please try again." Karen demanded, feeling her tears starting to fall. Gemma nodded and tried repeatedly.

"Where the hell are you, Sophie?" Gemma asked herself. She had a feeling something was wrong, because Sophie wouldn't have just left the carnival before closing time.

"Hey, I will look around for a bit, see if I can find Sophie." Gemma told the distraught parents, praying that everyone was okay.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I slowly opened my eyes, trying to figure out why I was on the ground. I felt groggy, and tried to move. Pain shot through me when I did, and it felt awful. My head was pounding. Did I fall?

I laid there, trying to remember what happened. The last I remember, is that Tristen asked me to go on a ride with her and that's it. Everything's so blurry, I really can't seem to get my head to clear up.

In the distance, I could swear I heard a sound, something ringing. It's messing with my head even more. I manage to get up in a sitting position, but my head is still swimming. I look down next to me, seeing my phone blinking, going off like crazy. I slowly pick it up, my body protesting as I did, making me groan. Without looking at the caller I.D, I answered it as best as I could.

 _"Hello?"_ I said with a slurred voice.

 ** _"Sophie? Thank God! Where are you?"_**

 _"Gemma? I uh, I don't know. I don't know what happened."_ I said, trying to get my head to clear up.

 ** _"Where are you? Are you with Tristen?"_**

 _"Tristen? No, why would I be with…"_

I stopped myself from talking and it finally hit me. I heard screaming and I found Tristen in here. Someone was following her.

I looked around frantically, trying to see something in this darkness.

 ** _"Sophie! Answer me!"_**

Suddenly, I heard a whimper not so far away. I tried to focus on the sound, finally seeing something a few feet away.

 _"Gemma, I'm in the forest not so far from the carnival. Come quickly, I need your help and call an ambulance!"_

I hung up the phone quickly, scrambling to my feet as best as I could. I ignored every protest my body was making and forced myself into a run towards the barely moving figure.

As I came closer, I could tell it was Tristen and I pushed myself harder. I forgot my own pain when I finally saw her clearly.

"Tristen!" I said, sitting down next to her, placing her head in my lap. She looked awful. Her pants was only hanging on by one leg. She had bruises all over her body, she was bleeding and whimpering. You didn't need to be a doctor to understand what had happened here.

This poor girl has been raped.

"Sophie, it hurts." Tristen whimpered. I tried my best not to cry in front of her.

"I know, sweetheart. I know." I said with a soft tone. I didn't want to move her by myself.

"Sophie! Tristen!" I heard the familiar voice of Gemma and Elliot booming through the woods just about ten minutes later.

"Over here!" I yelled as loudly as I could and that seemed to do the trick. Elliot Oswald and Gemma came running towards us.

"What happened?" Elliot asked, sitting down next to me, looking over his daughter with terror in her eyes. I couldn't answer him, I was still dizzy and in shock. The paramedics and law enforcement followed within seconds, taking care of the young girl.

Gemma gently put her hands on my shoulders.

"Come on sweetheart. Let them do their job." Gemma said softly. I nodded and let her help me up from the forest floor.

Another paramedic gave me a blanket, guiding me to an ambulance not too far away.

"Miss, are you all right?" The paramedic asked, shining a light in my eyes.

"I don't know…" I said, trying to ignore the pain in my head.

"How is Tristen?" I asked, looking up at Gemma.

"They are taking care of her." She assured me. The paramedic touched the back of my head and I winched at the pressure.

"Will Sophie be all right?" Gemma asked him.

"She'll need stiches, but she can go home tonight." The paramedic answered and I could tell Gemma started breathing again.

"How is she?" I heard Chief Unser ask as he walked towards us.

"She seems okay." Gemma answered looking down at me.

"Hey, Sophie. Can I ask you some questions?" Unser asked me and I really didn't want to. I looked up at Gemma, pleading her to understand me.

"Can't this wait until tomorrow? She's already been through enough." Gemma told one of her best friends. I started to feel lightheaded again, and it got worse by the second.

"I'm sorry, Gemma, but I need to get her statement right now. She's the only one beside the rape victim who may have some information." Unser told her.

"I don't feel so good." I told the paramedic standing next to me. For some reason, when I don't feel good, I feel the urge of walking, like if that helps somehow. I got up, but before I could even take a step, my legs gave out and I buckled. My ears were ringing, and my sight were blurry.

The last thing I saw and heard, was Gemma, yelling my name and running towards me, and then everything went black.

* * *

The beeping sound of a machine brought me out of my slumber. At first, I thought it was my alarm going off, telling me it was time to go to work or something. I tried to reach the alarm, but it hurts so bad to move.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Someone said and I opened my eyes quickly. I was in an unfamiliar room, and I looked straight at a tired Gemma.

"What happened?" I asked groggily, trying to move.

"You're in the hospital. Someone hit you over the head at Fun Town. The doctors stitched you up." Gemma told me as I brought a hand up towards my head. I could feel the stiches in the back. When Gemma mentioned Fun Town, I remembered Tristen.

"How is Tristen?" I asked suddenly.

"She's here and they're taking care of her." Gemma told me.

"What time is it?" I had to ask.

"It's the middle of the night, but if you want, I can call Jax, telling him to come here." Gemma answered, but I shook my head.

"No, don't do that. I don't want to wake him up now." I replied, leaning back against my pillow.

"Sophie. I know you know that Tristen was raped. Did you see who did it?" Gemma asked me, caressing my hand.

"No, I didn't. All I remember is hearing someone screaming and I was running towards it. Tristen ran towards me saying that someone was after her, but she didn't have the time to tell me who before everything went black. I should've protected her" I told Gemma, feeling the tears threatening to fall and I was soon full on sobbing. Gemma wrapped her arms around me, holding me tight against her. It didn't help and I was hyperventilating. The heart monitor went all crazy and it felt as if I couldn't breathe.

"Sophie, calm down." Gemma said gently.

"I can't breathe." I said in panic. Gemma had no other choice but to press the emergency button. Within seconds, nurses ran through the door, pushing Gemma out of the room. I heard them talking as I tried to get away from them, but I couldn't fight them as I felt the sedative kicking in. I had to let the drugs take over, and fall into unconsciousness.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Gemma felt helpless when she was kicked out of Sophie's room. She knew that she wasn't raped but she also knew that Sophie would feel bad about someone doing this to an innocent girl and her not being able to help her.

Unser walked up to Gemma who was looking at Sophie through the glass.

"What's going on?" Unser asked.

"She had a panic attack." Gemma answered without looking at him. "I should call Jax."

Unser stopped Gemma before she could take her phone out.

"I don't think it's a good idea. It won't do either of them any good." Unser told her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Call Donna or Opie, or even her father to let them know." Gemma said, not taking her eyes off Sophie. She wanted to call her son, because she knew that he would be devastated. But then again… She wanted to respect Sophie's wishes.

The doctor came out a little later. He walked over to Gemma, who jumped up to greet him.

"Is she okay?" Gemma asked.

"She will be." The doctor answered. "I know that Sophie is someone that wants to help others, and not being able to, is making her panic. I strongly suggest that she should talk to our psychiatrist in the morning. She needs someone to talk to."

"She doesn't need some shrink, she has her family for that." Gemma said to herself after the doctor left. She looked back at Sophie who was sleeping soundly in her bed.

Jax would lose his shit when he figured out that Sophie kept this from him.

* * *

The next morning, Jax walked along with Chibs and Clay towards the shop. He thought it was strange that Sophie didn't come by last night, or not even calling, but he figured she was tired after working at Fun Town and went straight home. He decided to call her a little later.

"McKeevy's gonna want his usual per-month order and a month's insurance." Chibs said, bringing Jax's head back into the game.

"I can't get my hands on 200K. I got every spare cent tied up in the rebuild." Clay told him.

"So, what should I tell him?" Chibs asked.

"How much time do we have?" Jax asked as he removed his sun glasses.

"Well, he's going up north tomorrow. Don't know for how long, but when he gets back, he'll want his cash before he goes to Dungloe." Chibs answered.

"I know you don't like this, but do you think Sophie would be willing to lend us some money?" Clay asked Jax, already knowing the answer.

"Na, man. Sophie would do whatever for the club, but we can't involve her business into the guns. It's all she has and it will crush her if someone found out she was funding us." Jax replied knowing he couldn't ask for that kind of cash. He didn't even think she had that much to spend anyway.

"Fine. Tell the shamrock I'll give him his money. But I want you to go with him. Courtesy escort. Let me know who he's meeting with." Clay told Chibs as they walked over to greet Elliot Oswald who had just pulled into the yard.

Elliot told them about the assault on his daughter and he was completely broken up about it, and if nothing else, he was angry as hell.

"My daughter is still in shock. She doesn't remember much. Asshole busted her jaw and threw her down into the dirt. Raped her. She's 13 years old." Elliot told them.

"What did the cops say?" Jax asked him.

"Took a report. Hale's out looking." Elliot answered.

"I want you to find him. You bring him to me first. Pay anything you want." Elliot told him but it didn't seem right to Clay, earning money off that.

"Who do you think we are, Elliot?" Clay asked him.

"Oswald's has been in this town a lot longer than SAMCRO. I know what you are." Elliot said almost hissing in the process.

"I don't want your money. Nobody comes into my town and does to an innocent girl and hurting someone in my family." Clay said, thinking about the fact that Sophie is family no matter what. "We'll find the sick bastard. But… when I deliver him to you, I'm gonna need to know that justice will be served. You get what I'm saying, old friend?"

"Yeah." Elliot answered with tears in his eyes. Clay reached his hand out for him to take and Elliot grabbed it without hesitation.

"Hey, prospect!" Clay called, gaining the attention of Half-Sack.

"You know…" Elliot said to Jax. "It surprises me to see you here."

"And why is that?" Jax asked skeptically.

"Sophie was with Tristen yesterday. Her attacker clogged Sophie over the head. By the time, she woke up, she found Tristen all…" Elliot couldn't finish that sentence. "Anyway, she's in the hospital, she collapsed after the paramedics arrived. Gemma has been with her all night, even her father came in during the night."

Clay had heard every word Elliot said, and he had to stop Jax from running out the door.

"Hey! Don't run off like that." Clay told him.

"Sophie is in the hospital. I need to go and see if she's okay." Jax spat back at him.

"I know you do, but your mom is already there and so is Piney. If something happens, she will call. Right now, we have Church and we need to vote on what to do next. You do want to catch this fucker?" Clay asked.

"Of course, I do!" Jax said with gritted teeth.

"Then we deal with club business first." Clay told him and Jax didn't like it at all, but joined Clay and the others in Church.

* * *

Clay told them about what Elliot had told them and it set the guys off and they weren't happy about it.

"We have a 200K deficit hanging over our heads. Do we really wanna be out there playing some pro bono Lone Ranger?" Tig asked, not sounding so convinced.

"Guy raped a 13-year-old." Jax said, almost losing his shit.

"I get it. I just don't like putting my ass on the line for some outsider." Tig argued. "Clay, Oswald dosen't give a shit about SAMCRO."

"But Sophie does." Jax fired back.

"What are you talking about, brother?" Tig asked, not understanding anything.

"Sophie was there. She tried to help the girl, but before she could, the bastard clogged her over the head." Jax told all of them. "And when you hurt a member of the family, you hurt everyone."

Tig seemed to stop breathing. No one got away with hurting the Princess of SAMCRO.

"Let's kill this son of a bitch." Tig said, feeling horrible about someone hurting Sophie, and the others agreed.

"Okay, what do we know?" Clay asked.

"We saw a couple of guys sporting Aryan ink. Not sure if they're Darby's guys." Jax said, lighting another cigarette, thinking about Sophie for the most part.

"And Macon Woods is right on the Lodi border. Darby's got a meth shack couple of miles from there." Clay added.

"Rape as retaliation." Bobby said, hating this.

"Certainly, in the Nord wheelhouse." Jax agrees.

"Tap into the Sanwa database. Find out of which Nords get hard for underage pussy." Clay told Juice, who was a skilled hacker.

"Bobby and I'll go after Darby." Tig said, contributing.

"And Jax will go to the hospital first. He needs to make sure that Sophie is okay, and that she doesn't get into any more trouble." Clay said before Church was over. He wanted Jax to get to the hospital as quickly as he could.

He knew that the others had everything under control until he came back.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I groaned as I felt myself wake up. I knew something happened when I tried to remember what went down. I looked around finding myself in a hospital room. I remembered having a panic attack during the night, and nothing after that. My head still hurt a lot, but not as much as it did last night. A cough caught my attention and I found my father, sleeping rather uncomfortably in a chair.

When did he get here? I asked myself mentally. He did not look comfortable but it made me love him even more for coming here.

I tried to move around a little at the same time as the doctor came through the door.

"Well, look who's up." The doctor said, waking my father in the process.

"Sophie, are you all right?" Dad asked, his voice still laced with sleep.

"Yeah… I just need to get out of this bed soon though." I answered, sitting up a little better.

"She'll be all right, Mr. Winston." The doctor confirmed. "She just need to take it easy for a few days, and she can go home today."

The doctor left the room, leaving me alone with my father.

"Did Gemma call you?" I asked, taking the cup of water he held out to me.

"Unser did. He didn't want to call Donna and Opie, but I've talked to him though. He'll call you later and Donna is making food for you for later." Dad told me and I couldn't help but rolling my eyes.

"I can take care of myself. I'm not invalid." I said, jumping out of bed, taking clothes he had brought for me.

"I'm not so sure about that." Dad said, making me turn to look at him.

"What are you talking about?"

"Sophie, you had a panic attack, thinking that you could've done more for that little girl, but don't let that get to you." My dad told me.

"Dad. It was nothing. I feel fine by now." I said a little annoyed.

"Then why won't you call and tell Jax about it?" He asked me. "He and I both know you suffered some pretty nasty panic attacks after Tommy died. You could never get over the fact that you couldn't save him, just like you couldn't save this one. But guess what, sweetheart; there's nothing you could've done about it. Not Tommy and not that girl."

My dad was never the one to sugarcoat things in my life. He always told me the truth, and he was right. I had a history of panic attacks. I haven't had one since before Opie went to jail and I experienced the loss of my case where a family I counseled, lost their newborn after a few weeks' struggle. It hit me hard, because it reminded me too much of Tommy.

"I know. I know I should tell him about it, but right now, I really need a shower and some new clothes. You should get going and see if there's anything you can do to help Tristen." I said with a sad smile.

"Okay, sweetheart." Dad sighed and kissed my forehead. "I love you, Sophie."

"Love you too, pops."

* * *

Dad left and I could finally take a shower. I was careful not to get my stitches wet, which meant I couldn't get my hair wet. Once I finished my shower, I got dressed in my favorite sweat suit, I didn't want to dress up that much, and I couldn't wait to get home.

As I walked back into my room, the doctor walked in with my discharge papers.

"Ah! Good to see you up! You're cleared to go, but you need to take it easy for a few days." He told me and I promised I would, not that he would know if I did. But I frowned when he handed me another piece of paper.

"What's this?" I asked looking at it.

"That's the information for your new therapist. I've read your file and I know you've had a history of panic attacks and I think it's time for you to talk to someone." The doctor answered.

"I don't need one. I'm fine." I said and gave the papers back to him.

"I strongly disagree." The doctor tried to argue.

"Look, I know you mean well, but this is not my first time. I can handle my shit a lot better than others. Besides, I have my family looking out for me. I don't need anyone else." I told him firmly, trying everything to get him off my back.

"I really hope you'll reconsider, but if you need to talk to anyone, you know where to find me." The doctor said before leaving my room. I rolled my eyes and reach for my purse, checking if everything was in place before getting ready to leave. Someone opened my door and I stood face to face with Gemma.

"Hey, baby girl. Ready to go?" Gemma asked me, kissing my cheek.

"Hey. Yeah. I really want to go and see how Tristen is doing." I answered her.

"Maybe you should go home and rest for a little while." Gemma tried to reason with me.

"I am not going to rest until I find the fucker that did this to an innocent young girl. I'll go all nutcracker on his disgusting ass." I said, practically growling.

"I know you do, but I hate to agree with the doctor, you need to rest, and not pop your stitches." Gemma said trying to reason with me. I was about to answer when I saw a familiar figure running through the doors of the hospital. Jax ran over to the front desk.

"In which room, can I find Sophie Winston?" Jax asked urgently.

"Miss. Winston discharged herself 30 minutes ago." The woman behind the desk told him.

"She left?" He practically yelled.

"No, Jax. I didn't leave yet." I said, making him turn and look at me. Relief filled his face and he walked towards me with a steady pace. Gemma left to give us some privacy.

"Are you all right?" Jax asked as he cupped my face in his hands. I winced a little from the pain in my head and he let go of me immediately.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little headache." I answered with a sigh.

"Did you get a glimpse of the guy that did this?" Jax asked, holding me close.

"No, I didn't. I never got the chance to." I said, suddenly feeling like crap. "I want to go see how she's doing."

"That will be a problem." Gemma said as she came back. "Elliot and Karen won't let anyone see Tristen. Not even you."

I pained me that Tristen didn't want to see me, but right now, I wanted nothing more than doing what I can to catch this sick freak. Jax kissed my temple and brought me out of the hospital.

"I need to get my car from the carnival." I said as Jax helped me into Gemma's car.

"I'll get some of the guys to pick it up. You're going straight home." Jax demanded.

"That's not happening." I argued back.

"Don't pull that shit right now, Sophie. You need your rest." Jax told me, shaking his head.

"Jax, you know me. I can't rest before that fucker is dead." I said with pleading eyes.

"I know you do, but… I can't let you get hurt again. I can't risk you getting hurt again." Jax told me, and it pained me to see him like this.

"I can't do nothing, Jax. Tristen's hurt and I couldn't do anything about it. Don't make me go home." I pleaded with tears in my eyes.

Jax did the only thing he could think of and kissed me, making my mind go blank. I could tell by his kiss, how afraid and lost he felt for me. I kissed him back, running my hand down his cheek.

"Please just go home and get some rest. I will let you know as soon as I have something." Jax said and I finally gave in.

"Fine." I said defeated. "But the minute you know something, I'll need to know. I can't stand knowing someone's out there, hurting kids."

"I promise I will let you know, but please go home now, okay?" Jax pleaded and I couldn't say no.

"Okay." I said, gaining another kiss from him. God! This man's going to kill me one day.

Jax gave me a wink before taking off on his bike, going after that bastard for sure.

Gemma got into the car, knowing that I really didn't want to leave the hospital.

"What do you say, we stay in the hospital to visit Abel and that way, you're not leaving." Gemma asked. "Maybe we can figure out how to talk to Tristen."

Right at this moment, I loved Gemma more than anyone could possibly know.

"I love you, Mama Gem." I exclaimed, hugging her tightly.

"Love you too, sweetheart." Gemma said, kissing my forehead. Gemma knew there was no way I could leave the hospital, knowing that Tristen was in there, going through something I didn't know how to help her get through. The only good thing about this day: The little boy waiting for me inside the NICU.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax came back to the Auto Shop, being greeted by Clay and the others.

"Is Sophie all right?" Clay asked him.

"Yeah. She's her stubborn self. Needed a few stitches in the back of her head. And she angry as hell. She wants to roast that fucker who did this." Jax said, placing his helmet onto the handle on his bike.

"That's good to know." Clay said, knowing that if Sophie wasn't fine, he didn't know if he could count on Jax for anything.

They stood there talking, when a cop car and Hale's Jeep drove into the yard. Jax groaned inwardly, not wanting to deal with those assholes right now. They didn't need this.

"You girls selling cookies?" Clay asked as they walked towards them.

"We're investigating a sexual assault." Hale answered and Jax thought it would be best to act clueless.

"You serious?" Jax asked him.

"Yeah. I need to talk to all your guys that were at the carnival last night. If they're not here, get them here now." Hale demanded them.

"You think a Son had something to do with that rape?" Clay asked him.

"Half of them have violent crimes on their rap sheets. Just following logic." Hale said, making Jax roll his eyes without Hale noticing.

"Wasn't it just last week four Oakland cops were busted for prostitution and rape?" Jax asked him. "Logic tells me we should ask where your dick was last night."

"And don't say 'In your Mama'." Clay warned him.

"Officer Mann and Fain will be taking your statements. It could take hours." Hale warned him back.

"I'm trying to run a business here." Clay grumbled and Hale couldn't help but smile smugly.

"We can do it here, at the station house… wherever you want to do it." Hale told him. "And don't say 'In your mama.'"

Hale left them with the two officers after that, making Jax inwardly groan. He didn't have time for this right now. He had a bastard to find.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

Gemma and I walked back into the hospital, heading for the NICU department. Gemma went on a coffee run, as I walked into Abel's room. Once again, Rosie was there, checking on him. When she saw me, the professional part of here disappeared and her motherly instinct kicked in.

"Oh, sweetheart! Are you all right?" She asked in panic. Did I really look that dreadful?

"I'm okay, Rosie. I'm all stitched up. How's my man doing?" I answered, looking at the growing Teller boy.

"Oh, he's just fine. Getting stronger by the day." Rosie said, looking at me with that kind look of hers. "It's not long before he can come out of that incubator, and then, he will be the bouncing baby boy I know he can be."

I looked down at him, feeling the smile forming on my face.

"Hey, sweetheart." I said with a soft voice. It seemed as if he recognized my voice, and turned his head to where he heard the sound come from.

"Did you see that, Rosie?" I asked with a huge smile on my face.

"Sure did, sweetheart. He knows your voice, and he knows that you're his mama." Rosie answered and that made me look at her.

"Rosie. You and I both know, I'm not his mother. I didn't give birth to him." I said sadly.

"Do you really think that giving birth to someone means that's the only way you could be a mother?" Rosie asked with her eyebrows raised. "Honey, think about it for a little. You're more to that boy than most people in this world. The only thing more important to him, is his father. But no matter what, you'll always be special to that boy."

Rosie left the room after that, leaving me with Abel alone. I looked down at the little boy, and I knew she was right. He would always be special to me. But no matter what, I wouldn't take Wendy's place. She deserved to get to know her kid.

"I'll be right back, baby." I told the little boy and walked out of his room.

* * *

I walked towards Wendy's room, to see if she was awake yet. I looked through the window, and saw that she was and she wasn't alone. Tara was there, talking to her.

"Feeling better?" Tara asked her.

"A little dopey, so to speak." Wendy told her.

"When you're feeling better, I'll take you to see your son." Tara told her, and I thought that it was a nice thing for Tara to do. Maybe Tara had a heart after all.

"Yeah, okay. Has Jax been around?" Wendy asked her, hoping that he wouldn't have ignored him.

"I don't know, you should ask Sophie about that." Tara told her, and I knew that he had been around, and it didn't bother me that he was. I think it would bother me more if he wasn't looking after the mother of his child. I would kick his ass if he didn't.

"They said you had a friend smuggle in that syringe of meth." Tara said, trying to get some info from Wendy about what Gemma did to her.

"Yeah, I just signed the affidavit. Hospital's a little nervous about the liability issues." Wendy said, feeling guilty about what she did.

"I'm sure they are."

"The two women that loved Jackson Teller. Could we be at more opposite ends of the shit spectrum?" Wendy said with a chuckle.

"Yeah, we're not that different. We both know that we're never going to be Sophie. Not even if we tried." Tara said.

"Save it, sweetheart. I don't need a pep talk or comparing me to Sophie. I know what I am." Wendy said, rolling her eyes.

"So do I. And you're not suicidal. You didn't have anyone smuggle in that dose. I have a pretty good idea who might have delivered it." Tara told her, making Wendy defensive.

"Don't go down that road."

"She's the one who injected you?" Tara urged on, and I knew she was talking about Gemma.

"No! I stared at that five-mil tube for over an hour, and then I pumped it into my favorite vein. End of story." Wendy told her.

"Why?"

"If you don't know why, then you and me… we're nothing alike." Wendy said, turning away from Tara, signalizing that she wanted her to leave. Tara sighed and walked away. When she closed the door to her room, she finally saw me.

"Are you eavesdropping now?" Tara asked a little rudely.

"No, I just happened to hear what you're talking about. I thought I should go visit Wendy to see how she's doing and I overheard what you were talking about." I answered honestly. Tara seemed to believe me and nodded, before walking down the corridor with me.

"So, I heard you were there when Tristen was hurt." Tara said and I flinched. "How's the head?"

"It'll be fine. I'm more worried about Tristen. She's just an innocent, little girl. I hope they find the bastard and castrate him, or more." I said, letting my anger get the best of me.

"Look, it's not my place but… From what I read in your file, you have a history of panic attacks. Maybe you should reconsider the offer of talking to a therapist." Tara told me with a low voice.

"Why doesn't it surprise me that you snooped through my files. Look, Tara, whatever you believe, I'm going to be fine. I'm a strong woman, and I won't have any panic attacks again. I don't need to talk to some shrink. I'm not a fucking screw-up." I said harshly.

"Okay, fine. But if you find that you need it, come to me and I'll make sure you'll get in within the hour, okay?" Tara offered. I wasn't sure if I could trust that, but still, she made a lot of sense.

"Fine." I agreed and we walked together in silence. That was until Tara got a phone call. I stood close enough to hear the conversation.

 _"Hello?"_

 _"Hey. I'm glad I'm not sick. You're a hard doctor to track down."_

Without answering, Tara ended the call and she looked so shaken up.

"Tara, are you okay?" I asked, but before she could answer, Hale approached us.

"Are you okay?" Hale asked the both of us.

"Yeah, just work." Tara said quickly.

"Oswald girl?" Hale said and that alerted me a little more.

"The end of the hall."

"Thanks. Would you mind coming with me?" Hale asked me and I couldn't say no. I needed to know what he was up to.

"Sure." I agreed, turning towards Tara. "I'll talk to you later, okay?"

Tara only nodded and hurried down the hall.

"What do you need from me, Hale?" I asked, almost having to run after him to keep up with him.

"Maybe it will be helpful for the Oswald's." Hale mumbled as we closed in on the room Tristen was in. I was beyond nervous about seeing her again, but maybe it would help me as much as it would help her.

When we got to the room, Elliot and Karen met us on the outside. Elliot told us what he remembered about yesterday.

"We went to get ice cream, and we saw Tristen and Sophie riding the Spinout." Elliot said, looking at me.

"Yes, that's right, and then I told her to stay put as I went to get some cotton candy, but before I knew it, she was gone. I didn't know where she went after that." I said, trying to relive those moments.

"A guy working the ride said that she stood there for a few minutes and then she walked towards Sophie, but somewhere along the way, she got distracted, but he couldn't tell from what." Hale said, and it made me shiver. Why didn't I just take her with me? How stupid I was. "Is there anything else you can think of, something that may not seem as something big?"

"We don't know anything else. All that I do know, is that if Sophie hadn't left her alone, she wouldn't have been in there, scarred for life." Karen said, looking at me with both sorrow and anger in her eyes. She walked closer to me, making me feel like a kid again. "How do you live with yourself?"

I felt the tears burn in my eyes, and I knew that she was right, Karen just put it out there.

"Karen…" I started to say, but she just turned around and walked back into Tristen's room. The three of us stood there in an awkward silence. I tried to not cry.

"Sophie… she doesn't mean it. She's just scared." Elliot started to say.

"No, it's okay, Elliot. I blame me too. And please tell Tristen that I'm so sorry." I said and walked away with before they could see me crying. I practically ran back towards Abel's room and Gemma came out to meet me.

"Sophie, where did you go? You weren't here when I got back with coffee." Gemma said but I couldn't answer her. "Sophie?"

I just shook my head and wrapped my arms around her, crying into her chest. Gemma took me into her embrace and whispered soothing words into my ear.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

After Tig gave the police officers his infamous 'tranquiccinos', the Sons could finally move out of the Auto Shop, and met up with Half-sack at the carnival, where he had followed Hale.

"Been talking to the Fun Town carnies for over an hour." Half-sack told them.

"Stay on him." Jax ordered, and Half-sack didn't really want to leave on his little scooter.

"Think you guys can double up, let me take one of your bikes?" Half-sack asked in hope.

"No unless he grows tits." Jax said, gesturing to Chibs who started laughing.

"Big tits. Huge tits." Chibs told him.

"He's going." Jax said as Hale drove away from Fun Town. Half-sack let out a sigh but did as he was told and followed the deputy sheriff.

"How is Sophie?" Chibs asked as they parked their bikes.

"Pissed off, scared, blaming herself for what happened to that little girl. She would be here with us, if I had allowed it, that is. So let's do this for her and Tristen." Jax told him and Chibs couldn't agree more. They walked up to the workers with a photo of Tristen.

"See this girl last night?" Jax asked them.

"Who are you?"

"Concerned citizens." Chibs answered. "And what did you say to that cop?"

"Why don't you ask him yourself?"

"'Cause we are asking you, Uncle Winky." Jax said, grabbing a hold of the man in front of him.

"This girl got raped less than a mile away, and my girl was jumped, trying to save her. Shit like that doesn't happen in our town, which points to an outsider." Jax told him, trying to contain his anger.

"And there's not much outsiders than you muppets." Chibs said in disgust. The carnival men started to gather around them, but Jax remained calm.

"Hey. Hey, it can go that way if you want." Jax said, showing off his knife. The men seemed to back off, not wanting any more trouble.

"All right. Tell you what I told the cop. All my guys were here, powering down rides, chaining up the booths. Security guards your town hired will tell you the same thing." The man told them, and Jax didn't seem to get any closer to figuring out who was behind it.

* * *

Jax figured it was best to go talk to Unser. The chief may not like him that much, but he still did what the club asked of him. Jax and Chibs stopped by the barber shop, where Unser used to go.

"Give us a minute, Floyd." Jax asked the old barber.

"I'll give you two. And give my best to Sophie, yes?" Floyd said, leaving Jax with Unser.

"All right." Jax argreed.

"Jesus Christ. My one peaceful moment of the day." Unser said with a grumble.

"we need to know where Hale's at with the Oswald case." Jax told him.

"Do you have any idea how much heat I'm getting on this?" Unser asked. "I do anything to compromise this case…"

"I'm not asking you to compromise. Just tell me what you know." Jax shot in.

"Got nothing. No leads, no witnesses. Sophie doesn't remember seeing anyone until she was knocked out. Only one that knows anything, is the girl, and she's saying she's got no memory of it. And Karen won't let anyone near her. Guess I don't blame her. Probably do the same if it was my kid." Unser said with a sigh.

"All right." Jax said in defeat, and started to walk out of the barber shop.

"Jax, you guys cannot screw me on this. I don't catch this rapist, I'm under the microscope. That's just bad for all of us." Unser warned him.

"Don't worry, chief. We'll catch him." Jax said, before walking outside.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I hated crying so much, but this case really got to me. Karen blamed me and I couldn't be angry about that. I would have blamed me too. Gemma let me get it all out, before we sat down, and just stayed with Abel, and that made me feel better.

"Hey, sweetheart. Are you okay by yourself while I go to the bathroom?" Gemma asked me.

"Yeah, I'll just sit here with Abel." I told her, looking back at the little boy in the incubator. I looked at my phone to see if Jax had left me a message, but I guess he was busy, because he hadn't check in on me yet.

A few minutes later, Gemma came into the room, with a bewildered look on her face.

"What's wrong, Gemma?" I asked alarmed.

"Darby's here." She said quickly.

"What?" I asked, not believing her. Why would he come here, when him and his men were suspects in Tristen's case?

"Yeah, he just walked in and we need to make sure that we don't lose him, okay? I've already called Clay." Gemma told me and I just nodded. I wanted to help as much as I could.

After some time, Gemma told me that we should take a break and we both went outside to take a smoke. We sat out there in silence, when I suddenly saw Darby walking out the main entrance.

"Gemma!" I said, alerting her.

"Shit!" She exclaimed, trying to figure out what to do.

"How you doin', Ernie?" Gemma asked, making him stop. Darby looked at us, giving us that disgusting smile, making me gag.

"It's going good. How's the Queen and Princess of bikers?" Darby asked us.

"Holding it together. What brings you here?" Gemma asked before I could talk back to him.

"Four packs a day finally caught up with mom. Stage four lung cancer." Darby said, and I kind of felt bad for him.

"Sorry to hear that." I told him sincerely. As suspected, Darby ignored me and only looked at Gemma.

"You look real good, Gemma. Clay must be keeping you happy." He told her, and I hated his flirting.

"Does the best he can." Gemma said, trying to keep her role, looking at his tattoos. "Interesting new accessory."

"Picked it up on my little retreat in Chino. It's simple, but it says it." Darby told her.

"Jewish doctors keeping your mother alive, must love it." Gemma said.

"That's right. You got a little Jew in you, don't you?"

"A bit. On the angry Russian side. It was nice talking to you Ernie." Gemma told him as a few of the Sons rode into the lot. "Got to catch my train back to Auschwitz."

"Hey, Sophie…" Darby called after me.

"What?" I asked, not wanting to be near him more than I had to.

"Your mom says hi." Darby told me with a smirk, knowing very well how I feel about my mother. Darby knew my biological mother very well. Why wouldn't he? She became Darby's girlfriend a few years ago, but still, she wanted nothing to do with me. Darby loved rubbing it in my face. I wanted to attack him but, Gemma grabbed me by the arm, as Clay, Bobby and Tig walked up to him.

"He's not worth it, baby girl." Gemma said with a low voice, and I knew she was right.

* * *

Gemma and I walked back into the hospital, leaving the boys to talk to Darby. I cannot believe he would bring my mother into this. No, scratch that… She's not my mother, she never was.

"Are you okay?" Gemma asked me, keeping her hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah. It's just… I hate that guy." I answered with a hiss.

"I know, sweetheart. He's a bastard." Gemma said, ruffling my hair.

"Hey! Watch the stitches!" I said, and I could tell Gemma felt bad.

"Sorry! I forgot!" Gemma exclaimed and I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her.

Gemma and I stayed for the most part, with Abel. I love being there for him and I would do whatever it took, making sure Abel was okay. I walked towards the bathroom, when I saw Hale talking to Tara.

"They think they're protecting her by building a wall around her." Hale told her.

"Tristen needs to talk to somebody." Tara explained. "Maybe she should talk to Sophie."

When I heard that, I decided to speak up, but Hale beat me to it.

"Karen won't let Sophie near her. She blames her for not taking care of her daughter. There's no way she'll be able to get anywhere near her." Hale told her, and it was the truth. They both knew how much I wanted to help. For once, Hale looked as if he had some compassion for me, other than suspicion.

"And I need something, anything, to help catch this guy so we're not doing this again with another girl." Hale told Tara.

"I know Karen needs to sign some insurance forms. I'll try to get an admin to keep her busy for a while." Tara said, wanting the legal way to solve this, but I knew what needed to be done.

"Thank you." Hale said, gratefully.

"I need a favor too. It's more of a question, really. It's gonna sound very dramatic." Tara said, and I couldn't stop from listening in on their conversation.

"If I had a restraining order against someone in another city, would it still be valid if I went someplace else?" Tara asked.

"That all depends. Every state's a little different. You think that someone might be coming here?" Hale answered.

"No. No, I doubt it. There's this guy I dated… during my internship in Chicago. Things got weird. He got a little… it's hard to explain." Tara said quickly.

"You wanna give me his name? I'll run it through the system." Hale offered, wanting to help his friend.

"No, that's okay. I'm just being paranoid." Tara said quickly, and I couldn't help but think about the call she got earlier. I had a feeling it was connected somehow.

I walked away, before I could hear the rest. I wanted Gemma to know about what I heard, and found her in the gift shop.

"What are you doing, Mama Gem?" I asked her.

"I was thinking about paying that crack-whore a visit." Gemma said, paying for flowers.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" I asked her.

"Do you have a better idea?" Gemma shot back, and I couldn't think of anything, and shook my head.

* * *

Together, we walked into Wendy's room, wanting to talk to her. Wendy didn't know that I was listening to her conversation with Tara earlier, and I didn't want her to know that I heard everything.

As we walked into the room, Wendy slowly opened her eyes, looking at us.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Wendy asked us.

"Something to brighten up your room." Gemma answered. "I understand you and the old girlfriend have become friends."

Wendy looked at the both of us for a few seconds, before reaching for her panic button.

"It's a little late for the panic button." Gemma said.

"I didn't say anything to anyone." Wendy shot back.

"We know that, Wendy, and that's smart." I told her, letting Wendy know that I was here.

"That's true…" Gemma said. "No one would believe you anyhow, that whole junkie thing."

Wendy looked at me for compassion, but I wasn't giving it to her at all.

"Wendy… I know you hate me, but all Gemma did… was giving you an option." I said, making Wendy look at me. "You're the one to take the coward's way out."

"Couldn't even do that." Gemma added, looking at her intently.

"We all can't be rocks like you, Gemma." Wendy said. "And I don't know how to compete with you, Sophie. No one gets close to you, ever."

"I don't know how you do it. Keep all the lies straight, all the dirty little secrets buried. God, your conscience must be locked up real tight." Wendy said, trying not to roll her eyes.

"Nothing gets in the way of me taking care of my family. Especially my conscience. But then you obviously can't grasp that, being a baby killer and all." Gemma said, and I felt really bad for Wendy for some reason. At the same time, a nurse walked through the doors.

"Need something, sweetie?" The nurse asked.

"Just some water for these flowers." I said, trying not to gain too much attention. Wendy sat there, wanting Gemma to leave the room.

"Can I talk to Wendy alone for a second?" I asked, making Gemma see red. "I'll be fine, Gemma."

She didn't like it, but left the room.

"Thank you." Wendy said when we were alone.

"For what?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"For getting that bitch out of here." Wendy said with a nervous laugh.

"Anyway. I talked to Tara earlier, and I wanted to know if Jax has been here at all." Wendy said, not knowing that I heard their conversation.

"Yes, he's been in here a few times, but you've been out of it for a while, so he's mostly been with Abel." I told her and I could see she was at the verge of tears.

"How is he?" Wendy asked, trying to keep her voice steady.

"He's growing. His vitals look good, and he's developing nicely. And he's a charmer." I said smiling, thinking about that precious boy I loved so much.

"I know you don't owe me anything, but I was hoping that you could talk to Jax, letting him know that I really want to see him." Wendy said, giving me a hopeful look. I wanted to say no, but somehow, I could see a mother, wanting to make up for her mistakes, and maybe if she saw what she had done to her son, would make her want to do better, get her act cleaned up.

"I can't promise you anything, but I'll talk to him. But if it's up to me, I would let you see him. Because, maybe then, when you see for yourself what you put that little boy through, you would be so full of guilt, you might actually have a chance to get clean once and for all." I said and without waiting for an answer, I walked out of the room, afraid that I would blow up if I stayed there any longer.

* * *

As I walked down the hall, I ran into Hale again.

"Would you watch where you're going?" I asked in anger.

"I'm sorry, Sophie, okay?" Hale said, not wanting to fight.

"Have you gotten anywhere with Karen?" I asked, mostly wanting to know if he had any leads.

"No, she still won't let me go in and talk to Tristen. But I did talk her out of pressing charges against you. She wanted you to suffer, for not taking care of her daughter." Hale told me and it hurt, knowing that Karen hated me so much for this.

"Excuse me." I said, walking away from Hale quickly. I walked around the corner, seeing Gemma standing outside Tristen's room.

"Everything okay, baby?" Gemma asked me.

"Yeah, I just want this day to end." I said with a sigh, wrapping my arm around her waist. We walked together back to Abel's room, deciding on staying there for the time being. I sat down in the chair next to the incubator, greeting the little boy, and once again, he turned his head towards my voice.

"See… that baby loves you." Gemma said, squeezing my hand.

"Yeah, I sort of like him, too." I said with a smile. "Now, grandma. You're on reading duty."

Gemma gave me that playful smile, but grabbed the book.

"Don't call me grandma, I feel old when you do that." Gemma told me, before she started to read. I curled up on my chair, listening to her reading Abel a story. It felt so peaceful, and I needed that. My mind was going crazy, and I tried so hard to remember if someone was watching Tristen and me when we were on the rides together, but I couldn't come up with anything. It's all a blur, and it makes my head hurt.

A tap on the window, broke me from my thoughts, and I looked up to see Jax standing there. I stood up quickly and walked out to meet him.

"Why doesn't it surprise me to find you here? Imagine my surprise when I went by your place, and Donna told me that you didn't show up." Jax told me and I couldn't help but feel guilty.

"I'm sorry. I just… I couldn't leave, knowing that Tristen is here, and she's probably scared." I told him and Jax wrapped his arms around me.

"We'll figure this out, okay?" Jax murmured into my hair as Gemma came out to talk to us.

"Thought you guys were on a hunt." Gemma asked him.

"Hit a dead end." Jax said with a sigh.

"The junkie's awake." Gemma informed him.

"Don't call her that." Jax told her, wanting to protect the mother of his child.

"All right. Sorry." Gemma said quietly. Jax looked back at his son laying there.

"You think he can hear you?" Jax asked, gesturing towards Gemma's reading.

"Yeah, I do. Every time Sophie talks to him, he reacts by trying to follow the sound. It's pretty awesome to watch." Gemma answered and Jax looked at me with a huge smile on his face.

"He already loves you." Jax told me and kissed my forehead. A slam of a door, alerted us that we weren't alone. We turned to find Elliot standing there, and he looked like hell. Gemma took the hint and walked back inside Abel's room. I stayed behind.

"Did you find the guy?" Elliot asked him.

"No, not yet. We need you to talk to your daughter again." Jax said.

"Tristen doesn't remember anything after she got off the ride with Sophie." Elliot told us.

"Gotta dig a little deeper. I mean, we need something. Did the guy have a car, was he black, was he white?" Jax asked, putting pressure on Elliot.

"She's still in shock!" Elliot hissed. "All right, Karen just wants her to rest."

"Look, Tristen's our only shot at finding this asshole. If you want our help," I told him and he kept his eyes on me.

"I'll talk to Karen. You find him." Elliot told us before leaving. Jax and I just stood there, looking at each other. I took a deep breath before saying anything.

"I think I need to go to the bathroom." I said, leaving quickly. I couldn't tell Jax that I wanted to go see if I could get into Tristen's room. I walked up to her door, seeing that she's alone. Her mother isn't there, so I use my opportunity. As the door crack open, the young girl stops playing with her phone and look directly at me. I can tell she's been through a lot, but when she sees me, it's like a burden falls off her shoulder.

"Hey, sweetie." I said softly and I could see her lips tremble.

"I thought you didn't want to see me." Tristen almost whispered.

"Why wouldn't I want to see you? I loved spending time with you." I said, sitting down on the bed next to her, grabbing a hold of her hand. "Look, Tristen. I am so sorry this happened to you. I want you to know that I want to do my best to help you get over this, but in order for me to do that, I need you to tell me what you remember about the man that hurt you." I said softly, trying to make this easier for her. Tristen sat there, and I could tell this was hard for her. Without warning, she threw her arms around my neck and sobbed into my chest. I tried my best not to cry myself, and held onto the scared little girl.

* * *

"I remember everything." She whispered in my ear, and when she finally slowed her sobbing, she told me everything. She remembered every detail about that fucker that did this to her.

I walked out of the room, bumping into Gemma.

"Sweetie, what did you do?" Gemma asked me when she saw my pale face. I felt sick and threw up into the nearest trashcan. Gemma helped me, holding my hair away.

"I know who did this." I said, wiping my mouth. Gemma looked at me with wide eyes as I told her what Tristen told me. Now, it was only for me to tell Jax.

I walked back to Abel's room, finding Jax standing there, watching his son.

"Jax. I know who it was." I said in a rush, trying to get every word out.

"Whoa, slow down for a moment. Take a deep breath and tell me again." Jax said, resting his hands on my shoulders.

"I know who did this to Tristen." I said, looking into those beautiful eyes. "It's was that creepy fucker. The clown that hit on me." I told him and I could tell that Jax was angry.

"Jesus! Does Hale know?" Jax asked his mom.

"No, not yet, but we can't stop them from telling him." Gemma answered him.

"Shit! Thanks, sweetheart." Jax said, giving me a kiss before starting to leave.

"Jax! I want to come with you." I said, surprising myself, really.

"No way. You've been through enough these past few hours." Jax said, dismissing the idea of me coming along with this.

"I don't think you understood me… I wasn't asking you to come, I was telling you." I said, crossing my arms over my chest. "I want to see that fucker suffer."

"You might as well let her tag along. She's made up her mind about this." Gemma told her son, and he sighed.

"Fine. Let's go." Jax said, grabbing my arm. We walked as quickly as we could and noticed that Karen was talking to Hale and another officer. I dragged Jax after me, practically running down the hall.

"Go start up the bike, I'll give us a head start." I told Jax, grabbing his knife. I sliced the tires of Hale's truck, and bolted towards Jax, who was waiting for me. He couldn't help but chuckle, looking at me strangely.

"You're awesome, you know that?" Jax said before speeding down the street. We went back to the Auto Shop, to meet the others and we rode together towards the carnival grounds. I wasn't even nervous when we stopped. I just wanted to go all nutcracker on that monster.

"Hey." Jax said, holding me back. "Please don't put yourself in the line of fire. Stay back, and do as we tell you, okay?"

"I promise. Let's get this asshole." I said, before earning a kiss from Jax. I did what I was told and stayed behind the SONS, and watched how they approached the team of workers.

"Hear you guys are harboring a fugitive." Jax told them, and I knew how pissed off he was.

"What are you gonna do about it?" The horrible man asked smugly.

"Citizen arrest." Jax answered truthfully and punched the man in the face. I watched as the SONS fought the workers and it was hard not doing anything to help.

"Bobby, Chibs. Take Sophie with you and find him!" Clay yelled and I started to move. I joined Chibs and Bobby, on a mission to hunt down this bastard.

We ran around one of the wagons, and me being first, saw the bastard coming towards me. I don't know how I got the strength, but I put my weight on it and kicked him as hard as I could in the balls. He screamed out in pain, crumbling to the ground.

"Looks like you were wrong, fuckboy. It's seemed as if it was me that made you scream. You son of a bitch!" I told him dangerously. "She was a thirteen-year-old girl!" I brought my knee up, kicking him in the jaw. Bobby and Chibs had to lift me away from him, so I didn't kill him. I have never been this angry before. The two boys grabbed the man by the arms, and hauled him up.

"Damn it, Sophie. You couldn't have waited to do this?" Bobby complained that they had to support even more of his weight than necessary. I watched as they carried his sorry ass towards the van.

"Hey guys! We got him, let's go." Bobby told them and I could hear the boys cheer. I walked with them, with Jax's arm around my waist. As Bobby and Chibs threw the bastard into the car, Clay got a look at him.

"What did you guys do to him?" Clay asked them.

"Oh, it wasn't us. Sophie went all Kung Fu on his ass." Chibs told them and everyone looked at me. I stood there, and I was shaking.

"That's my girl." Jax said, kissing me roughly.

"Let's go." Clay ordered and Jax made me ride in the van with Kip, and that was a good idea. My hands were shaking so bad, I couldn't have held onto Jax, even if I wanted to.

"Are you all right?" Kip asked, glancing at me as we followed the bikers.

"Yeah… I know that I'm not the most violent person, but it felt so good, kicking his ass." I exclaimed, earning a chuckle from Kip.

"Yeah, you're crazy, Sophie. Remind me not to ever mess with you." Kip said, focusing on the road.

* * *

We stopped the van outside in the woods. Far away from traffic and witnesses. Jax kept me close to him, as we waited for Elliot Oswald to reach our destination. When Elliot stopped his car, I could tell he was livid. He was scared, angry, and sad because of what happened to his daughter.

"Here's the scumbag, raped your little girl." Clay told him. Elliot walked up to him, making the bastard even more scared. He took out a knife of some sort, showing it to him.

"The cattle guys call this an 'Elsie maker'. It's used to cut the balls off bulls. Strip him." Elliot demanded and Bobby and Chibs did just that. When the bastard's stomach was revealed, a lot of scars was noticeable. Something had happened to this man in the past.

"Jesus." Elliot exclaimed.

"He deserves every second of the pain." Clay told him. For some reason, I kind of felt sorry for him. He didn't choose to be this way. Something messed him up for sure. I'm not saying that it gives him a free pass to rape someone, but I kind of wished that we had given him to the police instead.

"What do you want to do here, Elliot?" Clay asked and he hesitated. "We had a deal."

Elliot couldn't do it, and dropped the knife on the ground.

"I'm sorry." Elliot said, and he was crying. It made my eyes water as well. "I'm sorry, I can't do it."

Elliot started to walk back to his car and I could see Clay was thinking hard. I knew what was coming, and I knew it wasn't going to be pretty.

"Hold him still." Clay ordered.

"Clay!" Jax yelled but he didn't listen.

When I saw, Clay picking up the knife, Jax pulled me towards him, so my face was buried against his chest.

He knew I shouldn't be watching this, but it didn't make the sounds go away. I could hear the man screaming in excruciating pain and I tried my best to cover my ears. Why did I have to been so stubborn and go with them on this thing?

The screams and the sound of tearing flesh, was horrible, and I just wanted it to stop.

"Let him bleed out." Clay told the SONS and I looked over at Kip. He was having a hard time with this, only having one testicle and all.

"Bury him in the woods. Mark the grave. Pick those up and gift wrap them." Clay demanded his crew. "Put this in a bag. Make sure you don't touch it. It got Oswald's prints all over it."

I couldn't help but feel disgusted by that man.

"What the hell are we doing here?" Jax asked him angrily.

"Taking out some real estate insurance. Making sure Oswald doesn't sell off those tracts of lumber acreage." Clay answered him.

"So, you knew this was coming. Whether Oswald had the nerve or not, this whole hunt was about blackmail." Jax stated, finally realizing Clay motive.

"Well, actually, the leverage was just a fortunate by-product of my community spirit." Clay answered and gave the knife to Tig.

"Hey. You want me to be your number two, protect this club? Then I gotta know where you're taking us, otherwise, there's no trust." Jax said, not letting me leave his arms. "And if you and me don't trust each other, SAMCRO has got a problem."

"If Oswald's land goes commercial, that means housing developments. Populations rises, brings more cops, more state and federal involvement. Charming goes Disney, and SAMCRO gets squeezed out by the most dangerous gang of all: Old white money." Clay said in a low voice, creeping me out.

"Now, you know."

Clay walked away and I wanted nothing more than to go back home. Jax looked down at me, and he saw the tears in my eyes.

"Let's get you home, darling." He whispered against my forehead, and I couldn't agree more.

* * *

When we got back to the clubhouse, I mostly wanted to go to bed, but Jax brought up onto the roof. We sat there, sharing a cigarette as the sun was about to rise, when he took out something.

"I found that book my dad wanted you to give me when the time was right." Jax told me, and I wanted nothing more than to disappear.

"Are you mad at me for not showing you this yet?" I asked, grabbing his hand.

"No, are you kidding? You didn't do anything wrong." Jax exclaimed. "But… did you ever read it?"

"No, of course not. I would never do that to you." I told him honestly. "I just did what John asked me to do. I kept it hidden, knowing that when you found it, you would be ready, and I guess you are now."

Jax kissed my temple and opened the book for us to read, and I was curious about what John actually wrote back then.

 _"When we take action to avenge the ones we love, personal justice collides with social and divine justice. We become judge, jury and God. With that choice comes daunting responsibility. Some men cave under that weight. Others abuse the momentum. The true outlaw finds the balance between the passion in his heart, and the reason in his mind. His solution is always an equal mix of might and right."_

I stopped reading as Jax closed the book. We looked at each other, not knowing what we really read.

"Jax… I know it's not my place, but… I think that you should let Wendy see Abel. She needs to face her consequences, and get her life straightened out. Maybe this will be a jump-start for her." I told him and Jax just sat there looking at me for a few minutes. He smiled at me, and leaned in for a kiss. It melted my heart right away. I loved this man so much and I wanted to tell him soon.

"Let's go to the hospital." Jax told me and stood up. I agreed, and joined him.

* * *

It was bright and early when we got there, and we went straight to Wendy's room. Jax still held onto my hand, as he opened the door.

Wendy looked at us, and she knew that I had talked to Jax about seeing Abel. It was hard for Jax, seeing her like this.

"I don't want you hurting yourself, Wendy. Not over this. What happened to Abel's not your fault." Jax told her.

"Oh, yeah. I'm powerless. That bullshit excuse is even getting old to me." Wendy said with a sarcastic chuckle.

"It's not that. Us getting back together… I knew that would turn bad. I didn't want to be married. No way I was ready for a kid. When you got pregnant, I hated you. Hated that you gave him a name. So, I bailed." Jax told her with honesty. "Him born tweaking, his belly hanging out, that's on me. And if it weren't for Sophie, I wouldn't even have considered this."

I brought the wheelchair into the room, so that Wendy could go see her son. Wendy couldn't stop crying as we reached the NICU, and I knew it was hard for her. Just before Jax was about to wheel Wendy in to see him, I grabbed a hold of his arm. Jax looked at me with his tired eyes.

"Hey. I know it's not the best time to tell you this, but… I love you, Jackson." I said, kissing his cheek. Jax didn't respond at all and just rolled Wendy into Abel's room, leaving me on the outside, looking in.

I watched how Wendy cried over her boy, and how Jax comforted her. And while I was standing there, I couldn't help but feel jealous, and worst of all, scared. I just told Jax that I loved him….

And he didn't even respond…

* * *

 **So, there it is. A lot of things went down in this chapter.**

 **Sophie told Jax that she loves him, but didn't get any response... how do you think he will handle that. Should Sophie blame herself for maybe saying it too early?**

 **Let me know what you thought of this chapter.**

 **Until next time xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***SOAROCKS: I know, right! So excited!**

 ***bethie86: Thank you so much! I love that line at the bar :P.**

 ***xxcouriousmexx: Thank you so much! And you know that Jax will mess things up, every once in a while ;)**

 ***emmettluver2010: Thank you! I'll take your thought into consideration.**

 ***PaigeYO: Thank you so much for your kind words!**

 ***Clb83: Thank you! Here's the next chapter ;)**

 ***love100008: Thank you so much! Sorry for the wait, but here's the new update!**


	7. Winner of the Losing Game

**Would you look at that! I finally updated this story! I've had the chapter almost finished for a long time, but then I just put it in the "do it later" pile, and then I never got around to finish it.**

 **But here it is! The next chapter of Sophie and Jax's story.**

 _ **I do not own "SOA" only my OC.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 _A cab stopped outside the sheriff's office. Deputy Hale glanced over at it as he made his way towards the station. He really couldn't be bothered about it._

 _"Officer!" A man called for him._

 _"Yes?" Hale answered with a question._

 _"Agent Kohn, A.T.F., Chicago Three division." The man told him._

 _"Deputy Chief Hale." Hale said, presenting himself. "What brings you here?"_

 _"Been working on an interstate weapons case. Outlaw crew in your town may be involved… Sons of Anarchy?" Agent Kohn said and Hale couldn't stop the smug smile forming on his face._

 _"Welcome to Charming." Hale said, as he showed the agent into the station. Things just got interesting._

* * *

Jax was feeling as if he was on the edge, his skin was crawling. Maybe out of guilt, but he couldn't seem to calm down. He wanted things to go away quickly, and tried his best to bury himself with work. Jax stood in the auto shop, talking to Clay about a bike, at the same time Tig pulled up, giving them bad news.

Someone from A.T.F had just arrived in town, and that was bad news for them.

"We've taken every precaution to stay out of A.T.F's crosshairs." Clay told them. "No buts, no investigations for five years. We don't know this guy is here for us."

"Hale flagged Bluebird as our gun warehouse." Jax said, trying not to seem affected about everything that's happening around him. "He's pissed off we made Unser crush the case, and he called in the feds. I think it's gotta be about us."

"Be my guess." Bobby agreed.

"And we got a garage full of 25 to life." Tig added.

"Any legit place we store those guns is a straight line back to us."

"Can't Rosen get us some storage short term?" Bobby asked.

"He's killing Bluebird, man. He's setting up a dummy corp. It takes a few weeks." Clay told him.

"We got that call for Jury last week. Mayans pressing the Devil's Tribe to pay a vig… to keep running book and pussy out of Nevada." Jax said, looking at Clay. "Look. Maybe I do head to Indian Hills, offer Jury some advice. He offers our AKs a safe house."

"No. No. That's a risky ride, brother." Juice said, not agreeing with this at all. "Northern Nevada is Mayan territory. They're still looking to settle the score from our little raid."

"The Mayans know that the Tribe's a brother club. Part of asking for that vig is about shitting on us." Bobby said, taking a drag of his cigarette. "They knew Jury would call. "They're going to be watching."

"That's what I'm saying. That's why just me and you go, under the radar." Jax told Bobby. "We'll bring the guns in the same way."

"And you think you can bring Jury on board?" Clay asked.

"Shit. My dad saved his ass in Tây Ninh. He owes the Tellers a chit. Look man, we're not gonna go cowboy. I promise." Jax said when he saw the frown on Clay's face.

"Promise." Bobby mocked beside him.

"Low profile. I don't want wetbacks knowing we crossed into N.V. They pull this off, I want you and Juice driving the barrels." Clay told Tig.

"Done. We'll need something big though." Tig said.

"I can talk to Sophie. I know they have a huge van for when they go out to promote fundraisers and shit. That may just give you a lower profile." Piney said, knowing that it would be the least Sophie would do for them and it would be a good time for Piney to talk to his daughter.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

 _"_ _I love you."_

That's what I told Jax, and I meant it from the bottom of my heart.

That was almost a week ago, and he's been distant ever since. I've tried calling him and showing up at the Club house. But he's always busy or, he's not there. Did I scare him off by stating my feelings too early?

I don't want to be this clingy woman, but he's making me so confused. He tells me he wants to do things right, but then again… Why would he freak out?

* * *

I was just about to walk out the door, when I heard a bike pull up into my driveway. I was hoping it would be Jax but sadly, it was my father. Don't get me wrong, I love my father.

"Hey. What are you doing here at this hour?" I asked as dad stopped his bike.

"Do I need a reason to visit my only daughter?" My dad asked, kissing my cheek.

"Well, when you're here before ten in the morning, then yes." I said with a grin.

"I just wanted to see how you were. I know you've been having a rough time with Jax lately." Dad said and I could feel the smile vanish from my face.

"I'm not sure what's going on to be honest." I said exhaling deeply. "I was stupid enough to say some stuff he clearly wasn't ready for. I haven't heard from him in a week. But that's on me, right?"

My dad looked at me as if he didn't understand what I was talking about.

"What the hell happened between the two of you? I thought you were at a good place?" My dad asked me.

"I thought so too, but he freaked out." I said, with a sigh. "What's wrong with you men?"

"Oh, you don't want to look under that rock, sweetheart." Dad said, making me laugh.

"So, what do you need?" I asked him, knowing he just didn't come to check up on me.

"I need to borrow the company van for a run." Dad answered and I knew what that meant. He needed it for the guns.

"Dad, you know how it can hurt my company if you're caught." I started to say.

"Yes, I know, but by driving your van, it's the ultimate way for us not to get caught. I promise we'll be careful with it." Dad said, and he did make a point. By using the van, they could move more freely. I sighed and walked back into the house to get my purse. I always had a spare key with me at all times.

"The things I do for you." I said, handing him the key. "And tell Tig that if he damages my van, I will personally castrate him with my razor."

"I'll make sure he gets the message. Thanks, sweetheart." Dad said and kissed my cheek. "And I'll tell Jax to get his head out of his ass."

I watched as my dad drove away on his bike. I decided then and there, I would not think about Jax today. I got into my car, ready to get to work, when I couldn't get the engine running.

"Come on, stupid piece of shit!" I hissed at my car, and just like she always does when I talk to it, the moody cow came to life. I prayed that it would stay alive until I reached the Auto shop.

Today was not the greatest day for me. It was as if it was mocking me.

* * *

I drove my car into the lot, seeing the guys getting ready for wherever they were going, and I hope I didn't run into Jax.

Chibs came out of the garage, when he heard my car backfired.

"Shit, Sophie. What's wrong with her?" Chibs asked as I jumped out of it.

"Well, I was stupid to think that after 14 years, she would still run as smooth as she used to." I said, petting the hood of my 1969 Chevrolet Camaro.

Chibs wrapped his arm around me.

"Let me see what I can do, Princess." Chibs told me and I felt safe.

"Thank you. Any chance I could borrow a car?" I asked, knowing I needed to get to work.

"Let's go to the office and check." Chibs said, ushering me towards the office. Just as I walked through the door, I saw Jax coming out of the Clubhouse. I had to pry my eyes away from him, not wanting him to notice me.

"Everything all right, Princess?" Chibs asked me.

"Yeah. Or, I don't know. Everything's a mess." I said honestly. "And by mess, I mean Jax."

"What the fuck happened?"

"I don't know. He freaked out, I guess." I said with a shrug.

"Fuck me. That boy will never learn." Chibs said, shaking his head. It was good to know I had Uncle Chibs to talk to.

"Yeah? I think I went a little overboard." I told him honestly. Chibs kept on looking for the keys to the spare car, but he couldn't find it. But I found it funny that he kept on cursing, trying to find it.

Another car pulled up, and it hurts, seeing Jax practically running up to it, seeing that it was Tara stepping out of it. He would talk to her, but not to me. That bastard.

"Sorry kiddo. I can't seem to find the keys." Chibs said in frustration.

"That's okay. I see Gemma pulling into the parking lot. I can just ask her for a ride to work." I said with a shrug. "Thanks anyway, Uncle Chibs."

Gemma was on her towards the office when she finally saw me.

"Hey, Sweetheart. What are you doing here?" Mama Gem asked, giving me a kiss on the cheek.

"I was going to work, when Carla was acting like a bitch again." I answered, pointing towards my car.

"I'm sorry, Sweetie. I know how much you love that car." Gemma said. She was the one who gave it to me, as a gift for passing my driver's license.

"Any chance you could give me a ride to work?" I asked hopefully.

"I would love to, but Jax asked me to give Tara a ride to work as well. Do you think that you'll be able to survive in the same car as her?" Gemma told me. I would rather not sit in the same car as her, but I was desperate.

"No, that's okay." I told her, swallowing my pride. "I'll meet you out at the truck."

I started walking over to Gemma's truck, wanting nothing more than to get the hell away from here.

Gemma didn't waste that much time, and walked over to me with Clay. They were talking about something, and gave each other a kiss.

"Ready to go?" Gemma asked me, and I just nodded. Tara didn't say anything, not knowing how to act at all.

"Sophie!" I heard someone yelled behind me, and I froze, knowing it was Jax.

"Hi." I said, trying to sound confident.

"Hey, darling. Look, I really think that we should talk about what happened." Jax said, not meeting my eyes.

"I'll say…" I responded in a huff. "Jax, I've been trying to talk to you all week, but you've not shown any interest to wanting to talk to me."

"I know I've been distant, but, you know me, Sophie. I don't know what I can tell you." Jax told me. "We can sit down and talk when I come back."

"That's the thing, Jax. I feel like I don't know you anymore. You should use this run to think about what you want. If not, then don't bother come knocking on my door when you get back. Because then, we would be over." I said, before jumping into the car.

* * *

Jax only stood there, looking at me, and I could finally see fear in his eyes. It's good to know that the fear of losing me, gave him that look.

Gemma looked at me, knowing that her son was a prick.

"Are you ready sweetheart?" Gemma asked me, and I just smiled.

"Of course, Mama Gem." I said, smiling the best that I could. We watched as Jax and Bobby drove off on their bikes. It was good to know that Jax would think about this, but I didn't feel that safe.

"Hey, Doc! You need to sign these!" We heard Kip yell from behind us. Tara walked up to him, dumb enough to leave her purse in Gemma's car. Gemma doesn't have that natural respect for privacy and dived head first into Tara's purse.

"Gemma, what the fuck are you doing?" I asked under a hush voice.

"Why the hell would that little pussy need a gun?" Gemma asked me, showing me a small handgun. It surprised me too, but now was not the time to try answering those questions.

"Put it back before she notices what you're doing." I hissed at her, as Tara walked back towards the car.

"Mind if I smoke?" Gemma asked Tara, acting as if nothing had just happened.

"And if I'd said yes?" Tara asked, implying that Gemma wouldn't have given a fuck either way.

"Right." Gemma said and drove off.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax didn't like it at all… Knowing that Sophie was mad at him, and that she made him chose between him, made him want to work a little harder on what to do next. He didn't want to lose Sophie, but the fact that she said, "I love you" too soon, really freaked him out for some reason. He didn't know why he freaked out. He loved her, but the fact that she said it first, freaked him out.

The ride with Bobby, was done in silence, and that's exactly what he needed. Or that's what he hoped he needed. In the distance, something caught Jax's eye.

"What do we got?" Bobby yelled over the wind.

"Mayans." Jax confirmed.

"So much for low profile." Bobby said sarcastically. One of the Mayans drew his gun, but had to move out of the way at the last second. Jax and Bobby sped up a little, as three of the Mayans turned and followed them.

"Two on three?" Jax suggested, as they tried to decide what to do. Bobby only nodded and they simply stopped their bikes rather quickly, and the Mayans couldn't stop in time and ended up in front of them. Both Jax and Bobby drew their guns, and fired of a few shots. The Mayans hauled ass out of there, trying to not get hit.

It did the trick, and the Mayans fled the scene.

Bobby and Jax, stopped at an old gas station, to get some food and something to drink. Jax used this as an opportunity to call Clay, to tell him about their meeting with the Mayans. He was not happy about the outcome about that conversation, and decided to call Sophie, just to hear her voice.

 ** _"_** ** _What do you want, Jax?"_**

 _"_ _I just want to talk to you darling. Is that a crime?"_

 ** _"_** ** _It is, when I told you that you should use this run to think about what you want. It doesn't seem as if you've been thinking that hard."_**

 _"_ _Jesus Christ, Sophie. I can't even talk to you, when I'm going through this shit Clay pulled off?"  
_

 ** _"_** ** _Of course, you can, but this isn't working. I told you that I loved you, and you just ignored me. You hurt my feelings, and it made me feel guilty because I feel that I pushed you. I really want you to think about this, and in order for you to do that, I don't want you to call me, and I don't want to talk to you. I don't want you to say it back to me, just because it's what I want to hear, I need you to mean it. I've gotta go."_**

Before Jax had the chance to say anything else, Sophie hung up on him. He hated that she felt like this, but for the most part, he was angry. Why would she have to put him on the spot like that? It pissed him off, and he felt trapped.

"Shit!" He exclaimed, wanting to throw the phone against the wall in frustration. He felt cornered and needed to somehow claw his way out of this shit. Sophie was being unreasonable. Yes, in his head, Sophie was unreasonable for asking this of him, for telling him something he wasn't ready to deal with.

Jax joined Bobby back to their bikes, only to find someone standing there, and this was not the time to piss Jax off.

A guy was sitting on his bike, and a girl tried to take a picture.

"Are you an idiot, take the picture." The man said to the girl, and it angered Jax that someone would talk to a woman like that.

"Here, let me do it." Jax offered, noticing that the girl had a busted lip.

"Holy shit. I told him not to sit on your bike." The girl rushed out. Feeling embarrassed for being caught.

"That's all right." Jax assured her, before turning to her boyfriend. "You look like a guy knows how to get his way. You do that to her lip?"

"Bitch has a mouth on her, you know?" The man said, trying to act cool.

"Sure, I get it. So, you like Harleys, huh?" Jax asked him.

"Yeah, they look good. But I'm way into the slant bikes for their speed, you know."

"Right, right. All right, say cheese." Jax said and took the picture, before handing the phone over to Bobby.

"That was before…" Bobby said with a sigh.

"Before?"

Jax used his helmet to punch the guy off his bike, and he used all his strength and anger behind the punch, making the guy fall to the ground.

"Don't ever sit on another man's bike, asshole." Jax hissed at him.

"Holy shit!" The girl exclaimed.

"Shut up, bitch!" The guy yelled, making Bobby see red, and kicked him in the stomach.

"A little respect for the fairer sex." Bobby said, snapping another picture of him. "That's after."

Jax hopped onto his bike, looking at the girl standing there, her mind completely blown. Jax looked at her, and she felt just opposite of what Sophie did, and right now, he needed something else to think about.

"Where you headed?" Jax asked her.

"Uh, no place special." She said with a blush, and Jax knew it would be no problem to rope her in.

"Me too." Jax said with that compelling smile of his.

"I'm Susie." She told him.

"I'm Jax."

 _"_ _And I'm nauseated."_ Bobby thought to himself, not wanting them to hear him. Bobby knew that this shit would backfire, and the only one hurting, would be Sophie.

As they drove off, they failed to see the man following them, taking their pictures as they drove down the road.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

Mama Gem dropped me off at work, and I was met with my secretary immediately.

"Thank God you're here, Sophie! It's been hell here without you." Martha said, handing me some messages.

"After the scandal at Fun Town, some of our investors for the upcoming charity is demanding your time, or they will pull their funding. You need to talk to them, or we're in deep shit." Martha said, and it still surprised me that a woman well up in her 50's to have a mouth like a sailor.

"Good morning to you too, Martha." I said going through the messages. "I will give him them a call as soon as I get to my office."

"There's no need. They're on their way here now." Martha told me.

"Fuck me sideways." I exclaimed. "All right, this will take me all day, so make sure not to make any other appointments for me. Unless it's the hospital. Jax is out of town, and if there's something wrong or something they want to discuss, they're calling me." I said, and speak of the devil, Jax is calling me right now. It's strange that the business part of me, can be professional, harsh, and strong, but when it comes to Jax Teller, I crumble like a piece of shit.

 ** _"_** ** _What do you want, Jax?"_**

 ** _"_** ** _I just want to talk to you darling. Is that a crime?"_**

 _"_ _It is, when I told you that you should use this run to think about what you want. It doesn't seem as if you've been thinking that hard."_

 ** _"_** ** _Jesus Christ, Sophie. I can't even talk to you, when I'm going through this shit Clay pulled off?"  
_**

 _"_ _Of course, you can, but this isn't working. I told you that I loved you, and you just ignored me. You hurt my feelings, and it made me feel guilty because I feel that I pushed you. I really want you to think about this, and in order for you to do that, I don't want you to call me, and I don't want to talk to you. I don't want you to say it back to me, just because it's what I want to hear, I need you to mean it. I've gotta go. I have work to do."_

* * *

I hung up the phone, knowing that I could not handle this at all. I wanted to say that everything was going to be okay, that I didn't care that he couldn't figure out how to respond to something so easily as 'I love you.'

A knock on my door, interrupted my thinking.

"Ms. Winston. The investors are here." Martha said, poking her head through the door.

"Fuck." I cursed under my breath. "Okay, send them in."

Martha nodded and opened the door wide. What I didn't expect, was for Martha to screw me over.

"Special delivery for the prettiest girl in Charming." A man with a husky voice, said. And it's a voice I would recognize anywhere.

The man in front of me, was covered in tattoos, he had that special aura that made you go into defense mode right away. Like he screamed danger and death. He was deadly, but not to me. The man in front of me, has been here practically all my life. He was like an extra uncle for me.

"What are you doing here, Happy?" I exclaimed, jumping up to greet him. Happy was one of the Sons from Tacoma. He and I, always got along. He was a tough man, but for some reason, he always had a soft spot for me.

"I was passing through, and Tig called me, saying they needed me on this run, and there's no way that I would pass through town without seeing my girl." Happy said, practically spinning me around in his arms.

"It's so good to see you, Hap. How you been, how's nana?" I asked handing him a coffee. Nana is Happy's mother. She's a sweet older woman, who Happy brought me to see when I grew up. She's been battling cancer for a few years, and Happy does everything for her. See… sweet guy at heart.

"She's alive and kicking. Sometimes, I forget that she's sick, because she's stubborn bastard that never knows when to back down. I mean, I'm a grown man, and still, she's forcing me to eat my fucking vegetables." Happy growled and I couldn't help but laugh.

"You should know that your mother is nothing to mess with… she's tougher than you, and that's saying a lot." I said shaking my head, trying my best not roll my eyes.

"So, I heard a rumor that you've been getting cozy with our VP." Happy said, and it turned my smile upside down.

"Yeah… I wish that I could tell you that, but… I guess I was wrong." I said with a sigh.

"Why? What did the fucker do now?" Happy asked, getting a little worked up.

"No! It was me, really." I found this urge to protect Jax. "I kind of told him that I loved him a little too soon, and he freaked out and now I think that I've lost my chance of ever being with him."

"So, Jax, the boy who have loved you since you were kids, freaked out because he got scared that shit just got real?" Happy asked, and I just let out a sigh.

"I should have known better than to push him, and now, I fear I've fucked up completely. He called me just now, and wanted to talk to me. But I told him that he should use this run to think about what he wants, and if that wasn't with me, then he should not show up on my doorstep when he gets back." I said.

"Well, when I see him later, I will knock some sense into him, making sure he makes the right choice. If not, I will personally kick his ass." Happy said. It was so nice having someone like his here. "No one hurts my Sophie, and get away with it."

It's no wonder why I loved this man. He was on my top five people of the ones I loved the most in this world, sadly only beaten by my father, Opie, Jax and Chibs. But I could always count on Happy. He was my best friend aside from Jax.

"Please don't make a big deal out of this. Whatever happens between me and Jax, stays between me and Jax. Even though I love you for caring." I told him, giving him a hug.

"I love you too, princess. Now, I would love to stay and chat, but I need to get going before Tig goes mad. We should get going soon." Happy said, kissing my head. "I'm proud of you, kiddo, and I want you to have your happy ending."

Happy walked out of my office, and I couldn't help but smile. He looked so scary to everyone else, but he was a good guy, a guy you could count on. Unless you pissed him off.

Now, I just had to push Jax and everything that's going on, out of my mind, and give my job the best, and not let it ruin my day…even though I would rather curl up into a ball and die.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax and Bobby finally reached Indian Hills, but not alone. Susie was still with them, and somehow, Jax managed to push Sophie in the back of his mind.

"Just don't ask any questions, okay? I'll let them know you're with me." Jax told her and kissed her. The nagging feeling came back. Those lips weren't right, it didn't feel right at all, but this is what he wanted to do.

"Jesus!" Bobby exclaimed under his breath. Thinking how bad this would end if Sophie ever found out about this.

"You know, you are the James T. Kirk of the M.C world." Bobby said, shaking his head.

"Going where no man has gone before." Jax said with a grin.

"Let me tell you, brother. I think every man's gone there before." Bobby said, referring to Susie.

"Jackson Teller!" A man yelled as he opened the door.

"Uncle Jury!" Jax exclaimed and gave him a hug.

"You guys remember Bobby." Jax introduced. Jury looked at Susie and thought she was someone else.

"Don't tell me this is little Sophie Winston?" Jury said, and everything became awkward.

"No, man. This is not Sophie. She had to work, man." Jax said, hoping he would accept that answer. Jury only shrugged his shoulders and walked inside the clubhouse again.

"M.C royalty in the house, folks. Jax Teller and Bobby Elvis of the Sons." Jury introduced, and everyone cheered to greet them in the way they deserved. "Let's make them feel at home."

Jax left Susie to talk to Jury, and he had the biggest smile on his face.

"I assume that's not your old lady." Jury said, only for his ears.

"No. I picked her up at the border. Just a little doe in the headlights." Jax said with a smile on his face. Jury never thought it would come to this, not after he last spoke to his mother a few weeks ago, over the phone.

"Cherry. This honey's with Jax. Show her the ropes, darling." Jury told a little petit brunette.

"Sure thing. Come on, sweetheart." Cherry said, and brought Susie with her. Jury turned towards Jax again, really making his voice low this time.

"I thought you were all over Sophie Winston. Last I heard." Jury said, making Jax posture change completely.

"Well, I needed a break from that." Jax said, trying to play cool, even though his mind was screaming for him to get his ass back to Charming. Jury understood that it was no point in dwelling on this, and let it go for now. Instead, they decided to catch up with each other over a drink.

"Started the sports book with the escorts and strip clubs. First stop over the border." Jury told him.

"Must be churning some serious cash." Jax stated. "Got the Mayans circling for percentage."

"They're jamming me up, Jax. If I don't pay the Mexican's they turn my business inside out. If I kick a vig up to them, I disrespect you guys." Jury answered.

"Tribe attracts a good membership."

"Eighteen. Real good boys."

"Still get along with local law?" Jax asked him.

"Douglas County? Sheriff likes the girls." Jury said with a smirk.

"Right."

"So how are you going to handle the Mayans?" Jury asked.

"We're hoping actually maybe you could help us out with the problem." Jax said hopefully.

"Sure."

"Got a garage full of AK-47s. Need a place to assemble and store them till we find a buyer. It's a temporary thing."

"Got a strip club out on 95. Huge basement. Private." Jury offered.

"Sounds perfect. I appreciate it." Jax said gratefully.

"You'll talk to Clay? Let me know how to handle this Mayan thing?" Jury said, looking for confirmation.

"You can talk to him yourself. He's on his way." Jax told him.

"Clay's coming out?"

"Yup. It's about the future, Jury."

"Future of what?"

"The Tribe." Jax said.

"Jesus, Jax. Patch over?" Jury exclaimed.

"It's time, Jury. This whole idea is blowing up. We don't patch you over, Mayans will run right through you." Jax tried to explain to him, making him understand how serious it really is. "We get a foothold in Nevada. You get status to protect your business. Best move for both clubs."

"A lot of my guys aren't SAMCROW." Jury argued.

"The ones that are cut out for it to make it. Others will fall off." Jax said, being reasonable.

"I'm not a young guy anymore either, Jax. I don't know how much outlaw I got left in me." Jury said.

"You'll do fine, Jury." Jax assured him, hoping this would work.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

After spending several hours at my office, talking to investors, and having meetings with the volunteers for the fundraiser in a few weeks, I finally needed a break. I decided to go out and take a coffee, when I suddenly had this urge to go and see Able. I haven't seen him in a few days, and it hurts psychologically that I haven't seen him. I feel like a mother abandoning her child. I packed up my stuff, and headed over to the hospital. Luckily, it wasn't that much of a walk. The sun was shining, but I couldn't say it felt good. My mind quickly turned to Jax, and how I just wanted to pick up the phone and make everything better. I hadn't heard from him at all, and that was what I wanted… why didn't it feel better? I shook off the feeling as I entered St. Thomas Hospital. The nurses and doctors I walked by, greeted me with a smile, and it felt good. I walked passed the children's unit, were kids with different kind of diseases and injuries was, and they light up when I caught their eye. I liked it, I loved that I made a difference, a good difference in their otherwise fucked up life. Not that I used those words around the kids.

I walked towards Abel's room and I got even more excited, knowing he would be there. I looked at him through the window, and he's getting so big, and perfect. I felt a punch in my heart, knowing I hadn't been there for a few days, and I was glad that he was alone, with no Rosie, giving me advise. I opened the door and walked in carefully. It seemed as if he was sleeping and I didn't want to disturb him.

But when I saw his movements, I just knew that he was awake.

"Hi there, little man." I said softly and Abel just went crazy, but not in a bad way. He just needed me to know that he had missed me and struggled, as if he wanted to get closer to me. I quickly grabbed a pair of gloves and put my hands through those little holes in his incubator. The moment I touched him, Abel calmed down, wrapping his teeny, tiny hand around my finger.

"It's okay, little man. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere." I told him, and I know that it's crazy, but I think he understood me. I loved the feeling of Abel knowing who I am, and that he responded to me that way. It made me think that I could tell Abel anything.

"You know, Abel. Regardless what happens between your dad and me, I will always be there for you, no matter what. And I want you to know how much I love you." I whispered, feeling the need to do so.

I watched Abel fall asleep, and stayed with him for a few hours, already decided that I wasn't going back to the office. I placed my little office bear which I had cleaned properly, and placed it inside his incubator. It smelled like me, so maybe he would not get so worked up while I was away.

* * *

I wanted to talk to Gemma some more and took a cab to her house, seeing my car was still at the Auto Shop. I knocked once and headed on in. The house smelled like it always did. Tobacco and bird. I loved Gemma's bird, but they gave this weird smell sometimes. Elvis, as I like to call him, because of his taste in music, squealed when he saw me.

"Hi there, Elvis." I said, petting his head, as Gemma walked into the kitchen.

"Wow. You look like crap." She said, not sugarcoating anything.

"Yeah, I kinda feel like crap too." I said honestly. Gemma sighed and grabbed a few beers from the fridge.

"You want to talk about it?" Gemma asked me and I only nodded.

"Your son called me earlier today. Said he wanted to talk to me, but I just told him that he should just leave me alone, and think about what he really wants." I told her, lighting up a smoke. "And now, I feel as if I was stupid enough to let him get away."

"Well, you know how my son is. He's not thinking clearly, but I'm sure that he'll make the right decision in the end. I am sure that he'll come running down your door, telling you how much he loves you. Because you and I both know, he has loved you since the day you were born." Gemma said, and I wanted to believe her.

"I really hope he does, Mama Gem." I said swallowing my tears. Gemma could sense my disturbance, and brought out a familiar box.

"Why do you have you box of guns out?" I asked her.

"Because there's something bothering me about Tara's need for a gun. Why would she hide a traceable gun in her purse?" Gemma answered with a question.

"Because she's stupid?" I said, hating the fact that Gemma was too caught up in Tara.

Gemma looked at me in warning, but she knew that the only reason I was on edge, was because of Jax.

"What do you say to me calling Luann, and we do some drinking and talk shit and give advice like we used to do when you were 18?" Gemma suggested and I couldn't agree more. I really needed a girl's night. And what better way than to spend it with the two most outrageous women I know in this world.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Clay arrived at Iron Hills not too long after Jax's conversation with Jury, and they all had a meeting on how they wanted things to go down from here on out. It was a fair deal, if Jax could say so himself.

"Next time this gavel slams down… will be the last for the Devil's Tribe." Clay told them all. "History between our clubs. Jury and John Teller, were in the same platoon in Nam. Needle's brother's a 20-year member of our Fresno charter. We have a deep respect for each other. Now… it's time to become brothers. I know some of you look forward to wearing the reaper. Others of you are afraid of it. That's a choice each man will have to make."

Jax walked forward with a brand new cut, putting on display for the others to see.

"From this point on, we're family. Indian Hills, Nevada charter, Sons of Anarchy. Congratulation. It is my personal hope that every one of you wears this cut. I know you got a lot to talk about. I'll leave you to your business." Clay said and the already patched members, walked out of the clubhouse. Jax could not see the look Happy was giving him, and he didn't know that he had talked to Sophie. Happy decided to wait and see how this all planned out before going all cave man on his VP.

Jax and Clay sat outside, waiting for the decision to be made.

"How do you think this thing will play out?" Jax asked Clay, taking another drag on his cigarette.

"Half, maybe more will stay. And that pack will thin out once the Mayans come a-knocking. Which should be real soon."

"We can't leave these guys with no backup. Vegas can hang." Jax suggested.

"Indian Hills is gonna have to learn how to protect their ground." Clay told him. "Best way to thin out a herd."

"Herd's already pretty thin, Clay. I want to be here for Jury when shit goes down." Jax said.

"I ain't worried about Jury. He can handle himself." Clay said at the same time as the door to the clubhouse opened, and members of Jury's men backed out, mumbling, and swearing under their breaths.

"Looks like the vote's in, huh?" Clay said with a huff, no idea how this was going to end. Jax didn't know himself, but followed Clay back inside the clubhouse where the rest was waiting. Jury looked at them as if he was still deciding what to do, but Jax knew the answer already.

"We're in." Jury said, gaining cheers from the others around. But the Sons didn't have time for that right now, and got down to business, handing over the new cut to their new members. Just then, the crowd went wild and everyone celebrated the new age.

With alcohol, weed and women.

"Patch over party!" Someone yelled, and Happy knew that this was the moment to talk to his VP, mostly because of his conversation with Sophie earlier, but he got distracted from all the nice ladies at the party, and he told himself that he would do it tomorrow.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I woke up early the next morning, surprisingly without a headache. But I wish I could say the same about Gemma and Luann. We had stayed up late, talking shit and given each other advice. Luann worked in the porn industry, and she had her fair share of stories and advice when it came to sex. I didn't feel the need to know more about sex, but let's face it, I was getting frustrated, and with Jax being away, I actually missed him and I wanted us to work this out. I wanted to do whatever it took to make things right again. I tiptoed out of the living room to go outside and take a cigarette and call Jax, just to tell him to come home to me when he returns to Charming.

It was no surprise that it went straight to voicemail. Maybe that was for the best, because I wasn't ready to hear his voice just yet.

 _"_ _Hey._

 _Uhm. I'm sorry for calling you this early. You're probably still asleep. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for the things I said to you on the phone yesterday. You didn't deserve to have me lashing out on you when all you wanted to do was to talk to me._

 _I understand that we have problems we need to talk about, and I hope that you'll come by my house when you get back. I don't want to sound like a fucking school girl, but I can't stop thinking about what you decide to do, all I know, is that I don't want to lose you, just because I love you, because I do. So, get your sweet ass back to Charming, and I'll make it worth it. I'll leave the door unlocked._

 _Bye."_

I hung up the phone and stomped my cigarette. Gemma and Luann still laid spread out on the floor and I knew they would be hungover when they finally woke up. So, I did the only thing I could think of, and started making breakfast for them. I made bacon and eggs, waffles and fresh pressed orange juice. I loved working in the kitchen, and deep down, I wanted to be a stay at home mom, and be a real housewife. Just not that desperate.

I could hear groans coming from the living room and I knew that the old bats of hell were about to wake up. I couldn't help myself, and decided to make it even worse for them. I grabbed a pot and a wooden spoon before going into the living room. I started banging the two items together, making a hell of a lot of noise.

"What the fuck, Sophie!" Luann yelled at the same time as Gemma.

"Wakey, wakey, eggs and bac-y!" I yelled still making 'music'.

"I will kill you with my bare hands!" Gemma growled, holding her head.

"I'm so sorry for the rude wakeup call, but breakfast is ready, and the coffee is freshly made." I said, trying to sound apologetic.

Gemma and Luann was thankful for me making them breakfast. It was still early and they really looked like shit, but we had things to do today.

Luann suddenly left the table because of a phone call, and I was alone with Gemma.

"I called Jax this morning." I said, taking a bite of bacon.

"No, shit." Gemma exclaimed. "What did my stupid son say?"

"He didn't answer, but I left a message on his phone for him to listen to when he wakes up." I answered with a sigh.

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him that I overreacted a little last night, and that I was willing to talk to him tonight when he comes home, and if he plays his cards right, I have some dirty lingerie waiting for him to be ripped off." I said with a smirk.

"Huh. I never thought that you where that kind of person, but I like it. I'm rooting for you to nail my son." Gemma said, and the only thing missing, was a high five.

"I really do hope my son doesn't screw things up with you, Sophie. I've been rooting for the two of you for almost 30 years. You're supposed to end up together." Gemma told me, and I loved it.

"By the way… I asked Luann for help, trying to figure out what Tara is hiding. I want to know if she's going to bring some shit into my town, dragging someone else down with her." Gemma said out of the blue.

"What? All this because she had a gun in her purse?" I asked suspiciously.

"After I dropped you off yesterday, I drove her home, and she told me she got it back in Chicago, that she lived in a rough neighborhood. And somehow, I just don't believe shit that comes out of her mouth." Gemma answered me.

"Has it ever occurred to you, that she may be telling the truth? Why insisting on her being dishonest." I asked, lighting up a cigarette.

"Because she's the biggest threat there is for you and Jax. She could destroy you, just like that." Gemma answered and I just shook my head, just as Luann came back.

"Hey, I gotta go. My guy finished his search, so I'll go over to him and see what he found." Luann said kissing both my cheek and Gemma's cheek.

I didn't want to admit that I wanted to know what Tara was hiding, because no matter how Jax feels about me, he feels something for Tara as well. I just don't know what she would've said if she knew that Jax lost his virginity with me. That no matter what, I'd like to believe we would always be special to one another.

"Let's get dressed and go to the Auto Shop. I bet that Tara's car is ready and we could be so sweet to deliver it to her." Gemma said, smiling widely.

Man… that woman is bat shit crazy. But I love her.

* * *

We drove into the yard, and it was already buzzing with life. As Gemma stopped the car, I noticed someone I haven't seen in a while. He was a dear friend of mine, but we haven't talked in some time. Gemma headed for the office and I walked over to the garage.

"Hey, Lowell." I said with a smile. Lowell was a sweet man, with serious problem. He had been battling with drug addiction for years But Lowell was always nice to me, and we've developed a friendship over the years.

"Hey, Sophie." Lowell said and I couldn't help but giving him a hug.

"How are you, how's Moby?" I asked, thinking about his son.

"We're good." Lowell told me, but I could tell that he was struggling. Before I could say anything else, Gemma joined us.

"Hey, Lowell? I need you to follow me in the tow truck back to Tara's place, her car is ready." Gemma told him and Lowell only nodded.

"Care to join me, sweetheart?" Gemma asked me, and I only nodded, knowing that I shouldn't let Gemma do this by herself. The woman was crazy enough to kill Tara without second thoughts about it.

"Do you mind if I talk to her alone?" Gemma asked me as we stopped outside Tara's house.

"Go right ahead. I wanted to talk some more with Lowell anyway." I answered, looking back at the tow truck pulling up next to us.

I jumped out of the car, and walked back to join Lowell.

"Aren't you joining Gemma?" He asked when I opened the door.

"No, I would rather catch up with you, if you don't mind." I answered with a smile, and Lowell actually looked relieved.

"So, Moby's doing good. He likes school and he really loved that gift you gave him for his birthday. He rides that bike everywhere." Lowell said, clearly proud of his son.

"That's great, Lowell. I'm glad to hear that." I said with a smile, knowing how hard it was for him, trying to raise his son.

"Yeah, and he likes to draw a lot. He don't see his mom too much, but hey, I'm real happy that Jax's kid's going to be okay. That's a blessing." Lowell said, and I found it sweet that he cared about that.

"Yeah, he's a true Teller at heart and I love his so much, that little boy has captured my heart. But what happened to Wendy should be a lesson for you, Lowell." I said sweetly.

"It is. I've been doing real good with my problems, Sophie, I promise you." Lowell told me and I knew that he was trying his best.

"I know, Lowell, I know." I said, reassuring him that I wasn't out to get him. "But know this: I consider you a friend and if you ever need it, a place to stay, someone to watch over Moby or if just need a break and need to get away getting some help, I'm your girl, okay?"

Lowell looked at him, and he didn't know what to say. He wasn't used to this, other than Clay giving him a break.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax woke up midday or something, his head was pounding from everything that happened yesterday. The first thought that dropped into his head, was Sophie and how whipped he had become, and on how much he wanted to go see her. He looked around the room only to find Susie in bed next to him, sleeping.

Jax stood up, trying to find his clothes, which was scattered all across the room. For some reason, his phone was under the bed. He saw he had a missed call and a voice message. Without checking the missed call, he listened to the message. His face fell as he finally heard her voice.

 _"_ _Hey._

 _Uhm. I'm sorry for calling you this early. You're probably still asleep. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for the things I said to you over the phone yesterday. You didn't deserve to have me lashing out on you when all you wanted to do was to talk to me._

 _I understand that we have problems we need to talk about, and I hope that you'll come by my house when you get back. I don't want to sound like a fucking school girl, but I can't stop thinking about what you decide to do, all I know, is that I don't want to lose you, just because I love you, because I do. So, get your sweet ass back to Charming, and I'll make it worth it. I'll leave the door unlocked._

 _Bye."_

"Shit!" Jax exclaimed under his breath as he sat down on the bed again. Jax Teller wasn't the kind of guy to feel bad about something he did, unless it involved Sophie Winston. She was his kryptonite and she could easily bring him down if she wished on it. He felt so stupid for how he acted last night, and he never wanted her to know of this hurt that he knew would come from this, if she ever found out about it.

Normally, being a part of this world, meant: What happens on a run, stays on a run. But somehow, it didn't reply to Sophie. Jax couldn't live with it.

He felt disgusted with himself, and walked out of the room without even looking at the woman in his bed. He needed some time to think by himself.

* * *

Jax grabbed his bag, and ignored everyone as he made his way out of the clubhouse. He got on his bike, to go see one of the places his father had talked about in his book. He wanted to see what it was all about.

 _"_ _The first time I read Emma Goldman wasn't in a book. I was 16, hiking near the Nevada border. The quote was painted on a wall in red. When I saw those words, it was like someone ripped them from the inside of my head."_

"Anarchism stands for liberation of the human mind… from the dominion of religion, liberation of the human body from the dominion of property, liberation from shackles… and the restraint of the government. It stands for social order…based on the free grouping of individuals." Jax read aloud.

He could understand why his old man would feel that way. After he started reading his words, he felt the same way.

Jax sat down, and he continued reading the script.

 _"_ _The concept was pure, simple, true. It inspired me, lit a rebellious fire. But ultimately, I learned the lesson that Goldman, Proudhon, and the others learned – that true freedom requires sacrifice and pain. Most human beings only think they want freedom. In truth, they yearn for the bondage of social order, rigid laws, materialism. The only freedom man really wants… is the freedom to be comfortable."_

Jax felt a chill going down his spine when he read those words. He understood that feeling his father described. Jax continued flipping the pages, when a photograph fell out from between the pages. He picked it up and it was a picture of Sophie and himself as kids. They were up at the cabin, and they had their arms wrapped around each other. Sophie was laughing but Jax was just looking down on her without her knowing.

He turned the picture and saw a message from his father.

 _"_ _Jackson. Don't be afraid to tell Sophie how much you love her."_

It was like John Teller knew how everything would turn out as they got older, and Jax promised himself that he would never be afraid to tell Sophie how he felt.

He just had to let her know.

On his way back, hours later, he saw something familiar at the gas station/Diner he and Bobby was at the day before. And it wasn't a good surprise. He knew those bikes everywhere, and he knew this would end badly.

He picked up his phone and called Clay.

 _"_ _Where the hell are you?"_

 _"_ _Yeah, looks like Jury's gonna have some backup when the Mayan shit goes down."_

 _"_ _What are you talking about?"_

 _"_ _I'm on my way back, and I'm not alone."_

Jax knew that Clay would handle things on his end, and now, he needed to do his part. He knocked over a few of the bikes before rushing over to his own. He waited for them to come out running, before he drove off down the road, managing to get them to follow him.

After the gun exchange outside the clubhouse, the SONS had the upper hand, and got away with only minor injuries.

Jury talked to the sheriff, making sure nothing would come back and bite them in the ass.

"Cleared his book debt. We're good." Jury told Jax and Clay. "What happens now? I'm probably going to lose a couple of more guys because of this."

"Well, there won't be another hit for a while. That pop off was just about dick size." Clay told him. "They want to let us know they're watching."

"Vegas will stick around for a while." Jax added, suddenly feeling anxious to get back home.

"Hey… I think I'll head back. I want to see the kid and my woman." Jax said, smirking as he did. "I'll ride with Happy and his crew."

Clay nodded and agreed, understanding why he wanted to go home. It was about time that he got his woman.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

After my talk with Lowell, I went over to the hospital, wanting to see Abel again. I needed to see his perfect face. Gemma kept on having secrets with Luann, and I decided that I didn't want to be a part of it, not right now, anyway.

This time, Rosie was here when I got there, and she smiled widely when she saw me.

"Hi, Sophie. How're you doing today?" Rosie asked me.

"I'm fine, now that I get to see this beautiful face." I said and Abel turned towards my voice again. Rosie couldn't help but smile.

"Why, thank you." Rosie said, with a playful grin. "I'll let you have some time alone with your boy here."

Rosie was on her way out of the room, before I stopped her.

"Rosie? Could you please stay? I could use some of your brilliant advice." I asked her. Rosie stood there for a few seconds, before she closed the door behind her, and sat down next to me.

"What's on your mind, sweetheart?" Rosie asked me, and I told her what I've been going through with Jax in the last few days.

Rosie listened to my troubles without interrupting me.

"So, I called him this morning, leaving him a message, saying that I wanted him to come over tonight. I want to work this out." I said, letting out a breath.

"Wow. Talk about complicated. And why would he freak out because you told him that you loved him? Men makes me clueless." Rosie said with an annoyed sigh.

"I don't really know what going through his head, I just know that I want to make it work, and that I'm sure I love him." I told her honestly.

"So, what are you doing here?" Rosie asked me, raising an eyebrow.

"What do you mean? I always come here to see Abel." I said.

"You should go home and get ready to see your man." Rosie told me and I knew she was right.

"Go, home, take a shower and put on that sexy lingerie, and promise me that you'll jump his bones when he comes over… if not, I will do it, and I'm sure that my husband won't mind." Rosie said and I couldn't' help but laugh, but I did as I was told. I kissed Abel's incubator and whispered that I loved him, and walked out of the NICU quickly. Rosie was right, it was time to get my man.

I had the biggest smile on my face, and I hoped that when I saw Jax, he would tell me that he loves me. But that's not important, I just want to be with him.

* * *

As I walked out of the hospital, I ran into Gemma. She was here to see her grandson.

"Hey, sweetheart. Where are you going in a hurry?" Gemma asked me, wondering why I wasn't with Abel.

"I am going home to get ready." I said with a smirk, and I knew that Gemma understood.

"It's about damn time!" Gemma exclaimed, crossing her arms over her chest. "Just promise me one thing, Sophie."

"And what's that, Mama Gem?" I asked, but she didn't answer right away. She opened the trunk of her car and took out a bag from CaraCara. Luann's porn studio.

"Somehow I doubt that you have anything sexy to wear." Gemma said, and I didn't even want to know what kind of things Luann and Gemma had packed for me, so I took the bag quickly.

"Don't let it be almost 15 years until you sleep with him again." Gemma said, mocking her in the process. I only laughed at her, and gave her a hug. "Go, get your man, sweetheart."

I nodded and smiled before I hauled a cab to take me back to my place.

I was mostly nervous on my way home, but deep in my heart, I knew that it was no point for me to be that way. This is how it's supposed to be. This is how Jax and I was supposed to end up.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax sighed when he finally drove his bike into the hospital's parking lot, feeling relieved that he was finally back where he belonged. He removed his helmet and hoped that Sophie was still here, reading for his son, and that they could talk this shit out. He walked tiredly, but happy towards the NICU, bumping into Tara on the way.

"Hey." He said with his trademark grin.

"Hey." Tara replied, glad to see that he was back to see his son.

"How's he doing?" Jax asked her.

"Fine. Your mom's in there." Tara answered.

"Where else would she be?" Jax said amused, but then he got all nervous for some reason. "And what about Sophie, is she here?"

"She was here a little while ago, but she left before your mother arrived." Tara told him.

"How's Nevada?"

"Uneventful." Jax answered and he meant it. He smiled at Tara before he walked into Abel's room, finding his mother sitting in the rocking chair Sophie always uses when she's here.

"Hey." Jax greeted in a whisper, not wanting to disturb Abel.

"You okay?" Gemma asked her son.

"I'm fine."

"I think maybe someone could've called. I've been sitting here…" Gemma started to say, but Jax cut her off with a kiss on the cheek. He walked over to the incubator, seeing the bear in there with him. Jax remember giving that bear to her when she started her company. It was nice of her to give it to Abel.

"Sophie placed it there earlier. Rosie told me that Abel gets worked up sometimes, but the smell and voice of Sophie, calms him down." Gemma explained to him.

Jax got that goofy grin again, and it didn't go unnoticed by his mother.

"What? What's with that stupid grin of yours?" She asked her son. Jax hunched down next to his mother.

"I am going to tell Sophie that I love her, and that there's no fucking chance that I'll ever letting her go again." Jax said like a teenager, and Gemma couldn't help but break into a smile.

"Then why don't you go tell her that? I'll stay with the kid." Gemma offered. Jax looked up at his sleeping son.

"Go! He'll be fine." Gemma urged on, and Jax made up his mind. He kissed his mother's forehead and practically ran out the room.

Gemma couldn't help but roll her eyes at this whole situation.

"Your parents are a pair of weirdos, Abel. You might as well get used to it sooner rather than later." Gemma told her grandson.

"It's about damn time."

* * *

Jax rode his bike through the familiar streets towards Sophie's house. He was actually sweating like a pig, and Jax Teller doesn't sweat. According to Sophie's voice mail, she would keep the door unlocked for him, so it was just for him to walk through the door. Stopping in her driveway, most of the house was dark, the only thing shining through the windows, was the fireplace in the living room.

He took off his helmet and took a deep breath. This was it. He was finally going to tell Sophie how much he loves her and that one day, she would become his future wife and mother of his children.

Jax opened the door, half expecting her to stand there in the hallway, waiting for him. When she wasn't, he started calling for her.

"Sophie? Are you here, darling?" Jax asked, but still no answer. Cautiously, he walked towards the living room, gun at the ready, thinking that something might have happened to her. He found her sitting on the couch, starring into the fire.

"Shit, Sophie! When you didn't answer me, I expected the worst." Jax exhaled, placing his gun on her coffee table.

He could tell she was distraught about something, and she fiddle with an envelope.

"Sophie?" Jax asked carefully.

"Did you have a good time in Iron Hills?" Sophie asked, not taking her eyes off the fireplace.

"It was all right, I guess. Uneventful." Jax answered with a shrug. "But I got some time to think, and I realized that I didn't need to think about it. I knew it all along."

"Yeah?" Sophie asked hesitantly.

"Yes." Jax said, grabbing her chin, gently forcing her to look at him.

"I love you, Sophie. I've always loved you." Jax told her, and he thought that the tears in her eyes, where tears of joy.

What he didn't expect, was her hand connecting with his face hard and fast. In the midst of it all, Jax was shocked by her actions.

"Fuck you, Jax Teller!" She yelled at the top of her lungs. "Fuck you, for making me love you, when I know that I can't trust a word coming out of your mouth."

Jax still didn't understand her reaction.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Jax asked, getting up from the couch. She took the envelope, shoving it hard into his chest.

"Uneventful, my ass, Jackson! But I guess what happens on a run, stays on a run." Sophie said angrily, but mostly sad. "Get the fuck out of my house, and my life."

Sophie ran away from him and locked herself in her bedroom, shutting him out completely.

With trembling hands, he opened the envelope addressed with only Sophie name, no address. The content of the envelope made him curse loudly. Apparently, someone had taken pictures of him doing Susie up in Nevada, dated and timed, and everything. On top of the picture it said:

 _"_ _Doesn't feel so good, does it? Knowing that your boyfriend doesn't love you."_

 ** _2.23 AM, last night_**

"Fuck!" Jax yelled, throwing the picture away. He walked to her bedroom door, trying to open it, but to no surprise, finding it locked.

"Sophie, babe? Please open the door. I'm so sorry. Please, baby." Jax pleaded through the door. But Sophie Winston was in no condition to talk to him, she sat with her back towards the bedroom door, trying to block out his pleading voice. She never thought she would experience this kind of pain.

Maybe she was overreacting, but this was her pain, and she dealt with it in her own way.

Jax Teller, had once again, chosen to break her heart.

* * *

 **Please don't kill me! I've already said that their relationship won't be easy. And I like to think of their relationship like "One step forward, then Jax running the other way, when things get hard."**

 **I promise you I will make it better again, but not just right now.**

 **And I know that Sophie may be overreacting, but she was already so unsure of herself, and the fact that Jax blew her off. In her head, she thinks she not good enough. But she will become a stronger person as the story goes on.**

 **Please let me know what you think.**

 **Until next time xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***peace486: Thank you! Here's the update. sorry to say that Jax and Sophie are going through a rough time right now.**

 ***SOAROCKS: aaawe! thank you! I hope you still are!**

 ***Foreverkee: He certainly left her hanging and then some. It will only get complicated from here.**

 ***Emmettluver2010: I have something up my sleeve about Sophie's love life. I promise. And when it comes to her mother, of course they will run into each other at some point ;)**

 ***TwilightNewMoonEclipseMidnight: How did you like that response?**

 ***Sabrina: Hi! and thank you so much! I agree with you, I like the 3 first season best as well. I am not sure how long I will follow the story, I just know how I want it to end...**

 ***india-guest: Thank you!**

 ***tanayastewart92: Sorry for the delay!**


	8. One Step at a Time

**I'm back with the next chapter of this story!**

 **It didn't take that long, because I was inspired to write it. And that's thanks to those of you who reviewed, read and added this story as their favorite, or a story worth to follow.**

 **I had a lot of fun writing this chapter, and I hope you'll enjoy this as well. I've been having a hard time lately, and writing helps. So let's see where Jax and Sophie's journey takes them to next!**

 **Please give me your thoughts. They are highly** **appreciated!**

 _ **Disclaimer: I do not own "Sons of Anarchy" only my OC**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

You know that feeling, when you want a guy to stick around and want to spend time with them, they never are, but the moment you tell them to get the fuck out of your life, they won't stop bothering you.

That's how I feel, right about now. After crying my eyes out for what felt like hours, I finally got around to actually do something else. Jax never left and sat on the other side of the door, but he had dozed off after apologizing his ass off. I never opened the door, because I couldn't look at him. I packed a bag, not wanting to stay here if Jax wouldn't leave, and as the coward that I am, I jumped out of my window, and made my way over to my brother and Donna.

It was 2 in the morning, when I knocked on their door, hating myself for coming here this late. Luckily, it was my brother opening the door.

"Soph? What's going on?" Opie said, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"Can I stay here for a little while?" I asked, rearranging the bag on my shoulder.

"Yeah, sure." Opie said, moving out of the way, so I could step inside. Opie helped me set the couch up for me to sleep on, and what I loved about my brother, is the fact that he didn't ask any questions, even though I was still crying.

"Are you all set?" Opie asked me, and I just nodded. Opie knew me well enough to ask, but understood it would have something to do with Jax. He gave me a hug, telling me that everything would work out in the end. I didn't want to let him go, and buried my head into his chest, and he just held me. I hated crying over that stupid idiot. I knew it wasn't worth it, at the same time as I knew that it was worth everything.

I laid on the couch, just staring up at the roof, not getting an ounce of sleep. Then I heard small feet tapping against the floor, and Ellie and Kenny came into the living room.

"Hey, rugrats. What are you doing up?" I asked in a whisper. Not wanting to wake the whole house.

"We heard you talking to daddy." Ellie whispered back. "And we heard you crying. My mom always stays in our room when we're sad. Do you want to stay with us?"

Oh, how I loved my niece and nephew. They truly were the apple of my eye.

"I would love too." I said with a smile, and grabbed their hands. We walked together back to their room, and I shared the bed with them both. We curled up on Kenny's bed and I loved the fact that they played with my hair until we fell asleep.

* * *

That was a few days ago. I had been laying low at my brother's house since that night, and Jax won't leave me alone. Every day, a fresh set of roses is lined up outside the door, and at work. He tried calling me several times and trying to communicate through Opie, but I didn't want to know. He broke my heart, and I needed to let the wounds heal. Opie tried to get me to talk to him, but I was stubborn, and refused. I did visit the hospital though. Nothing could stop me from seeing that little boy, I just made Gemma text me when Jax wasn't there.

I felt myself leaning towards forgiving him, though. I miss him so much, but I want him to work for it. But I am afraid that my willpower will betray me, the next time I lay my eyes on him.

The next fundraiser was just around the corner, which occupied me most of the time. I wanted this to go smoothly, because I wanted to help Gemma, and the ones that needed it the most.

I just arrived back at Donna and Opie's house with the kids, when I heard voices from the backyard. I figured it was just my brother and my best friend, and entered the backyard.

I stopped dead in my tracks. There, by the shed, I saw my brother and the one person in this world I didn't want to see right now. And shirtless at that. They were taking things out of the shed, trying to get to something.

"How did you get this thing in here?" Opie asked his wife. They didn't see me standing there yet.

"By myself." Donna answered and I saw Jax trying to get the old crib out.

"How much?" Jax asked, and flashed that Teller smile of his.

"Aw, forget it. It's a gift." Opie said quickly, taking the crib with him. I watched as Jax gave Donna the money anyway, and it made me swoon even more. Why did he have to be so adorable? I was supposed to be mad at him.

"All right, see you at the fundraiser." Jax told them, still not aware of me standing by the door, hiding like a coward.

"That 'Taste of Charming' thing Sophie has told me about?" Donna asked, already knowing that I was there.

"Yeah… Sophie asked me to do the fireworks." Opie answered, as if Donna didn't already know about it.

"My mom started it years ago, with Sophie. It raises money for the school district, and for the children in need." Jax added.

"We'll be there." Opie agreed.

"Honestly man, I'm doing this more for your sister, for just a chance to make it up to her." Jax said.

"You really screwed up in that department." Opie said as he shook his head. "You better fix it."

"That's the plan." Jax told him and started to walk away. I really wanted to talk to him, and grabbed the first thing I could find, only to have a reason to talk to him.

"Jax!" I called, following him to his car. When he saw me, his whole posture changed and he broke into the biggest smile ever. I suddenly got nervous and felt like a teenager again.

"I uh… I just wanted to give you the schedule for the fundraiser tomorrow." I said with a blush. Jax couldn't help but grin, but grabbed it and purposely brushed his fingers against mine. And it made my senses go wild.

We just stood there, not knowing what to do. It somehow felt awkward. The last time I saw him, I was so angry and hurt for what he did, and it made me insecure.

"Well, see you later." I said in a rush, retreating to the house.

"Hey, Sophie!" Jax called, and it made me turn around quickly.

"You don't need to make up excuses to talk to me. My mom already gave me this yesterday." Jax said with a grin. "I love you, bye."

I didn't know what to respond, and just walked into the house again. I needed to get ready to meet Gemma anyway. Donna stood by the kitchen, and had seen it all. She burst into a fit of laughter.  
"Smooth." She said sarcastically. "It feels as if we're back in high school."

"Shut up, Donna." I exclaimed throwing the towel at her. I walked into the bathroom to take a shower before meeting Gemma. I was looking forward to this thing and I've decided that it would be so much fun.

* * *

I put on my skinny jeans, black tank top, black leather stilettos, leather jacket and my priceless rayban sunglasses. I grabbed my keys, and kissed the children goodbye.

"So, I'll see you guys later today, right?" I asked, ruffling their hair.

"Sure, Aunt Sophie." Ellie and Kenny said, not really taking their eyes off the TV. I fought the urge to roll my eyes and turned to Donna.

"Later." I said with a grin, before walking out the door.

I parked my car outside the school, and I saw the fair already buzzing with life. People here, was busy making their stands ready to sell their products and other things. And everything went to the children. My company, had a stand of our own. We were selling Mama Gem's famous chili, and other kinds of food, which meant that I had to make my famous potato salad, or Bobby would kill me.

"Hey, Mama." I said, putting my purse down behind the counter.

"Hey, sweetheart. Wow, you look nice. Someone you're trying to impress?" Gemma asked, kissing my cheek, which turned red in an instant.

"Nah… I just felt like dressing up today. Is that a crime?" I asked, starting to set up for where we would be cooking the food tomorrow.

"You're not fooling anyone." Luann said as she came up to our booth.

"Hey, Luann. How's business?" I asked her.

"Oh, you know… Couldn't be better." Luann said with a smile.

"So, how are things with my son, after he couldn't keep his dick in his pants up in Nevada." Gemma said, and I couldn't help but groan. Thanks for reminding me.

"Well. I don't know what to say, really. I've been laying low at Opie's house for a few days, because I knew that Jax wouldn't leave me alone at home. But that didn't stop him from sending me flowers every day, and telling me how much he loves me. I have a hard time believing him, you know." I told her and both Gemma and Luann looked at me with pity and boredom.

"Honey. What's done is done. He can't do anything about what he did. It's up to you if you want to take him back. If I were you, I would let him sweat for a while, then, you really have him by the balls." Luann said, and it made Gemma glare at her best friend. One thing you should know about Luann, is that she'll tell you everything as it is. I don't think I've ever heard her sugarcoating it when I was a kid. She spoke the truth, and she wasn't afraid to let me know that.

Gemma wanted to say something, but let it go, so she wouldn't say something she was going to regret.

Luann decided to come over to my place tonight to help with the cooking, because it was a lot of chopping, and I needed all the help I could get.

"Tell everyone to leave room for the busses." Gemma said, as she made sure that everything was in its place.

"Who are we bussing?" Luann asked because I couldn't after Luann telling me some story about something that happened on set.

"Oakdale assisted living. Seniors are always compulsive gamblers. Triples our raffle dollars." Gemma said with a smile. "God bless Social Security."

"Gemma." We heard a voice say, and it went cold down my spine. I knew that way more than I would love to.

"Oh, hey, April. Appreciate you coming to help." Gemma said, knowing that things were a little tense between us, and that's putting it mildly.

"Can I ask you something?" April asked, trying to ignore that fact that I was standing right there.

"What?" Gemma asked.

"Charlie's band's playing during the fireworks tomorrow night. He really wants his dad to come." April told us.

"Oh, shit, April. I don't think Clay is going to go for it." Gemma said, and I couldn't agree more. I didn't feel like seeing the man that left my brother to rot in prison for 5 years.

"Oh, I wouldn't ask anything like this. Me and you, we understand what went down. But my kids… Charlie doesn't know. It breaks his heart that his dad can't come to anything around here. Not baseball games, no school stuff." April messed on.

"You know what, April. I'll bring it up to Clay." I said, not letting Gemma have this on her shoulders.

"Well, you of all people would owe me this, don't you think?" April practically hissed back at me, making Gemma see red.

"Hey! If you really want this shit to happen, I would think twice about how you threat my little girl, you got that?" Gemma said in warning. I love that woman.

April nodded, understanding that she had to play her cards right.

"She told you that she would talk to Clay, but that we won't promise you anything. He's a stubborn man." Gemma said, and April backed off as soon as possible.

Gemma looked at me, knowing what happened back then.

"Are you sure you want him here, you and I both know what happened back then, but Clay and the others don't. Not even Jax." Gemma said. I knew what she was talking about. The only one ever knowing about what happened years ago, was me, Gemma and Luann. And it surprised me that they hadn't told anyone, and no one ever figured it out.

I was glad they didn't, though I know I should tell Jax at some point, but not now. It's too dangerous. For Kyle, for me, for Jax. For the relationship, I hope we would have down the line.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

The sound of an alarm in prison, pierced through the hallways as Otto Delaney and two other inmates ran toward the sound of someone in the need of help. And that came from the toilet.

"Somebody help me, please! I don't know, I swear! Somebody help me, please! Please!" Chuck Marstein screamed, as he was beaten by two Chinese inmates. Otto and his men, tackled the two, getting them away from Chuck, who was laying on the floor, bleeding. Otto punched one of them, before his men took them away, to give them even more beatings.

"Lin will get him when he gets out. Sam Crow can't protect his ass forever." One of the men said as they were dragged away.

"You okay?" Otto asked him.

"Yes. Thanks, Otto." Chuck said, managing to get onto his feet quick enough to sit down on one of the toilets. "Those guys don't give up, huh?"

"They never will, Chucky." Otto said with a chuckle.

"I'm out of here tomorrow."

"Don't worry, I'm setting it up." Otto told him.

"You're a good friend, Otto." Chuck said, before reaching into his pants, starting to jerk off. Otto started at him for a moment, before shaking his head.

"Not that good a friend." Otto said, before leaving him to it. Sure, he missed the sex, but he would never ever swing that way. Now, he just had to wait until Jax and Clay came to visit him, and tell them what's going on.

* * *

Just an hour later, Jax and Clay came to see him, and Otto told them everything.

"Thanks for bringing this to the club. They guys send their best." Jax told him.

"It's good, man." Otto replied, glad to help the club out.

"So, who else is looking to meet with your friend?" Clay asked.

"He's got a couple of buddies in Chinatown. They'd love to find him. Show him a good time." Otto answered.

"If we pick him up, show him a good time first, how grateful is Chuck?" Jax asked, not knowing what to think of him.

"Probably bake you two honey cakes." Ottp told him.

"You trust him?" Clay asked him.

"Been watching his back for 18 months. Know him pretty good. I trust him." Otto said truthfully.

"All right, we'll show him around." Clay said, meaning every word.

"Good. You make sure my gratitude goes to Luann." Otto demanded and Clay wouldn't have it any other way.

"Absolutely." Jax declared for him.

"Listen Chuck. He's got a couple of issues. It's a nervous tic kind of a thing." Otto told them so they wouldn't be surprised by his problem.

"Tics we can deal with." Clay said and left.

"No doubt. Hey, Jax!" Otto called, motioning for him to stay behind for a couple of minutes.

"How's it going with Sophie?" Otto asked, missing Samcrow's little Princess.

"I'm working on her, Otto. Kind of broke her heart a little." Jax said, feeling guilty.

"You idiot! You better fix that, Jax. Or I'm breaking out of here, hunt you down, and fuck you up completely." Otto warned him, an Jax knew what he was capable of.

"I promise, okay? I'm never gonna hurt Sophie Winston again." Jax swore, but Otto didn't really believe him.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

After finishing with the preparations for tomorrow, Luann told me that she would meet me at home in about two hours or so. She's a keeper that one. But first, I needed to talk to Clay about Kyle. I didn't want him there, and I only did this because of his kids, not for him.

I followed Gemma back to the Clubhouse, and wait for Clay to come back. It didn't hurt to see Jax either, even though I still didn't trust him. Gemma handed me a coffee, at the same time as Clay and Jax rode their bikes into the parking lot. Jax smile grew even wider, when he saw me standing there. He didn't know if he should walk over to me, made him all nervous. Hah! So funny. Gemma noticed and told me to go talk to Jax about it, and she would deal with Clay. I smiled and walked over to Jax.

"Hey. I'm heading out to see the kid, do you want to join me?" Jax asked, knowing that I wouldn't pass an opportunity to see Abel.

"Yeah, I would love to." I answered, making Jax smile widely. "I have to take my own car, thought. I'm meeting Luann in two hours, and she's helping me making my potato salad for tomorrow. But I have to talk to you first."

Jax turned and looked at me, with those beautiful blue eyes, almost making me forget what I wanted to say.

"Uhm… April came over to the fair today. She told me that her son was playing tomorrow, and she wanted Kyle to come." I said in a rush. "I just want you guys to think about it. I can't stand the man, not after what he did to Opie. But I want you to consider this for his kids. They don't understand why their father can't be there."

Jax looked at me, knowing that it wasn't easy for me to even ask this of him.

"Sophie. You know as well as I do, that this isn't a good idea." Jax started to say.

"I know, trust me, I know. But think about the kids, you understand, right? Being a father and all." That's right. I played the 'Abel' card, knowing that Jax wouldn't be able to resist.

"That's kinda mean, Sophie. But I guess I deserve it." Jax said, reminding me why we weren't together.

"Thank you. Just talk to Clay, all right?" I said, before getting into my car. I arrived at the hospital only minutes later, with Jax following right behind. I didn't even wait for him and walked into the hospital, wanting to see Abel.

"Hi, baby." I said, touching the incubator. Abel turned his head towards me, letting me know that he knew that I was here.

"He already loves you." I heard Jax say from behind me.

"Yeah? I kinda like him too." I said, turning around, smiling at him. Jax just stood there smiling at me. I could tell he wanted nothing more than to take me in his arms and forget everything he did, but the silence between us, was a painful reminder that nothing was okay between us.

"I brought a book. Maybe we could do some reading?" Jax said, clearing his throat. I only nodded, and brought up another chair for him to sit on. I sat next to him, listening to him telling the story about "The Velveteen Rabbit."

Jax made himself comfortable, and started reading. I listened intently, because I loved this book, and I loved the words written.

As Jax read, my focus was only on Abel. I almost jumped out of the chair, when I felt his fingers traced my hand. He didn't look up from the book, but continued to caress the palm of my hand. My heart was beating out of control, and it took some time to get used to the fact that I let him touch me.

 ** _"_** ** _The Skin Horse had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so old that his brown coat was bald in patches and showed the seams underneath, and most of the hairs in his tail had been pulled out to string bead necklaces. He was wise, for he had seen a long succession of mechanical toys arrive to boast and swagger, and by-and-by break their mainsprings and pass away, and he knew that they were only toys, and would never turn into anything else. For nursery magic is very strange and wonderful, and only those playthings that are old and wise and experienced like the Skin Horse understand all about it._**

 _ **"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"**_

 _ **"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."**_

 _ **"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.**_

 _ **"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."**_

 _ **"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"**_

 _ **"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."**_

 _ **"I suppose you are real?" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive. But the Skin Horse only smiled.**_

 _ **"The Boy's Uncle made me Real," he said. "That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always."**_

 _ **(Margery Williams Bianco – The Velveteen Rabbit)**_

* * *

"I'm sorry, little man. I'm not as good as Grandma." Jax said suddenly, and I couldn't help but smile at his modesty.

"You're doing much better than you give yourself credit for." I whispered, hoping that he would understand the hidden meaning behind my words. Jax looked at me, and his smile made me want to forget everything that happened. Jax was leaning towards me, and I was about to let him kiss me, when something on the outside caught my attention.

"Jax…" I whispered, breaking the tension between us.

"I know. You're not ready to forgive me yet." Jax said in defeat.

"No, it's not that." I said. "There's a creepy guy standing outside, and he's staring at us, at Abel."

Jax turned around to see the man I was referring to.

"Wait here." Jax told me, but he knew I would follow him anyway.

"Can I help you?" Jax asked suspiciously.

"That's a beautiful boy." The man said, but I still got a bad vibe from the guy.

"Thanks." Jax said, waiting for him to say something more. He didn't but just walked away. Something wasn't right with that guy, and I had a feeling this wasn't the last I would see of him.

"Hey... I'm sorry, but I need to get going. Luann is coming by the house soon." I told him, getting my purse.

"Yeah. If you gotta go, you gotta go." Jax said, but he didn't want me to leave.

"I'll see you tomorrow, I guess." I said, and it was all so awkward. We were so close to crossing that line that would make me forgive him completely, but somewhere in my mind, I knew that I wasn't ready for that just yet.

I drove my car back home, at the same time as Luann stopped down the street.

"Hey baby." She said, taking out a bottle of tequila. "Are you ready for some bakin'?"

I couldn't help but laugh at her.

"I am more than ready. Jax gave me a letter to you from Otto, by the way. Jax told me that he really misses you." I told her, knowing how hard it was for the two of them to be apart.

"Thanks, Sophie." Luann said with a sad smile. It was nice spending some time alone with Luann. She was a good friend, and she was an expert to make you feel better, and talk shit, just to get a smile on your face.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

 _Earlier that day._

Clay jumped off his bike and saw Sophie walk over to Jax, and for once, he hoped that she wouldn't slap him or start a fight. He looked up and saw his wife coming towards him.

"Hey baby. All set for your picnic?" Clay asked her.

"It's a fund-raiser." Gemma corrected him.

"Who we raising funds for this year?" Clay asked.

"Music department, middle school." Gemma answered, and feeling proud of it.

"You are a saint." Clay said sarcastically.

"Don't be an asshole." Gemma shot back at him, knowing that her husband really didn't care.

"I'm serious." Clay argued.

"Yeah, I can tell. Sophie and I was talking to April Hobart. What do you think about letting Kyle come tomorrow?" Gemma asked, jumping right into it.

"I don't think about it. Opie went to prison because of that asshole. He's excommunicated." Clay said, and he really didn't need to think about it.

"It's not for Kyle. April stayed in Charming when you stripped his patch. Divorced him." Gemma argued back.

"She divorced him 'cause he was nailing everything with two sets of lips. The answer is no." Clay said, not knowing who he really was nailing all those years ago.

"His kid's band is playing tomorrow night. His father has never seen him play. It's for April's kids." Gemma told him. "I guess I was just feeling charitable. Thought maybe you'd like the opportunity to do the same thing."

"I'm very charitable." Clay said as Gemma started to walk away.

"I know, darling."

"You know what, I'll put it up for a vote. But it's not going to pass." Clay yelled after her, and Gemma knew that she had won.

"I love you." She called out to him.

"That love's going to kill me." Clay mumbled under his breath, as he started working on the bike in front of him, needing something else to think about.

* * *

A little while later, Clay summoned the Sons to Church, letting them know about the deal him and Jax made with Otto.

"Chuck's been cooking the books for the Asian mob. Skimmed 400 K off of Henry Lin's crew." Clay told them, gaining some respect from the other Sons. "Otto kept him safe up at Stockton, but he gets out tomorrow morning. So, we protect him, we pick up the cash, we get him out of Cali.

"We're going to split the cash with Chucky boy. 25 percent goes to us, Otto wants his 25 to go to Luann." Jax said.

"It ain't gonna be a cakewalk. Lin's a dangerous cat. Sneaky little bastard." Bobby said, not quite sure if they should do this.

"That's why we're going to work three-man shifts. We're gonna keep this place locked down. Chuck never leaves the clubhouse. And the garage is open for pick-ups only." Clay informed them about how to do this.

"Skim's hidden in one of the restaurants Lin uses as a front. We're going to keep Chuck here until Sunday. Go pick up the money when the place is closed." Jax butted in.

"Good, good." Tig agreed, and the Sons was about to leave the meeting, when Clay stopped them.

"Wait a minute, wait a minute. There's one more thing." Clay said, and Jax knew what was coming.

"April Hobart came to Sophie and Gemma today, wants to know if her old man can come to the fund-raiser, see his kid's band play." Clay said, and everyone looked at Opie.

"That's done, brother. That's done." Tig said, not wanting this to happen.

No, I know, but You know, she took a big hit staying behind. She supported the club. It's for her, not Kyle. I figured I'd throw it up for a vote." Clay said, knowing this would go wrong.

"Let him come." Opie said, surprising everyone.

"Are you serious? This can't be about getting even. Not at the school." Clay warned him.

"It's not about that. The guy's got nothing, right? No club, no family." Opie said. "Do me good to see that. Appreciate what I got."

"Anybody opposed?" Clay asked.

"I don't agree with it." Piney said, knowing how broken Sophie was, when Opie was sent to prison. Kyle was a huge part in hurting his little Princess.

"This is wrong, man." Tig shot in.

"Majority rule. Vote passes. Let him come." Clay told them, gaining grunts from some of the Sons. You all better be at that fund-raiser tomorrow, unless you want two pairs of high heel boots up your ass." Clay warned them, knowing that not only would Gemma be pissed, but also, Sophie. And he didn't know who to fear most.

"You coming?" Bobby asked about the pickup tomorrow.

"I'd rather have my balls cut off." Clay said, trying to be funny, only to get a groan from his bikers.

"What, too soon for that joke?" Clay asked with a laugh. He stopped Jax, wanting to run something by him.

"Watch Kyle tomorrow, right? I don't want anything going down at Gemma's gig. Keep him away from Ope, and his sister. I have never seen her so angry as I did when we threw Kyle out of the club. She was livid.

"All right." Jax assured him, because he didn't want this fundraiser to go bad.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I woke up early that morning, with a slight headache, thanks to Luann's truth and Tequila, where we talked about what dicks our men was and how much we missed them, and how we could never live without them.

But my headache was gone by the time I got out of the shower. I needed to be by the fair before noon, and hoped that it wouldn't take too long before the Sons came to help. I drove over there, all dressed up in a nice pair of ripped up skinny jeans, a white singlet, my beloved leather jacket, and the same heels as yesterday. Not too showy, but not too conservative. People knew that it's the style I rock.

Gemma was waiting for me by her own car, to show me where to park, so the busses could have their room.

"Good morning, Sophie. Did you bring your potato salad?" Gemma asked, kissing my cheek.

"Yes. I did bring it. I just hope it's enough." I said, knowing I say the same every year.

"You know it's enough." Gemma argued, and summoned some help for getting it to our booth.

The day started good. The senior arrived just in time for lunch, and they were hungry. About the same time as Bobby finally showed up, I got a text from Donna, telling me that they're arriving soon, and I wanted to go and meet them.

I walked towards the parking lot, seeing Opie's truck coming to a stop. I could see Ellie and Kenny sitting there, waiting for their parents to open the door, so they could get out.

"Aunt Sophie!" Both of them yelled at the same time, running over to me.

"Oh, my precious Ellie elephant and Kenny Kangaroo!" I exclaimed, embracing them as if I haven't seen them in years.

"Hey Ope…" I said, giving my big brother a hug.

"Sophie." Opie replied, hugging me back. "I have to say… I did not miss waking up to your pale face this morning."

I playfully punched him on the arm.

"Yeah, I love you too, brother." I said sarcastically, as Donna joined us.

"Hey… Isn't that guy Samcro?" Donna asked, making both Opie and myself to turn. And there he was. Kyle Hobart, and it made my insides twist, and not in a good way.

"Not anymore." Opie answered, looking at Kyle intently.

"He got out?" Donna asked.

"Sort of. Why don't you take the kids and go with Sophie? I'll catch up." Opie told her, and even though I wanted to stay and kick Kyle's ass, my niece and nephew meant more to me.

"Okay, let's go, kids." I ushered them along.

"Aunt Sophie, is it true that you have pony rides here?" Ellie asked excited.

"Well, it's not exactly a pony ride, but you get to cuddle them, and feed them. These ponies work so much as it is, so we keep them here so people can brush them and take care of them, because they need it." I told both Ellie and Kenny. They looked a little disappointed, but they seemed to understand why they needed some time off as well. People could buy carrots and apples for them, which meant more equipment for the kids. I looked back and saw Jax waiting for Kyle. This could not be good. I turned towards Donna, who seemed to get the picture.

"Go." Donna said, and I only nodded. I walked as fast as I could, trying not to draw too much attention.

"Jax, what are you doing?" I asked harshly, but I couldn't stop the next thing from happening. Kyle was heading our way and this would not end well. I watched as Kyle turned to his girlfriend.

"Give us a minute, baby, all right?" Kyle said to her, and she obeyed. Jax stood in front of me, as if he needed to protect me from Kyle.

"No need to say anything. I know my boundaries." Kyle said, trying to be humble.

"I'm gonna tell you anyway." Jax said, showing his authority. "You stay away from everyone. The kid's done playing, you and your teenager climb in your pretty little cage and drive away."

Jax wrapped his arm around my waist protectively, trying to guide me away.

"Jax, wait." Kyle called out, and I swear I was about to shit my pants. What if Kyle decided to tell Jax what happened between us back then?

"I have something for the club. This thing fell into my lap, man. I'm making stupid money funneling stolen parts at my gig over at Sparks Brothers. I want to hook you guys up." Kyle said and Jax lost his temper, and slammed him up against the wall.

"Jax!" I exclaimed but he didn't care that I was there.

"That's why you're here? You're trying to buy us back? Pull us into one of your bullshit schemes?" Jax hissed dangerously.

"Not bullshit, okay? I want to share this with you guys." Kyle said quickly.

"Jax, stop it, please! Don't do this to Gemma." I pleaded, and that made Jax look up and see his mother. He slowly let go of Kyle, but that didn't make him any less intimidating.

"Get out of my sight." Jax warned before turning to me. "Are you coming?"

Yeah, in just a sec." I answered, looking back at Kyle. Jax didn't want me to be left alone with him, but he thought he understood why I did, so he walked away.

"It's nice to see you again, angel…" Kyle started to say, but I slapped the hell out of him.

"What the FUCK is your problem, Kyle?! And don't ever call me that again!" I hissed, trying to not draw attention to myself.

"Why? Are you afraid that your precious Jax will find out that you're the only one that broke up my marriage? That you're the only one I was hooking up with for 3 years!" Kyle hissed back at me.

"That part is way behind me, jackass!" I told him.

"I stopped caring for you the second you screwed my brother over! You were nothing but a dark part of my life!" I spat back at him.

"Keep telling yourself that. But I was ready to leave my wife and kids for you, and we were gonna leave this town. I messed up once, and you turned your back on me, just like that." Kyle argued, and it made me see red.

"That mess up, was my own brother. You ran, and if you ever loved me, you would've stayed. So, fuck you, Kyle!" I said under my breath, and walked away from him, hoping that no one would question the conversation we just shared.

* * *

I walked around the fair, loving that everyone was having a good time. I saw Unser standing there in his booth, selling other kinds of food.

"Hey, Unser." I said with a sigh.

"Hey, Princess. How are you?" Unser replied.

"I could've been better, but I can't complain, you know." I answered with a shrug.

"That's good to know, sweetheart. You've done a great job this year. A really great job." Unser told me.

I decided to go back to my booth, when I ran into Opie.

"Hey. Is everything okay?" I asked, knowing when my brother was in pain.

"Yeah. Just a hard time with the kids, that's all." Opie answered, and I felt bad for him.

"Look. Everything will turn out just fine, just give it some time, okay?" I told him, placing my hand on his shoulder. Opie looked at me with a smile on his face.

"You're the best sister, you know that?" Opie said and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah, and you better remember it." I called back. Gemma stood there waiting for me when I got back.

"Hey. I saw you talking to Kyle. Is everything all right?" Gemma asked me.

"Yeah, it's all right, I just needed to remind him that things aren't like he remembers." I told her honestly.

"You know, sweetheart. You should really tell Jax about all of this. I kept your secret for the last 8 years, I don't think this is something you want me to keep any longer." Gemma said, and I knew she was right.

"Yeah, I got you." I told her and decided to tell them right now. Opie and Jax was about to grab a smoke when I walked over. Jax had a huge smile on his face when he saw me, and offered me one as well, which I took gladly. I needed some time to grow a pair, and tell them about Kyle and me. They wouldn't take it lightly.

"You know, this club means everything to me. The only thing I wanted from the time I went here." Opie told us. "But everything else… Donna, the kids, work… are all heading in the opposite direction. I just can't hook shit up. Feel like I'm missing on every front." I hated that my brother was feeling this way. He didn't deserve it.

"I got no answers." Jax said with a chuckle. "My family plan is right out of the Sid and Nancy handbook."

"I'm so used to shit moving in the other direction, I don't know what I'd do if something actually hooked up." I said, gaining laughter from both of them. We looked up seeing Kyle playing with his kids, and I knew I had to tell them soon.

"You think he's happy?" Opie asked us.

"I don't know." Jax answered, and I decided to just rip the bandage off.

"Hey, I need to tell you something… Something I should've told you 5 years ago." I said, clearing my throat. Both Jax and Opie looked at me, but Kyle's cheering interrupted us. He got egg on his jacket and took it off, exposing his back a little. I flinched when I saw that he still had the reaper tattoo on his back. And even I knew that if you were thrown out of the club, you had to cover up the tattoo.

"He still has that tat." Opie stated, and Jax was pissed off.

"Yeah." Jax said, and he was ready to do some damage to Kyle. But my brother stopped him.

"This is me." Opie said, and I knew that this would end badly. I couldn't stay too far away from this, and followed Opie inside. Something told me that I needed to be there. Oh, how I hated this.

I stood by the door, watching Opie interact with Kyle.

"I been doing what Jax asked. I'm staying clear of everyone." Kyle said, trying to keep things cool.

"Think you and I need to settle a few things." Opie said, not showing that much emotions.

"Yeah, I guess we do." Kyle agreed.

"I learned something horrible today, that I can't wrap my head around." Opie said, and I held my breath.

"So, she finally told you, huh? Sophie finally told you about us being in love, wanting to be together and stuff." Kyle said, and I thought I was about to die. The look on Opie's face turned darker than I've ever seen it.

"You fucking touched my sister?" Opie asked darkly, clenching his fists.

"Well, yeah. We were together for three years before I screwed her over." Kyle answered, not being entirely truthful. We were never together. We could've been if Kyle hadn't stabbed me in the back, and the fact that he would never be Jax Teller.

In that moment, Opie lost his temper and attacked Kyle. I was afraid that he would kill him, and his kids didn't need to lose their father again, so I decided to interfere with the shit happening in front of me.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax watched as Sophie walked after her brother, not knowing why she would. And what the hell did she want to tell himself and Opie? Obviously, something was plaguing her mind. Jax tried to let it go, and crossed the yard, seeing Donna standing on the far end. Jax had to wrestle his way through the kids, to get to the other side, laughing as he did.

"Little Harry looks like he knows his way around a gun." Jax said with a grin, but only gained a glare from Donna.

"I'm kidding." Jax felt the need to defend himself.

"Thanks for the crib money." Donna told him. "Any little bit helps right now."

"Yeah, I get how rough it is for you guys. I know you've always had trouble wrapping your head around the M.C. life, but Sam Crow is the only…" Jax started to say, but Donna cut him off.

"Your mom and Sophie's already given me the Sam Crow-is-the-glue-speech." Donna shot back at him.

"I'm not talking about you and Sam Crow. I'm talking about you and Ope." Jax said.

"What happens with me and Opie is no one's business." Donna argued, feeling trapped into a corner.

You're wrong. He's my best pal. I love that guy almost as much as I love Sophie, which says a lot. But I also see what's happening to him, and it scares the shit out of me." Jax told her honestly. "Opie can't be half in, half out. It'll get him killed, Donna."

"Then I want him out. That other guy got out, Kyle." Donna started to say.

"Kyle was kicked out. You know why? 'Cause the night Opie got arrested for blowing up that truck yard, Kyle was supposed to be his getaway ride, only the asshole panicked when he heard sirens. Left Opie behind." Jax said, trying not to think back about that time.

"Opie never said anything, and I sure as hell don't understand why Sophie didn't." Donna said, trying to keep her cool.

"Cause Opie's not a rat. Brothers don't turn on each other. He did the time. It's what we do. Opie will never walk away from the club. We both know that. He's like me. It's all we know. It's in our DNA. If you keep pulling him in the other direction We're not the glue, Donna, you are." Jax told her truthfully.

Donna looked at the man in front of her, thinking that she said more than she was supposed to, and Jax noticed.

"Hey... Why did you mean about Sophie not saying anything?" He asked.

"That's not my story to tell. You need to talk to her." Donna said quickly, moving away from Jax, before he could ask her any more questions. Sophie would've killed her, if she knew that Donna was the one to tell Jax about Kyle and Sophie.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I ran inside, trying to stop Opie from killing Kyle. What I felt about him, was gone the second I learned what he had done to my brother.

"Opie, stop! He's not worth it!" I yelled, trying to pry my brother away from him.

"He fucking touched you, Sophie. He took advantage of you for years. You were just a kid." Opie yelled back at me, and it made me see red.

"I was not a kid, Harry! I was 21 when he and I got together. And I ended it all when I learned that he fucked you over." I argued back at him.

"He was married, for fuck's sake! Why would you do that? You know how much it hurt my mom when our dad cheated on her. You of all people should know that. Being a product of an affair, wrecking up a marriage." Opie said, and I could tell he regretted immediately, and he knew that he just broke my heart.

"Shit, Sophie, I'm so sorry." Opie started to say, but I cut him off.

"No, fuck you, Harry… You know how insecure I am about myself and who my mother is. You have no idea what it felt like back then, with Jax fucking everything that crawled, you being married to my best friend, having the most precious children in world. I was left behind, and Kyle was there, and he managed to put a few small pieces back together. And when he did what he did to you, I broke it off, because I loved my brother more than anyone else in this world. I'm just sad that you didn't love me the same way." I said, feeling the tears burn in my eyes.

Before Opie could answer me back, I turned around, and walked away, but not before bumping into Jax. By the look on his face, he had heard every single word.

"Is it true? Did you have a relationship with Kyle?" Jax asked me, keeping his expressions neutral.

"Yeah. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier." I said, I was kind of ashamed of it, and I don't blame you for being repulsed and angry with me. "But nothing you can say to me right now, would be more hurtful than what my brother just said. I'll see you later."

"Sophie, wait." Jax called, but I didn't stop. I needed to get away from this situation, and I needed a break from the fundraiser.

I walked quickly over to our booth, Gemma watching me closely, knowing something wasn't right.

"Sophie? What's wrong?" Gemma asked me.

"I need some time to myself. Can you hold the fort by yourself for an hour or two?" I asked her, grabbing my purse.

"Sure thing, sweetheart. Take some time off, and I'll see you later." Gemma agreed, knowing I would need it.

"Is it something Jax did?" she asked me, but I only shook my head. "No, it has nothing to do with that.

"No, this time, it's my brother that said something." I said a little too harsh. "Sorry… I'll see you later."

* * *

I walked away hurriedly, wanting to get to my car quickly. I couldn't believe that Opie would ever use my own mother against me, to hurt me. I have never even seen my mother, other than in the arms of Darby, and the fact that he teases me about it at any chance he gets.

I drove to the town square, parking my car. I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself down. I got out of the car, deciding to go and get a coffee. I hated that my brother said that to me, and when I saw his name on the display on my phone, I just ignored it. I did not want to talk to him right now.

I bought my coffee at the local café, and decided to sit down on a bench, just trying to collect my thoughts. I know I should've told my brother about what happened with Kyle, but I was so pissed off and humiliated that I thought that Kyle would change for me. But the truth was… I was never going to run away with him. Because he wasn't Jax. And he would never be him, no matter how much I wanted him to be.

"When did you fuck up your life like this, Sophie Winston?" I groaned to myself. I drank up what was left of my coffee, and I was about to head back to the fundraiser, when a man sat there, looked to be a homeless man, with a beautiful Rottweiler, and a large box in front of him. Something told me to go over there and say hello to the man. He looked so friendly, and when I got close enough, I saw that the sign on the box said:

 **"** **Do you have compassion?"**

What melted my heart, was the nice eyes of the dog sitting next to him. She had kind eyes, and I thought to myself that I would fall in love with that girl.

"Oh, what a beautiful dog you are." I said, making me sound as if I was talking to a baby. "Can I?" I asked the owner, silently begging to pet his dog.

"Sure thing, sweetheart. My little Sofie here, is the kindest dog you'll ever find. The meaning of her name, is 'sweet'." The man said proudly, and I was about to burst with pride.

"You don't say?" I couldn't help but answer. "Well, she's a good dog, and I can tell that you're taking good care of her."

A sudden noise from the box made me alert. I opened the box as carefully as I could, and I was in awe, when the content was revealed to me. A pair of icy blue eyes met my own, and I've never fallen in love with anything this quickly.

"Oh, my god. This is the most precious thing I've ever seen!" I exclaimed, looking down at this precious puppy. I couldn't help myself and picked up that lonesome puppy, feeling the urge to keep him close to me. "Oh, you're the prettiest thing I've ever seen in my life, except my boy, Abel. Yes, you are."

I couldn't help but laugh when he started to lick my face, showing me comfort and unconditional love.

"Well, his other brothers and sisters died before they had a chance to live. This little fellow right here, is a freak of nature, he just decided that he wanted to live, and here he is." The owner said.

"That's sad. He's such a precious little boy, but he's not a full Rottweiler. Who's the father?" I asked, knowing that this wasn't a pure breed.

"He's a Siberian Husky. A meetup not going according to plan." The man answered, and I fell in love with the puppy even more. I was a product of something not going according to plan. An accident. I felt connected to this puppy somehow, and I wanted to keep him. I needed someone to take care of, that would love me unconditionally.

"How much?" I asked without thinking, making the man gasp in shock. He didn't think I meant it.

"What do you mean, sweetheart?"

"How much for the puppy?" I repeated. "I know I can give him a good home and the care he needs."

The man looked at me briefly, before looking at his dog, the mother of the puppy I was holding. The reaction of the mother as I held her only living offspring, was that she sat down by my feet, nudging my hand, as if she was telling me to take her puppy home.

"Well. It seems as if Sofie has made her decision. The puppy is yours if you want it. No payment necessary." The man said. "I just want that puppy to have a great home. To no price what so ever."

I couldn't help but smile and hugged the puppy closer to me.

"I promise I will take good care of him." I ranted on, but the man stopped me.

"Take him home, sweetheart. He belongs to you." The man said, but it didn't feel right, just to take this puppy away from him. And, when he pet his dog, and wasn't paying attention, I slipped him three hundred dollar bills. I didn't know what to pay for a mix, but I wanted him to have something for himself and his precious Sofie.

"Bless you, my child. Never change your ways. Do you hear me?" The man yelled after me, and I thanked him, silently, for giving me something to look after.

What the fuck did I do? How am I supposed to take care of this animal? I thought to myself, slowly panicking from my impulsive decision to take in a stray dog. A small whimper escaped from the little dog in my arms, and he licked my face all over.

I couldn't help but giggle. I looked into those beautiful eyes, all I could think of, was the movie I saw when I was 14… the movie about the two dogs and a cat. "Homeward Bound" Something told me that this puppy, who was a dog who got a second chance in life.

"That's what I'll call you…" I said to the little puppy. "Chance…"

He seemed to really like his name, and I'm glad I decided to do this. The first thing I did, was taking him to the local vet, just to make sure that Chance was a healthy and a happy dog.

As I opened the door, the old vet looked at me in surprise. Like he wasn't believing his eyes.

"Well, well. What in god's name have you done now, Sophie Winston?" The vet asked me.

"Hey, Mark. I just want to make sure that this little guy is okay." I said, showing off the little guy.

"Let me take a look, and if I am corrected, this puppy needs some shots and other things?" Mark stated more than asked, but I only nodded, too in love with my little man to form any words. Oh, I loved him already.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Watching as Sophie walking away in that kind of pain, made Jax want to turn around, and run after her. But his hate for Kyle and then fact that he had hurt Sophie, made him want to fuck Kyle up even more. Jax walked up to Opie and Kyle, trying to seem unaffected.

"See you two have been talking." Jax stated sarcastically, knowing that Opie had done most of the hitting, and he suspected that the punch to his face, was all Sophie's doing.

"Yup." Opie said, not too proud of himself for what he said to his sister. He pushed that out of his mind and focused on Kyle. "You seem to be doing all right. New truck, nice piece of ass."

"Yeah, I guess." Kyle said with a sigh. "I miss it, man. I miss it all. When I had that cut on, everybody knew who I was. Even if I never met 'em, man, I got instant respect. Now I'm just like every other shithead."

Jax wanted to kill him for even looking at Sophie, and now he knew that Kyle had been having sex with his girl. He did not like this.

"You started telling me something earlier. The stolen parts thing." Jax said trying to keep his cool.

"Yeah, I'd love to bring it to the club. Let you guys share in the pie. It's my way of saying sorry." Kyle told them, and Jax could sense his plan of what to next, was going to work perfectly.

"We could run it by Clay." Opie said mainly to jax.

"Yeah. Jax agreed. "It's kind of a complicated time for us right now, so We should probably do it tonight while you're still in town."

"Yeah, absolutely." Kyle agreed eagerly.

"What about your kid's band?" Opie asked, knowing how much it would mean for his son to have his father there.

"Hey, it's cool. I can hear him some other time." Answered, that sucker.

"All right." Jax agreed, walking away with Opie.

"This shit is fucked up, man." Opie said, scratching his head.

"Yeah, it kind of is." Jax agreed before punching Opie in the face.

"That was for being a dick to your sister." Jax told him, before patting his back. "You've got some shit to apologize for with your sister, and that's coming from me."

* * *

Back at the garage, Clay was trying to make it all work without Gemma or even Sophie there to help him with the paper work. At the same time, he still had Chuck in his possession, and he was a sick fuck as well.

Clay was desperately trying to figure all of this out, at the same time as his costumer was getting impatient.

"It's the plum-colored Volvo." She said, rolling her eyes. Clay found her key, and continued his search for the paperwork.

"Paperwork must be in the garage.." He told her and left the lady in the office. What he didn't expect, was for Chuck to walk in, doing damage.

"Excuse me. Have you seen Clay?" Chuck asked her.

"Yeah, he's looking for some paperwork." She answered, rather rudely.

The woman then freaked out, because of Chuck's problem with jerking off, and it sent her running out of the office without even paying for the repair. Clay cursed, and hated that man, couldn't wait to get rid of him.

"Chuck! Jesus Christ!" Clay yelled, before grabbing a hold of his neck, bringing him into the clubhouse.

"I step outside for five goddamn minutes, you can't watch him?" Clay asked Piney and Half-sack.

"I was just in the can." Piney argued.

"I was getting him the soft toilet paper. He hates the scratchy kind." Half-sack shot in quickly, not wanting his boss to think it was his fault.

"Well, I'm glad your ass is feeling loved." Clay said sarcastically. "Let's go, Chucky. We're picking up the Chink money now."

"We can't go now. The restaurant's open. Everybody's there." Chuck told him.

"Yeah, everybody but us. I'm not sticking around for two more days and watching your hand puppet show. Get your stuff, now." Clay told him, warning him at the same time. He didn't want to deal with this shit.

"Call the guys. We got to do this thing now. And it could get messy." Clay told Piney and he was right, it was about to get messy.

Gemma looked at her phone one more time, just because she was worried about Sophie just taking off like that. She seemed very distraught, trying to call Sophie several times.

"Come on, Sophie, where are you?" Gemma asked under her breath. She looked up and saw Bobby and Tig walking up to her booth.

"You seen Jax?" Bobby asked her.

"He's with Ope. Why?" Gemma asked suspiciously.

"The boss wants us." Bobby answered.

"You got two more hours in that booth." Gemma argued, but she knew there was no use.

It never was. Gemma looked up and saw Sophie walking towards her, and she wasn't alone.

"What the hell have you done now?" Gemma exclaimed, and Sophie couldn't help but smile.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

Mark examined Chance thoroughly, to make sure that nothing was wrong with him. Chance didn't like it that much, and that's understandable. He was just a little puppy, and I just took him away from his mother. I was his mother now.

"You can start your breathing again, Sophie. He's just fine, healthy, all he needs is his shot, I.D chip, and you're good to go.

"That's great, but I'll need everything else. Such as food, bowls, toys, bed." I ranted on, and all Mark did, was laughing at me.

"Sophie, relax. Maria here can help you with all of that while I give this little guy the things he needs." Mark said, and I turned to see his assistant standing there with a bright smile on her face. I followed Maria who showed me the things I needed.

"I think you're doing a good thing for this puppy. He needs a good, loving home, and I think you'll do a great job." Maria told me and it made me feel better.

"Thank you." I said sincerely, and I couldn't wait to take my puppy home.

Just as I was about to pay for things, Mark came out of the room with Chance.

"All right, Sophie. Everything ready, and you'll need to come back once a year for his shot, but other than that, I wish to not see you here again until then." Mark told me, handing Chance to me. I knew he said that, because he wanted me to have a healthy dog.

"Thank you, Mark. For everything." I said, while snuggling Chance against my chest.

Maria helped me with getting stuff into my car, and I placed Chance in the seat beside me. I knew I would have to get a cage for him eventually, but right now, he's going to be right beside me.

I drove the sort way back to the fundraiser, and took Chance's new bed out of the car. He looked at me curiously, tilting his little head back and forth.

"Come on, Chance. I want you to meet your grandmother." I cooed at the new family member. With his bed in one hand, and him in the other, I walked towards the booth where Gemma was standing. She turned around, as if she knew that I was coming towards her. Her eyes landed on Chance, and I could tell she was surprised.

"What the hell have you done now?" Gemma asked me, and I couldn't help but blush.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself. I was sad, and this little guy needed me." I told her, holding Chance towards her. Gemma Teller-Morrow is a complex woman, a hard shell to crack open. But I could tell that shell was cracking, when she took a good look into those beautiful blue eyes.

"Well, he is a really cute one." Gemma said, scratching Chance behind the ear.

"Yeah, I fell in love with him instantly. And I think he'll be a good playmate to Abel." I told her, putting Chance's bed down on the ground.

"You know it's a lot of work with a dog, right?" Gemma told me.

"Yeah, but I want to do it." I said, placing Chance on the bed. He looked at me with a questioning look, but settled down in his bed rather quick.

"Speaking of work… where's Bobby and the guys?" I asked, not seeing any one of them around.

"Clay called… he needed them. That bastard. He knew that we needed Bobby today." Gemma answered rather pissed off.

"It sucks being the boss, don't it?" Unser said, sneaking up behind us.

"You know that fried shit's gonna kill you." Both Gemma and I said at the same time, making Unser laugh.

"Yeah, 'cause the cancer's keeping me fit and spunky." Unser said sarcastically. I found it unfair that Wayne was battling with cancer, but that's how life is.

I was just about to put down water for Chance, when Gemma kicked me in the ankle, trying to get my attention.

"What?" I asked annoyed, and that's when I saw her. Tara was here, looking around. I bet she was actually looking for Jax, because Gemma told me that she's been talking to Jax a lot when he's at the hospital.

I watched as Tara saw someone across the yard, and she looked genuinely scared of this person.

I looked her way, and I saw that same man that stood outside Abel's room the other day. Gemma looked at him suspiciously as well.

"Hey, who's that guy behind the grill?" Gemma asked.

"That's our new best friend Agent Kohn. ATF." Unser told us, and it made my insides twist. Why would he come to Abel's room and not introduce himself, yesterday?

"The fed looking into the club, is grilling sausages?" Gemma asked and it surprised me that she already knew that this was a fed.

"Must be part of his special federal training. Good chili." Unser said, trying to stop our questions with the love of our food.

I did not like it that this Agent Kohn is here, and better yet… why is Tara running away from him? Why was she so scared of him?

"Mama Gem. Look." I said as Jax, Bobby and Tig walked towards the parking lot. I could see Gemma fuming with anger, and I know that she would confront her son.

"You tell Clay I'm pissed off. Bad enough his sorry ass isn't here. Now he's talking all my manpower." Gemma hissed at him. Jax knew better than to talk back to his mother, and focused on Agent Kohn.

"Who's that guy with the cops?" Jax asked.

"That's your ATF guy." Gemma confirmed.

"That guy was at the hospital last night watching Sophie and me with Abel." Jax said, and it made me shiver, and wanting to protect that little boy even more.

"That's dangerous, brother. Shit." Tig said, not liking this as all.

"Well, you keep an eye on him. If he follows us out of here or leave at any point, you give me a call." Jax told the both of us.

"Pre-pay?" I asked.

"Yeah." Jax confirmed. He looked at me with gratitude before he left. I couldn't help but stare after him, wanting to come with him, but I knew I had to stay here. Suddenly, I felt something collide with my legs, and looked down at Chance. He looked up at me in a daze, probably thinking that I was walking too far away from him. I couldn't help but laugh at him and picked him up.

"Oh, Chance. That's the other man in my life. I really want to just let go and be with him, but I really do like to complicate things for myself." I told him, as if he understood me. He let out a round of growls, before licking my face. I just knew that he would fit into this family perfectly.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Jax and the others didn't take any chances with Chuck this time around, and taped his wrists to his thighs, so he would jerk off in front of them again. It was torture for him and it made him itch like crazy.

"What's to stop them from calling the cops? Trespassing, vandalism." Chuck blurted out.

"I'm more worried they'll call Lin." Jax answered.

"None of them have direct contact with him." Chuck said, trying to get his hands free.

"Is this really necessary?"

"Yeah." Jax told him.

When they arrived at their destination, Jax wasn't so sure about this at all.

"You sure this is the place?" Jax asked him suspiciously.

"I did the books out of the back office. Restaurants are how they wash the money." Chuck confirmed, before they brought him out of the van.

"Our friends in the Beemer shouldn't be far behind." Clay told Tig.

"We'll be ready." Tig assured his president. A woman stopped them as they came into the restaurant. Clearly, Chuck wasn't welcome here.

"Masturbater, masturbater!" The woman yelled.

"I accept that."

"Get out of my restaurant! You no work here. No eat go right now!" The woman told him but they just ignored her.

"Where?"

Chuck ushered them into the kitchen, trying to ignore the call of the chefs.

"The ceiling above the stove. That square of new plastic. Used to be an exhaust fan. I stuffed it in there before they plastered it." Chuck told them and Jax jumped into action.

"Gonna need something heavy." He told them, and Clay gave him this meat hammer thing.

"I call cops! You ruin my kitchen, crazy knife man!" The woman yelled at him, but Jax couldn't care less.

"Down the side vent to the left." Chuck instructed, and he was right, the bag was there, stashed with cash.

"Holy shit!" Jax exclaimed at the cash.

"Told you."

"I accept that." Clay said with a triumphant smile.

"You pay for damage! You go to jail! All you crazy man…" the woman kept on yelling but Clay just gave her an unknown amount of money.

"Shut up." He said beyond annoyed.

"I love jerky-jerkoff. You come back, okay?" She cheered after them.

"Our friends of the Beamer are here." Tig told them as they came back outside. "Another interested party. He's been taking laps in a silver Caddy."

"The shit is on." Jax said, taking his gun out.

"All right, let's move. Jax drives." Clay ordered and everyone knew that this was bad

Jax tried his best to get out of the parking lot, but the exits were blocked by cars. Jax thought he could force his way out but that only made thing worse.

"Well, that didn't work." Jax said sarcastically, knowing they were in some deep shit. Sophie would kill him when she got her hands on him. He had just crash her van.

"What's the plan here, Clay?" Jax asked him.

"All we want is the bag." A voice yelled from outside the van.

"Plates. These are plates for a 20." Clay told them and Jax was officially pissed off.

"This shit's counterfeit?" Jax yelled at Chuck.

"It's not shit. It's really good. These bills will pass anywhere." Chuck answered and Clay had enough and punched him in the face.

"God damn it." Clay exclaimed.

"This is your last chance." The man on the outside warned them and Clay had to think quickly.

"Hold up! Easy! I think we can make a deal." Clay said as he slowly got out of the van with the bag. "I want to talk to Lin."

It seemed to do the trick and Lin came out of his car.

"Here's your money." Clay told him and threw the bag on the ground. "But I'm guessing that's not what you're looking for."

Clay showed him one of the plates.

"Where's the other plate?" Lin asked him.

"It's in the van. Look, we both got jerked around here. Now, I need real cash. You need the cash-maker." Clay said, laying it out on the table. "Hey, cops will be here in a heartbeat."

"I got the cops under control." Lin argued. "Ten grand."

"Hundred." Clay argued back.

"30."

"60, and I'll throw in the door prize. Hey, Chuck?" Clay yelled and a second later, Bobby and Tig came out with him.

"This was not our deal. I want to talk to Otto." Chuck yelled, scared for what's to come when Lin got his claws in him.

"Pay Elvis and his friends." Lin demanded his crew.

"Get the other plate." Ordered his own.

"Guys, guys, really. This is, this is a big mistake. You don't want to do this. Come on. Really, you don't want to do this. Look, I had a deal with big Otto. I kept my end of the bargain." Chuck kept on pleading, but no one even cared.

"Pleasure." Clay said as they traded the plate for the money. "See ya, Chucky."

Clay and the Sons didn't even care about Chuck's screaming as the Chinese dragged him away. They got what they came for, what else is there to it?

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

The evening was coming fast and I was tired. It had been a long day, and with Chance and all, I wanted to get home soon. I wondered how everything was going with Jax and the others. Gemma could sense this and stopped me from packing.

"Hey… Why don't you go to the clubhouse, spend some time with your father, show off his new grandchild, and wait for Jax. I think it's time that the two of you sit down, and talk through your shit." Gemma told me. I looked over at Chance, and he was curled up in his little bed. It must have been a hard day for him as well. Being torn away from his mother like that, having to depend on me from now on.

"Okay. Are you sure that you don't need me to help out?" I asked just to offer my help.

"Go! And please stay at the club tonight. I don't like this fed sniffing around. We don't know if he'll show up on your doorstep." Gemma told me and I didn't argue. It was better to stay at the clubhouse. Everyone knew that.

I hugged Gemma, before picking up Chance, carefully. I didn't want to disturb him, but then again, I wanted to cuddle him.

I drove back to the clubhouse, seeing that my dad was here. Chance jumped up when my car stopped and he looked around confused.

"Sorry, baby. Let's get you inside, okay?" I felt the need to whisper. I opened the door and walked in. My dad was sitting at the bar, nursing his drink.

"Hey, dad." I said, and he turned around, his eyes widening.

"What the hell! Is that a fucking dog?!" Dad asked, and I just rolled my eyes.

"Yes, dad. It's a dog. I just picked him up today. He's a Rottweiler and Siberian husky mix. He was all alone, and had no one. I felt the urge to protect him." I answered, and I could tell that my dad wasn't that angry or frustrated by the fact that I now owned a dog. But he did surprise me when he got up, took the puppy away from me, and started cuddling it.

I did not see that coming.

"What's his name?" Dad asked me.

"I've decided to call him Chance." I said with a smile.

"What? Like the dog from that movie you dragged me to see when you were 14?" That made my eyes bulge out of my head. How is it possible for him to remember that?

"Yeah. Something like that." I said honestly.

"Well, he's a fine dog. But you'll have your work cut out for you. It won't be a walk in the park." Dad said, and it was his way of giving me approval for getting the dog. Something told me, that dad would do a lot of work with Chance.

* * *

I placed Chance in the bedroom, hoping that he would stay asleep this time around, because mama needed a beer.

When I got back at the bar, Kyle was already there, and I inwardly groaned.

"Hey, Sophie. Didn't know you would be here." Kyle said carefully.

"Yeah, well. It makes sense that I'm here. You, on the other hand, should stay away. You only got back here to see your kid play. And then you blow it off for this? Wow. You're even dumber than I am." I said, grabbing a beer and a shot of Tequila.

I couldn't stand sitting next to Kyle, so I invited my dad to play a few games of pool. It was so much fun. Dad was getting drunk, so I was scoring more points than he was. Not that I know how to take score in pool.

In the middle of our game, the door slammed open, and the rest of the Sons were back from wherever they were.

"It smells in here." Tig said, and I immediately thought that Chance had soiled the carpet in the room I was keeping him. But then again, it smelled like pussy and alcohol.

"How did it go with the Chinese?" My dad asked the ones returning.

"Not too good." Jax said with a sigh, taking a beer of his own.

"Well, where's Chucky?"

"That's the upside." Clay added.

"Clay, it's good to see you, man." Kyle said, holding out his hand. But as suspected, Clay ignored it.

"So, I hear you got an offer I can't refuse." Clay said, taking a sip of his beer… I didn't want to listen anymore and walked towards the room Chance was sleeping in.

I knew I wouldn't be going alone, seeing that my brother just walked through the door.

"Well, I better get back to do the fireworks, or your mom's gonna be stuffing gunpowder up my ass." Opie said, following me.

"Yeah, I'm sure we're all on Gemma's shit list by now." I heard Jax agreed.

I walked down the corridor with a quick pace, wanting to get away from my brother, but damn, that bastard is faster and stronger than me.

"Sophie, wait, please." Opie called after me, but I wasn't having it. "Sophie, I'm sorry for what I said to you."

"Are you, really? Opie… you used my own mother against me. You of all people, know how bad I feel about that. I'm not proud of how I did things with Kyle, but you're my brother. You shouldn't judge me like that." I said, trying to keep my anger under control.

"I know, Sophie, I shouldn't have treated you like that." Opie quickly agreed. I could tell that he was sorry, I could see it in his eyes. He hated it when I was angry with him, but I couldn't forgive him yet.

"You're my brother, and I love you. But you're gonna have to work hard as shit to make me forgive you." I told him and he knew that I meant what I said.

"I'll do whatever you want me to. I'll be your little bitch if you need me to." Opie said quickly, hugging me to him. Our moment was interrupted by Jax.

"Ope. You okay with this?" Jax asked and I understood that they were about to do something bad to Kyle.

"Yeah." Opie confirmed. "You?"

"I'm good."

"Look, about what I was saying earlier doesn't mean I don't want this." Opie told him.

"I know."

"I'd rather be dead than be that guy." Opie said, and I hated it when he talked like that.

"Yeah, me, too." Jax stated.

"You should get going. I can hear Mama Gem swearing from here." I said with a chuckle.

Opie agreed and walked away, to get back to the fireworks he promised Gemma.

* * *

Jax and I stood there watching each other, not knowing what to say. Everything between us, was so messed up and I wanted to just forget everything and start over.

"Did you really plan on leaving back then?" Jax asked me about me and Kyle.

"Yeah, maybe, I don't know." I answered uncomfortably. "I guess I lost a part of myself and I couldn't do it anymore. Kyle was there, holding me up when I felt everything was falling apart. I knew you wouldn't approve of me leaving, and I felt bad about that. But what made me feel worse, was the fact that Kyle did this to my brother, and I felt ashamed that I ever had feelings for him."

I know I was pathetic for shedding a few tears, but I couldn't help it.

"Look, Sophie…" Jax started to say, but I cut him off.

"No, don't. Okay? What's done is done. I know I ended up leaving anyway, but now you understand why. I couldn't stay here, and keep the shameful secret of me and Kyle. And I'm so sorry…"

Jax cut me off by cupping my face in his hands, and crushing my lips to his. Every ounce of hurt and pain could easily be explained in simple actions. Just like this. What I thought would start off as hungry and possessive, turned into tender and exploring. It didn't say anything and yet, it said everything.

'I want to try again', 'I forgive you', 'I love you.'

Jax rested his forehead against mine, and I could tell that he was relieved. He knew that I was coming around, and I just hope that he wouldn't take it for granted.

Suddenly, a scratching noise came from his room, and someone whining.

"What the hell?" Jax said under his breath.

"Yeah, about that. I kinda did this spur of a moment-thing." I said with a blush. Jax opened his door, and Chance came bouncing out. "I got a dog."

Chance bounced towards me, wanting his mama. Oh, how cute!

"A dog, really?" Jax asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes. I couldn't just leave him. I needed to rescue him." I answered, scooping my little puppy into my arms.

"Of course, you did." Jax said with a laugh, and scratched Chance behind the ear. "He is a cutie though. He's going to be a monster of a dog, but a good dog to protect you."

"And Abel." I added, grabbing onto Jax' hand. Jax gave me that Teller-boy-smile of his, and it melted my heart.

"I need to get back to Clay and the others. You should stay back here, and let us do what we need to do." Jax told me. "That's why I need you to stay with me at all times, because I know there's no way, you'll stay back here.

"You know me so well." I said, letting him kiss me again.

We walked back to the bar, and this time, Chance didn't complain about staying behind. We did some shots and Kyle told us some stories, but it was all for show. Everyone knew that something would happen. I kept myself close to Jax, because I didn't like the way Kyle was looking at me. He always was more attracted to me when he was getting drunk.

Clay silently told Jax that it was time to end this, and Jax couldn't agree more.

"Bobby! You tell Kyle about the knucklehead?" Jax asked Bobby.

"Who got a knucklehead?" Kyle asked, and we pointed at Bobby. "Bullshit."

"It's so beautiful. It'll blind you." Bobby told him.

"Where?"

"Come on, let's take a look at it." Jax said, downing another shot.

"You want to see it?" Bobby asked and Kyle was eager to.

"Yeah."

"Let's go! Right this way, mister." Bobby said, showing the way into the garage.

But when we got there, Kyle started to understand that something was wrong.

"Where's the knuckle? What is this?" Kyle asked. Jax let go of me, advancing towards him.

"Take your shirt off." Jax demanded.

"Come on, Jax." Kyle pleaded before looking at me. "Angel?"

That seemed to piss Jax off even more.

"Take it off! Son of a bitch!" Jax yelled as Bobby and Tig tore away Kyle's shirt, showing off his reaper tattoo.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Clay." Kyle said. "I know I was supposed to black it out and I tried, man. But I went a bunch of times and I couldn't I couldn't do it. This is the only thing I have left, Jax. Please, I'm sorry."

"After what you did to my family, my son, my daughter." Dad said repulsed.

"Wait… you knew?" I asked him, mainly in shock.

"A father knows everything, Sweetheart." He shot back without looking at me. "You deserve what's coming your way, Kyle."

"Fire or knife?" Clay asked calmly.

"Answer him." Jax said firmly, not wasting any time.

"Jax" Kyle pleaded, but nothing. Kyle knew his own fate. "Fire."

"All right." They all agreed, and I started shaking. I knew I should leave, but my legs stopped working. I was frozen in place, unable to move. I watched as they chained him up by the arms, preventing him from going anywhere, and them pouring whisky or bourbon down his back.

Jax looked at me, and he knew this was going to be rough. As Tig started the flame, Jax grabbed a hold of me, and wrapped his arms around me, pressing my face into his chest. I didn't need to see this. The sounds and smell alone, was more than enough. The smell of burnt human flesh is disgusting. I'm never going to get this smell out of my nose.

I tried my best to hold back my tears, but it wasn't easy.

After a few minutes of pain, Kyle passed out due to the shock and stress his body endured, it made the job easier for Tig to do.

"Jax. We'll handle this." My dad told him. "Take Sophie away from here, she's had enough of this."

I loved my father right now. Why didn't I listen to Jax in the first place? I didn't need to see this.

* * *

Jax kept his arms around me and followed me back to his room, only to be greeted by Chance. He stayed in his bed beside Jax's bed, and just stared at us.

"Are you okay?" Jax asked me, running his fingers down my neck in a soothing manner.

"Yeah. I just need to get this foul smell out of my clothes and hair. I need a shower." I answered, shrugging off my jacket and top. Leaving me in jeans and bra. Jax eyes widened, licking his lips in anticipation. He hadn't seen me like this since he was 15 years old. But right now, he knew it wasn't right to take that step. But he did strip his clothes and joined me in the shower. I needed to feel him close to me, and this moment, being wrapped in his arms under the warm water, did the trick. Jax did not take advantage of this, and just held onto me, occasionally kissing my shoulder, my cheeks. I wasn't ready to just pick up where we left off, but we're getting there. I should just be glad that he didn't judge me for what happened back then, that he didn't just throw me on my ass out for being in a relationship with Kyle.

I looked up into those beautiful eyes of his, and I feel myself getting lost in them once more. I kissed him lightly, pressing myself closer to him. This was the most I've been intimate with him since we were teenagers, and it felt right. It was scary….

But in a good way.

* * *

 **There it is... I hope you enjoyed reading it. I know that it seems as if Sophie has forgiven Jax, but they have a long way to go yet, so it may seem better than it is.**

 **I know, bringing in a dog is not a part of their universe, but I love dogs, and when I saw a picture of a rottweiler/Siberian Husky mix, I completely fell in love. You should google it yourself, and have a look. They are adorable.**

 **Did anyone of you suspect that Sophie would have a relationship with Kyle Hobart? I didn't plan on it when I started this story, but I thought it worked. Maybe Jax should've reacted differently, but with that secret in the open, it can roll around and bite them in the ass again, later on in the story.**

 **Their adventure is just starting, there's still a lot to come, and I can't wait to share it with all of you that enjoys this story.**

 **Please tell me what you thought of it.**

 **Until next time xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***peace486: Thank you so much! I hope you liked Sophie in this chapter.**

 ***Momoftwins: I know, right? It was a well deserved slap. And Jax has to continue to work for it. It may seem that everything's okay, but there's still a lot more that could happen.**

 ***love100008: Here's the next update. Jax will do whatever it takes not to break Sophie's heart again. But we all know, it won't be that easy.**

 ***Guest: You're right about Sophie giving herself some time. I think that's the reason she got that dog. She needed to focus on something else entirely. So even though Jax and Sophie seem okay, not everything is.**

 ***hillann: Thank you! I'm glad you like Sophie's character. She's fun to write.**

 ***Juliana: Here it is! And thank you!**

 ***xxcuriousmexx: I know, right? Their relationship will be a rollercoaster, so it will be a lot of up's and down's.**

 ***Emmettluver2010: Thank you! You got a glimpse of her past lovelife in this chapter. And maybe there will be some others jumping in, trying to sweep her off her feet. who knows...**


	9. Menopausal Meltdown

**Hi, Everyone!**

 **It took some time to update this story, but I'm hoping that you're still out there, and that you'll keep on enjoying it.**

 **A bit of warning; this chapter will get rather steamy, and I'm seriously thinking about changing the rating to M. Let me know if you don't want to read those kind of scenes, or if you think it fits with the story.**

 **I will put out a warning if it's getting naughty.**

 **Please enjoy this chapter, and let me know what you think.**

 _ **I do not own "Sons of Anarchy" only my oc.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

Something woke me up in the morning. Someone was kissing my neck softly, and I for once, did not want to be woken too early in the morning.

"Chance, get back to bed, it's way too early!" I barked, pushing him away from my face. But my arms and hands collided with something else entirely.

"Owe!" A muffle voice scared the crap out of me. I turned around, only to find Jax rubbing his forehead. We had stayed at the clubhouse yesterday, not that anything sexual had happened, yet.

"Oh, I am so sorry about that!" I exclaimed.

"Don't worry about it." Jax said, wrapping his arms around me, continuing to kiss my neck.

"Where's Chance?" I asked, trying to think straight. Not very simple I might ad.

"Your dad took him out an hour ago. He's a sucker for that puppy." Jax answered, his hands running down my side, finding his way under my shirt, caressing my skin.

"Yeah, well… I'm a sucker for this puppy right here." I said seductively, kissing him.

"You don't say." Jax grinned against my lips. He moved quickly, so he was on top, looking down on me, earning a giggle on my part. This whole situation was too surreal for me to actually believe it. I looked up at him, feeling the tension building between us. It was so scary, and yet so familiar. I ran my hand through his hair and continued down to his cheek, and he leaned into the palm of my hand.

"I love you." I whispered. "And I'm ready."

In that moment, everything changed between us. Jax looked at me as if I was his favorite Christmas gift, and that look in his eyes, held more passion than I ever thought possible. Jax scanned my face for a second, to see if I actually meant it. I grabbed a hold of the back of his neck and brought him down in a searing kiss. Jax pulled my top off, revealing my breasts, and to feel the cool air, made my nipples harden even more. Jax took a deep shuttering breath, before running his fingers across my breasts and abdomen, tracing the outline of my panties. I felt my heart skip a beat, and I tried to not get too worked up. Jax spread my legs wider apart, getting better access to the place he was seeking.

"Are you ready for me, Princess?" Jax asked, dipping his hand inside my panties.

"Yes." I answered with a gasp, my grip on his shoulders tightened in anticipation.

* * *

He was about to touch me, when the door swung open.

"Dad!" I yelled, covering me up as best as I could. Jackson jumped off me as quick as he could, waiting for my dad to go all kinds of crazy on him, for messing with his daughter. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Sorry, kiddo. I need my VP, and that puppy of yours needs him mama." Dad answered, not even concerned that his only daughter was practically naked, about to have sex with her boyfriend. Or maybe that's why he opened the door when he did. Only to fuck with our heads.

Chance jumped through the door, barking his little head off, bouncing towards the bed. I reached for my shirt, and pulled it over my head.

"Hi, baby." I said, smiling at the little dog. I still can't believe that I actually bought myself a dog a few days ago. I picked him up, and snuggled him as much as I could. I loved this little guy.

Jax was in the bathroom, getting ready for whatever my dad needed, who had already left the room for us to get dressed. I played with Chance on the bed, and he made me laugh at his shenanigans. I didn't even notice that Jax came out of the bathroom.

"It's nice to hear you laugh." Jax told me, and I couldn't help but smile his way. My breathing stopped, when I saw him standing there with nothing other than his ripped jeans, and shirt in hand, leaving him shirtless. I tried my best not to drool.

"Yeah. I feel happy right now." I said with a sigh. I couldn't ask for anything else in the world right now.

Jax walked over to the bed, sitting down next to me. He kissed my shoulder tenderly, and I melted into him.

"I'm sorry about this morning." Jax said, and I knew he was thinking about what might have happened between us.

"It's okay. It's not your fault my dad cockblocked us." I said, and it was the truth. "Look at it this way… tonight, you can come by my house, and maybe you and I can have our own sleepover?"

I could see Jax's eyes turn black with lust, and I hoped that I wouldn't regret it. Jax wrapped an hand around the back of my neck, and pulled me into a searing kiss, which I knew I would spend the entire day remembering.

"I'll hold you to that, okay?" He whispered a little out of breath.

"Oh, you better." I said playfully. "Now get going, before my father comes back and kicks your ass."

Jax kissed me again, before leaving the room. The silence that followed, was so weird. Jax and I almost had sex, and it made me feel like a teenager again. I wanted tonight to be special, and nothing could take this away from me. Not this time around.

I was about to make myself a cup of coffee, when I heard someone curse from the bathroom just outside Jax's dorm.

I opened the door, not knowing what to expect.

"What's going on?" I asked Kip and Bobby. They looked back at me with a wet thong in their hands, and I felt disgusted.

Chance thought this was fun, and bounced towards the flooding, wanting to have a good time. I yelped and managed to grab him just as he was about to roll around in the shit on the floor.

"You're a bad dog, Chance. Yes, you are." I cooed, before taking him away from that shithole.

I was about to grab myself a coffee, when Gemma walked into the Clubhouse.

"Hey, Mama Gem." I greeted her like I always did, but she just walked right past me, and didn't answer at all. She just barked at the croweaters and the sloppy men, before disappearing, and we could hear her office door slamming shut from the other side of the yard.

Whoa! Mama Gem sounded worked up. This could only mean one thing, and that acquired some good and strong coffee, and wiped the dust off the good old book of advice. It sounds like Gemma needs it.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

The car ride with Piney, didn't feel as awkward as Jax expected it to be. He thought that the old man would kick his ass and more, for practically having sex with his daughter right in front of him. But Piney didn't talk about it, so Jax tried his best to play it cool.

Everything seemed fine, but you could never know when it came to Piney, and he secretly loved to see his VP squirm. He may be old, but he wasn't a prune. He knew that Sophie made the right choices for her, he couldn't stop her. He didn't dare.

"How is my daughter doing these days?" Piney asked, trying to make it even more uncomfortable for Jax.

"Uh, she's Sophie, you know. She's all I ever wanted and the only thing I think I never deserve." Jax told him honestly and Piney hadn't expected that. He didn't know how to respond to that.

* * *

They drove out to where they would meet some of Piney's friends, that was interested in buying some of their AK-51's. The two men waiting, was itching to try the guns out, and took them to the shooting range. Piney and Jax stood there, watching them as they fired the guns.

"You okay selling these guys five AKs?" Jax asked him, still not sure about this.

"Yeah, Natey just hangs out with these survivalist cats, bunch of crazy old guys playing I don't know, capture the flag or something." Piney told him. "I wanted to thank you for peeling a few free so I could - let this happen, huh?"

"No problem, Piney." Jax confirmed, wanting to help what could be his future father-in-law.

"Those Russians make a hell of a gun, I'll give them that." Natey said, rather pleased as his friend gave Jax an envelope full of cash, but it didn't take him long to figure out that they tried to rip him off.

"Hey! Looks like you're about 5,000 light." Jax told him, not in the mood for this shit.

"I thought we were getting a family discount." Natey's friend answered, and it pissed Jax off even more.

"You are. $10,000." Jax said as calmly as he could.

"I know damn well these guns go for a grand on the street." The idiot was really starting to get on his nerves.

"When was the last time you were on the street, junior?" Jax asked, and he couldn't wait to smash his head in. Piney could tell, and he didn't want to clean up that mess.

"Russ, we had a deal. Give the man his goddamn money." Piney cut in.

"Pay him." Russ said quickly.

"Here you go. Sorry, man." Natey said and gave Jax the rest of the money. "Thanks, Piney. I'll be seeing you."

"Yeah, Nate. You take it easy, brother." Piney told him.

Piney and Jax walked back to their truck, and drove back towards Charming. Piney observed the young man, driving. He could see so much of John in him, it was kind of scary, but a good kind of scary. Piney knew how much his little Sophie loved him, and in his eyes, Sophie couldn't have chosen a better guy than him. Because that's what it's all about. It's Sophie's Choice.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I grabbed the whole pot of coffee, and walked over the yard towards Gemma's office, with Chance bouncing behind me. He had already adopted the lifestyle of being a biker, seeing that Tig lets him curl up in a ball on the back of his bike whenever he thinks Chance is telling him that he's tired. Chance loves sleeping on a Harley. Strange little dog.

I rolled my eyes as Chance stumbled across the yard, yapping his little mouth off, trying to be so cool. I carefully tap on the office door, not sure what to expect from Gemma.

"Come in." I heard her say through the door. I opened it and gave her the biggest smile I could without freaking her out.

"Hey…" I said softly. "I brought us some coffee."

"Thank you, sweetheart. I'm sorry for not saying good morning to you earlier." She said, taking the mug from my hands.

"It's okay. It's no big deal. Everyone has days like that." I said without thinking.

"Days like that? What the hell is that's supposed to mean?" Gemma asked, getting riled up for nothing.

"Jeez! Relax, Gemma!" I said, feeling the need of defending myself. "I didn't mean anything by it."

I could see Gemma's face soften a bit, and I knew she felt bad.

"Shit, Sophie. I'm sorry. I'm all over the place today." Gemma told me, and I felt bad for her. Something was not right.

"Gemma, what happened?" I asked, but before she could answer, Jax and my dad drove into the yard, telling us that they were back. I couldn't help but smile. I was glad that he was back in one piece, and not chopped up by my dad.

"Seems like your man is home." Gemma told me, giving me a smile. I knew we weren't through with our talk. It hadn't really started yet. But I knew better than to push her on it. I grabbed my coffee cup and walked towards Jax, who was meeting up with Clay.

"How'd this morning go?" I heard Clay ask him.

"Those jarheads are dicks, but it made Piney happy, think it's cool." Jax answered and I couldn't help but snicker.

"Any tails?"

"Naah. Doubled back three times. No one followed us." Jax answered, as he laid his eyes on me. His smile grew wider, and he opened his arms for me to get closer to him.

"Hey, baby." Jax said, wrapping his arms around me.

"Hi." I said with a sigh. He had just been gone for a few hours, but like the teenage girl I am, I missed him.

"Are you okay?" He asked me, rubbing my back gently.

"Yeah. Something is bothering your mom, though. She's being a hormonal bitch." I answered with a shrug.

"What else is new?" Jax said with a laugh, but I didn't find it funny. Something was bothering her, and I needed to figure out what to do about it.

"This is different, and I don't know what to do about it. How can I figure out what to do?" I was rambling on about things and Jax could tell that I was frustrated. He did the only think he could think of, and kissed me, to shut me up. It was working, and melted into him. If it were up to me, I would've jumped him, right here in the parking lot, but alas… Juice came driving the truck in. I groaned, knowing that Jax would once again, be occupied with that shitty job, Clay wanted the job to do. Dealing guns.

"The rest of the AKs are here." Jax told Clay who looked pleased.

"Call the Niners. I'm sure Leroy will be thrilled that the Russian firepower appeared a day early." Clay ordered, as he looked over at Gemma. "I'll be right back."

When Clay returned, I gave Jax a kiss, before I walked back to Gemma. I know she didn't want to bother Clay with anything, but I knew Mama Gem better than that.

"You don't seem fine. You seem depressed." I told her and Gemma only gave me a sad smile.

Kip walked up to us, and he looked even worse than before. He really didn't like this part of being a prospect.

"Do you have the number for the septic guy?" Kip asked her, and I couldn't help but giggle.

"Piney filled the tanks already?" Gemma said, and that made me gag.

"Yeah, and someone's been flushing lace panties." Kip answered with a strained laugh.

"I don't even know what to say to that." Gemma exclaimed.

"Are you kidding? Chance tried to jump into it, taking a swim!" I said, looking down at the puppy, sleeping soundly on top of Tig's Harley. What did I tell you, strange dog!

"Here you go." Gemma said, fighting the urge to roll her eyes.

"Thanks. You look real nice today, Gemma." Kip said, being kind of shy. It was adorable. Kip is the most adorable thing out there.

"Thank you, Eddie." Gemma told him, and she meant it. Kip smiled before turning around to go back to the Clubhouse.

* * *

Suddenly, commotion happened out on the lot, Clay seemed worked up about something, and this girl that Juice brought with him seemed to be the reason. I looked at Gemma, and I could see the suspicion and insecurity reek from her. Which was rather strange, knowing that Gemma was the most confident person there is.

Kip didn't seem to like it that this girl was here, and turned around to make the call in Gemma's office.

"Who's that girl?" Gemma asked him as I closed the door for privacy.

"I don't really I don't know." Kip said, and I knew he was lying.

"I saw your heart skip a beat from here. Who is she?" Gemma repeated herself, and you never make Gemma repeat herself, ever.

"Just a Tribe hang-around." Kip said, feeling uncomfortable. I could tell Gemma was angry.

"Clay hit that tart, didn't he?" Gemma pressed on, and I knew this would turn ugly.

"I don't really know who Clay's hitting." Kip argued before adding. "Except for you. I'm sure he's hitting you 'cause you're his wife and all."

I facepalmed myself, knowing that was the wrong thing to say to Gemma right now.

"Kip, just go. Go before you get a high heeled shoe up your ass." I said, opening the door for him. Kip didn't think twice about it, and practically ran out the door.

I expected Gemma to throw a tantrum, but when I saw her crying, I didn't know what to do. I've never seen Gemma cry in years. I sat down next to her, and hugged her. I didn't want to say anything to make this worse for her. Something was really bothering her.

And I did the only thing I could think of.

"Okay, get up." I said, making Gemma look at me.

"Why?" She asked suspiciously.

"Because I can't begin to understand that shit you're going through right now, so let's go see Luann. If there's someone other than me you'll open up to, it would be her. Now, let's go." I told her, before opening the door.

Chance made noise from Tig's bike, and I picked him up. I walked over to my dad, and asked if he could watch him for a little while. My dad, who secretly loves that dog to death, was more than happy to do it.

Gemma was already in the car, when I walked out on the lot. Jax stood there, with a cigarette in his mouth, looking all kinds of hot, it made my insides melt.

"Where are you off to?" Jax asked me, wrapping one arm around my waist.

"I'm just doing some stuff with your mom, and then I was thinking about go see your son later. Maybe I'll see you there?" I offered, and it made Jax break out in a smile.

"Sound good, Darling." Jax told me, and couldn't help but kiss him again. Gemma didn't like to be kept waiting, and used the car horn to tear me away from her son.

"Sorry about that. I need to get her out of here before she does something to hurt me." I said, and Jax kissed my cheek before letting me go.

"Hey! I love you." Jax told me, and I couldn't help but blush.

"I kinda like you too." I said before getting into Gemma's car. My smile vanished, when I saw the sour look on her face. She was not herself and it started to down on me what she was going through, but I'm sure as hell, is not going to bring that up in a moving car.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

After saying goodbye to his woman, Jax was called into Church. Chibs was finally back from his run, and he had news for them.

"Who'd McKeavy see up north?" Clay asked Chibs.

"Few gun brokers, some Irish expats, and fat, black hookers." Chibs answered, as he grabbed himself a smoke.

"Where's he now?" Jax asked.

"He's greasing the palms of the Port Authority contacts." Chibs told them. "All right, we got a week, maybe ten days, then he wants his 200K."

"We're working on it."

"Clay, he made it very clear. We got to have the money up front for the IRA to keep them flush. Otherwise, he'll sell to the Russians. And we lose the Irish pipeline to our guns." Chibs explained, trying to make it clear on how this was.

"Laroy's gonna take the three dozen AKs off our hands." Bobby shot in.

"Yeah. At a deep discount." Clay argued.

"It's either that or spend a month finding a better buyer. At least this way, it puts 50 grand in our pockets now. Plus, the ten I got this morning and the Chinese money. Gets us more than halfway there." Jax informed them, but before they could talk more about this, Kip opened the door.

"Clay. You better get out here." Kip said, and something in his voice, told Clay to listen to him and they all walked outside to see someone approaching them.

"Now you're either feds or limo drivers." Clay said to the woman walking up to them and she seemed smug when she flashed her badge.

"Agent Stahl, ATF. I'm looking for the owner of Teller-Morrow Automotive." She told them.

"That's me." Clay said, and in the next moment, he was in handcuffs. "You gonna bother mentioning a charge?"

"No charges yet. I just need to discuss your relationship with a Nate Meineke." Agent Stahl told him.

"Who?"

"He's one of the men who held up a prison transport vehicle this morning. Killed three people with AK-47s. We found Mr. Meineke's cell phone at the scene. Last call he received was from your garage." She explained and you could tell, she loved it.

"Preference?"

"Lady's choice." Clay answered when Stahl asked him where in the car he would like to sit.

"Tattoos and chivalry. Delicious combination." She said as she opened the door to the backseat.

* * *

After they drove off with Clay, the rest of the Sons did what they could, unloading the truck. Piney was feeling bad about all of this, and he felt responsible.

"I was in the garage waiting for you to get off my daughter, and come out to meet me. I just called Nate to confirm the meet. I never thought anything like this would happen." Piney said, and Opie reacted to the fact that his best friend was trying to get into his sister's pants.

"You had no idea what they were up to, Pop." Opie said, helping them out with the unloading.

"I don't get off that easy, though. I let friendship interfere with business." Piney argued. "I know better."

"Gotta reach out to 'em, Piney. We need to find these guys before the feds do." Jax told him.

"Nate will not rat on me." Piney told them firmly, not wanting to lose faith in an old friend.

"No, but his dipshit kid sure as hell would." Jax argued back.

"It's just a matter of time before the feds connect you to Nate and come after you, too." Opie added.

"You know, Opie. I don't give a shit." Piney said, trying to show that he wasn't afraid. "How's that?"

"You know, well, I do. And Sophie sure as hell do. What do you think she would do if you were sent to prison?" Jax asked, knowing that Sophie was a sore subject for all three of them.

"Take him to the cabin." Jax told Opie and it made Piney shake his head.

"So, you're calling the shots now, huh?" Piney said.

"Till Clay gets out. The VP patch means this shit lands on my back." Jax told him and Piney didn't like this at all.

"The backs of children." Piney mumbled, before picking Chance up and leaving the young men standing there.

"He's just pissed at himself." Opie told Jax, trying to explain his father.

"Yeah, well. The old dude saved his ass in Khe Sanh, but the rest of that crew? Killed cops and innocents?" Jax told him.

"We'll find 'em." Opie said before leaving. This was going to end badly, Jax just had that feeling.

"You call Trammel?" Jax asked Bobby as he walked up to him.

"Trammel called us looking for Clay." Bobby answered. "No way we're getting those guns to Laroy with the feds there."

Jax couldn't agree more. There was no way they could bring the guns out now. Why did things have to be so fucking complicated all the time?

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

Being at Luann's porn studio was no big deal for me. I didn't really care about what she did for a living, but I had to admit, it was a little strange to have a girl talk, when there was naked people around, spanking each other and actually having sex right in front of us.

"Yeah, don't spank her. Let's rehearse one." I heard the director tell his actors. Gemma didn't seem to notice, she was all about talking shit about the girl that came into the lot today.

"Can you believe the balls on that little whore showing up at the goddamn clubhouse?" Gemma exclaimed, really looking for some sympathy.

"Clay couldn't have known." Luann said, not afraid of Gemma biting her head off.

"So, what?! The rules got broken. What happens on a run stays on a run. It does not show up and slap me in the goddamn face." Gemma hissed and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "That does not happen to me! She's so young."

"And dumb." I muttered under my breath.

"And before she knows it, she's gonna be old and wise like us." Luann added and I couldn't agree more. I watched as Gemma got her hotflashes and that could only mean one thing. Menopause… it was slowly creeping up on her.

"How am I supposed to handle this? I just want to rip his goddamn heart out." Gemma asked us in desperation.

"How the hell should I know?" I asked back. "I'm a walking mess as it is! I for sure can't handle myself."

"Estrotol. Solution 15." Luann shot in, stopping our rant. "It's magic. I'll get my guy to write you a prescription."

"I didn't come here for a diagnosis." Gemma argued.

"Sure, you did. You're lucky, baby. My walls went dry at 45." Luann said, and it freaked me out that in only 16 short years, I could be in her place. It made my biological clock run even faster.

"I'm only 51. I'm not ready for this." Gemma said, and I knew that this was hard for her.

"Everything will work out fine, Gemma. Please just listen to Luann. She could help you." I said, placing my hand on her shoulder, but Gemma only got angrier.

"Shut up, Sophie." She growled, before she started to pace around the room. Wow. So much fun talking to her when she's like this.

What a hag she can be. I don't really feel sorry for her anymore. Or maybe I do, I don't know.

* * *

I decided to leave my oh, so loving Mama Gem and decided to go to the hospital. I needed something else to do, and decided that spending time with Abel, would be the best thing for me. I haven't seen the boy since the day before yesterday, and in my mind, that was waaay too long without my precious baby boy.

Abel was alone in the room when I got there. He was never alone for long, but I liked the fact that it was only me and him in there. He was getting bigger and stronger each day that went by, and I couldn't wait to get him out of that incubator, and hold him for the very first time.

I picked up one of the books they kept in his room, and since he loves the sound of my voice, I figured it was the best thing I could do for him right now.

"Hey, baby boy. How are you today?" I asked softly as I sat down in the rocking chair next to him. Abel turned his head towards the sound of my voice, and it made my heart melt all over again. How could I not fall in love with this kid every single minute of the day?

"Are you ready to let me ready you a story?" I asked as if he could answer me. I just opened up the children's book, and started reading.

 ** _How much good inside a day?_**

 ** _Depends on how good you live 'em._**

 ** _How much love inside a friend?_**

 ** _Depends on how much you love 'em._**

* * *

I had this feeling that someone was watching me as I sat there reading, but I couldn't see anyone through the glass. It felt really weird and I felt this need to stay close to Abel for a while.

The door opened, and I dropped the book on the ground in fright.

"Damn, girl. What's gotten into you?" A familiar voice asked, and I could calm down a little.

"Hey, Rosie. Sorry about that. I'm just a little on edge today." I said, smiling at the kind woman.

"Why?" She asked, and I knew I could be honest with her.

"Well. This morning, Jax and I totally got into it, on the brink of having sex, but my damn father walked in and caught us. Jax jumped out of bed so quick, I thought I was never to see him again." I explained.

"Oh, you're never lucky when it comes to nailing your man." Rosie said, letting out a laugh. "Come on. I'm going on my break now, let us grab a cup of coffee, and you can tell me all about it."

I gave Rosie a smile and walked after her out of Abel's room. But I still had the feeling of someone watching me.

After my coffee with Rosie, I walked back to Abel's room, and I saw someone standing there. It was that fed from before. The one that helped the sheriff during the fundraiser. What the hell was he doing with Abel. I felt my motherly instinct take over and I marched into the room.

"What the fuck are you doing in here?" I asked dangerously. When he looked at me, he looked completely mental.

"Um, I was curious." Agent Kohn said, and I was about to blow a casket.

"Oh, I'm about to get real curious and introduce you to my fist. This incubation chamber is for medical personnel and family only. Now, get the fuck out before I call security." I growled at him.

"It still hurts me." He said, and I didn't understand what he was talking about, and I didn't really care. This guy was mixed up with Tara somehow, and I didn't want him anywhere near Abel.

"Be at Samcro in 45 minutes, if you want to see his future, or maybe even your future. I thought that maybe that picture I sent to you would keep you away from him, but I can tell it won't be enough." Kohn said before he left.

"What the hell is going on?" I muttered under my breath, making sure that Abel was okay.

I figured I should get back to Samcro, but then my phone rang.

"Gemma, now is so not the time for…"

"Yeah, well, tough luck, sweetheart. I'm about to be arrested."

What the hell is going on today?

"Fine, I'll be there in five."

I hung up the phone, and walked out of the hospital. This day can't get any weirder than it already is.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Jax had to do some research, so that he could figure out what the hell happened after he left Piney's friend this morning. He met up with Trammel, to figure what he had to say.

"You know, me and Saunde came up together. I've known him 15 years." Trammel said, talking about the fellow officer that got killed by those men.

"I'm sorry." Jax said, not knowing what else to say.

"Those were your AKs, weren't they?" Trammel asked.

"Yeah, I think so." Jax answered, figured it was no point in lying.

"Goddamn it, Jax." Trammel exclaimed.

"Feds picked up Clay. Traced a call from one of the shooters' cell phones back to TM." Jax told him. "Need you to find out how real it is, who else they have. Can't let them find these guys."

"Your guns kill a friend of mine and now you are tasking me to protect the shooters?" Trammel asked appalled.

"It's not about protecting them. It's about getting to them first. Gotta get Clay clear of this shit." Jax said, and Trammel was getting fed up.

"I was supposed to help you get your guns to the ghetto and run a little interference. I didn't sign on for burnt bodies - Dead sheriffs." Trammel argued.

"I know."

"This is over."

"Hey, Trammel, it's too late for 'over', man. You know all about us, and we know all about you. Look, only way this relationship works is two of us together or one of us dead. I'll be waiting for your call." Jax told him, before leaving him behind.

* * *

When Jax got back to TM, he had Juice dig up something on Meineke, but it seemed that it wouldn't be that easy.

"Nothing's coming up under Meineke other than discount mufflers." Juice explained. Jax wanted to swear, but was distracted when he saw Chance clawing at his leg.

"What the hell? Why is he here? I thought you would go with Sophie's old man to the cabin." Jax said, mostly to the dog. That's when he saw Piney walked towards him. "What's going on? Thought I told you to go underground."

"Nate, reached out. They're in some survivalist bunker outside of Woodbridge Forest." Piney told him.

"Great. You gotta set up a meet." Jax told him.

"Well… And then what happens?" Piney asked, but he already knew the answer.

"They killed three people in cold blood, and there's a straight line back to this club. What the hell you think happens, Piney?" Jax argued with him, as Bobby and Chibs entered the club.

"I just talked to Trammel. The feds got a warrant to rip this place up." Bobby told them and that's not something they needed right now.

"Shit! Cabin now." Jax told Piney, making the older man angry.

"Who the hell do you think you're talking to?" Piney roared, making Chance bark his little head off.

"Relax, relax, relax! All right, get out of here." Opie ordered his dad, and he huffed in response, but walked away, with Chance on his heels.

As Piney drove off, the others tried to figure out what to do with the guns.

"You'll never be able to get these guns out of here." Juice said, not seeing a way out of this.

"Yeah, well, the feds open up them oil barrels, we all got a new charter: Stockton State Prison." Bobby said, not wanting to go back to prison.

"Yeah, go meet with Laroy. Pick up our money. Tell him he'll have his guns before the end of the day." Jax ordered him.

"You gonna Houdini this stuff out of here, brother?" Chibs asked his VP.

"I'll figure it out." Jax said, trying to sound sure of himself.

* * *

The time was beginning to run out for Jax, and he didn't know what to do. He couldn't call Sophie, because it was not safe to drag her into this right now. He paced around on the roof, trying to come up with anything. The only thing he could think of right now, was reading his father's journal.

 ** _The older I get, the more I realized that age doesn't bring wisdom._**

 ** _It only brings weary I'm not anyhow smarter than I was 30 years ago, I've just grown too tired to joggle the lies and hide the fears._**

 ** _Self-awareness doesn't reveal my indiscretions._**

 ** _Exhaustion does._**

A loud noise from the lot ripped Jax away from his reading, and he saw the septic guys working on their sewer system, and he suddenly had an idea that could actually work.

He brought his guys together, and took the guns out of the barrels as Bobby came back.

"Well, Niners do not want the AKs." Bobby told them.

"What?" Jax exclaimed.

"Nobody's gonna touch them, not after what went down this morning." Chibs added.

"Man. We'll worry about a buyer later. Right now, it's all about the shit." Jax said, and opened the doors to the garage, revealing his big master plan. No one would check the septic tank.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I parked my car at the sheriff's office, at the same time as the officer escorted Gemma out of the police car.

"What the hell did you do, Gemma?" I asked, but she didn't say anything only stared right ahead, and I couldn't help but think how immature she was behaving. Wasn't she supposed to be the oldest of us?

I followed Gemma, wanting to know what to do next, when we both saw Clay sitting in one of the interrogation rooms.

"What's he doing here?" Gemma asked the officer.

"The feds are grilling him." The officer answered and I knew this would end badly, especially, when the door opened, revealing Clay.

"What the hell did you do?!" Clay yelled, making me embarrassed.

"Same thing you did. nailed some little tart from Nevada!" Gemma yelled back. Wow, I've never been prouder of them in my life.

"Like I don't have enough shit oozing out of my ears! You got to go and do this!" Clay kept on yelling, and I was this close to yell at the both of them.

"Should've thought of that before your dick went on a cheerleader hunt!"

"I didn't tell her to come here!"

"But she's here!"

"Well, that's not my fault!"

"And it's not my pussy!"

"Would the two of you please shut up! It's embarrassing listening to the two of you right now. Please take them to separate rooms." I asked both Hale and the other officer. A woman looked at the two of them and she gave me the creeps. I practically growled at her for even looking my way, before I walked after Gemma, hearing the woman opening her mouth.

"And that's why I'm single." She said, and I could think of different reasons to why she was single, but I decided against telling that to her.

* * *

They put Gemma in one of the cells in the back, and because Unser loved me, he let me sit there with her, so she wasn't alone.

"You hungry?" I asked, looking around in my purse for something for her to eat.

"I'll take a smoke." Gemma answered, and I gave her one, taking one for myself.

"Last time I was in here, I was 18 years old." Gemma told me, and I couldn't see her being in here.

"What'd they get you for?" I asked with humor in my voice. I would so love to hear this story.

"Disorderly conduct. I was piss-drunk. Think there might have been an, an assault charge involved, too." Gemma said honestly, and I couldn't help but laugh.

"That's the Gemma I know." I said, trying to lighten the mood.

"What the hell happened, Gemma? I've never seen you like this before." I asked her, feeling worried about her.

"Well, Sophie. You'll understand it someday. I would like to see you sit idly by, letting some whore taking your man." Gemma told me.

"Someone already did try that, remember? I have the picture to prove it. "But I guess you're right. What happens on a run, stays on a run. Maybe I overreacted about the whole thing. Expecting too much.

"Don't beat yourself up about that, Sophie. You and Jax… you're a completely different story. You're nothing like the rest of us." Gemma said, and I looked at her, seeing the good old Gemma like I remembered her. "You shouldn't take any shit from my son. Because you're the only one in this family that don't deserve being treated like crap."

"Yeah, but sometimes, it doesn't feel like it." I said absentmindedly. "Did I tell you about this morning? Jax and I was about to get hot and heavy, and my father walked through the door. Jax almost pissed himself. It was so funny to watch."

Gemma couldn't help but laugh. It was nice sitting here, talking just the two of us. If only we didn't have a bar between us, but hey… maybe this is exactly what we needed.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

The septic tank seemed to work, and the search the feds did, came up empty. They had nothing on them what so ever, so they were off the hook, and they could plan what to do next with their guns, without thinking about ATF breathing down their necks. Jax and Bobby rode their bikes up to the cabin to tell Opie and Piney the news, and they had news themselves.

"Nate called. Wants to make a deal on the rest of those AK's." Piney told them.

"Russell knows nobody will touch them. Ten grands for all 36." Opie added, grabbing a smoke.

"Shit. Those guns are worth ten times that." Bobby told Jax, not liking this at all.

"All right, set it up. Me and Ope will make the run." Jax ordered, but Piney wasn't agreeing on that.

"No, you can't go without me. They won't trust you." Piney told him, thinking about what it would do to Sophie if something bad happened to Jax.

"You okay tying up this loose end?" Jax asked him.

"You know, you don't have to ask me that." Piney responded, and they both knew what to do.

"All right." Jax finally agreed.

"Good. Now get home, and treat my daughter right. She called me earlier, and I think she misses you. But please don't tell me what you did to her." Piney said, making everyone laugh, and Jax knew he was right. He was tired as fuck, and he wanted nothing more than to be with his woman. His Old Lady.

"See you guys later." Jax said, and rode off on his bike.

* * *

 **Sophie's P.o.v**

 _ **From here on out, it gets rather steamy.**_

I had just stopped my car in my driveway, and I was rather tired after spending hours at the police station, talking to Gemma, and now, I just wanted to go to bed and not think about anything else.

I leaned my head against the steering wheel, feeling deadly tired, and I was glad that my dad had taken Chance with him to the cabin, because honestly, I did so not want to go out for a walk so he could take a piss right now.

I was about to unlock my door, when I heard the familiar sound of Jax's bike. I turned around, and it felt good that he was here. I wanted him to stay close tonight. Especially after meeting that creepy guy in Abel's room this afternoon. But I didn't want to bother Jax with that right now.

"Hey." I said as he took off his helmet, and walked over to me. "You won't believe the day I've had…."

He cut me off before I could even comprehend what was happening, and I was once again half-drunk with his kisses. He kissed me as if I was his last meal, and I could feel the tension building up between us. He kissed me fiercely sucking and biting my tongue and lips, and I had to pry him away, to be able to breathe. I looked into those beautiful eyes of his, and I wanted nothing more than for him to take me right now.

"Take me inside." I barely managed to whisper. Jax only nodded, and practically threw me inside, before locking the door behind us. Within seconds, he had me pinned up against the wall, taking control of the kiss once again. He tried to cover every inch of my skin all at once, and my mind went completely blank. I wanted to say something, but I couldn't remember what it was.

My heart was pounding the whole time, but I didn't care anymore. I wanted to take this step with him. I needed him, more than I needed oxygen. He worked his tongue over my skin, making me moan loudly, and I could feel him smirking. He kissed me hard, and my mind went completely blank again.

When I realized that he was pulling his lips away, I started to moan in protest, but that was until I understood that he would move down to my now bra covered chest. Where the hell did my shirt walk off to? That's not the part to think about now, stupid!

Somewhere in the middle of all the groping and the kissing, my bra disappeared to. His long, slender fingers gripped my sensitive breasts, massaging them roughly, before his hot kisses took their place. I threw my head back against the wall and I almost cried from the pleasure of his mouth suckling hard. I shoved my hands into his blonde hair, grabbing large handfuls and squeezing, making him groan against one of my painfully harden nipples. His hot tongue flickered repeatedly, nipping at it with his teeth before moving even lower.

Jax looked up at me with those beautiful eyes of his before dropping to his knees, bringing my pants and panties in one swift motion, making me step out of them, staring at me, hypnotized.

I felt the urge to squirm under his gaze, because it was so intimidating, having someone giving me that close attention below the waist. But Jax wouldn't let me cover myself. Instead, he brought my hands up, kissing them lovingly, reassuring me that everything was fine before placing them on the back of his head, and I knew instinctively, to grab onto his hair again. He smiled at me, licking his lips, and reach behind me to keep steady. I felt his tongue sweep across my wet sex in broad strokes and I just couldn't keep myself from crying out in pleasure anymore.

"Holy fuck!" I screamed, and I could tell Jax felt proud of himself. My exclamation just drove him on. By the time he latched onto my swollen clit, and begun sucking again, I was about to go insane. Without any warning what so ever, I burst into the biggest orgasm I've ever had. I swear, I saw fireworks, stars, I discovered a fucking new planet. Jax kept his grip on me, because he was afraid that I would collapse from the intensity of it all. I was shaking all over, and I couldn't for the life of me, remember when this felt so good.

* * *

He released me after a few minutes, only to pick me up again, making me wrap my legs around his waist. I held onto him as best as I could, occupying his mouth with kisses, so the poor man stumbled a little through the hallway. He managed to find his way into my bedroom, and my king-size bed. He knelt on the edge of the bed and leaned over me, and the way he looked at me, made me feel even more loved than ever before. I looked up at him with adoration, and I never wanted this moment to end. I never wanted to let him go.

"I love you." I whispered, before I grabbed him by the neck, pulling him down to me. Then, I kissed him as passionately as I could muster, and it only grew more and more frantic. It took me a few seconds to figure out that I was completely naked, while Jax still had his clothes on. I slid my hands under his cut and slid it slowly down his arms, feeling my heart beating out of control. Jax let me work at my own speed, needing me to feel comfortable with myself, and him. We haven't been intimate like this since we were 14 and 15. And that was just awkward. I pushed him away a little, so I could free him from his shirt, and just as quick as I pulled it over his head, he reconnected our lips, making my toes curl. I tossed the shirt somewhere in the room, not really caring about it. The moment my hands started to slip between our wanting bodies, and touched his button fly, Jax's hands shoved mine away in desperation to get as close to me as possible. He ripped it off in no time, and settled between my legs again. Being in this position, made me as vulnerable as I could ever be, and Jax noticed, the lust in his eyes is still there, but also the love we feel for each other is there.

He traced his fingers down my cheek and kissed me as softly as he possibly could. Just to make sure I was okay.

"I can't believe you're back here with me again." Jax whispered, before he penetrated my body, sinking deeper, inch by solid inch. I gasped at the feel of him inside me, and it was too much for Jax. He started panting like crazy, starting to shake with anticipation.

"God, you're tight. Feel so good." Jax told me with a groan. I kissed him, panting just as bad as him. That seemed to do the trick, and he started moving back, grinding against a place I had never been stimulated before.

"Oh, shit!" I cried out, and it seemed to surprise him more than he thought. He shifted his hips and rubbed firmly against that bundle of nerves, making me shake uncontrollably. I was convulsing around him and it made him smirk.

"Is that your spot, baby?" Jax asked, but I couldn't form any word to come out of my mouth. So, I only nodded. He took that as a good to go, and shoved into me harder, making sure to drag his thick tip along that place each time he passed it.

I was completely lost: lost in the moment, lost in us, lost in Jax's scent that was pure sex. When I started matching his rhythmic movements, he grunted loudly and rolled over, pulling me on top of him. I was still a little shy, and he knew it, and kept me as close to his body as possible. Suddenly, he coaxed me back slightly, and I felt the deeper angle my position created. I surprised myself in the throes of passion, and raised up on my knee, leaning back on his thighs and arching my back, riding him into oblivion.

Jax took a sharp intake of breath, holding onto my hips, pulling me down on his shaft, harder with each thrust, and I was wondering how the fuck I would keep my sanity while I fucked a god.

I felt myself started shaking, and I could feel myself growing wetter around him. The room flooded with our mixed scents, the arousal in the air, could almost be touched. Jax let out a growl from deep within his chest, and sat up quickly, wrapping himself around me like a cocoon. The newest position felt even more intensive, and I shuttered all around him. He rubbed against me in a way I've never experienced before, and I came undone, clamping down on him, screaming at the top of my lungs. Jax begun bucking his hips furiously, not being able to hold on anymore. He roared as he exploded deep inside me, allowing me to milk him dry. We collapsed together on the bed, completely drained. We laid there, trying to catch our breaths. This is the moment I've been waiting for, for what seems like forever.

Jax pulled me with him, as he turned us over, leaving him on top. He looked down at me, and it felt so good, lying there in his arms. He let his head fall into my neck, and I kissed his forehead.

* * *

"Holy Shit! That was amazing." Jax said into the crook of my neck.

"It really was." I managed to breath out, running my hand through his hair. Jax looked down at me, kissing me softly, before rolling over, bringing me to lay on his chest. I snuggled into his chest, making him tighten his grip on me.

I didn't actually know what to say to him, he practically jumped me like a beast, but I loved him. Was it good enough for him? Did I do it right?

All these thoughts went through my head, making myself questioning everything, and Jax could sense it.

"Hey look at me." He said softly, tilting my head up to his.

"You were incredible. I've never experienced that with someone before." Jax told me, rubbing soothing circles on my arms and back. I lifted myself up a little, kissing him. I never wanted to let him go. Jax responded to my kiss, and roll us over, throwing ourselves off into another round of hot and heavy sex.

* * *

The next morning, I woke up to someone breathing down my neck. My eyes popped open when I remembered what I did last night. Jax and I kept going until the early hours of the morning, not being able to keep our hands off each other. I didn't want to move from him, and as cliché as it sounds, I never want to leave this bed.

I felt a kiss being pressed against my neck, and I turned around to look into those beautiful eyes of his. I loved him so much. God, how much I loved this man. How did I get so lucky?

"Good morning beautiful." Jax said with that sexy, sleepy voice of his.

"Good morning, handsome." I said, giving him a kiss.

"I'm sorry, but I have to get going soon. I'm meeting your old man and your brother in 2 hours for a drop off." Jax told me, and I let out a sigh.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"Not too far away from the cabin. Why?" Jax asked suspicious.

"Nothing. I want to come with you." I said, not really asking for permission.

"Absolutely not." Jax argued.

"Well, this is Nate we're talking about, right?" I asked him.

"Yes, but that doesn't change anything." Jax told me.

"I don't care. I want to see the man that screw my dad over. The one that supposedly was his best friend. I want to be there when it happens." I argued and Jax knew that I wouldn't let this go.

"Fine. But stay close to me at all times. Do not go running off on your own, you got that?" Jax told me, giving in on my demands.

"I promise. Not that I want to be that far away from you anyway." I said, knowing it was cheesy.

"What do you say to a shower before we head out." I suggested as I jumped out of bed stark naked. Jax didn't need much time to think and hauled me over his shoulder, and ran towards my bathroom. Damn. This man would be the death of me. Sexually.

* * *

After spending a long time in the shower, Jax and I took his bike up to the cabin, where we would meet my dad and Opie. My dad would just look at me, and he knew that I finally got some, and he patted me on the back, telling me how proud he was of me.

He didn't like it that I was joining them, but I didn't care. I was out of harm's way, and I there's no way they would go alone.

We arrived at the destination, Jax wrapping his arm around me, protectively. We stood there, letting my dad and brother make the deal. One of Nate's men stood there with binoculars, not believing us when we said we weren't followed. Jax was fed up with him.

"We're not idiots. We weren't followed." Jax told him and the guy gave him a look, telling us that he didn't really believe him.

"That smells like shit." Nate exclaimed, gesturing to the guns.

"Long story." Opie said, and I needed to get Jax to tell me how that happened.

They're all here. Three dozen. Cut open the bags and you can check for yourself if you like." My dad said, and I got the feeling that there's something more hiding in those bags. That obnoxious man from before, handed the envelope of cash rather harsh to Jax, and I wanted to rip his head off for being such and ass.

"Thanks." He said nonchalantly.

"Yeah." Jax said, holding me back with his other arm.

"Sorry about how this went down. I wanted to tell you, but Russ thought it best not to." Nate told my dad, and I could tell that this was hard for him.

"That Russ, he always was a big thinker."

"He's a good kid, just a little nervous. Believes in the cause." Nate told him.

"And this is your retirement plan? Hiding out in some bunker? You got anybody up there with you? Family, women, kids?" Dad asked him.

"No. Frank and Russ' boys. We're gonna lie low till the heat dies down. We got some big boy waiting for us in Mexico." Nate answered.

"Mexico. Gonna be running this revolution from Acapulco?" Dad said, with a smile on his face.

"Yeah."

"You, take care of yourself, friend." Dad told him, as Nate and the others walked away.

Opie, Jax and I looked at my dad, hoping everything was fine with him.

"Well, there ain't no innocents with 'em." Dad said, before he and Opie got into the truck, and Jax and I jumped on his bike.

I knew that something was coming, but I wasn't prepared for the huge explosion behind us. I understood that it was the only way to stop this, and that's what my dad meant when he said that there wasn't any innocents with them. And it hurt my dad to see Nate go. But that's how it is. Jax and I rode up to the truck, as my dad rolled down the window.

"All this shit landed on your back. Handled it pretty damn good, kid." Dad told him, and it made me happy that he was happy.

"Thanks, old man." Jax said with a smile.

"Take care of yourself, sweetheart." Dad said to me, and I also had a huge smile on my face.

"Thanks, dad. I love you." I said, meaning every word.

"Yeah, I love you too, kiddo." Dad said before we rode off together. I loved feeling the wind blowing in my face, and I loved how everything worked out well in the end. I felt better when it came to Jax and me right now, and I felt we had a deeper connection that before. I just needed to think positive, and don't doubt myself when it comes to that.

* * *

When we got back into town, I told Jax to drop me off at the Police station. I wanted to be there when they let Gemma out of jail, and Jax wanted to go see the kid. Not that I didn't want to, but Gemma would kill me for sure, if she knew that I ditched seeing her getting out of the slammer. Jax kissed me goodbye at the same time as Clay rode up on his Harley.

"Hey. Come to bring home the wife?" I asked, as he sat down next to me.

"Yeah, unless she cuts my balls off and feed them to me." Clay said, grabbing a smoke.

"Yeah, she can be a hard one. But hey, take care of her please. She needs you, Clay." I said softly, hoping he wouldn't be offended or anything.

"Yeah, I will, kiddo. And thank you, Sophie." Clay said and he never says thank you to me.

"For what?" I asked.

"For taking such good care of my Old Lady when I screwed things up the way I did." Clay answered, and I couldn't help but smile.

"You're welcome, Clay. I would do anything for that woman, and you know it." I told him, and we sat there in silence, waiting for the Samcro-queen to come out the door. About 15 minutes later, the door to the sheriff's office opened, and Gemma walked outside. I felt myself exhale, and a shitload off my shoulders.

"You been waiting long?" Gemma asked Clay as she kissed my cheek and gave me a hug.

"All my life, baby." Clay said, finally getting some lip action from his loving wife. Clay grabbed Gemma's hand, ready to go, when we saw someone coming. I figured it was the bitch from before. The one Clay hooked up with in Nevada.

"Jesus. This stupid bitch." Clay exclaimed under his breath. "I'm sorry."

"No, no, I got it." Gemma assured him, and I couldn't help myself.

"No skateboards." I said, gaining a smirk and an annoyed smile at the same time.

"Promise." Gemma said, approaching the young girl.

"I just want to say I'm sorry if I caused any problems." The girl said, and she sounded sorry.

I didn't want to listen to their conversation, so I grabbed Gemma's keys, and told Clay that I would bring her car back to TM, and that I would meet them there.

I walked over to the car, as I heard footsteps behind me. I looked up and saw that same girl walking up to me.

"What do you want?" I barked at her. I know, not very nice.

"You're Sophie Winston, right?" She asked and I rolled my eyes at her. I huffed as a response, and got into the car. "I'm Cherry. And I just wanted to say it's an honor to meet you. All the guys in Nevada always talks about you, and what kind of person you are. Kip talked so warmly about you, and how you two became friends so quickly."

I am sure that she's a nice girl at heart, but I really didn't have the time for her right now.

"Why the hell are you here?" I asked impatiently.

"You and Jax Teller. What you have, I want that." Cherry said, and I started to think about the way Kip acted when he saw her in the lot.

"The prospect?" I asked and she actually started blushing.

"Yeah… He's the right one." She answered and I wanted to believe her.

"What if that doesn't hook up? The others want a taste?" I asked, knowing how ruthless those guys can be.

"Then I'm gone. I'm not here for anyone else." Cherry said, standing her ground.

"You so much as flash a pretty grin at Jax, or Clay or any other than Kip, I will jam my fist so far up your bony ass, your cup size will double." I warned her, knowing that Gemma would've been proud of me for saying so.

"Is that how your rack got to be that size?" Cherry shot back, and I couldn't help but laugh at that statement.

"Yeah, Mama Gem did it, a long time ago." I joked back, and Cherry started laughing.

"Come on. Do you need a ride somewhere?" I asked, surprising myself.

"Yeah, sure." Cherry smiled as much as she could without hurting. That nose of hers didn't look so good.

I drove off towards TM with Cherry by my side. I guessed that she would want to see Kip again, so I saw no harm in bringing her there. As we turned on the street, I saw Jax riding the other way, and when I saw who was on the back, my insides twisted.

Tara. Why the hell would he give her a ride home? I know I should trust him, but when it comes to Tara, I know that if she decides to hook her claws into him, I fear that he will turn around completely, and leave me hanging, because even though he says that he loves me, I'm not sure what he would do if Tara wanted him back.

* * *

 **There it is!**

 **What did you think. Do you want more steamy scenes or not? I'm all for it, but it's up to you readers if you want to read more about the naughtiness of Jax and Sophie.**

 **I promise I'll do my best to update more often, but I can't promise anything.**

 **Until next time xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***peace486: thank you so much! I love Chance too, and that he's already a member of the club, sleeping on Tig's Harley of all things.**

 ***Emmettluver2010: I am trying to work something out about her love life, but I'm not sure how to work it out just yet. The mother from hell will come out of hiding soon. It will be so much fun! It will mess things up for sure. Or at least, I'm planning on it.**

 ***Momoftwins1970: Haha! I have always planned on pairing Kyle and Sophie. It would be something people didn't expect, and I'm glad you thought it was good. Hope you like this chapter as well.**

 ***Jeffyzfavoriteskittle27: Thank you so much. Sorry for the wait, though. For the time being, Jax has his head out of his ass, but a lot more can still happen.**

 ***india-guest: Thank you :)**


	10. Old Bones

Hello **again! I know I used a long time updating this story, and I give you a long chapter as a sorry for using so much time. It's flu-season, and I've been sick for a few days, and then I had a little time to update.**

 **Read, review and enjoy this chapter. A fair warning: this chapter is a roller coaster.**

 _ **I do not own "SOA" only my oc.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

Jax was riding his bike towards Tara's home, what he didn't see, was his mother's car, driving the other way. It felt strange, having Tara wrapped around him like this. The last time they did this, he was nineteen, and had no idea she would leave him that very night. And he felt conflicted by having her this close to him again.

Jax stopped his bike in the driveway of her house.

"Appreciate the lift." Tara said, feeling a little better with Jax close by.

"No problem. Where's the Cutlass?" Jax asked, looking around.

"Oh, it's at the hospital." Tara answered quickly.

"Still not running right?"

"It's running okay. This worry I'm getting here that have anything to do with that car that's been following us? The compact parked halfway down the block." Jax said, not beating around the bush. Tara freaked out and ran for her door.

"Tara! What the hell's going on?" Jax asked, catching up with her.

"That A.T.F. Agent that's been looking into you guys… I think he's here for me." Tara told him.

"What are you talking about?" Jax asked her.

"I was with him in Chicago. It got violent. I tried to end it. He started stalking me." Tara said, and for some reason, Jax wanted to rip this guy's head off, and protect Tara from anything bad. And what made matters worse, he had been snooping around Sophie, and he sure as hell, didn't like that.

"Jax. Don't. He's dangerous." Tara argued when Jax started to approach Kohn's car.

"Go back inside, Tara. Lock the door." Jax demanded, feeling outraged about how stupid she was. Jax reached Kohn's car, and pulled out his knife. He plunged it into the radiator, damaging his car, and it made Kohn see red.

"Vandalism. Deadly weapon. That's six months in County, asshole." Kohn told him, getting out of his car.

"Violating a restraining order. You'll be in the cell next to me. They teach you how to suck a dick in A.T.F. School?" Jax shot back at him.

"Badass biker."

"You guys gave it your best shot. You got nothing on Sam Crow." Jax told him. "And you harassing Tara, that ends here or next time it won't be a piece-of-shit car I'm draining fluid from."

"You threatening a federal agent?" Kohn asked, and Jax only smiled.

"I'm threatening you. Go away. It's my last warning." Jax said, staring to walk away.

"Wow, Jax. You're really concerned about Tara's wellbeing. What would your old lady have to say about that? I bet she would go all kinds of crazy, knowing her man is so caught up in his ex-girlfriend's business." Kohn shot back at him, and Jax wanted nothing more than to kill the man. But he knew that Kohn could turn his world upside down without even trying.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I drove Gemma's car into the lot at TM only a few minutes after Gemma and Clay. Cherry jumped out of the car, making her way over to Kip, and I walked into the clubhouse. Jax told me that the feds were here last night, tearing the clubhouse apart. I knew that he wouldn't want anyone else to clean his room. And let's face it, I needed to do something to stop thinking about Jax giving Tara a ride home. I didn't want to obsess over it, but it was hard.

As I crossed the lot, Tig came out of the garage.

"Hey, Princess!" He yelled.

"Hey, Tiggy!" I called back, which resulted in rounds of barking coming from within the garage. Chance came running out at the sound of my voice, wanting to see his mama.

"Hi, baby!" I said with excitement, crouching down on the ground. When Chance leaped into my arms, it made me feel so much better.

"Let's go clean up Jax's room, yes?" I said, picking him up. Great, I'm talking to a dog.

I walked into Jax's room, and it was a complete mess. This seemed more personal than a police raid. What the hell happened last night?

I sighed, placing Chance on his bed, and started cleaning the room. I noticed that a lot of pictures of me was missing and I couldn't even understand why. Why would they takep pictures of me?

I tried to shake my head from those thoughts, and continued my work.

The door opened, and Gemma stepped inside.

"Hey, Mama Gem." I said, pushing the cabinet back into its place.

"Hey, Princess. What the hell happened here?" Gemma asked, looking around.

"It's the raid from last night. They tore Jax's room apart." I answered.

"Shit!" She exclaimed. "But, it's not much different from when that boy grew up."

"Yeah, but I kinda like him, though." I said, thinking about what happened last night, and my dreamy look, did not go unnoticed by the Samcro queen.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Gemma asked. "Wait, I know that look… you got laid last night."

I didn't answer her, but blushed heavily.

"Well, halle-fucking-lujah! It's about time, sweetheart." Gemma said, and she looked so happy. "How do you feel?"

"I feel wonderful." I told her honestly, but I knew that she sensed the 'but'.

"But, what?" Gemma pressed on.

"I saw Jax give Tara a ride home just now. She probably had a night shift, and he offered. I know I shouldn't read too much into it. But you know how insecure I get when it comes to her." I answered, and Gemma could see that sometimes, I'm still that fourteen-year-old girl.

Gemma looked at me, and then rolled her eyes.

"Then you need to grow a set, and tell that bitch who's the main bitch when it comes to my son." Gemma told me. "I love you, Sophie. But you need to stake your claim, or else you'll never survive in this world."

I knew that Gemma was right, and that I had to show Tara who's boss, or I'm going to lose Jax all together, and I don't want that. I gave Gemma a smile before she headed out of the room. I looked over at Chance, and he looked at me with those puppy eyes of his.

"There's no way out of this, is there?" I asked him. Chance only huffed in response, and it made me roll my eyes. Chance was taking Gemma's side in this, and let's face it… he is a smart dog.

I managed to get Jax's room as clean as possible, but I won't tell you how disturbing it is to find old panties from Jax's earlier conquests under the bed. I threw them away, hoping that I would never have to clean that up again.

* * *

I took out the trash, seeing some of the sons standing at the boxing ring. Chibs, Bobby and Tig stood there, watching as Kip fought against Lowell. This could be interesting.

I walked over to Chibs, and he put his arm around my shoulder.

"Hi, there, lassie. How are ye?" Chibs asked, kissing me cheek.

"Oh, you know… as good as it gets." I said with a sigh, grabbing his cigarette.

"That's good to know. I wouldn't want it any other way." Chibs told me, bringing me a little closer to him.

"Half-Sack, boombaye! Get in there, kid!" Chibs yelled at Kip, urging him on. He was a real fighting machine. "Hands up, Lowell."

"Keep your hands up, Lowell." I said, trying to show my friend some support. But let's face it, Kip was stronger than him.

"Now you're getting cocky. Anyone can beat up a junkie, prospect. It doesn't mean shit." Chibs said, and I elbowed him in the ribs. He was not allowed to talk about Lowell like that. Cherry was hanging around Kip like a teenager in love and I found it rather cute.

"Where did you learn how to fight like this?" Cherry asked him.

"You know, I was junior lightweight champion. Armed Forces boxing competition." Kip answered,

"Ooh, that's so hot."

I walked back to Tig and Bobby along with Chibs, as Clay came out of the office.

"Things all better with the little missus now?" Tig asked, knowing that Gemma was pissed at him.

"My balls are still attached, thanks to Sophie. I don't know what she was talking to Gemma about all those hours in there, but she did something, all right." Clay answered.

"What can I say? I speak fluent bitch." I said with a shrug.

"Shit, Lowell. Get out of there. Whose idea was this?" Clay asked when he saw that Kip was kicking his ass.

"Tig's."

"Bobby's." the two of them said at the same time, blaming it on each other.

"I don't mind it, Clay. I'm just helping the Half-Sack train." Lowell said, and I found it very cute.

"Yeah, well, you killed enough brain cells. Come on. Come on. Back to work." Clay said, and we all knew that it was over.

"Okay. Thanks." Lowell replied, secretly glad that it was over.

"How's he doing?" Clay asked.

"Well, the latest round of rehab seems to be sticking." I said, feeling confident. I was the one that brought him to rehab the last time, because he called me, freaking out about not being able to quit.

"Yeah, and he hasn't missed any work." Tig added.

"If I could get A.A. to kick up a vig, Lowell could make us all rich." Clay told us.

"He's always been a freak." Bobby added, and I didn't like it when they talked about him like this. "Damn good mechanic though. I guess you taught him right."

Right then, Jax pulled into the lot, and I suddenly felt uneasy. Should I tell him that I saw him on the road with Tara, or should I just let it go?

"How's Sugar Ray One Nut looking?" Jax asked, moving towards us.

"He's working fast. Got a great right hook." Chibs answered, as Jax brought me closer to him. It made me melt, and almost forget the things I was worrying about. Almost.

"Hey, are you okay, darling?" Jax asked me, when he noticed how quiet I was.

"Yeah, I'm just going to see if Lowell need some tending after the fight. I'll talk to you later." I answered and got away from his hold. He was about to kiss me, but I just walked away. I know I'm acting like a nutcase, and I feel so insecure, but I didn't know what happened with Tara and him. He was gone a long time.

I walked into the garage, only to find Lowell drying some blood off his face.

"Hey, Lowell." I said, with a smile.

"Hey Sophie." He answered, walking towards me.

"Kip got you good, huh?" I said, looking at the gash he had over his left eye.

"Oh, this? Nah, it's nothing." Lowell brushed off.

"Let me be the judge of that. Sit down, and let me take a look." I ordered, taking my bag of medical supplies out.

"All right. Thanks, Sophie." Lowell said, sitting down on one of the chairs.

It didn't look deep, but I didn't want it to get infected.

"You're doing a great job, Lowell. I'm so proud of you." I told him, cleaning his wound.

"Thanks, Sophie. It means a lot to hear you say that." Lowell told me. "All I do, I do for my son, you know."

"I know. I'm just proud of you, all together." I said with a smile. Lowell and I had known each other for years, and he like me, had a deadbeat parent. He had his father, and I had my mother.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

"I'll talk to you later…" Sophie said, and walked away from Jax. He didn't like it, and something was bothering her.

"What the hell was that all about?" Tig asked, raising his eyebrow at his VP.

"The hell if I know." Jax shrugged off. Trying to mask the fact that it was unsettling for him.

"How much money gets thrown around at these bare-fist things?" Clay asked.

"The purse is okay, but it's the betting that's gone crazy." Tig answered. "I know a couple of guys last year who made six figures each."

"Really?"

"The prospect can knock any one of those lightweights out, any day of the week." Chibs told them.

"Absolutely."

"What'd we pull together for McKeevy?" Clay asked.

"A hundred and twenty. You ain't thinking about betting on the prospect." Bobby asked, looking over at half-sack and his girl.

"If Half-Sack takes his first five fights and looks strong going into the finish we control how it ends, it could be a huge payday." Tig told them, knowing first hand that the kid is smart.

"What do you think?" Clay asked Jax.

"I don't know. But I do know there's no way we're raising 80 grand in the next four days so it might be our only shot." Jax answered, knowing they would need this money badly.

"I'm in." Clay said, and the others agreed.

"Take 50 grand. I wanna see it triple." Clay said before turning to Chibs.

"You're gonna train him. No booze. No weed. No pussy."

"That include the Nevada sweetbutt? Till I'm up a hundred-K, that little cherry tart can cool on the counter." Clay said without giving Cherry a second glance."Hey, Bobby. Do me a favor. Push up on that thing, will ya?"

"Really? Halfy-Sack is all about that now."

"Really. Well, I wanna see if she's all about him. And go at it hard." Clay told him.

"I ain't mad at that." Bobby said, agreeing to it.

"Half-Sack's gonna lose his mind." Jax said with a chuckle.

"Well, that kind of anger we can really use."

"Hey, and call Unser. See if he wants in on some of this fight action." Clay told them.

"Clay, he's out on the job. Water and Power dug up some old bones this morning." Jax told him.

"Where?" He asked quickly.

"Out on 44." Jax answered, but Clay didn't reply to that at all, he just moved away from him, not saying anything at all.

"What?"

"I don't know." Tig said quickly, and somehow, Jax doubted that to be true. Clay, Jax and Tig drove their bikes to the place, and they saw the police wheeling away bodies.

"Wheeling out two bodies." Jax muttered under his voice.

"There should be three." Tig told him.

"I'm afraid to ask." Jax replied.

"Don't be. There it is." Tig said, pointing at the last one.

"Is this us?" Jax asked.

"Yeah." Clay said without thinking twice about it. No point in lying.

"Aw, shit."

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

"There. All done." I said, putting the band aid on Lowell's forehead.

"You're a good woman, Sophie. Never change." Lowell said, and it felt nice to help him.

"Daddy!" We heard someone yell, and Lowell's son came running through the garage.

"Hey, buddy!" Lowell exclaimed, and he seemed so happy about his kid being here.

"I got a knew firetruck today." Moby told his father.

"You did? Wow, you're the luckiest guy ever." Lowell told him and I couldn't help but smile. It made me miss Abel.

"Hi, Moby." I said, making the boy look right at me.

"Hi…" He said a little shy.

"Moby, this is Sophie. She's a nice person." Lowell told him, and it warmed my heart.

"Are you the one that helped my daddy?" Moby asked, and I knew he was talking about the time I helped Lowell getting to rehab.

"Yes, I am." I answered with a smile.

"Thank you." He said slowly, and it melted my heart even more.

"You're welcome, Moby." I said, and I meant it. If he needed me again, I would do it in a heartbeat.

I gathered up my things, getting ready to leave Lowell to his work, when I gave Moby a card with my name and number on it.

"If you ever need me, you call me, all right? No matter if it's day or night." I whispered. "It's our secret."

I walked out of the garage, as Tig, Clay and Jax returned to the lot. Before they noticed that I was still there, they walked into the clubhouse, no doubt going to church. I rolled my eyes and decided to drop by work. I needed to show my face there sometime, and then I would take Chance to the hospital. They have their own animal day for the children to interact with animals at the hospital.

* * *

I know that Chance is still too small, but he needs to learn some time, and I needed someone to look after him while I went to see Abel. I couldn't bring a dog into the NICU.

I walked into the hospital, carrying Chance on my arm, and it wasn't an easy task. He squirmed, trying to get down. The nurses smiled as they saw me walking towards them. This was the second time I brought Chance with me, and they all fell in love immediately.

"Oh, how precious he is." One of the nurses told me, petting my dog's head.

"Yeah, I know. He's the best dog ever." I agreed with a smile. Chance let out a little bark, and it made us laugh. We were going to visit the children in the surgical wing today. Those are the children that are just there for a few days. I wanted to go to the ones with cancer, but most of them was up for a round of chemo today, and a dog would not do them any good, with the germs and all. The kids in that unit, looked so sad and down today, and it made me feel bad for them.

"Hey, you guys." I said, offering them a smile.

"Hey, Sophie." They all replied at the same time.

"I know that you're not feeling too hot today, so I brought you someone, that I hope will cheer you up a little." I told them, and let them see Chance, and they loved him. To see the bright smile on their faces, the light in the eyes coming back, it was all worth it, and chance loved every second of it.

"What's his name?" One girl asked me.

"His name is Chance, and I call him that, because I gave him a chance, and he gave me a chance to love him." I answer, as I watched how careful those kids treated Chance. He just made their day, and that's all that matters.

"He's so cute! Can we keep him here all the time?"

"No, I'm sorry, but I'll make sure that he comes to visit every day he's allowed to, okay?" I asked them, trying to compromise. But secretly, I wished the same as them, I wish he could stay at the hospital every day. It meant so much for the patients.

Chance jumped around on the floor, finding some shoelaces to chew on, and played with the kids. I knew for sure, that he would be completely dead by the time I took him home. Something caught my attention on the other side of the windows, and I saw Tara walking around. I didn't like her at all. What was she doing back here now? I saw Jax drive her home just this morning. Maybe that's the beauty of working as a doctor. You don't have too much free time. Too much free time to steal my man. I narrowed my eyes, trying to think of what to do about Tara trying to worm her way into Jax's heart again. I was prepared to kick her bony ass, reminding her on who Jax belongs to.

I decided to wait a little while, and let the kids enjoy Chance, but it didn't take long, before Chance got tired. I hated to do so, but I needed to give him some rest.

I said goodbye to the kids, and put Chance in his cage. What do you know, he fell asleep in an instant? He is the cutest dog ever.

I walked up to the nurse's station, seeing Rosie filling out some papers.

"Hey, Rosie." I greeted, gaining a smile from the kind woman.

"Hey, Sophie." She replied, and smiled even wider, when she saw the dog. "Oh, my god! He's precious."

"Thank you. Hey, I know it's a lot to ask, but I need to talk to someone. Is there any way you could just watch him for a couple of minutes, so I can do the thing I need to get done?" I asked her.

"Of course, I would love to take care of this little guy. Oh, and when you try to beat the living shit out Dr. Knowles, try not to mess up her face too much." Rosie said with a snicker. Is there not one thing that woman miss?

"I can't promise anything." I said, walking towards the room I saw Tara walked into earlier. I was ready to confront Tara, and I wasn't going to back down from this. I think Gemma would be proud of me.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

As Clay, Tig and Jax returned, they summoned for Church and headed to the clubhouse. They needed to know more about what happened all those years ago.

"And all three of them were Mayans?" Jax asked Tig and Clay.

"Yep. Back in '92 Mexicans tried to expand their Oakland dope base, set up a charter in Lodi. We couldn't let that happen. It was a bloody two years. Bodies dropped." Clay answered.

"Yeah, I remember. That was right around the time my old man died." Jax said.

"That's right. We got to stop the P.D. from getting I.D's on those bodies. If they flag the Mayans, we're their next stop." Tig shot in, clearly a little worried about all of this.

"Well, we can pull teeth to stop the I.D. But they can still D.N.A. Test." Jax suggested.

"Forensic tests on three bodies? That would blow half of Unser's yearly budget." Bobby told him.

"But if Hale thought it would hurt us he'd get his new fed buddies to float the costs." Clay shot in.

Shit, man, that was pre-O.J., right? We weren't thinking about D.N.A. back in '93." Tig said with a laugh. "What kind of clues we got buried with those Mexicans?"

"If they don't know they're Mayans, they won't take it any farther." Chibs told him.

"We stop the identification, we stop the investigation." Clay said, and it was the final word, before they broke the meeting up, they all knew what was at stake here, some more than others.

Clay walked over to Half-Sack, that was still training hard for the upcoming fight.

"So, uh, there's a 15K purse on the line and a lot of ringside action." Clay told him.

"Yeah. I'm ready." Half-Sack told them.

"This ain't no army boxing, kid. This is street brawling." Chibs shot in.

"No. It's cool." Half-Sack said as Cherry hands him a beer. Clay sees this, and silently tells Bobby to make his move.

"Cherry pie. It's time to go." Bobby told her.

"What are you talking about? Go where?" Cherry asked.

"What are you doing, Bobby?" Half-Sack didn't like this.

"Relax, prospect. She's gonna stay with him till the fight." Clay explained to him.

"No, I'm not." Cherry argued.

"Oh, yeah, you are." Clay said firmly.

"Why?"

"No booze. No dope." Tig said, taking his beer away from him.

"No pussy." Clay added at the end.

"You'll love my place. It's very cozy." Bobby told her to get on her nerves.

"Get your hands off me." Cherry hissed at him, as Bobby took her away. "Back off."

"Clay, no sex before a fight's like an old wives' thing." Half-Sack complained.

"Did- Did you just insult my old lady again?" Clay asked harshly.

"No." Half-Sack said in defeat.

"Jump." Chibs ordered, and they all couldn't help but laugh at the frustrated young man.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I walked determent towards the room I had seen Tara disappear into a little while ago, I was ready to give her a piece of my mind, but someone beat me to it. Hale walked into to the room before me, and I couldn't kick her ass without the risk of being arrested. I knew I should've walked away, but I needed to know what they were talking about. So, I eavesdropped.

"Why didn't you tell me it was Kohn?" Hale asked her. Wait, the creepy F.B.I agent?

"Jax told you?" Tara asked in defeat.

"I did not know that Kohn was the guy that was stalking you." Hale pressed on.

"You know, I tried getting help in Chicago. Complained to his superiors- Made things worse. I went through three precincts before someone would even give me that restraining order." Tara told him, and I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. But I hated her for bringing him here, so close to Abel, putting us all in danger.

"I doubted you could do anything."

"Tara. Kohn's boss doesn't even know that he is here. This guy is in deep shit. He is done." Hale told her.

"Really?"

"He is leaving Charming. I promise. And I am sorry." Hale said, holding a comforting hand on her shoulder. Something told me, that was the reason Jax drove her home earlier this morning, but it didn't make me calm, because I knew deep down, Tara wanted Jax back, and she would do anything to get him. I was too lost in my thoughts, that I didn't see Hale exciting the room.

"Sophie!" He said harshly, dragging me along with him. "Were you eavesdropping in on our conversation?"

"Let go of my arm, David!" I hissed, and broke free. "I was actually going to talk to Tara myself, about something else entirely, but I guess I heard what you were talking about. Is it true? Is that fucker here, because of her?"

"Yes." Hale answered shortly, and it made me fume with anger.

"I knew it was a bad idea that she came back here. Did you know that he was in Abel's room yesterday?" I hissed.

"What?" Hale exclaimed.

"He told me all this kinds of weird shit, and then told me to really think about my choices regarding my own boyfriend." I said, feeling protective of Abel for the most part. "Is there any way, you could have some of your guys outside Abel's room for a while? I would feel a lot safer, knowing that someone was looking out for him when we're not there."

Hale looked at me for a moment, before letting out a breath.

"I promise you, I won't let anything happen to that little boy, regardless who his father is." Hale said, and in some other scenario, I would've kicked his ass for saying that, but this wasn't about Jax. This was about a little defenseless boy.

"Thank you, David. It really means a lot." I said, giving him a hug.

"No problem." Hale whispered in my ear, before kissing the side of my head. What I didn't see, was Tara standing there watching us, and that she had some evil plan on her mind.

* * *

After some time, I got my dad to come and pick Chance up, because I didn't want to leave to hospital after I found out more about this Kohn guy. I felt as if I couldn't leave Abel here, at least, not until that protective detail got here.

I was about to go and get myself some coffee, when I saw Jax and Tig walking through the doors. He noticed me, and I suddenly felt bad for blowing him off this morning.

"Hey. What are you doing here?" I asked, grabbing my coffee.

"Only some club business." Jax told me, keeping a little distance from me. "Are we good?"

"Yeah, it's just me. I feel insecure sometimes, I'm sorry." I said, not really looking at him. Jax sighed and wrapped his arm around me, bringing me along with them, and I was curious to what they were up to. What I didn't understand, was them stopping outside a break room.

"What are you doing?" I asked in a whisper.

"Just watch." Tig said as Jax looked around.

"Tara's not here."

"What do you wanna do?" Tig asked.

"Lab coat on the chair. Can you distract the doctors?" Jax asked him, and I looked like a question mark.

"Yeah. No problem." Tig said.

"Wait, what are you guys doing?" I hissed with a low voice. Jax only winked at me, and I watched as Tig walked into the room.

"Excuse me, ladies. How you doing? Uh, you're doctors, both of you?" Tig asked them.

"Yeah."

"Oh, thank God." Tig exclaimed, starting to undo his pants.

"Um, a Doberman pinscher took a chunk of my ass." Tig said, showing them his ass.

"You need to go to the E.R." One of the doctors said, and left the room in a hurry. I couldn't help but laugh out loud.

"You know, Tig. Jax said distract them, not scar 'em for life." I told him. Jax started to laugh as well, and that's when I saw the card he took. I knew better than to ask, so I decided to just let it go.

"I'm serious. I think it's infected." Tig said, as we walked out of the room. Jax and I walked together down the hall, and we didn't say anything to each other. Not at first anyway.

"Hey. I don't know what got into you earlier, but let me know if I've done something to upset you. Do you regret last night?" Jax told me, and I felt so bad.

"No… Not at all. It's just… I saw you giving Tara a ride early this morning, and the thought of her wrapped around you like that… it made me want to mess her up." I said, feeling an instant blush crawling up over my face. I thought Jax would start an argument about Tara again, but that's not what he did. He grabbed my face and kissed me senseless.

"I love it when you're being overprotective. And to think about you being all defensive, it's kind of a turn on." Jax said huskily, before kissing me again. I had to use all my strength, not to shove him into a closet, and go all caveman on him, but I knew we had something on our hands, that was more important at the moment. Jax kissed me again, before grabbing my hand and walking back to Abel's room. We found Clay standing there, watching Abel. We walked in together, and the sound of his machines was all we could hear in the room.

"Hey." Jax said with a low voice, not wanting to disturb Abel. "Managed to steal a key card from an intern. Hopefully it gets us below."

Jax handed Clay the card, and I wondered what they wanted with it.

"Yeah. Me and Tig'll take care of this. Why don't you stay here and run interference?" Clay said.

"Why?" Jax asked, as Tara walked into the room. Seeing her here, giving me the stink-eye, made me want to rip her head clean off.

"Hey, Doc." Clay said.

"Hey."

"Kid looks strong, huh?"

"Yeah."

The awkward silence was suffocating, and I wanted nothing more than to leave.

"Well, you have a good night, all right?" Clay said and left the room.

"You too." Tara called after him, I did not want to stay here, in this room with Tara and Jax together, so I decided that it was best for me to leave as well.

"Hey, babe? I think I'll head out too. It's been a long day, and I could really use a shower, or a bath right about now. And if you're not too late, maybe you'll even get to join me." I said seductively. Jax eyes sparked with lust, and I could tell he wanted to leave with me. I looked over at Tara briefly, before turning back to Jax, kissing him passionately, showing Tara that she could never have him. It made me feel like a queen.

"Don't leave me hanging. I said, before leaving the room. Maybe not the smartest idea to turn your boyfriend on like that, and leave him in a room with an ex… But I felt confident, that he wouldn't do anything like that. Or at least, I hope he wouldn't.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Clay and Tig got through all the way to the morgue on that card, which was a good thing for them.

"I'll find us some gloves." Clay said, looking around the room.

"Okay." Tig said, starting to look through the dead bodies. He found a gorgeous, young woman, and he wanted to touch her.

"Hey, freako. We ain't here to find you a date." Clay said, snapping him out of it.

"I know. I know. It's just-You know. You ever?" Tig asked.

"What? Cold pack?"

"Yeah."

"Nah. Not my thing." Clay told him, putting on some gloves.

"I know it's a little bit creepy at first but then something happens, man, I'm telling you. This soothing coldness. This stillness. It's really a beautiful thing." Tig said, getting lost again.

"Please. Please, stop." Clay begged as they heard a knock on the door.

"Goddamn it." Clay exclaimed, but calmed down, when he saw that it was Jax. "It's all right. Keep looking. I thought I told you to wait upstairs."

"Well, there's no interference to run and I figured you could use the extra pair of hands. Is that all right?" Jax argued back.

"I got 'em. All three." Tig announced, and they got ready to destroy evidence. "Hold the head.

Tight."

"Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. It's already been I.D.'d." Jax said, reading the note stuck to one of the dead bodies. "Lowell Harlan Sr. This is Lowell's old man."

Clay and Tig looked at each other, and they both knew that they've screwed up.

They walked upstairs and Clay stayed behind, talking to Jax.

"Why was Lowell's dad buried with the enemy?" Jax asked him.

"Casualty of war. Mayans took him out." Clay answered.

"He worked at T.M. He wasn't patched." Jax said.

"Mayans went after everybody. Family, friends. Didn't matter."

"Lowell thinks his dad just split. Poor bastard's convinced he's still out there." Jax argued.

"I know."

"So why the same grave?" Jax asked.

"Disrespect. I know. It was a crazy two years. I didn't have time to think a lot of shit through." Clay argued.

"Is that why you didn't want me in the morgue? Protect that secret?" Jax asked him.

"I got no secrets from you." Clay said, starting to walk away.

"You know, with the Mayans I.D.'d too I can only imagine the poison Hale's gonna pour in Lowell's ear." Jax called after him.

"I'll handle Lowell." Clay told him. "You, go home to Sophie."

Jax knew that this reveal, meant big troubles, but right now, nothing more seemed fitting than to go home to his Old Lady.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I parked my car in the driveway, and I realized, that I hadn't been home since Jax and I left this morning, and so much happened today, I didn't even know where to start. My muscles ached both from moving around all day, and the fact that Jax and I fucked each other's brains out yesterday. It was such a beautiful moment. Chance was still with my dad, and that made me feel alone. I hoped that Jax would come home to me tonight, and that I wouldn't be alone.

I jumped out of the car, and walked to my door to unlock it, when my phone buzzed. It was a text from Hale. He told me he would have an undercover cop on duty at all times, making sure that Agent Kohn would leave Abel alone, and if there wasn't anyone to use, he would do it himself. Hale could be a pain in the ass, but right now, he was a perfect gentleman.

I sighed in relief, and locked myself into my house. I threw the keys on the dresser, and turned on the lights, as I walked through the house. For some reason, it felt emptier, now that Jax wasn't here. I walked by the two guestrooms, and I couldn't help but thinking about turning them into nurseries. We could easily have two or three babies in this house. Look at me, already thinking about babies.

I sighed, shaking the thought from my head, and walked towards the bathroom, knowing that I had a shitload of laundry to do, before I could even think about taking a bath. Jax's clothes from yesterday was still scattered all over my floors, and I thought I could just wash them in the process.

It was nice, doing these normal chores, instead of thinking about why Clay needed the key-card back at the hospital. When the laundry was in the washer, I closed the door, and decided to finally take my bath, and I wanted to be as relaxed as possible. Used my best bubbles, lighted some candles, and turned off the lights. I put on some soft, relaxing music, as in 80's love songs, and I couldn't wait to soak in the warm bathwater. For once, I would just let my trouble go. I eased myself into the warm water, and laid my head back, and closed my eyes, listening to the songs of Roxette and Journey.

* * *

It didn't take long, before I heard my front door open. At first, my instinct was to jump out of the water, to see who it was, but I decided against it. It could only be Jax. The door to my bathroom opened, and Jax stood there, looking dead beat, and it made me feel bad.

"Wow… you weren't kidding." He said, scratching the back of his head with a strained laugh.

"No, I wasn't. Is everything all right?" I asked him.

"No, everything is going to shit." Jax answered with a sigh, and it made my heart ache for him.

"Come on, sweetheart, get in. I'll take care of you." I said softly, and I didn't need to tell him twice. He stripped out of his clothes, and I had to bite my lip from not moaning at the sight. His ripped muscles, his broad chest, everything about him, made him irresistible. I half-expected him to get in behind me, but he jumped into the tub in front of me, and faceplanted into my chest, wrapping his arms around my waist. Thank God, that I have a huge tub. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed his forehead. The song of U2's "With or Without You" softly played in the background, as we laid there in silence. It felt so nice, laying here like this. That was until I could feel the frown on Jax's face.

"Are you seriously listening to 80's music?" Jax asked me, and that made me pull his hair a little.

"Don't dis my taste in music, it may make me change my taste in men." I warned him. Jax only chuckled, and looked up at me.

"Now, we wouldn't want that, now do we?" Jax asked me, sitting up, dragging me with him, placing me on his lap. I immediately wrap my arms around his neck, laughing at him, before sealing my mouth with his. I ran my fingers down his back, and that made him groan and I could tell he was growing hard, fast. This man was like a beast, and he was all mine. Jax kissed down my neck, all the way down to my breast, making me moan in pleasure, trying to get even closer to him.

"Jax." I said with a gasp, and that made him smirk against my breasts.

"Yes, darling?" He said, looking straight into my eyes. Those blue eyes I would forever get lost in.

"No foreplay." I begged, and he actually looked surprised. Without warning, I grabbed onto him, squeezing him gently, earning a moan from him. He brought my lips down to his and I kissed him fiercely. Jax lifted me up a little, and impaling me on his shaft, making me cry out in pleasure. The intense feeling of him, was overwhelming. For a moment, we just stopped, looking at each other. I smiled with a devilish grin, and rocked hard against him, making his eyes cross with pleasure. I drove him mad, and that's the only thing I wanted. Jax sat there, letting me decide the pace, and I gladly did so. With every roll of my hips, Jax's grip on me got tighter, and water went over the edge of the tub, all over the floor, but I didn't care.

"Sophie." Jax moaned, but I didn't have it in me to answer. He started to suck on one of my nipples, biting it, at that made my movement more erratic. One of his hands disappeared into the water, finding my bundle of nerves, and that just sent me right over the edge. I was so sensitive around him, it was crazy. Jax shifted me a little, getting the chance to pound into me, getting his own release. That only, made my stomach coil, and I felt another orgasm coming our way. I bit down on Jax's neck, at the same time as I clenched around him, making him explode his load inside me, and I came all over again, falling towards Jax, trying to catch my breath. Jax was panting for breath himself, holding onto me for dear life. I tiredly lifted my head from his chest, and looked into his beautiful eyes. He removed the wet hair away from my face, and he couldn't help but smile at my dazed look. I kissed him slowly, savoring this moment we had together.

"I love you." He whispered against my lips.

"I love you too." I whispered back. We sat like this for a long time, having a difficult time, trying to get our legs to work.

Jax helped me dry off, and carried me back to bed, tucking the both of us in, and I fell asleep content in the arms of the man I love.

* * *

The next morning, I woke up to an empty bed. I looked around me, and panicked a little, when I couldn't find Jax. I looked at the clock, and it was only about 8 in the morning. Way too early for me to be up. But I couldn't sleep without Jax next to me. I grab my robe from the chair next to my bed, and walk through the house, trying to see if Jax had left yet. I look out the window, only to find his bike still standing there in my driveway. I walk out to the kitchen, where the coffee was still in the machine, freshly made. I pour myself one, and from the window in my kitchen, I can see Jax sitting out in the backyard of the house, drinking coffee, and have a smoke in the morning sun. I smile huge, and practically run to the back door, opening it up, letting Jax know that I'm awake.

"Hey." I said, stepping outside.

"Good morning, Darlin'" Jax said, smiling widely when he laid his eyes on me. I walked over to him, sitting on his lap. I leaned in, kissing him lovingly. He tasted like caffeine and tobacco.

"Good morning." I murmured against his lips. "What are you doing up so early?"

"I couldn't sleep, Darlin'. But I need to go back to TM soon for my shift, anyway." Jax said, as I grabbed his cigarette, taking a drag.

"Yeah, I should probably come too. I need to talk to Gem, anyway. See how she's doing after being in the slammer." I said, kissing Jax again.

"Yeah? Well, let's wait for a few minutes. It's nice to just sit here like this without having to deal with all the shit that we do." Jax said, wrapping his arms around my waits, kissing my neck softly. I wanted to ask Jax to just move in here with me before Abel comes home. I want this to be our home together. But how do I tell him that? Maybe Mama Gem would know what to do. As on cue, my backdoor opened, and Mama Gem stood there, removing her sunglasses.

"Well, isn't this cozy." Gemma said with a smirk.

"Yes, it is. It's very cozy." Jax said, winking at his mother.

"If you two are done dry-humping each other, I could use some help from Sophie getting some stuff for the nursery before Abel comes home." Gemma said, and she didn't have to tell me twice.

"I would love to come with you." I said, trying to get off Jax's lap, but he held me back.

"Jax… let me go." I said politely.

"I don't think that's such a good idea right now." Jax argued back, and I finally understood why.

"Jax… your mother doesn't care that you have a boner." I said, kissing him lightly before jumping off his lap, leaving the two, so I could get dressed. I could hear Jax swearing, and Gemma laughing. God, I love this family.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

A few hours later, Clay finally found the courage to go talk to Lowell about his dad. It was a hard conversation to have, but necessary. For Lowell, and for the club. Clay walked into the garage, as Lowell worked on his bike.

"Sounds good." Clay told him, making the young man smile.

"Is it cool if I work on it before my shift?" Lowell asked him.

"Yeah."

Is everything okay, man?" Lowell asked nervously.

"I want you to hear this from me." Clay said all serious.

"What? Something happen to Moby? I left him with Anita." Lowell said, thinking that something was wrong with his son.

"No, no, no. Your kid's fine." Clay said quickly. "Those bodies they, uh, pulled out of the hole on 44- one of'em's your old man."

"My dad? Oh, that- that don't make sense." Lowell said, not believing it.

"I'm sorry, son." Clay said, and he meant it.

"No. He ran off when I was, like, 15. He just split. Everyone told me that. You told me that." Lowell argued.

"I know."

"Well, the son of a bitch was already dead to me, right? What, uh- What happened to him?" Lowell asked.

"Mayan war. Wrong place, wrong time. The, uh, other bodies they found in the hole- those are the two Mexicans that killed your dad. Vengeance was meted out." Clay told him. "The cops- they're gonna try to lay all those bodies at Sam Crow's feet."

"That's bullshit." Lowell exclaimed.

* * *

"I know. It ain't a matter of true or false. Hale is gonna try to screw with your compass. I don't want you losing true north." Clay told him, before giving the broken man a hug. He may not have had a good relationship with his old man, but knowing he was dead, was heartbreaking.

Jax was up on the roof, looking down at them, and he felt disgusted about it all. He hadn't even managed to tell Sophie about Lowell's old man, and he figured when she found out, she would do everything in her power to keep him up. And she would be pissed as fuck. Jax shook his head, and sat down. He figured it was time to read a bit more in his father's journal.

 _Inside the club there had to be truth._

 _Our word was our honor._

 _But outside, it was all about deception._

 _Lies were our defense, our default._

 _To survive, you had to master the art of perjury._

 _The lie and the truth had to feel the same._

 _But once you learned that skill, nobody knows the truth in or outside the club._

 _Especially you._

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

Gemma and I walked through the store on Main Street, going through Gemma's list. I walked around a little absentminded, thinking of a way to open up to Mama Gem about the whole moving thing. Would Jax like it to move into his girlfriend's house, and not the other way around?

"What's on your mind, Princess?" Gemma asked suddenly, and I jumped out of my thoughts.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I said, trying to play it cool.

"Sweetheart… I know you better than anyone." Gemma said, but suddenly, her eyes almost popped out of her head. Oh, dear God. Don't tell me that you're pregnant!"

"God, Gemma. We had sex for the first time, two days ago! Give it a rest!" I exclaimed. "What do you think Jax would say to maybe moving into my house, so Abel's home would be my home, I mean, our home."

Gemma placed her hands on my shoulders to try to get me to stop rambling.

"Hey. Why are you freaking out? You know that Jax would love to live with you." Gemma said, trying to reassure me.

"Yeah, but what if he doesn't? What if he would want me to move into his place. The one he shared with Wendy?" I asked, and Gemma could understand why I didn't want to live there. Gemma looked at me with kind eyes.

"Why don't you talk to him about it? I am sure that he will see your side in this." Gemma told me, before giving me a hug.

"Yeah, I will, thank you, Gemma. I love you." I told her.

"Love you too, Princess." Gemma said, as we continued through the store to buy all the things Abel needed, and all the crap he didn't need, but what we wanted him to need. Gemma and I took our sweet time, getting ourselves a coffee, and some lunch, before heading back to Jax's house. The nursery was all done, thanks to Jax and Gemma. I hadn't done that much, only helped out with painting the walls blue. But all in all, I could see Abel living in here, I just wanted it to be in my house.

Gemma unlocked the door, and let me in first.

"This is going to be so good on him." I said, gesturing to the onesies I bought for him. I was a sucker for this kid, and I was going to spoil him rotten.

"I bet it will." Gemma said with a smile. "You're unbelievable, you know that?"

"Yeah, yeah. Sue me." I laughed as I walked into his room. What we found in there, was not how we left things. I was in complete shock. The room was trashed, the rocking chair and the crib was knocked over, and destroyed. The mobile over his crib was smashed, and there was pictures on the wall. Pictures of Jax and Thomas, with their faces cut out, pictures of me, and of Jax, screwing that bitch in Iron Hills, and the smell was horrible. I felt the tears threatening to fall, and I felt violated somehow.

"Oh, my God." I exclaimed, knowing who may be behind this. Gemma looked around in shock, stepping further into the room. She looked around, horrified at what she saw. She turned around, stepping in something wet, and it smelled like piss.

"Holy shit." Gemma said, before walking towards me, grabbing my arm.

"Where are we going?" I asked, trying to swallow my tears.

"We're calling Jax. He needs to see this." Gemma said. "And I'm taking you out of that room, because you don't need to see it like that."

Gemma was completely right, I hated seeing it like that. Why the hell would someone do that? And why in the baby's room? Gemma took me outside on the front porch, demanding that I would sit down, and gave me a cigarette. It helped me calming my nerves down, but it wasn't easy. How in the hell, could they bring Abel home, when someone easily broke into it? What if they tried to do it again?

I heard Gemma talking on the phone, before joining me. She grabbed her own cigarette, and we sat there in silence together. After about twenty minutes, the familiar sound of Jax's bike was heard from down the street. Both Gemma and I, jumped up when we saw him, and I immediately felt calmer, knowing that he was here.

"Hey." Jax said, getting off his bike. He could tell that I was shaken up about this, and wrapped his arms around me.

"Someone trashed his room." I mumbled into his chest. Jax held onto me, and looked over at his mother.

"Show me." Jax demanded and Gemma walked back into the house before us. Jax never let go of my hand as we walked through the house. He was so angry, especially when he saw his son's room.

"Who did this?" Gemma asked him.

"A.T.F." Jax told us.

"Why?" I asked.

"Tara."

"That stupid bitch." Gemma hissed.

"How is this her fault?" Jax argued. Why was he defending her? If she hadn't come back here, Kohn would never come here.

"He came by the hospital." I said suddenly, making both Gemma and Jax to look at me.

"When?" Jax pressed on.

"The same day Gemma got arrested." I answered. "I found him in Abel's room, and I kicked him out"

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jax was angry now.

"Because I was taking care of your mother, and when you came to my place, you jumped me so fast, I never got the chance to say anything!" I argued back. "I talked to Hale at the hospital. He promised he would have someone at the hospital at all times, making sure Kohn doesn't come near Abel again."

Jax started to calm down a little, but I knew this wouldn't last long.

"This guy's dead." Jax hissed at us.

"At least." Gemma agreed.

"Yeah." Jax replied, before starting to walk out.

"Jax." I tried to say, but he cut me off.

"You still should've told me." He shot back at me, and walked away before I could say anything else. I knew that he was telling the truth. I should've told him, and now I felt stupid for not saying anything. Would Jax forgive me for not telling him about this? Gemma felt bad for me, and wrapped her arms around me, to let me know that she was here for me.

"It's easier for him to get angry at you, because he knows that you're always going to be there. I know that it isn't fair, because you would never do anything to hurt that boy." Gemma said.

"Come on, let's get you home. You don't need to see this." Gemma added and ushered me out of the house, and drove us back to my house.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

When Jax left his house and Sophie behind, he was angry as hell. He knew that he was taking it out on Sophie, but right now, he didn't care. He called Hale, to tell him the news.

 _"Kohn's still in town."_

 ** _"I know. He's at Floyd's. I'm taking care of it."_**

Jax hung up the phone, and riding his bike towards town, he was going to pay Floyd's a visit.

In town, Kohn was still at Floyd's, getting his beard shaved.

"I'm really gonna miss this, Floyd." Kohn told him, and he couldn't see Floyd rolling his eyes at him.

"Yep." Floyd said, before stepping away when he saw Jax outside the shop. He knew better than to interfere. Jax grabbed a hold of Kohn, and slammed him into the wall.

"You wanna go to war with me, you sick piece of shit?" Jax said angrily, and threw Kohn through a window. He was mostly angry about him trashing up the nursery, and that he was stalking Tara. But he had approached his kid and his girl, that's not something he wanted to take lightly. No one did that. Jax jumped after him, really doing a number on him, beating the crap out of him. Kohn grabbed a pair of scissors, and stabbed Jax in the thigh, making Jax yell out in pain. Jax kept on beating the shit out of him, until Hale came along and managed to get him away.

It didn't surprise him that Hale had to bring him into the station with him.

* * *

Jax sat there in one of the interrogation rooms, waiting for the charges to come. He definitely thought that Kohn would press charges, and that A.T.F would support him.

Unser sat with Jax, as he got his leg stitched back together, and they just sat there in silence until Agent Stahl came into the room. She didn't really look at Jax at all, only looking through the statement from Floyd.

"Barber says you came in for a haircut. Agent Kohn attacked you with a pair of scissors.

So you pushed him through a plate glass window. Self-defense." Stahl said. Jax had to play it cool, and not mess this up.

"That's what Floyd saw, I guess that's what happened." Jax told her.

"That's fantastic. Tell me. Are they all just afraid of you or convinced that you are a necessary evil?" Stahl asked.

"You charging me?" Jax asked.

"No charges." Unser answered.

"Why does Kohn have a hard-on for you?" Stahl asked.

"You know why." Jax answered.

"You're right. I do. Tara Knowles. The charming ingenue. High school sweethearts, right?" Stahl asked.

"Yeah."

"She fears for her life so she comes back home to the only man she knows loves her enough to protect her a guy who would have no problem putting a fed through a plate glass window. That's beautiful. Really, it is. I wish I had that kind of pull over someone. You're a lucky man. Having a woman that comes running, because she needs you, and another woman you supposedly love to warm your bed at night." Stahl said, dragging Sophie Winston into this. Sophie didn't need to know about this at all.

"You done?" Jax asked, not wanting to hear her talking more about Sophie.

"Yeah. She's done." Unser answered, and Jax got up from his chair.

"If Sophie asks about this, you don't tell her anything, okay?" Jax told Unser, as they walked out of the room.

"Well, I wish you would've told me that sooner." Unser said, and that's when Jax saw Sophie standing there, waiting for him.

"Shit." Jax mumbled under his breath.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I still felt so stupid, when I finally arrived back at my house, I just really wanted to be alone for a while, and told Gemma to go home. This day had just been utter crap, and I just didn't know what to do. I was completely drained, and wanted nothing more than this stupid day to end. I did the only thing I could do, and that was to clean my house. If I would ever make this house into a family home, then I needed to make it look like one. I tried to call Jax a couple of times, but he didn't pick up. He was probably still angry with me for not telling him about Kohn. I know I should've told him about it, but it slipped my mind, when he tried to fuck me into oblivion the other day, and I would never do anything to harm that boy. I loved him as if he was my own, and for all I'm concerned, Abel is my son.

I was just about to finish the largest guest room, when my phone buzzed. I looked at the caller I.D, and saw Unser's name.

 _"Unser? What's going on?"_

 ** _"Hey, Sophie. I'm sorry to bother you, but I need you to come down to the station again."_**

 _"Why, what's wrong? Did Gemma do something again?"_

 ** _"No, it's you man this time. He attacked Kohn, and threw him through a window."_**

 _"Ugh… I'll be there in about 15 minutes."_

I hung up the phone, and swore loudly. I should've known that Jax would go after Kohn, but the question was… did he go after Kohn because of me and Abel, or because of Tara and Abel? That was two different things completely. I got my purse and my keys, and walked out to my car. I let out a sigh, and started to drive towards the sheriff's office. I wasn't sure if Jax wanted me to come and pick him up, but I since Unser called me, I figured I could at least go there, if he didn't want me to be there, he would tell me to leave.

I walked into the station, feeling everyone's eyes on me. It wasn't that long ago, I came in here with Gemma, and she started to shout at Clay. I tried not to be too worked up about it and found my way over to Hale's office. He sat there, doing some kind of report, and looked up when he saw me.

"Hey. What are you doing here?" Hale asked me.

"Unser called. He told me that Jax was here." I said, letting out a sigh.

"Yeah. He and Stahl have him in the interrogation room right now. I don't think he'll get arrested, though." Hale tried to reassure me. "He'll probably go home with you tonight."

"That's good to know." I muttered under my breath.

"Do you want something to drink while you wait?" Hale asked me.

"No, thank you, David. I just want to get Jax, and go home." I answered, before going back outside to wait for him. I don't know how long I had to wait, and took my phone out, to check for messages. I got one from Gemma, wondering if I wanted to come to that fight thing tonight, but I told her no, but not the reason why. Luckily, it didn't seem as if I had to wait too long for Jax. The door opened rather quickly, and I stood up. When Jax saw me, he looked a little guilty, and he was limping a little, do doubt, he was in a slight pain.

"Hey…" He said, as he reached me.

"Are you okay?" I asked, looking at him, but not touching him.

"Yeah, I'm all right." He said, placing his hands in his pockets.

"Good, let's get you home." I said, and started to walk out of the station. Jax caught up with me, and placed his arm around my shoulder. I wanted to shrug it off, but I didn't want to cause a scene right now. I opened the car door for him, so he could get in without hurting his leg even more.

"I need to get you to TM." I said, without looking at him.

"Why?" Jax asked.

"Because that's where my supplies are, and I need to get your leg cleaned up again, you've already bled through it." I said, and that's when Jax noticed it.

"Oh…" Was all he said. I fought the urge to roll my eyes, and just paid attention to the road.

* * *

When we reached TM, it was deadly quiet. Everyone was at the boxing match or someplace else, and that's where Jax should be as well.

"Let's go into your room." I said, as I got out of the car. I let him lean on me a little, as we crossed the lot. Not that he needed it, but something told me that he needed me close to him.

"Take off your pants." I ordered before he sat down on the bed.

"Aren't you gonna buy me a beer, darlin?" Jax tried to joke, but I wasn't in the mood for his jokes right now, and gave him a stern look.

"Right." He said, and undid his pants. Luckily, the wound wasn't too deep, and it didn't take long before I could clean it properly.

"He deserved it, you know." Jax said suddenly, and I looked up at him.

"Is that so?" I asked, not entirely convinced.

"After what he did, he should be glad that everything I did, was throwing him out of the window." Jax said, winching a little, as I put a little too much pressure on his wound.

"Is it so bad that I did this for you?" Jax asked me, as I finished putting the band-aid on.

"But you didn't do it for me, did you though?" I asked, looking at him.

"What is that supposed to mean?" He asked.

"You think that I'm that stupid? Do you really think that you didn't do this for Tara?" I asked back with a calm voice, because if I talked any louder, I would explode.

"Why would I care about Tara?" Jax asked me, and I started to count to ten.

"Yeah, why would you? That's a question I've always asked myself. Why would you? You know, when I drove home, after picking your mother's car up at the station, and I saw you two together, my first thought was: Why would you give her a ride, and then it hit me… You were just being nice, but when I saw the way you reacted to the nursery, and how you defended her, it got me thinking. Maybe you do still have feelings for her, and I'm afraid, that if she chooses to hook her claws into you again, that's the last I'll ever see of you, that you would just turn around and not look back. I won't go through that again with you, Jackson." I said, trying not to let my tears get the best of me.

"Sophie. I promise you… you have nothing to worry about when it comes to Tara. You're the one I love." Jax told me, cupping my face in his hands.

"Then tell me right now, look me in the eye, and tell me that you don't have feelings for Tara, that what you felt for her, all those years ago, are gone." I argued softly, and I wanted more than anything, for him to give me what I wanted, but it didn't surprise me that he didn't say anything. That was confirmation enough for me.

"I guess that's my answer." I mumbled.

My phone buzzed, and I saw a cryptic text from Anita. Lowell had gone on a bender, fallen off the wagon, and the only one that could reach out to him, was me. I packed my things together, trying not to look at Jax.

"Hey, Sophie. Don't leave. Not now." Jax pleaded.

"No, Jax. I can't stay here, listening to what you have to say, when you're this conflicted about how you feel. If it's really me you want, then show me, but I know that I can't compete with Tara, I never could. I think I need to be alone tonight, and maybe we could talk tomorrow. Right now, I need to find Lowell, before he kills himself." I said, leaving his room, before he had the chance to argue.

As I reached my car, my phone buzzed again, and this time, it was Clay.

 _"Clay, I really don't have time for this right now."_

 ** _"Come meet me at the Vista Hotel. I found Lowell, and he really needs our help, preferably yours."_**

 _"I'm on my way."_

At least, now I knew where to find him, and I would go and talk to him, hoping that he would consider going to rehab again. One can only hope.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Gemma was cleaning up the nursery back at Jax's house. She could tell how angry and hurt Sophie was, and how all of this was Tara's fault. Gemma had seen the way Jax acted around Tara, and that was troubling her. Clay was there with her, and he just sat there as Gemma ranted on to him.

"She's getting under his skin. I can feel it. It's bad for us. It's bad for Sophie." Gemma said, ripping down the offensive pictures from the wall.

"I'm keeping an eye on it. I'm not gonna let anything turn Jax away from Sam Crow, or Sophie, especially pussy." Clay said, trying to calm his wife down.

"Tara's not pussy. He loved her. Probably still does." Gemma shot back. That was her biggest fear. Even though Jax loved Sophie, she knew that Tara was messing with his head, that she was messing up his feelings.

"Whoa." Tig said as he walked in, seeing what kind of shit went down in that nursery. "Hey. Anita just called. Lowell? M.I.A. She just found Moby in the apartment, crying and locked in the bathroom."

"Shit." Clay exclaimed.

"Yeah. He probably went to Lodi looking to score." Tig said.

"It's not your fault, baby." Gemma told him. "You've been taking care of Lowell since he was 16. You done everything you could. Just some shit you can't escape."

"It's like father, like son." Tig added.

"Yeah. Looks like it's going that way." Clay said, and he did not look forward to this.

"Got to remember what's important. Big picture." Gemma said, and she didn't like this either.

"I'll call the Vista, see if he checked in." Tig said before leaving.

"No one blames you if Lowell don't come home." Gemma told her husband.

"You're forgetting about one…" Clay said. "And that's Sophie."

Gemma didn't like to admit that he was right, but Sophie would care if Lowell disappeared.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I drove towards the Vista Hotel as fast as I could. I knew that time was of the essence, and that I needed to get to him quickly. I needed to make sure that he would not harm himself or others.

Luckily, the drive wasn't that long, and I made it to the Vista Hotel within 20 minutes, and I saw Clay's bike on the outside. I'm glad he called me, and not did something drastic, like killing him or something. I'm sure Clay is more than capable to do so.

I jumped out of the car, and on my way here, I had already called the rehab center, telling them that it was a huge possibility that I would arrive with a new patient some time tonight.

I picked up my phone again, to let Clay know that I was here. He told me to go to room 5, so that's what I did. When I got to the door, I could hear Lowell's plead to Clay, telling him to kill him. It broke my heart, knowing that Lowell was hurting like this. I knocked twice, before opening the door. Lowell sat in a corner, crying his eyes out, and Clay stood in the bathroom, flushing his stash down the toilet.

"Hey." I said quietly, and that made Lowell finally looking at me.

"Sophie." He whispered. "Sophie, I messed up." Lowell said, still crying hysterically.

"Sssh… I know, I know, Lowell. But everything is going to be okay." I tried to reassure him.

"How?"

"Well, for starters, I'm gonna take you back to the rehab center, and you're going to do the program again, because I believe in you, and so does Moby." I told him, and by mentioning his son, Lowell started to cry even harder.

"I hurt Moby." He cried, and I turned to Clay for answers.

"Anita found Moby locking in the bathroom, he was crying and hysterical, but he's okay now." Clay told me, and I tried my best, not to cry.

"Oh, Lowell. I'm sure Moby will forgive you." I said, patting his shoulder. "But before he can, let's get you to the rehab center, okay?"

I never thought that Lowell would agree to this, but he nodded his head, and I brought him in for a hug. Lowell was a good man, he had just lost his way for a bit, and I hadn't lost my faith in him, not yet.

"Can you help me, getting him in the car?" I asked Clay, and he nodded. He placed Lowell in the back seat of my car, and I wanted to get Lowell to rehab as soon as possible.

"Are you sure you want to take him all by yourself? I could call someone to come and help you, Juice isn't doing anything today. I could always get Happy to meet you half way there." Clay said.

"I'm sure I'll be fine, it's just half an hour drive from Lodi, but I'm sure I can tell that to Happy myself, when I find him following me out of Lodi." I answered, knowing that Clay would send Happy after me no matter what I said. Clay gave me a kiss on the cheek, before I drove off. Lowell laid there in the back seat, shivering for the withdrawal I knew he was experiencing. He wrapped the blanket tighter around him, and passed out by the time I entered the outline of the city. This was for the best. Lowell needed to get well, so he could be there for his son. He needed this. A few miles down the road, I saw a bike following me, and as I suspected, Happy was following me, making sure that I made it to the rehab center without any problems on the way.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Gemma was still at Jax's house, and she was not sure why, maybe a part of her wanted to see if Jax would stop by. She wanted to talk to him about all of this. About Tara, and how she would eventually mess every form of progress her son had with Sophie. Her prayers were answered, as Jax walked into the nursery.

"Why aren't you at the fight?" Gemma asked, not that surprised with seeing him alone without Sophie.

"I've had my share for the day. I even got told off by Sophie." Jax said, kissing his mother's cheek.

"Yeah. Your leg okay?"

"Yeah. Sophie made sure of that before she bailed." Jax said, leaning against the crib.

"Where's the doctor?" Gemma asked him.

"I don't know."

"Where you going with that, Jax?" Gemma asked worried.

"Nowhere. Why does everyone keep asking me that?" Jax said irritated.

"I don't believe that. I've seen the two of you together. See how you act around her. She's still got ties in you." Gemma said softly. She never expected her son to respond with anger.

"You know what? I don't give a shit what you think. What I do, what Tara does- it's not your business. Or Sophie's." Jax practically hissed at his mother.

"Cleaning up piss and broken cribs, that's my business? Sophie taking care of your son, no questions asked." Gemma argued.

"No one asked you to take this on. This house, this kid. It's not your burden. It's mine." Jax said, ready to leave.

"Jackson Nathaniel Teller! If you do anything to hurt Sophie, the one you always loved, the one you always compared Tara to, if you mess this up by pursuing said woman, and it all comes back to bite you in the ass, if we lose Sophie again, I will never forgive you. Sophie is your world, Tara is just a distraction. What man do you want to be?" Gemma asked him. Jax didn't turn around, but he took every word his mother said to him, and he knew that she was right. Tara was the distraction, no matter what.

Jax knew that it was a stupid idea, coming here. But he needed to talk to Tara, before things went too far. He loved Sophie, and he always compared every girl he was with, including Tara, to Sophie. And now that he had her, he didn't want to look at anyone but her. But having Tara this close, messed him up. Jax sat on her doorstep, waiting for Tara to come home. After about 10 minutes of waiting, the sound of her car hit the streets.

"Jesus. Are you okay?" Tara asked, as she got out of the car.

"Yeah."

"Hale told me what happened." Tara said, sitting down next to him.

"Kohn's gone. I watched him leave town, when Sophie drove me home." Jax told her, not missing a beat.

"Thank you." Tara said, trying to touch him, but he moved away from her.

"What is it?" She asked, not understanding his behavior.

"You left Chicago 'cause you were afraid this guy was gonna hurt you." Jax said, to sum up what she had told him.

"One of the reasons." Tara agreed.

"Did you come back here 'cause you knew I'd hurt this guy - do what the cops wouldn't do? That I would do this and magically come back to you?" Jax asked harshly.

"God, no. I had no idea he would follow me. I didn't know you'd even still be here, and even if you were, I thought you'd be married to Sophie by now." Tara argued.

Jax had this feeling about her not telling him the whole truth, and he felt stupid for using his time, sitting here, when he could be with the person he loved the most beside his own kid. He needed to get out of here.

"Well, you're safe now." Jax said, and left before she could say anything else. Tara didn't like that Jax was poking around the real truth of her being back. She really had hoped that Kohn would follow her, and that by getting Jax to help her, he would finally leave Sophie behind and be happy with herself instead. She had been moving too fast, and needed to slow down, now that her leverage was escorted out of town.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

This day had been the longest day she had ever had. When she finally got Lowell to rehab, he had refused to go in, and I used about two hours to convince him to let me help him. Happy told me that he wanted me to stay at his place tonight, and not drive back to Charming, but I wanted to go home.

I drove by my house, but when I saw that the driveway was empty, I knew that Jax wasn't there, because I told him not to be here. And now, I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep without him. I let out a tired sigh, and drove towards TM.

It was a huge party going on after the boxing games, but I wasn't in the mood for anything like that now. Jax was standing at the bar with some of the sons, and he could sense me coming in. He turned to look at me, and he could tell by my expressions how tired I was.

"Hey, Sophie. What are you doing here?" Jax asked me, holding his distance from me.

"I'm going to sleep. I didn't want to stay at my house alone, so I'm just going to crash here." I said and walked into Jax's room. Luckily, the noise wasn't that bad back here, and I could easily fall asleep here. I sat down on the bed, ready to get changed, when my phone started to ring. I looked down at the number, and saw Anita calling. I sighed, and picked it up.

 _"Hey, Anita."_

 ** _"Sophie?"_**

 _"Moby? What are you doing up, little man?"_

 ** _"I know it's late, but I wanted to talk to you. You said that if I ever needed it, I could always call you."_**

 _"Of course, sweetheart. What can I do for you?"_

 ** _"I know my daddy got sick again, and I know he didn't mean to lock me in the bathroom, and I want to thank you for saving my daddy. You took him to a place to make him better, right?"_**

 _"Yes, Moby, I did. And I will always help you, okay? Whatever you need."_

 ** _"Okay. Can you come with me, so I can see daddy?"_**

 _"When that day comes, I will take you, I promise."_

 ** _"Okay… I think I'll go to bed now."_**

 _"That sounds like a good idea, buddy."_

 ** _"Good night, Sophie. I love you."_**

* * *

The call ended before I could reply, and my tears were streaming down my face. That little boy was amazing, and I really hoped it would work this time. I hated being this sad all the time, and I wondered if this was all worth it. I tried to wipe away the tears, but it wasn't that easy. I gave up and just changed into my pajamas. I crawled under the sheets, and just let the tears run its course.

Suddenly, I heard the door opened, then closed and locked. I didn't even turn around to know who it was. Jax sighed and just removed his clothes. He jumped into bed next to me, and wrapped his arms around me, holding me as close to him as he could. He didn't turn me around, or anything. He just held me.

"I heard what you did for Lowell. It was a great thing you did, and I'm so proud of you." Jax whispered in my ear. "You're it for me, baby. You're stuck with me."

For some reason, I believed him when he said that. I turned around in his arms, and buried my face into his neck, wanting to take his scent in. Jax let me settle down like that and he just stroked my hair, occasionally kissing my forehead.

"I love you, Sophie Winston."

Was the last words I heard, before falling asleep.

* * *

 **There you have it. Did you like this chapter? I know Sophie seem all over the place, but let's face it: she is... She knows how Jax feels about her, and she also know that there's a possibility that Jax still has some kind of feelings for Tara as well. Anyways... give me your thoughts and I hope I don't use too much time on the next chapter.**

 **Up next: Kohn might not be as gone as they want him to, and Sophie run into someone she really doesn't want to ever see. How will this turn out? Stay tuned.**

 **Until next time xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***MissTeller-Ortiz-Dixon: Thank you so much! I love Sophie and Jax together as well, but Tara is still out there, making evil plans.. will she succeed? Who knows?**

 ***Momoftwins1970: Thank you so much! I know, right? I don't like her that much either. Is it wrong for me to say that I kinda hate her? You and I both know, with Jax and Sophie, something has to go wrong, before it can go smoothly.**

 ***Jeffyzfavoriteskittles27: Thank you so much! I'm glad you think that she fits the story good. That's all I want.. I wish I could say that I won't disappear from time to time, but I do.. sorry about that...**


	11. Hurt

**I am so sorry for the long wait! I know it's been forever, and I hope I haven't lost you all.**

 **Hope you'll enjoy this chapter, and please tell me what you think.**

 _ **I do not own "Sons of Anarchy" only my oc.**_

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

Ernest Darby walked out on his front porch in the early morning, retrieving his morning paper. As he opened the paper, an envelope fell out. It was addressed with just his name, and it made him curious. He sat down on the front porch, ready to open it, when his door opened, and his girl came out with his morning coffee.

"Hey, baby. Whatcha got there?" She asked, sitting down on the steps next to him.

"I don't know yet." Darby said shortly, a little annoyed at his woman. She had always hated it when talked back to her like that, and to be honest, she felt as if she didn't belong here anymore, she didn't even really love him.

"Could you just, go inside and do something else? You're annoying the shit out of me." Darby hissed at her. She knew better than to push the matter, and quietly got up, and walked back into the house. She sighed and walked into their bedroom, but it didn't really feel like hers anymore.

She shook her head and walked over to the closet, moving some stuff away on the top shelf, finding the box stored way in the back. It was a box she hadn't looked at in years, mostly out of guilt. She wiped the dust of it, and opened it carefully. The first thing she saw, was an old picture, a nearly 30-year-old one.

On the back, it said; **_Me and Sophie March 29th, 1979._**

That was the day after her daughter was born, and it was just a few days later, she left her on the stairs of her father's house. Not the ideal way to do it, but she freaked out about being a mother, and Sophie wouldn't stop crying, and she learned later, that she suffered from post-partum depression. When she finally snapped out of it, she thought it was too late to get her daughter back. She knew that her daughter was still in town, and maybe the only way for herself to get out of Darby's claws.

It was a long shot, but it was her only way out…. Before this life got her killed.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I was the one to wake up first in the morning. I couldn't sleep, and I think it's because I know what day it is today, and the fact that yesterday sucked ass. It hadn't been a good day for Jax and me, even though he came into bed last night, telling me that I was stuck with him, that he wasn't going anywhere. I kinda like that he said that, it felt as if I won or something, but the uncertainty was still there. I watched myself in the bathroom mirror, and what I saw staring back at me, was a woman in love, a woman in doubt, but not, you know? I let out a sigh and splashed some cold water in my face, trying to wake up a little more. I wanted this day to go smoothly. This day deserved it. I took the liberty of using Jax's tooth brush, and brushed my teeth, before jumping into the shower. I let the water warm me up. I closed my eyes, savoring this moment of peace, of no interruptions. Or so I thought. The shower door opened quietly, and Jax stepped into the steamy shower with me. I turned around to face him.

"Good morning, darlin'. I thought you left when I woke up to find you gone." Jax said, stepping closer to me, still giving me some space.

"You know that I wouldn't leave without saying anything. Not today of all days." I said, wrapping my arms around his neck. I watched as Jax's eyes light up, and a grin appeared on his face. He knew what day this was.

"Today is the day, Jax." I said, feeling the urge to cry happy tears.

"I know." Jax said, taking a deep breath. "I'm scared shitless."

"You'll do great." I said, running my fingers through his damp hair, because I knew that he loved it, and it made him calmer. Jax looked at me with those beautiful eyes of his, as if he wasn't sure if he could kiss me, or not. I still felt a little out of place with this whole Tara thing, and it was messing me up, but even though I had my doubts, he still stayed here with me, and today of all days, I didn't want to think about that stuff. I made it easier for him, and gave him a kiss, bringing him with me under the spray of water. I could feel him starting to relax, and enjoy this moment together. Jax hissed a little, as the water seeped through his bandage, but it didn't seem to bother him too much.

"I do love you, Sophie. And I will do whatever it takes for you to believe me." Jax told me, running his fingers across my cheek. I could easily argue on that, but I knew that he loved me, and I loved him more than I thought possible, and it scared the crap out of me. Jax kissed me again, and we just enjoyed our time together, enjoy this day together.

Today was the day Abel would finally come out of his incubator. Today was the day Jax would get to hold his son for the very first time.

After our shower, we got dressed, and headed out to the bar to get some coffee and some breakfast. "Good morning, sis." Opie said as he walked through the door.

"Hey, big brother. How's my babies?" I asked, talking about Ellie and Kenny.

"They're good, and it's weird that you call your niece and nephew 'your babies'." Opie answered giving me a hug.

"Yeah, well… that's how it is." I said, hugging him back, before handing him a cup of coffee. "Well, I would love to stay behind and chat, but I have to go shopping… After Jax started to stay the night, my food supply is weird running low that much quicker."

I poked Jax in the stomach, insinuating that Jax was putting on a few pounds.

"You're so full of shit." Jax exclaimed, and I couldn't help but giggle like a little school girl. I'm weird, right? I kissed my man goodbye, and walked out of the clubhouse.

* * *

I called Anita, and said that I could bring Moby with me, so she could set everything up for having Moby the time Lowell was in rehab. She thanked me, and told me that Moby wanted to spend some time with me.

Moby sat in his car seat in the back of my car, as we drove towards the store in the middle of town. He was rather silent, and just looked out the window.

"Are you okay, buddy?" I asked, looking at him through my rearview mirror.

"Yeah… I just miss my daddy. When can I go see him?" Moby asked me, and it broke my heart.

"I don't know, buddy. Soon." I told him, not really knowing when Lowell would be well enough to have visitors.

"Oh, okay." Moby said, before turning his attention out the window. I let out a sigh, and focused on the road. I felt so bad for the kid, he didn't ask for this life. By the time we got to the store, Moby's mood seemed to have changed, and he seemed a lot happier. He laughed and told me stories as I placed him the cart. I gave him my shopping list, telling him to hold onto it, because I needed the help from him.

"So, what's the first thing we need?" I asked, looking down at the list. "Milk."

We walked around the store together, laughing and picking out groceries. At one point, Moby tried to trick me into buying ice cream, but I didn't fall for it. Shopping with Moby, made me realize how much I was looking forward to doing this with Abel. I couldn't wait to hold him in my arms for the first time. After Jax of course.

"Sophie?" Moby said, poking me in the arm as we walked through the rows of cereals.

"Yes, Moby." I said, giving him attention.

"Someone is watching us." Moby whispered, and for a moment, I thought that maybe A.T.F was following me. I looked up, and an older woman caught my eye. She was staring at me, and it was freaking me out. It took me some time to recognize her, because she wasn't with Darby, but this woman was a spitting image for me. This was the woman that gave birth to me. As far as I'm concerned, she was never my mom, I never had a mom, and she would never be my mom. I turned away from her, not wanting her anywhere near Moby.

"Let's go and pay for our food, yes?" I told Moby, and pushed the shopping cart in front of me. I quickly unloaded my groceries, and paid for everything. I did so not want to talk to that woman right now, and not while in the company of a little boy.

I hurried out of the store, and quickly put everything in the car. I was putting Moby in the car, when I heard a voice behind me.

"Sophie." She said, and it made my insides freeze. I didn't know what to do. I looked at Moby, and all I wanted to do, was protecting him.

"I'll be right back, okay?" I told him, and closed his door, and for the first time in almost 30 years, I turned around, and looked at the woman that threw me away like I was nothing.

"What do you want, Penny?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest. There's no way, I'm ever calling her mom.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Jax was at church with his brothers, trying to figure out how to get enough money for the Irish.

"So where are we at with McKeevy's cash?" Jax asked, as Clay put a bag on the table.

"Called in every marker we had. Picked up another 40 grand." Clay told him.

"Bobby got that gig in Laughlin. The owner fronted him the pay already. Here's five grand more for the pot." Tig said, placing another pile of cash on top.

"We got 130." Clay said, feeling kind of pleased.

"McKeevy heads back to Ireland tomorrow and he's gonna need his whole 200 "K" by tonight." Chibs told them, getting them down to earth again.

"We got one more place left to go. The porn queen." Clay said.

"Otto's old lady?" Tig asked.

"Gemma says Luann is picking up two G's a week just from ad revenue from her Web site." Clay told him.

"Yeah. Factor in membership fees, downloads- She's making three times that much." Juice added.

"You should have Gemma talk to Luann. They're tight. Keep us clear of it." Jax told them.

"That makes sense."

"All right, well, Sophie and I are going to St. Thomas anyway. We'll talk to Mom. Kid gets out of the toaster today." Jax said proudly.

"You get to hold your son?" Tig asked, feeling relieved for his VP.

"That's great, Jackie boy. Congrats." Chibs greeted him, and Jax couldn't help but grin. "

"At least we know one good thing's gonna happen today, huh?" Clay said, and the others agreed.

* * *

On the outskirts of town, Ernest Darby was waiting for someone. Someone you would ever think that Darby would ever meet. But you gotta do what you've gotta do. A few bikes stopped not so far away from the bench he sat on, and watched as the one he was meeting inched closer to him.

"Wait here, huh?" Marcus Alvarez told those he brought along, and Darby didn't like it at all.

"I thought we agreed to meet alone." Darby said annoyed.

"My son Esai. I don't travel far from home without family." Alvarez told him, sitting down opposite him.

"Well, hombre, you've got a lot of family." Darby said, only to piss him off.

"What do you want?"

"How's your beef going with the Niner's? You guys making any ground stepping on that heroin monopoly?" Darby asked him. "Eh, it sucks when the competition's got all the big guns."

"You make me drive 40 minutes to shit talk me, asshole?" Alvarez said dangerously.

"No. Got something you might find interesting." Darby answered, giving him the envelope he got this morning.

"Hope it's your last will and testament." Alvarez grumbled.

"No. It's part of an A.T.F. File on the Sons." Darby told him, and it made him a little more interested. "How'd you like to take over SAMCRO's gun business? Niggers can't buy guns, can't protect their heroin. Mayans win out on two fronts- horse trade and gun running. Their Irish gun supplier."

"This is legit?" Alvarez asked him.

"I also know when, what and how their guns are coming in. Everything you need to intercept and renegotiate the distribution agreement." Darby said triumphantly.

"Where'd you get this."

"It's a going away gift from a disgruntled agent. Enemy of an enemy's a friend, right? So what do you say friend?" Darby said, feeling disgusted for using the word 'friend' about Alvarez.

"What do you want?" Alvarez said suspiciously.

"Same thing I always wanted. Charming. You kill Clay Morrow, and while the chicken's running around without a head, you hit the rest. Wipe out SAMCRO." Darby explained.

"That's it? A simple little massacre? You sucking your own pipe, gray boy?" Alvarez said, not so sure he should trust him on this.

"Charming P.D. And the feds have hit a wall with these bastards. They sent me this file for a reason." Darby told him. "Now, do you really think they're gonna give a shit about an outlaw bloodbath? They'll count the bodies, count their blessings, and close the case."

When Alvarez didn't reply, Darby didn't think that he would be interested in this, and started to leave.

"Hey, hold it. It's not that simple, man." Alvarez argued.

"No. It is that simple, man. You hit Clay first, then you kill the rest. I get Charming. You get the gun intel. Now what part of that is confusing your little brown brain? Do it quick before they catch on." Darby hissed before leaving for good.

Esai walked up to his father, not liking this at all.

"What'd he want?" Esai asked him.

"Gotta put down a couple of dogs making my life miserable." Alvarez answered.

"Let me and my boys do it." Esai offered.

"You think you can handle that weight? Just tell me who." Esai said, wanting to prove himself to his father.

"SAMCRO boss. And that greedy cracker shithead." Alvarez ordered, double crossing Ernest Darby, wanting it all and not just a part of it.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I stood there, waiting for the woman to say something. I think it threw her off that I called her Penny. I don't think she was prepared for me to actually agree to talk to her. Penny stood there for a few minutes without saying anything, and I was losing my patience.

"Well? Are you going to say anything?" I asked annoyed. "I have stuff to do today."

Penny took a deep breath, before she glanced into the car.

"Is he yours?" Penny asked me, gesturing to Moby.

"That's not really your business, now is it?" I answered, crossing my arms over my chest, trying to block her view of Moby.

"It's nice to know if I have a grandson." Penny started to say, and I saw red.

"To your information, he's not my kid. And even if he was, you would have no claim as grandmother what so ever." I hissed, and it seemed as if Penny felt bad about saying it.

"I'm sorry, okay?" Penny said pleadingly.

"Sorry for what? Sorry for not wanting me? For dumping me the first chance you got?" I had to do whatever it took, not to scream and yell at her.

"I kinda deserved that." Penny said, and I grew tired of her.

"Look… I have a lot to do today, I have someone that needs me, more than you do. So why don't you do what you do best, and get the hell out of my life." I said harshly, meaning every word of it. I turned around to get into the car, but Penny grabbed my arm.

"Damn it, Sophie! I need you to listen! The Sons are in danger. Darby got this envelope with pictures this morning, and I think it will bring that club of yours down for good." Penny told me, but I only narrowed my eyes at her.

"Why should I believe you?" I hissed at her.

"Because Darby would kill me if he ever knew that I was having this conversation with you." Penny answered. Somehow, I just knew that she told me the truth. But the part of me that hated her, was bigger than the part that held the compassion I felt towards her. This was the woman that abandoned me, leaving me without a mother. I was never going to do that to Abel.

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn." I said, before getting into the car, leaving that pitiful woman behind. Why would I care about what happened to her? I didn't owe her anything, right?

I drove the car out of the parking lot, gripping the steering wheel as tightly as possible.

"Sophie?" I heard Moby say from the backseat, and it brought me out of my train of thought.

"Yes, sweetheart?" I said, trying to mask my anger.

"Why are you angry with your mother?" Moby asked, and I almost drove off the road.

"Why would you think that she was my mother?" I asked, trying not to seem affected.

"Well, because of how angry you got. Whenever I get angry, or my daddy does, I always remember that we only get really angry at the ones we love… even if they leave us." Moby said, and it made my heart melt. How is it possible for a kid to reflect those feelings?

I didn't know what to say to that, and we drove the rest of the way back to Anita in complete silence. Moby had given me something to think about. And I didn't know why.

* * *

I drove Moby back to Anita's, and I loved the way he hugged me goodbye. It felt good to do something nice for that boy. Doing something nice for Lowell. After leaving the two of them, I drove myself to the hospital. I can't believe that Abel is finally coming out of the incubator today. We've been waiting for this day for so long. I walked into the hospital, knowing that Gemma was already here. She texted me earlier, and told me that she was going to be there. I slowly opened the door to Abel's room, alerting Gemma of my arrival. She turned to look at me, and broke into a smile.

"Hey, baby girl." Gemma said, and I gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"Hey, Mama Gem." I replied, before turning towards Abel. "Hey, baby boy. I can't wait to hold you."

I stood there watching him, and Gemma studied me.

"What's going on with you?" Gemma asked me.

"Oh, just a rough morning, that's all." I answered with a sigh.

"Rough, how?" Gemma pressed on, and I didn't know what to actually tell her.

"I ran into Penny this morning." I told her, and Gemma froze.

"Wait… The bitch actually talked to you? The nerve of that whore." Gemma grumbled. "What the hell did she say to you?"

"Nothing important. She tried to warn me about something Darby was planning, but why should I believe her? She's so full of shit anyway. She's not trustworthy." I answered, picking at my nails. "I don't see why my dad wanted to screw her anyway. I mean… How could she just leave a child? I looked at Abel once, and I find myself not wanting to miss a day in his life."

Gemma looked at me with compassion. Penny was a sore subject for me. She knew that I had a lot of questions about what happened back then, but she knew well enough to know that I would never ask Penny about that.

"Hey… screw her. You don't owe her anything. She was the one to leave you behind. If she shows up again, I'll bust her ass." Gemma said, and I knew she meant it. They never said anything about it.

"Hey. Don't mind that bitch. Let's just focus on what's to come." Gemma assured me, and I knew that she was talking about Abel. I couldn't wait to have him in my arms.

"Thank you, Gemma. I love you." I said, grabbing her hand Gemma squeezed mine back, and gave me a smile.

"I love you too, sweetheart." Gemma replied. I turned back to Abel, and I really couldn't wait to hold him. "Hey sweetheart. I can't wait until your daddy get to hold you for the first time. It will be magical."

Gemma kept her eyes on me, and she had that calm look on her face. It was freaking me out.

"What?" I asked alarmed.

"Nothing. It's just nice to see you talking to your son." Gemma answered, and it made my insides melt. She really considered me as Abel's mom, even though I didn't give birth to him. And not matter what, I would always see myself as his mother. I loved that boy more than anything else.

"Hey. How about I go grab us some coffee, how does that sound?" I asked her.

"I'd say that sounds good right about now." Gemma responded, and I walked out of the room to find some. It seemed so surreal that this day was finally here, it made me smile without even knowing it. I stood by the coffee machine, looking like a creep. I leaned on the nurse's station while doing so.

"Well, I know that look." Rosie said from behind me.

"Hey, Rosie. It's not what you think. Abel is coming out of the incubator today." I told her.

"That's wonderful news, dear." Rosie beamed happily. "How are things with Jax?"

I let out a sigh, and leaned over the counter.

"Well. I want to say that everything is fine, but I don't know. I'm just waiting for the next blow, you know. Waiting for something to come between us again." I told her honestly.

"I think that you've experienced so many things to go wrong in your life before, you can't seem to think that something great is happening to you, Sophie. Give him the benefit of doubt. He may surprise you. Now… What else is bothering you?"

"Well… I ran into the old hag today. As in the woman that gave birth to me." I answered, suddenly feeling agitated.

"Whoa. That's… that's something." Rosie replied.

"You don't say. I haven't talked to the woman in almost 30 years. I don't understand why she would try and contact me now. She never wanted me." I said, trying to figure out how to deal with Penny. I did not need her in my life right now.

"I don't know what to say to that." Rosie said with compassion. "I cannot see myself ever doing anything like this to my children."

"Yeah, but unlike her, you wanted your kids, she never tried to get me back." I argued softly.

"Maybe the one you should be asking about this, is her. Or maybe your father." Rosie suggested, and I knew she was right, but I didn't want to think about that today. I grabbed the coffee's and said goodbye to Rosie, before going back towards Abel's room. I tried my best to push everything with Penny in the back of my mind, only focusing on the fact that Jax would finally be able to hold his little boy.

I was about to walk through the door of his room, when I saw Gemma and Jax, standing there talking to each other. For some reason, I didn't want to disturb them, and stood hidden to listen to their conversation. What? I'm nosy.

"I didn't mean to go off on you last night." Jax told his mother, and I knew he was talking about his reaction towards the destroyed nursery.

"I'm sorry too." Gemma replied, and I knew she felt awful. "Strange time, Jax. So much shit is changing. I just worry- About you, about him. About Tara, and about Sophie, and what it will do to her if Tara got her way.

"What happened with me and Tara is ancient history, Mom." Jax said, not trying to argue.

"She hurt this family. Tried to pull you away." Gemma said softly.

"I didn't leave, did I?" Jax shot back.

"But she did. Broke your heart." Gemma said, trying to get through to her son.

"I was 19. It was first love bullshit. Or at least I thought it was. I grew up. I got over it. It's time you got over it too. And I will do everything in my power to do what's right by Sophie. I would never pursue anything with Tara. I don't want to be that guy." Jax said, and I couldn't help but smile. He was trying so hard to show that he loved me, and it made me fall in love with him even more.

I decided that it was about time to walk back into the room like I hadn't listened in on their conversation.

"Hey." I said, and Jax's face lit up when he saw me there. He wrapped his arm around me, kissing my cheek lovingly.

"I talked to the nurses. Dr. Namid's still in surgery. It's gonna be awhile before they take him out of there.

"Yeah. I came early to talk to you and Sophie. We need a favor." Jax said, using that charming smile of his, and I knew that he needed something from us, or at least someone.

* * *

Jax told us about the money they didn't have and needed badly. I knew that Luann would be the answer to those problems. Gemma said she would talk to her, and left the room to call her. I turned towards Jax, debating if I should tell him about Penny. I didn't want to bother him with my problems.

"Hey… Where's your head?" Jax asked me, kissing the side of my head.

"It's nothing to worry about. I just have a lot on my mind, that's all. But it's nothing to worry about." I answered.

"No, I'm not buying it. What's going on?" Jax pressed on, and I let out a sigh.

"Penny walked up to me at the store today." I told him.

"What? Wait… your birth mother?" Jax asked, knowing very well who Penny was.

"Yeah… if you can call her that." I mumbled.

"What the hell did she want?" Jax asked, getting agitated.

"I don't know. She was blabbering about Darby, and that we should keep an eye out for him, that he wanted to destroy you. Like we haven't heard that before." I said, not sure how Jax would take it.

"Well. It's not like he's never tried before. Why is any different this time around?" Jax brushed off.

I hated the fact that I was letting Penny get to me, even though I didn't want her to. It was annoying, really.

"Just promise me, whatever's going down tonight, be careful, okay?" I asked him, not wanting to sound too hen-like.

"I'm always careful, babe." Jax said, giving me a kiss. "I'll see you back here later."

I watched as Jax walked away from me, and he look damn good doing so. I had to bite my lip from moaning out loud. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world.

* * *

I blew a kiss towards Abel, and walked out of his room, trying to find Gemma. She was sitting in the waiting room, biting her nails. I rolled my eyes, not knowing why she would be nervous for talking to Luann.

I looked at my phone, seeing a text from my dad. He told me that Chance missed me, and wanted me to swing by the cabin for lunch. My dad could be a real softy when he wanted to be. I decided not to interfere with what Gemma had to talk to Luann about, and walked towards the exit. I walked passed the nurses station, seeing Tara standing there. I tried my best to ignore her, but no luck there.

"Sophie!" Tara called after me, but it didn't make me stop.

"Sophie!" She called again, running after me.

"What?" I snapped, but continued to walk.

"So, this is the day Abel get out of the incubator." Tara said, keeping up her pace.

"That's what they tell me." I said shortly, trying to get her to understand that I didn't want to talk to her.

"Will you be there when I had him over to Jax?" Tara asked me, and that made me stop.

"I am going to be there every step of the way, and there's no way, you'll be the one to hand over our son to Jax. Not if I have anything to say in it." I hissed at her.

"That's not your decision, is it? Abel is not your son, and I am a doctor in this hospital." Tara argued back.

"He's my son, no matter what you say. And I don't want you anywhere near that moment, do you understand me? Why do you even think that Jax would want you anywhere around for one of the most special moments in his life?" I shot back at her.

"Oh, I think he would. He told me so… last night. He came by my house, you know, after he defended my honor against Kohn yesterday." Tara said smugly. That's why he came home late last night. I didn't want to show her that I was insecure when it came to jax.

"If I seen you remotely close to that room when Jax gets Abel, I will make sure, that you're the next one getting hospitalized." I spat at her, before leaving the hospital. I've already asked Rosie to do it. There's no way, Tara gets to witness the happiness with my family. It wouldn't feel right at all. That woman made me so furious! Who did she think she was? It's not my fault she left town when she did. She's a bitch.

Speaking of bitches… I couldn't help but groan, when I saw someone waiting by my car, biting her nails.

"You know, I could get a restraining order against you. See how you're stalking me right now." I said, making Penny jump at the sound of my voice.

"Sophie. You don't have to like me, but you need to believe me when I tell you this. Your club is in danger. You are in danger!" Penny said frantically. I did not need this right now.

"Okay. I was going to let you down easy, but it seems as if you're not going away at all, so… Why now? Why come back after all these years, wanting to know me, wanting to warn me about something that's always been a risk. I don't want to know you, so you should just walk away now… you're good at that. You left me once, I don't need you. I have someone who loves me. A father that loves me and was there for me. I don't need a woman like you in my life." I said harshly. "You disappeared for almost 30 years, and for all I care, you can disappear for at least another 30 years."

I walked around to the driver's side of my car, ready to get in, but Penny stopped me again.

"If you think I stayed away willingly from you all those years of your life, you're wrong. I did come back, not long after I sent you off to your father. I was alone, I had postpartum depression. Something that runs in the family, which you should probably look out for, it you're ever lucky enough to get your own children someday. And by the time I dug myself out of that dark hole, your dad told me to get lost, that I didn't have any rights anymore. And then Gemma Teller told me to get lost, chased me off with a shotgun, telling me to never lay my eyes on you again. I tried to get to know you. I send letters, but they were always returned to sender, or something else happened to them. I showed up at your high school graduation, but they kept me at a safe distance. Making sure I'd never get close to you."

I did not know about this. She couldn't possibly be telling the truth, right? They wouldn't do that.

"You're lying." I hissed through gritted teeth, but Penny only smiled at me, and stepped closer to me.

"Why don't you go and ask the father you love so much? Ask him about what really happened back then." Penny added, before turning around, walking the other way. I stood there for a few seconds, trying to figure out what to do. What the hell happened all those years ago? I knew I needed to find out the truth.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

In the meantime, Gemma sat in the waiting room area, actually waiting for someone, and that was Luann. She needed to make this deal happen, she needed to convince her best friend to help them out with the money they owed. And she knew how to get it.

It didn't take long, before Luann walked through the doors, carrying a stuffed teddy bear.

"Hey, baby. Is Abel out yet?" Luann asked as she approached Gemma. "Is Sophie still here?"

"No, not yet. And Sophie just left to have lunch with Piney." Gemma answered. "Appreciate you coming."

"Oh, I wouldn't miss it." Luann said with a smile.

"Can we talk? I need to ask you a favor." Gemma asked her, figured she would just asked right away.

"Sure. What is it?" Luann said quickly.

"Well, it's not for me, actually. It's for the club. They need 70 grand, cash, by the end of the day." Gemma told her.

"What happened?" Luann asked, genuinely concerned.

"I don't know details."

"You want me to front the money?" Luann asked, not sure about this.

"A loan, yes." Gemma told her, and she could see her friend's turmoil.

"That's a lot of cash. I don't know, Gemma." Luann said, trying to get away from this uncomfortable scene.

"I got a pretty good idea what your bank account looks like." Gemma said with a scowl.

"What does that mean?"

"Oh, come on. Don't get all humble now. You're always bragging about the business- The money, the Corvette, new tits. Here's a chance to use your cash for something that matters." Gemma told her harshly.

"I paid my dues!" Luann hissed at her. "Six years of taking two in the ass while some teenager blew a load on my face. I earned that producer's chair."

"No one said you didn't earn it. But Otto is the one who fronted you the money- pulled those dicks out of your ass so you could put it in that chair." Gemma grumbled, getting up to walk away. "Don't you ever forget that."

"I could probably get my hands on 50. Maybe 55." Luann finally agreed, and Gemma let out a sigh.

"That would really help. Thank you." Gemma said, feeling relieved.

"Twenty percent." Luann said suddenly.

"What?"

"Interest. It's business." Luann said firmly.

"You'd better rethink that percentage. Bad shit happens to greedy whores." Gemma told her with her unspoken authority. The one that Luann new she didn't dare to question.

"Five percent." She finally agreed on, but she was not happy about it.

"Get it." Gemma said, gaining a huff from Luann. Gemma knew that this was all an act. She knew that Luann was good for the money. She was just acting like a fucking drama queen.

* * *

Jax was on his way back to TM, when he saw a truck on the side of the road. He recognized it to be one of Oswald's trucks. He noticed people standing around, and that when he knew that something bad had gone down.

"Oh, shit." Jax exclaimed when he saw the driver had gone through the windshield. He tried his best to get the man out of there, jumping into the truck, barking orders at the people around.

What surprised Jax the most, was the fact that the driver was still alive, due to him screaming in pain.

"You'll be okay. You're gonna be all right. All right, you've got help now." Jax told him, trying to calm him down.

Jax noticed something that the others didn't. He saw the bags of pills on the floor of the truck. He knew exactly where he got those damn pills.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

It didn't take me that long to reach the cabin. I only had to stop to get some food and drinks at the local store. I had to do something to stall seeing my dad after everything Penny told me about what happened all those years ago. Did she tell me the truth, or did she just finding a way to mess with my head? I knew that the only way I would find out, is to ask him, and I knew when he was lying to me. And I knew that I would cause havoc if he tried.

I drove down the dirt road, seeing the cabin coming into view, for some reason, I felt nervous. I didn't want to question my own father.

As I turned off the engine, Chance came running through the door, barking, trying not to fall as he ran.

"Hi there, sweetie!" I exclaimed, wrapping my arms around him. "Do you have a good time with grandpa?"

I let him go and grabbed the bags out of the car. I let out a huge breath and walked towards the cabin.

"Hey, sweetheart." Dad said as I walked through the door.

"Hey." I said with a sigh. I looked at my dad, sitting there with a cigarette in one hand, and whiskey in the other. "I brought some food, if you're not full after whiskey and other sort of crap."

Dad looked at me, raising his eyebrow.

"Don't start, Soph… that's not why I invited you here." Dad argued, coughing a little as he did.

"See you're feeling better." I said sarcastically.

"It's just a cough. I'll survive." Dad said with a smile.

"Whatever." I said, starting to prepare the meal without sitting down or talking to him. I knew that he was following my every move, because I could feel his eyes in the back of my neck. I was so not in the mood to talk about it right now, mainly because I was scared.

"What's going on with you?" Dad asked carefully, placing his glass on the table.

"Nothing's going on with me." I said a little too quick. "I'm just hungry, and I want to get lunch done."

Dad didn't seem to believe me but didn't press the matter.

"What are you making?" He asked, getting up, walking towards me.

"I was thinking maybe Pasta Bolognese. Mama Gem's recipe." I told him, washing the tomatoes.

"You want some help?" Dad offered, something he hasn't done in years. It made me smile a little at his effort, and I nodded my head.

"Yeah, that would be great." I said, handing him the onions. It was moments like these when I didn't want to believe that he was keeping something as important as my mother away from me all these years.

* * *

We sat down together to eat, which smelled delicious, but I didn't actually feel that hungry. I pushed the food around a lot on my plate, glancing down at Chance, sitting there by my feet, trying to use his cuteness to get me to give him some bread.

"So, are you going to keep lying to me, or are you going to tell your old man what's bothering you?" Dad said, breaking the silence.

I knew that it wasn't any way out of this. I let out a sigh and put my fork down on the table.

"I… uhm… I ran into someone today." I said, not being able to look him in the eye.

"Who?"

"Penny…" I answered, watching how my dad's face change drastically.

"What the hell did she want?" Dad asked with a huff.

"I don't know. Talking shit, mostly. But she did tell me some things." I said, finally looking at my dad. He didn't dare say anything, waiting for me to tell him what she said.

"She told me that she reached out to me a few months after she gave me up. She told me that you and Gemma sent her away, not allowing her to get to know me." I said, and dad shifted uncomfortably.

"Well, sweetheart. She was a mess back then. She was unstable. I couldn't risk you getting caught up in that." Dad said, and it made me irritated.

"She told me she had postpartum depression, dad. That's not her fault. You should've listened to her." I said, knowing how suffering from that depression clouds your judgement.

"I don't care what she had or didn't have. I only cared about you, and she wasn't good for you. She didn't really care about you." Dad argued. "Don't believe anything that comes out of her mouth."

"Did she come to my graduation?" I asked, and dad started to get irritated. "She told me she showed up, but you all did your best to keep her away."

"Yes, she showed up, but by doing so, she broke the rules. She wasn't supposed to come anywhere near you." Dad told me.

"You had no right to keep her away." I barely whispered.

"I had every right! I had every right, keeping that woman away from my daughter!" Dad said, raising his voice.

"What about the letters, huh?" I yelled, getting out of my seat. "Penny said she wrote me letters, but that you and Gemma kept them away from me, destroying them!"

"Yes, all right! She sent you a letter every fucking week until your graduation! But Gemma and I decided not to give them to you!" Dad yelled back at me, and that made me go completely silent, tears burned in my eyes.

"You had no right. You had no right not letting me decide for myself if I wanted to be in touch with her. You had no right deciding that for me!" I said, finally letting my tears fall.

"I had every right deciding what's best for you, the second she accepted that money she got to stay away from you!" Dad said, and I froze.

"What?" I whispered in disbelief. "What money?"

"John, Otto and I pulled our money together, plus doing a run up in Tacoma, just to make enough money to pay her off." Dad confessed, and I didn't want to believe it.

"How much? How much did you give her?" I asked, not knowing if I should be offended or happy. I felt like crap either way.

"$ 150 000." Dad said, and I felt as if the air was leaving my lungs. My own mother backed off from ever knowing me. For money.

"So that's all I was worth to you, huh?" I asked my voice broken. "$ 150 000!?"

"I was prepared to give her whatever it took to keep her away from you! If I had to give her a million, I would have robbed a bank, just to get enough. She was dating Darby by then, and there was no way in hell, you would be allowed to grow up with him." Dad was both angry and sad, but so was I.

"Well, you weren't exactly daddy of the year." I hissed, and walked out of the cabin, before I could say anything else that I might regret. Chance ran after me, not understanding what was going on. He understood that something was wrong from all the yelling, but he didn't know what. I walked out to the woods, finding the old tree house from our childhood, and with some difficulties, I managed to bring Chance up there with me. This was the only place I wanted to sit right about now.

* * *

 **Third person p.o.v**

Piney watched as his daughter walk out of the cabin after the fight they just had. This was something he knew was coming somewhere down the line, but after the years went by, he started to believe it wouldn't happen. He picked up his phone, calling the one other that knew about this that wasn't dead or in prison.

 _"Hey, Gemma. Some crazy shit just went down."_

* * *

Jax returned to the clubhouse after the E.M.T took the injured driver away, and Jax tried his best scrub his blood away.

"Darby runs his meth lab out of a diesel yard in Pope. It's where all the mill drivers score their crank." Opie told him and the others.

"This is definitely Darby's shit. This rock's been stepped on so many times, it's barely a narcotic." Juice said, knowing his way around drugs.

"See, Darby's making his move into Charming dealing at that lumber mill." Tig said, taking a swig of beer. "Clay, we gotta send this Nazi asshole a clear message now."

"All right- Why don't we just go talk to the driver? Ask him where he bought the meth." Jax said, trying to calm the situation down a little.

"Go." Clay ordered, giving Jax the clear. He brought Opie with him and left the clubhouse.

"How's McKeevy's cash piling up?" Chibs asked Clay.

"Luann came up with 55. We need 15 more. We got six hours to find it." Clay answered with a sigh.

"If you ever want to own a top rocker, prospect then you better bring 15 grand to the table, sharpish.

You got me?" Chibs told Half-Sack as Clay and Tig walked away. And he felt nervous, saying the first thing popping into his head.

"Why not ask Sophie for the money. I mean, you have borrowed her van before." Half-Sack suggested, and he gained a slap on the back of the head, and a shove down from the barstool.

"What's wrong with you, jackass?! You never go asking Sophie Winston for money like that." Chibs said, cursing the prospect for even suggesting using their Princess' foundation money to pull this off.

He had so much to learn.

It was not in Gemma's plans to drive up to the cabin today, but after the call she got from Piney, she couldn't help it. When Sophie told her that she had seen Penny, she knew it was a possibility of this happening. She just hoped that it wouldn't come to this. She hated the fact that she lied to Sophie for the past 29 years, but what's done is done. She just hoped that Sophie would forgive her.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

I sat up there in the treehouse for god knows how long, Chance was sleeping beside me, on his back, paws in the air. I looked at the pictures on the walls that we put up here after Thomas died, and it brought tears to my eyes. It's been 18 years since he died, but sometimes, it feels like yesterday. How much easier things were back then? I missed that boy so much.

I sat there wondering how things would've been, if Penny had been a part of my life. Would things have been better?

Suddenly, Chance woke up, growling that little not-threatening growl of his, alerting me that someone was approaching. The one person I least expected to climb up a tree, was coming up right now.

"Shit! Fuck!" I heard her curse on her way up. If someone had told me that Gemma Teller would ever climb a tree in high heeled boots, I would say that you're crazy, because it was a sight to see.

"What are you doing here, Gemma?" I asked as she finally managed to get into the treehouse.

"Jesus Christ!" She exclaimed, looking at the distance. "Your dad called me earlier. He told me what Penny told you."

"Are you here to tell me that he was lying to me, that she never wanted me?" I asked, turning away from her.

"No, I'm not going to tell you that. Because I'm done with the lying about what happened back then." Gemma answered, sitting down next to me.

"Why did you do it? Why did you offer her money?" I asked, looking at her with tears in my eyes.

"Sophie… I know this is hard to understand, but… there's a reason for my actions." Gemma said, and I wanted to hear her out.

"I was the one that found you on Piney's porch. Penny had left you on the porch the night before, and let's not forget, this was late March, early April, and still very cold outside during the night. Your body temperature was dangerously low, your lips were blue, you were screaming because you were hungry. You were only a few days old, and you only had a thin blanket, and almost nothing but a diaper. I was lucky that I found you when I did." Gemma told me, wrapping her arm around my shoulder. "The next thing I remember, is Piney and I, rushing you the hospital. Piney had barely seen you, but he fell in love with you in an instant. He was so worried about you, and he sat by your bedside for days. Myself included. The only reason your dad wasn't taken to jail, was because I witnessed that he didn't know about your arrival before I banged on his door that morning."

I looked up at Gemma and I could tell that those memories were hard for her to talk about.

"And when that bitch came around again a few months later, all I could see in my mind, is the picture of you laying out there in the cold, and I kept on thinking about what would've happened if I hadn't found you when I did." Gemma said and wiped away a tear. It wasn't something you see very often.

"The Sons and I made a promise to always protect you from her, whatever the cost, and if I had to do it all over again, I would do it in a heartbeat." Gemma fished out something from her pocket. It looked like a letter. "I didn't keep the other letters I didn't return, but something told me to hold onto this one. It was mailed to you right before your 18th birthday. I'm sorry I didn't give it to you before."

To hear Gemma Teller, apologizing for something, was huge. I didn't know what to say. On one hand, I wanted to strangle her for keeping this from me, but still, I understood why she did it. I would've done the same thing.

"Thank you, Mama Gem." I said, giving her a hug.

"You're welcome, baby." Gemma replied, holding me close, kissing my forehead. Sometimes, it's easy to forget that I'm close to thirty, but I will never be too old for Gemma's hugs and kisses.

"How did you even get that dog of yours up here?" Gemma asked as Chance wedged himself in-between us, craving some love and attention.

"A hell of a lot of willpower." I said with a laugh through my tears. I hated feeling like this.

"Yeah, I'll bet. So, now that you have the letter. What do you want to do?" Gemma asked me, making me look down at the letter.

"I don't know yet. A part of me wants to read it, another part of me wants to rip it up and feed it to her." I answered, and Gemma rolled her eyes a little.

"Well… maybe you should figure out what you really want to do, and just hold onto that for now." Gemma told me, and she was right.

"Come on. Let's get back to Charming." Gemma added, and I agreed. I needed to get back home. I needed to see Jax. She needed to be there when Abel came out of that incubator.

* * *

 **Third Person p.o.v**

Opie and Jax parked their bikes outside the hospital to go see that truck driver. But the most important thing he could think about right now, was the fact that in a short few hours, Jax would finally hold his son for the first time. But he wasn't planning on doing it alone. He wanted Sophie to be there with him.

"Are you okay, man?" Opie asked as they walked inside.

"Yeah… everything is great." Jax replied. As they stepped up to the nurse's station, something caught their eyes, as some questionable men walked into the elevator.

"Darby's guys. Can't be good." Jax said, before asking the nurses where to find driver, Andy.

"Holy shit." Opie exclaimed as he walked over to the bed. "Andy. Who did this to you?"

"Nords." Andy answered with a groan.

"Why?"

"I was in way deep with Darby on my crank debt. Like 2,700." Andy told Jax.

"Where you buying?"

"Up in Pope."

"Not in Charming?" Jax asked him.

"Can't score shit in this town." Andy told them.

"Anybody you want us to call? Family or friends?" Opie asked him.

"No. Oswald's gonna fire my ass when he finds that tanker empty, man." Andy moaned in pain.

"What are you talking about?" Jax demanded from him.

"Well, the Nords said that the diesel was payment for my crank debt, so they came here, they beat the shit out of me and they took my keys." Andy told them.

"It was a full tanker?"

"Yeah. It's at the county impound off the 18." Andy said, before a nurse came in, and kicked them out, yelling at them for not giving an injured man some rest.

The two men grabbed their bikes, and made their way to the compound quickly, but someone beat them to it.

"Well, there goes our 15 grand." Jax said.

But luckily, Jax and Opie managed to get the truck back, and it saved their asses, getting the rest of the money for the Irish.

* * *

 **Sophie's p.o.v**

Gemma and I drove our separate cars back to TM, but Gemma stayed behind a little while longer, wanting to talk a little with my dad. I didn't even want to know what they were talking about, but something told me, they would talk about what Gemma had told me about Penny.

I arrived at the clubhouse, looking for Jax, and Clay told me that he was inside his room for a little while. I desperately needed to see him, and made my way over to his room. I knocked before entering, and I could hear him call out from the other side.

"Yeah?" Jax said, and I opened the door. It was so good to see him again, and I wanted nothing more than for him to hold me.

"Hey Darling." Jax said with that beautiful smile of his. I didn't say anything, and just laid down next to him, snuggling tightly to his chest. Jax didn't question it, and just kissed my head.

"What did you do today?" Jax asked me, and I let out a sigh.

"I went up to the cabin to have lunch with my dad. That was a disaster." I told him, and it made me kind of sad again.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Jax offered, and I knew that it would be wise of me to tell him.

"It's just… I learned something about my biological mother, that's all." I said, and it made Jax look down at me.

"Like what?" He pressed on.

"Just promise me that when we have kids, and I go completely crazy, don't keep my kids away from me, and just help me get better." I told him, and I could tell that Jax didn't understand what I was talking about, but he knew better than to ask.

"Oh, Sophie… I already know that you're crazy, but I promise you to keep you and our future children safe. But let's start with Abel, yes?" Jax said, and I couldn't help but blush.

"Hey, Jax? I know that this seems to be out of the blue, but when we finally bring Abel home from the hospital, I want both you and him to move in with me at my house. I want us to live together as a family." I said, my heart almost beating out of my chest. I was afraid that I've scared him away. But Jax only smiled widely at me, and gave me that wicked grin of his.

"I thought you'd never ask." Jax answered like a girl, and I couldn't help but laugh so hard.

I placed my hand behind his neck and brought him down for a kiss. Jax let out a groan and dropped the book in his hands. I just wanted to forget the world for some time, and just be here in the moment with him.

A sudden knock on the door, interrupted us.

"Hey! If you're done humping like bunnies, the hospital called. They're taking Abel out of the incubator soon!" Gemma's muffled voice sounded through the door. Both Jax and I broke apart, and looked at each other with a strange look on our faces. Oh, shit! We were finally holding our son for the first time.

We untangled ourselves, and I actually fell off the bed in the process. Jax tried his best not to laugh, but he couldn't control himself.

He burst out laughing, but I didn't care. I jumped up and opened the door, finding Gemma standing there thinking we've gone completely crazy.

"Let's go daddy." Gemma said to her son, before turning to me. "You too, mommy."

I tired my best not to be a complete mess on the way to the hospital. I was so glad that I was in my own car, and Jax on his bike, because I wouldn't have made it otherwise.

* * *

As we parked at St. Thomas Hospital, Jax approached me right away. He grabbed a hold of my hand, holding it tightly as we walked together with Gemma inside. Rosie stood there waiting for us with a huge smile on her face.

"Hey, Sophie, Jax. Are you ready?" Rosie asked us, and we only nodded our heads. This was too surreal to actually be true. "Come with me."

Rosie showed us into a nursery, where Abel would stay for his remaining time at the hospital.

"Why don't you get comfortable, and I'll go get your son." Rosie told us, and left the room. Jax sat down on a chair, but I couldn't help myself from pacing. This must be how the other families felt like when they would get to hold their baby for the first time. Gemma grabbed my hand, to try to get me to calm down a little. She was just as nervous as Jax and myself.

A slam of the door, alerted us about something happening. Rosie came into view and carried Abel with her. He has grown so much, and he was even more beautiful out of the incubator.

"All right little man, say hello to your father." Rosie whispered, before handing Abel over to Jax.

"Hey…" Jax said, completely in love with his son. "I'm not sure how to break it to you, kid. But I'm your old man."

Gemma motioned for Rosie and me to follow her out, giving Jax some time alone with Abel. But as I turned to leave, Jax grabbed onto my wrist.

"Stay." He pleaded me with a teary smile, and I couldn't say no to that. Gemma and Rosie left, and stood next to Jax, watching Abel with adoration.

"He's such a beautiful baby." I whispered, and Abel recognized my voice. He turned his little head to me, and made some joyful noises.

"You wanna hold him, mommy?" Jax asked me.

"Yes, please." I answered, holding out my hands.

"Here's mommy, little man." Jax said softly, and the moment I held Abel in my arms, everything changed. My life revolved around this very boy, nothing else mattered.

"Hi, baby." I whispered. "I'll always love you, and I will always protect you."

I kissed his forehead and let a few tears fall down my cheeks. Jax wrapped his arms around us and held us tightly against him. This was the perfect picture of our family.

Sitting there with Abel and Jax, gave me time to think about always wanting to be there for that little boy, and it made me think about how it was possible for Penny to give me up. Maybe she was telling me the truth about her depression? I may not trust her, but it would be wrong of me not to hear her out, let her tell me her side of the story, before deciding to cut her out of my life for good.

* * *

Jax noticed my state of mind as we left the hospital together.

"Hey… what's going on in that pretty head of yours?" Jax asked me, and I let out a sigh.

"I know I don't owe Penny anything, but I learned something today, and I think I need to talk to her about it, before I can make up my mind about wanting her in my life or not." I told him honest. I could tell that he didn't like me going over there by myself, but I promised him that I would get Penny to meet me outside, and not interact with Darby.

"All right, darling, but you call me the second you're out of there, or the second you need me… And I'll come, okay?" Jax told me, and I just nodded.

"Yeah, I promise." I told him, before giving him a kiss. Jax kissed me back more firmly, and felt my knees buckled. He held such power over me, and I loved him so much.

"I love you, Sophie Winston, and I can't wait for me and Abel to move in with you." Jax told me, before kissing my forehead.

"I love you too, Jax. More than you know." I said before getting into my car. He watched me drive away, and I made my way over to Darby's house. I never thought in a million years, that I would voluntarily go to that house. What the hell is wrong with me?

I parked just down the street from Darby's house, looking to see if the lights were on, which would indicate that they were home. I didn't have Penny's number, so I knew that I would have to knock on the door to get attention.

I sat there in my car, trying to figure out how to do this. On how to go up there and tell Penny that I wished to talk to her. If I knock on that door, everything will change. Would I be able to get her away from Darby? Would I be able to get her life back on track, if that's what I wished?

But sitting here made me lose my nerve. I couldn't do this. There's no way I could make this work. She didn't try hard enough to stay in my life.

"This is just stupid." I mumbled to myself, and decided against going to the door. I placed my phone back in my purse, but it made the whole thing fall to the floor.

"Shit!" I exclaimed, reaching down to clean it up. That was when I found the letter. The letter from Penny that Gemma had kept since my 18th birthday. Something told me to read that letter now. Maybe it would help me make up my mind about talking to her.

"Just do it, Sophie." I told myself, and ripped the letter opened.

* * *

 ** _My sweet, wonderful daughter_**

 _Well, the day is finally here. You've finally turned 18, and I'm so sorry that I haven't been there for you. I'm sorry that I chose the cowardly way out of this. But out of all the mistakes I've made during my life, giving birth to you, was not one of them._

 _I remember the day I found out that I was pregnant with you. It wasn't the ideal time, and considering who your father is, not the best decision to let myself get pregnant. But finding out that you were in there, made me turn my life around, and I was going to leave this life behind. I was determent to raise you, to give you the life you deserved._

 _And when you finally came on a fine spring morning in 1979, my life was complete. Or at least I thought it would. Giving birth to you, was no picnic. It was a hard 23 hour labor, and I did it all by myself._

 _What happened next, wasn't something I thought would happen. I couldn't seem to be happy to have you. Whenever you started to cry, I wanted to throw you out the window. I wanted to shake you to make you stop. I just wanted some peace, I wanted to feel better. After a few days of no sleep at all, I snapped. I didn't know what else to do. I put you in your car seat, wrote your dad a letter, and left you on the porch of his house. I wasn't thinking clearly._

 _Later on, I learned that I suffered from post-partum depression, and I finally got the help that I needed. By that time, it was too late. I tried to get you back, your father and the rest of them, told me to get lost. They showed me pictures of you in the hospital, being treated for staying out in the cold all night. It broke my heart. It was my fault, I made sure you almost died. So, when your father and Gemma offered me money to stay away from you, I took it. Only because I felt guilty. I couldn't bare to look at you, and not get over the fact that I almost killed you._

 _I want you to know, Sophie Marie Winston; there's not a day that goes by, were I don't wish things differently. And look at the woman you've now grown up to become. I am so proud of you, and my hope is that you'll find your way back to me some time in the future._

 _I really want to get to know you._

 _I love you, Sophie Marie. I love you with all my heart._

 _Love, your mom._

* * *

Tears clouded my vision, and her words really got to me. It wasn't the most epic apology, but it still came from her heart. The only reason she accepted the money, was because of guilt. She felt so guilty about what she did to me, and she thought it would be easier if I never forgave her for it.

I wanted to talk to her. I needed Penny to know that I was ready to talk to her.

The sound of gunshots rang through the air, startling me from my thoughts. The sound of screaming, chilled me to the bone, and it was coming from Darby's house. I reached for my gun in the glove compartment and jumped out of the car without thinking. Another car came rushing past me, and I fired after it. I just lost all common sense.

After the car had disappeared, I ran towards the house, not knowing what to expect. It was horrifying. It was blood everywhere. On the walls, the floor… there where two bodies on the floor that was visible. A woman and a man.

"Hello?" I called out, to see if there's someone else here. Darby came out of hiding, holding his gun at me.

"Whoa! Darby, what happened?" I asked, noticing the wild look in his eyes.

"Did you see the ones shooting?" Darby more yelled than asked.

"No, I only saw them driving down the road." I told him honestly, looking around the house.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Darby hissed at me.

"I came here to talk to Penny, was she here before the shooting started?" I asked frantically. The look on Darby's face changed, and I knew that she was here somewhere.

"Penny!" I called, hoping that she'd gotten away.

"Penny!" Darby called as well.

"Sophie." We heard someone whisper, and it came from the kitchen. I ran towards the sound, and I found Penny, lying on the floor in the kitchen, blood pooling around her.

"Penny!" I screamed, dropping to my knees next to her. She was fighting to breathe. She was shot in the neck, probably cut an artery. I tried my best to stop the bleeding, but deep down, I knew there was nothing I could do to save her.

"Sophie…" She tried to say, but I stopped her.

"I know, Penny. I know. You're going to be fine, do you hear me? You are going to be fine, and you and I are going to talk about that letter you wrote me when I was 18. We're going to try to figure things out." I said with tears in my eyes.

"No, we're not." Penny managed to say. "But I'm glad you're here now."

"Of course, I am." I told her, smoothing down her hair. "Because I forgive you."

Penny smiled weakly, looking straight at me. Her eyes had a harm time focusing, and I knew that she would soon leave me, again.

"That's all I ever wanted."

That was the last thing Penny ever said. In the next moment, her breathing stopped, and I knew she was gone. I knew she was dead.

* * *

I couldn't cry, I couldn't do anything. All I know, is that Darby called 911, but I don't remember much more than that.

I sat there, holding Penny hand until I felt a hand on my shoulder. Unser stood there, looking down at me, silently telling me to come with him. I didn't want to leave Penny, but there was nothing I could do for her now.

Unser wrapped a blanket around me, and brought me to the police car. He didn't care that I was covered in blood, and he only took me in to question me about what I witnessed.

The only one I wanted to see right now, was Jax. I needed him to be there for me. I fished out my phone and dialed his number. It went straight to voicemail. I tried several times, but the same happened.

What on earth could he be doing right now? Why didn't he answer his phone, when he promised me that he would always be there?

Unser looked at me in pity, and dialed a number himself.

 _"Hey Gemma. I need you to meet me at the Police station right away. It's about Sophie."_

* * *

 **There it is. I know it seemed sudden to kill Sophie's mother off, but I just couldn't see her joining the rest of the story. So I thought it was better to just kill her off right away, but that doesn't mean that Sophie won't take this hard.**

 **And what about the fact that Sophie couldn't get a hold of Jax? Do you think that he slept with Tara or not? You'll get the answer in the next chapter and I know how it will go down. But give me your thoughts on what you think happened when Jax didn't answer the phone.**

 **Until next time xD**

 ***cathrineoriginal***

* * *

 ***SassyGrl23: Haha! I loved your comment! I hope you don't throttle me. But I didn't give anything away in this chapter. Stay tuned for the next ;)**

 ***Emmettluver2010: Thank you so much! I hope that he doesn't get too caught up in Tara-land, but you'll never know.**

 ***The true Hero of Skill: Sorry for the wait! I want to try and finish this story, it just takes a lot of time.**

 ***MissTeller-Ortiz-Dixon: I know right? I loved Moby and Lowell on the show. We all know that Jax will mess up somehow, but if it will be with Tara; time will only show. I am so sorry about the delay. My daily life just caught up with me. Right now, Sophie is at a very fragile state, so she won't be too forgiving if Jax screws up again in the near future.**


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